Anxiety caused by socialising - Thinking aloud

[cactuarjon]

Hey, I'm mainly just thinking aloud here, but do feel free to chime in.

Right now I'm anxious. I'm at work. I'm forced to be here because society says I have to work to earn a living. I can't live without a wage. Bills, food, rent - these all require me to be here today.

But I don't want to be. The office where I work is quiet. But I would much prefer it to be quieter - ie nobody here at all. Ever.

I'm not anxious for fear of making a fool of myself. I'm not anxious from worrying about what people think of me today. I'm not anxious or worrying about people laughing at me.

I am anxious because I am having to 'see' and 'talk' to people when i really really don't want to. There is nothing more to it than that.

So having said that... Is there a difference between social awkwardness caused by anxiety and anxiety caused by social awkwardness? Is my anxiety making me way over think things right now? :sign20:

What do you do when you really don't want to be within 100ft of people on any given day?

[zo100704]

I’m not sure about social awkwardness but I feel a lot like u, like I wish I didn’t have to go to work and go through this daily internal struggle. Some days are better than others. However, most days all I want to do is to be left alone and people not realise I’m there so I don’t have to go through the torment of my inner thoughts controlling me. “am I going to blush” “are they going to notice” “what Iif they ask me something I can’t answer” “why do they want to talk to me”

I wish I could be free of these thoughts and be like some of my confident colleagues. How I wish I could be like them 🙁

You just have to push through each day. There is no other alternative, as like u said, u have to pay the bills...