OMG what have I done??!!

[xBettyBoopx]

Hi to all

This might be a long post-apologies in advance!

I live in a one-bedroom council flat and have agreed to having a new kitchen put in - what was I thinking??!!

Apparently it will take nearly 3 weeks (kitchen is only about 6 x 6), starts today at 8am, trouble is I'm agoraphobic and won't be able to get out to get away from the noise and dust etc etc, I'm so stressed and anxious about it, I already have chest pain!

I have had to put all kitchen stuff in boxes and that really stressed me today, no room for anything in a small flat. I get panic attacks at night so I normally stay up very late and sleep most of the day, but I won't be able to do that. I'm so scared that I'm going to have a heart attack with the stress and worry, and won't even get to see the new kitchen. I think agreeing to do this is the worst decision I have made in my entire life, I don't know how I'm going to put up with 3 weeks of this. I know that I need to take my mind off of it but I can't, any suggestions? Too late to say that I've changed my mind now and I wish I could turn the clock back.

Can worry and stress etc cause such chest pain? I must have been out of my mind when I agreed to this. Well, there's nothing I can do about it now.

Sorry I needed desperately to get this off of my chest and please let me know if you get chest discomfort/pain from tension/stress/worry.
Thanks.
Elspeth

[sheena]

Hi


I had my kitchen extended, all new units and electricty points a few years ago. I used to cry to my friend because of all the mess and upheaval and she used to tell me to try and concentrate on how good the kitchen was going to be. I don't know if that helped, but it did help to talk to someone about my anxiety.

How about trying to make your bedroom all safe and snug. Can you take you TV in the bedroom with an inside aerial. Take your kettle in so you can have a cuppa. Pre make some sandwhiches and things to eat. Some books or magazines. A radio for some music. It is just a suggestion but that is what I did when I had the workman in for the kitchen. I just let them get on with it. They thought I was so good that I did not winge or moan at them that they put a door up for me and carpet down.

I am an agoraphobic who is slowly getting better to go out into the outside world and I still hate it when I have to have strange men in my house to fix something so I shut myself in the sitting room and let them get on with it.

I hope this might be of some help and keep coming back on the to forum during this difficult time for you. :hugs:

Sheena

[belle]

Hi..

You "may" get chest pain through anxiety and stress, because its one of the horrible side effects we get....BUT....it doesn't cause heart attacks. Its unpleasant, i think we can agree on that, but not harmful. I have had a lot of anxiety related chest pain over the years and yes i was convinced that i was going to have a heart attack, but i had loads of tests and it showed nothing wrong with me!!!

As for having people in your house, i can completely sympathise with you. Even now i HATE HATE HATE having people in my house, especially when they are there to mend something. I recall one time when i was really ill with my panic attacks i had a man in to mend the boiler, he was only going to be there for a maximum of 10 minutes and i told him that i did suffer from panic attacks so if i needed him to leave the house for a moment so i could compose myself, would he mind. Whether he did or didn't, i had a panic attack and he had to sit in his van while i calmed down.

I think Sheena has some really good ideas to take you away from the dust and mess. I don't know whether you have a laptop or not, but i take mine into my bedroom with me, shut the door and put on the DVD player! I'll watch something funny and light hearted.

I'm sure you'll be okay :)

x

[Lindalou64]

hello yes chest pains we can get from anxiety dont mean your having a heart attack....just think this way 3 days will fly by and you will have a new kitchen think of the positive side of this i know its hard maybe you can read a book or something in ya room well they are working, stay positive wish ya the best..Linda

[xBettyBoopx]

Dear Sheena, Bluebell and Linda

Thanks so much for your replies, they have helped me a lot.

Today wasn't as bad as I expected:) although there was only about 3 hours work done (no wonder they take 3 weeks to do it lol) :blush:

Sheena - Thanks for all the suggestions:yesyes: I did stay in my bedroom this morning for a while with my cat lol, as she wasn't very well, but as soon as the 'banging' started she darted out of the window, so she wasn't that ill:D I have kettle etc in the living room at the moment, as all the floor in the beroom is taken up with boxes of pots and pans etc, but I could just move them. The workmen were very pleasant and did their job pretty quickly (gutting the kitchen). Electrician coming 2moro at 7.45am eekkkkkk!!! LOL xx

Bluebell - Thanks for emphasizing with situation, I really should be so looking forward to it when it's finished, it's just getting there:shrug: xx

Linda - thanks for answering and your best wishes. xx

Take care all for now,
Love Elspeth

[strawberrie]

hi elspeth, i'm sorry you're having a hard time. i can totally sympathise with you as i am just at the end of having builders in the house for 7 months (was supposed to be a 3 month job, builders huh!). i was dreading it because i've always hated having people in the house, and thats why we put it off for years, but it hasnt been anywhere near as bad as i thought.

i think you've been given some really good suggestions - try and have your bedroom as your 'safe' room, away from the mess and disruption. I tried to make sure i had the things i would need somewhere that i could get to them easily without having to go backwards and forwards past the builders. Well, that was at the start anyway, by now i'm so used to them being around they're just part of the furniture really, i have to be careful to remember to close the door when i go to the loo! :blush:

I think that as long as you have one place that you can go that you can keep private it will be fine - i would just lock myself in the bathroom and read a book in the bath sometimes. Just keep telling yourself it will be worth it when it's finished, it really wont be that bad, i promise! :hugs:

good luck!
mag

[mystics]

Hi Elspeth,
Reading your post reminded me of my kitchen renovation summer 2005, I went through the nooooooooooo way can i cope with this 3 weeks of workmen in and out of my "safe place", please let me to try and reassure you that the workmen are only in for an hour or so each day and some days over the 3 weeks they dont even come, if you feel you can ask them to show you the timescale of who is coming in when etc... I found knowing that my house was going to be mine for a day or so really helped me cope.

Sorry memory span of a goldfish but someone has already suggested try and make somewhere your "safe place" mine was up the garden in the gazebo with laptop, all electrical appliances in the shed lol kettle, fridge, microwave, looking back on it now it must have looked so funny.

All will be great when done and you will be so proud of your new kitchen.

(((((((((((reassuring hugsssssssssss))))))))))))))))))))
Mystics :flowers: