psychadelic-brie
21-12-17, 12:52
I am so sorry to be posting but I am in such a bad way. I have been slowly withdrawing off of Seroxat (AKA Paroxetine/Paxil) for over a year. I tapered too fast recently in the stupid hope of avoiding withdrawal symptoms at Christmas time. Well that's backfired because since then I have been very anxious and had a complete meltdown on Saturday. I then stayed in bed from Sunday to Tuesday because I was so paralysed with panic. My mother has managed to coax me downstairs the past few days. I managed to get an emergency appointment with my GP on Tuesday and he advised I go back to my last stable dose of Seroxat (which I already started doing on Sunday) and said within a week I should feel relief. He's also put me on 2mg Diazepam three times a day which takes the edge off. I am just so panicky and anxious still. I have never felt it like this before. I am terrified constantly. I have been unable to eat since Sunday. The past few days I have managed a few odd bits of fruit and bread but my throat feels physically closed over. My doctor said he wasn't worried about that at the moment, I should just eat when and if I can. He also booked me another doctor's appointment a week today. I honestly feel like I am going mad though. I feel like I am going to die. Or something worse than dying! I frequently feel like I am going to be sick or mess my pants which makes me more anxious! I also have emetophobia. I am finding it so hard to see light at the end of the tunnel and it's unbearable especially with Christmas. I just want my mum with me constantly but she has to go to work. My step-dad has kindly rearranged his hours to be with me when she goes to work tonight but I can never work out if I feel more anxious around him or not. My mum is my 'safe person' and when she's not around I am terrified. I have never known terror like this. I am not suicidal because I am scared of dying, but I don't know how I am going to get through this.
Meant to add that the doctor has referred me to the mental health team for them to help with my medication which is something. I am extremely sensitive to Seroxat and it's a controversial medication as it is. I was also worried about Diazepam addiction so he has assured me it won't come to that and I actually need it at the moment. I dread to think how I'd be without it right now because I'm still very panicky on it.
Meant to add that the doctor has referred me to the mental health team for them to help with my medication which is something. I am extremely sensitive to Seroxat and it's a controversial medication as it is. I was also worried about Diazepam addiction so he has assured me it won't come to that and I actually need it at the moment. I dread to think how I'd be without it right now because I'm still very panicky on it.