Are my cancer fears justified this time?

[Scaredy_Cat]

Hello, and thanks in advance for ready. I'm basically posting here because, like many who will ready this, I believe that I have a serious illness (cancer). I'm 29 years old and I have suffered with health anxiety (HA) for some time but on this occassion I believe I am right to be concerned. However, I have suffered with HA for so long that I just don't know anymore. I'll quickly sum up what's been happening:

- Suffered with diarrhea, cramps and urgency for years and was diagnosed with IBS in around 2010
- 2016 saw blood in stool for first time
- 2017 finally referred to gastro
- Calrprotectin stool test shows very high inflammation in my bowel, sent for colonoscopy for suspected IBD
- Colonoscopy stopped half-way through due to too much pain (Dr decided to stop). Found no sign of IBD
- Armpit lump that is painless and has been there for at least 2 months. GP doesn't know what it is and has referred me for an ultrasound scan.

Before the colonoscopy, the gastroenterologist said bowel cancer is highly unlikely and that this is "almost certainly IBD" - I'm yet to see him again. He also said (in a letter to my GP) that I have an "almost phobic fear of bowel cancer". He didn't know about the lump in my arm as I forgot to mention it (it wasn't as big then).

So that's what's happened so far. I am so terrified and have diagnosed myself with bowel cancer and secondary lymph node cancer. I know an armpit lump can be anything, but I think infections are usually painful and isn't, and it's getting bigger, and Google seems to tell me that if it's painless and gets bigger, it's cancer. Also, my arm feels tired.

I'm so convinced that I have this and I'm just wondering if my fears are justified. As I mentioned, on this occassion I think they are, but I've had HA for so long that I just can't tell anymore. All thoughts on the matter will be greatly appreciated.

Thanks

[O_O]

Sorry you're feeling this way. I think I have something too and, like you, I've no idea any more what is rational and what isn't.

Of course, the best people to advise you are the doctors and they say you're probably fine. They know what they're talking about and they've been the ones to actually examine you... so we can't possibly know any better than them!

If I had your symptoms of course I would be worried. Having unpleasant physical symptoms is bad enough but when you're linking them all together to get a terminal diagnosis then it's unbearable.

For what it's worth, sounds like IBS or something similar to me. I don't know if you'd get a cancerous lymph node in your armpit with bowel cancer. It would probably be more likely to be in your groin if anywhere. Is the node hard? Can you move it?

I think all you can do is trust your doctors and have the tests they recommend. They think you're fine, so you're probably fine!

[Fishmanpa]

Are my cancer fears justified this time?

IMO, no. I'm a survivor of Stage IVa Head and Neck cancer. My brother in law is a survivor of Stage IV Colon Cancer.

Cancer in an uncontrolled growth of abnormal cells. It doesn't come and go nor does it stop once it starts.

Several doctors and tests point to an inflammatory condition typically associated with stress and anxiety. So no, I don't believe your fears are justified. That being said, the real issue is coming to grips with that, accepting the medical professional's diagnosis and opinions and doing something to treat your anxiety about this. It's a known fact that anxiety and stress cause digestive issues. Treating the root of the problem will go a long way in treating the physical symptoms associated with it.

Positive thoughts

[paranoid-viking]

and Google seems to tell me that if it's painless and gets bigger, it's cancer.

Thanks


So Google is telling you that if it is painless and bigger it is definitetely cancer and you wont need any thest to confirm this? So the doc just need to diagnose you straight away and send you to cancer treatment? Think rationally. Google search can not diagnose you.

[susie1]

I've been there. I know how panic stricken you are. Christmas makes it worse because every one is happy and you can't see beyond cancer. I have been like that so many times but you are catastrophising. I can see that with objectivity. I am not belittling your fear just saying that you are adding 2 and 2 and making 100. If you had even a partial colonoscopy and they were worried they would have either continued regardless or done it again. Our bodies are full of lumps - I know all mine and at times I have been terrified - but it sounds like nothing sinister. Nothing at all. Please try to think logically about this. You need to enjoy your life now. I have wasted so much of mine being terrified and I think my quality of life has been poorer than if I was ill with cancer.
x

[Scaredy_Cat]

Thank you all so much for your replies - it's very much appreciated and it really does help!

Fishmanpa, sorry to hear you went through that, must have been awful. Glad you've managed to beat it though.

I think the reason I'm so worried this time is because I know there is inflammation there as my test showed it (my score was 2000, normal is below 50), so it's definitely not IBS as that doesn't cause inflammation. And it's not an infection because I had the same test months earlier which also showed inflammation (plus they tested the stool for infection). I'm just so worried because they still don't know what is causing it. I was really hoping they'd see IBD when they did the test but from what they saw, there was no signs of it. So that makes me think there may be a tumour higher up (in the bit they didn't manage to get to). They did take biopsies though, so I'm waiting for the results of those, but that apparently takes 4-6 weeks.

But it is completely true that I am catastrophising, and although my symptoms could be caused by cancer, they also may not be. Guess I just need to try to remember that.

Thanks again