Can't take it anymore

[Anon22]

I am a student and i have been suffering from this problem for the past few years, I have always kept it in the dark and not told anyone else yet. My father is a hot tempered person and also the biggest ******* i know. He never listens to anyone's opinions in the family, he on rare occasions abuses my mother when she makes small mistakes. These are all problems that you usually see in an underprivileged family, however my family is by no means "poor", we are actually pretty wealthy. We can easily afford the best things in life and live happily yet my father always is so calculative with his money and he says that " i might not be able to send you to the US universiity as i might have not enough money" What ****ing parent says that, like i know easily that we are worth about 10 million dollars. I hate him really even though he is my parent and i sometimes feel that if he were to die, i would be happier. If anyone, just anyone can please advice how should i cope with this.

Anon

[Speranza]

I can't advise you because only you know your situation. But perhaps it would be good to think of ways you can live your life without being dependant on somebody who you don't feel is going to offer support.

If you weren't from a wealthy family, what would your life plan be?

[Anon22]

i try to be as independent as i possibly can, he just likes to be a busybody and control most aspects of my life by force and he thinks what he is doing is the "best". Any attempts to explain or voice opinions would be shut down as he would always say: Being at this level today. i must be doing most things right. What have you achieved to give me opinions?

I sometimes wished that i was able to trade all this wealth just for a loving family that most people are so lucky to have.

[Speranza]

I'm not sure I agree that these problems usually appear in underprivileged families.

In fact, your father's comments are pretty familiar to me. In the UK it would be something like, "I'm a self-made man, you can't tell ME what to do!"

I think the best way forward might be to work on your self esteem (lemotional abuse damages us in ways we don't even notice for years) and also to come up with a realistic plan for your life - NOT one that depends on your father giving you money to go to the US. What can YOU manage? can you get a job and study?

People who are determined to change their situation can do it. Maybe see this as like an old folk tale - a test of your character and determination.