hoppipolla
29-06-07, 00:54
owh >.<
i don't know what to doooooo. Just discovered i'm £222 overdrawn or something like that which makes sense because i haven't been working but i don't know if i feel up to work still while i'm living with my mum (she drives me nuts) and I can't get benefits because I haven't got the National Insurance whatever-it-is that you need and I can't even be bothered arguing with them anymore :(
I'm going to try and apply for some tomorrow maybe. i just feel like a walking problem right now. ugh. i mean, whatever i apply for i won't get it, and i'll feel self conscious, bossed around and chained down even if i DO get it. Then the panic kicks in like it always does. Why can't I just get a break? Cool friends to see often or a girlfriend or SOMETHING? Or my stall to work (like I said in my other thread).
hmm.
So i sit here at the computer niiiight after night and daaaay after day lol. It's the only place i can at least talk to people and try to move my life in a direction, or failing that get some escapism. and i broke my laptop... hehe but i know how to fix it :)
oh my. *drums fingers on desk* i just want the world to feel a little more comforting and welcoming so i feel more equal, not overwhelmed and stressed by my mum, criticized and stressed by my dad, and shoved aside and bossed around by the rest of it. :(
£222 :( !! i have about 1800 in savings so i could transfer it, but i really shouldn't. Maybe i just will, just so i don't have to worry about the overdraft. I have so much enthusiasm and so much spirit and so much blind hope but i feel so... confused and alone and strange. It's been a tough couple of years :(
Hoppi :flowers:
i don't know what to doooooo. Just discovered i'm £222 overdrawn or something like that which makes sense because i haven't been working but i don't know if i feel up to work still while i'm living with my mum (she drives me nuts) and I can't get benefits because I haven't got the National Insurance whatever-it-is that you need and I can't even be bothered arguing with them anymore :(
I'm going to try and apply for some tomorrow maybe. i just feel like a walking problem right now. ugh. i mean, whatever i apply for i won't get it, and i'll feel self conscious, bossed around and chained down even if i DO get it. Then the panic kicks in like it always does. Why can't I just get a break? Cool friends to see often or a girlfriend or SOMETHING? Or my stall to work (like I said in my other thread).
hmm.
So i sit here at the computer niiiight after night and daaaay after day lol. It's the only place i can at least talk to people and try to move my life in a direction, or failing that get some escapism. and i broke my laptop... hehe but i know how to fix it :)
oh my. *drums fingers on desk* i just want the world to feel a little more comforting and welcoming so i feel more equal, not overwhelmed and stressed by my mum, criticized and stressed by my dad, and shoved aside and bossed around by the rest of it. :(
£222 :( !! i have about 1800 in savings so i could transfer it, but i really shouldn't. Maybe i just will, just so i don't have to worry about the overdraft. I have so much enthusiasm and so much spirit and so much blind hope but i feel so... confused and alone and strange. It's been a tough couple of years :(
Hoppi :flowers: