View Full Version : Should I just get laid to distract myself?
Like a lot of people know I’ve been panicking about my eyesight and bad eye exams. Won’t mention it anymore here. I’ve cluttered the board enough with it and I already asked for all those threads to be merged. Sorry about all the clutter! I kind of think I should do something to distract myself. Like getting laid! Unfortunately I also have anxiety about my sexual orientation. I often have anxiety about possibly being bisexual even though I only want to be with girls. I’m also anxious about being awkward around girls since I have no experience. I don’t feel like I truly look gay. So I cut off my hair. Even with short hair I worry about looking like a kinky bisexual girl and attracting creepy guys. I know my anxiety is a burden to people. I’m thinking of just hiding it and keeping things fun and casual. Or will I just get hurt or hurt people. I’m also thinking of getting some tattoos or piercings to distract myself. I know they will hurt, but not as bad as my panic attacks.
ankietyjoe
21-01-18, 23:48
I don’t feel like I truly look gay.
I think you're just taking the piss now.
Honestly, do whatever you want. :wacko:
I think you're just taking the piss now.
Honestly, do whatever you want. :wacko:
Why?
People just don’t take my sexuality seriously. I’m worried that will get in the way of dating or getting laid.
Should I just get laid to distract myself?
~lol~ Great thread title.
Your insecurities aside... Let's see, great distraction and stress release and if the opportunity presents itself?.... Go for it IMO. Just be sure to practice safe sex :winks:
Positive thoughts
Should I just get laid to distract myself?
~lol~ Great thread title.
Your insecurities aside... Let's see, great distraction and stress release and if the opportunity presents itself?.... Go for it IMO. Just be sure to practice safe sex :winks:
Positive thoughts
Not much opportunities. I don’t think it’s easy for OCD freaks like me to get laid. I can’t flirt to save my life. I can’t just sit there and look pretty like the straight girls.
MyNameIsTerry
22-01-18, 01:22
I would suggest working on your anxiety. Have sex if you want but will it only feed your worries about yourself & your sexuality.
And don't get used by people who see your insecurities.
It doesn't sound like much of an exercise in self esteem though.
I would suggest working on your anxiety. Have sex if you want but will it only feed your worries about yourself & your sexuality.
And don't get used by people who see your insecurities.
It doesn't sound like much of an exercise in self esteem though.
If I wait to have sex until I’ve worked on my anxiety I’ll die a virgin. How do I avoid people who see my insecurities? I keep attracting guys who get obsessed with taking care of my mental health even though I have no desire to even be with a guy!
MyNameIsTerry
22-01-18, 01:47
I meant do things because you want to, not because you are tired of anxiety and need a release so get used by anyone just looking for a one night stand.
Do you talk to people in the LGBT community about their experiences? It sounds like you would benefit from understanding that you could be going through things which are part of determining your sexuality? OCD can get you very mixed up with your thoughts and we don't always realise it's our anxiety latching onto something a non anxious person would go through.
Are you concerned your OCD is HOCD? And that HOCD is trying to persuade you to find men attractive?
I'll just add, I know OCD well but not the experiences of someone who is gay, bi, trans, etc. So, it seems to me it is useful to know this from both sides, anxiety and sexuality.
I meant do things because you want to, not because you are tired of anxiety and need a release so get used by anyone just looking for a one night stand.
Do you talk to people in the LGBT community about their experiences? It sounds like you would benefit from understanding that you could be going through things which are part of determining your sexuality? OCD can get you very mixed up with your thoughts and we don't always realise it's our anxiety latching onto something a non anxious person would go through.
Are you concerned your OCD is HOCD? And that HOCD is trying to persuade you to find men attractive?
I'll just add, I know OCD well but not the experiences of someone who is gay, bi, trans, etc. So, it seems to me it is useful to know this from both sides, anxiety and sexuality.
Yeah. I do have issues with HOCD. It sucks. Right now eye anxiety is taking over, but my HOCD symptoms can get pretty bad. The worst thing is, my stalker keeps triggering my HOCD on purpose.
Ahh ok yes it can seem to take for ever to get help, but if you don't mind me asking what help have you tried to get? There's many MH Charities in our towns and cities and it can be a mine field to negotiate to find the right help hurdle after hurdle to jump not nice and it's gets tiring. Also contacting the LGBT would be the best bet really and I would say no don't get laid just because it's a distraction you could end up being hurt and used and you are a far better person than that :) ATB
I really want to get laid right now. Too bad I couldn’t be more unsexy at the moment. I have this stupid eye situation, so I’m wearing glasses more than I want to. I just don’t feel all that sexy in glasses. It’s not just that. I also have braces. So I have braces and glasses. I also have terrible eye anxiety. I’m worried I’ll start talking about it. I also have a bloated face and awkward haircut, but that’s another story. I won’t get my braces off until a year or so later, but I might somewhat resolve my eye issues in a month or so.
MyNameIsTerry
09-02-18, 04:24
I posted this on one of your other threads but I'm not sure if you saw it? It's HOCD from the perspective of a gay member:
www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=195010
As for the above issue, not everyone is put off by such things. Many people look beyond appearance and at who you are. You could be the most attractive person on the planet but if your personality is poor, it's a turn off for many people.
As an average looking straight bloke it's never been exactly easy to "pull" with or without alcohol. I've always found it easier with people I already interact with in some way e.g. work colleagues, people in other social groups, etc. So, if you are not confident in "pulling" maybe there are other avenues for romantic involvement?
A lot is to be said for confidence too. If you appear confident, people can find that attractive.
Feeling self conscious is difficult but many have such worries and still find their partners in life.
I posted this on one of your other threads but I'm not sure if you saw it? It's HOCD from the perspective of a gay member:
www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=195010
As for the above issue, not everyone is put off by such things. Many people look beyond appearance and at who you are. You could be the most attractive person on the planet but if your personality is poor, it's a turn off for many people.
As an average looking straight bloke it's never been exactly easy to "pull" with or without alcohol. I've always found it easier with people I already interact with in some way e.g. work colleagues, people in other social groups, etc. So, if you are not confident in "pulling" maybe there are other avenues for romantic involvement?
A lot is to be said for confidence too. If you appear confident, people can find that attractive.
Feeling self conscious is difficult but many have such worries and still find their partners in life.
To be honest I don’t want to date anyone who likes me for who I am at the moment. Mainly because I’ve recently dealt with this internet stalker who claimed to call in love with me because of who I am. He really stalked me, so he knows a lot of things about me I didn’t want anyone to know. I’d rather just get laid without all those emotions and just feel sexy. I just want my personality out of the equation. I feel like glasses, braces and awkwardness brings too much personality. I feel weird when people find those things attractive. I’d rather not be noticed for those things. I’m also way too obsessed with my eyes right now. I just don’t think I can pay enough attention to another girl. My general obsessiveness and distance will make things hard. I’m just too self absorbed right now.
Actually I too don't want a relationship with anyone it's too complicated and cant do with the extra stress levels involved, but that doesn't mean I want to have sex either try and have some self respect as word will get around in a community that all you want is sex and you will be used is this really what you want?? Have a think about that! ATB
Actually I too don't want a relationship with anyone it's too complicated and cant do with the extra stress levels involved, but that doesn't mean I want to have sex either try and have some self respect as word will get around in a community that all you want is sex and you will be used is this really what you want?? Have a think about that! ATB
Maybe I can just try to date, but avoid too much emotional connection like a lot of people. For that I need to stop obsessing over my problems so I can never talk about them.
I just have too much anxiety at the moment to deal with dating. Whoever I’m dating will probably want to help me with my anxiety. That’s waaaay more emotional intimacy than I want.
How do you hook up with someone without them getting invested in your baggage?
I just have too much anxiety at the moment to deal with dating. Whoever I’m dating will probably want to help me with my anxiety. That’s waaaay more emotional intimacy than I want.Not strictly true some will run a mile so no worries there. ATB
---------- Post added at 10:13 ---------- Previous post was at 10:07 ----------
How do you hook up with someone without them getting invested in your baggage? Well for one don't tell them unless it is written across your face lol. Also why not simply make new friends to start with it's lot less intense and not as complicated as dating I have one really good friend known him years so even that friendship took years to get to where it is now and it's still less complicated than dating even now :) ATB
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.