Anxiety - back to square one?

[Woodpigeon]

I was ill with anxiety and panic about 5 years ago. Since then I’ve had a few ups and downs, but managed to hold things together fairly well. I’ve been off medication for a year or so an generally been happy.

My Anxiety has come back like a ton of bricks (mainly due to work related stress) I constantly feel dread and have lost all my confidence. Hopefully this is a blip and I’ll start to feel better soon.

Feel bad about taking more time off work, but feel I really can’t cope.

Anyone been through a relapse like this? Any advice to help speed recovery?

Thanks

[Jennifer@kilden]

Hi woodpigeon
Sorry to hear your feeling bad at the moment, I'm sorry to say I'm in the same boat.
I first had my bad anxiety 5/6 years ago - went on citalopram and after a few months felt better. Came off them, after 3 months was bad again so took them again. So I'd been on the tablets 20mg fir around 2/3 years. Felt marvellous- come off them in June 2017 and felt fab still.
So January 2018 has been totally stressful and to top it off I've had the flu, needless to say I'm back feeling the old symptoms of anxiety, and I just can't shake it. My head hurts from constant thinking about how I feel and the fear of going back to how I was before, I can't eat and feel dread upon waking, so I had some meds left from last time - I've cut the 20mg into quarters and have taken 5mg for a couple of days , I feel I need to do it slowly again as my side effects were so bad previously- I will go up to 10mg and then 15mg then to 20mg.
I have a doctors appointment today so I'll see what she says.
It really is awful isn't it?
Will you be taking medication....?
I'm trying to carry on and be "normal" but it's just a show to be honest- because inside I just feel like crying and screaming because I'm back here again!!
I really hope you feel well soon x

[Woodpigeon]

Hi, thanks for your message - sorry to hear you are having a bad time.

I got some meds a couple of weeks ago just in case I needed them as I wanted to see if I could get through this without them. The last week has been awful so I gave up and started them again this morning. They worked well in the past, but do take a while to kick in.

Hope your doctors appointment goes well and you get the support you need.

[Jennifer@kilden]

Yes that's it - they worked well last time - they will work again - we just have to ride it out .....
I too thought I'd be able to overcome these feelings myself- but I gave in too, these feelings are awful and I want to feel better asap again.
You no what tho - if they make us better than why not take them, I'm looking forward to waking up without that dreaded anxious feeling.
What tablets are you taking?

[Woodpigeon]

Agree - that’s the conclusion I’ve come to. I have sertraline 50mg at the mo, was on 100mg previously so trying to take it one step at a time. Just hoping it will pass soon. Taken today off sick and have a GP appt on Monday.

[Jennifer@kilden]

That's what we got to keep telling ourselves- we have been here before- we no it'll pass- x

[cattia]

I've had a massive relapse this year too. I had a couple of brutal spells in my twenties, went on meds and eventually came out the other side. I've been up and down through my thirties but managed to keep my head above water with it all. Turned 40 and BAM, all hell broke lose. Massive anxiety relapse. I'm starting to get through it now but it's hard being back in that place that you'd hoped not to end up in again. The main thing to remember is that you've done it before, you can do it again. It will get better in time but it's hard when every day is so tough x

[Jennifer@kilden]

Hi cattia
Yes your right it is so damn tough when your feeling so bad with anxiety etc... but we have been here before and we no the symptoms all to well and the side effects of medication- but we also no it will get better x
I am struggling eating at the moment- no appetite at all.
Are you on any meds? X

[up a ladder]

I was ill with anxiety and panic about 5 years ago. Since then I’ve had a few ups and downs, but managed to hold things together fairly well. I’ve been off medication for a year or so an generally been happy.

My Anxiety has come back like a ton of bricks (mainly due to work related stress) I constantly feel dread and have lost all my confidence. Hopefully this is a blip and I’ll start to feel better soon.

Feel bad about taking more time off work, but feel I really can’t cope.

Anyone been through a relapse like this? Any advice to help speed recovery?

Thanks
Oddly enough this is exactly where I am at now. Since returning to work after Christmas, I managed 2 weeks and had to take 2 weeks off. I have never taken time off due to Anxiety but was so overwhelmed this time, I had no choice. I found myself unable to get out of the car in the work car park. The cat is out of the bag so to speak as my boss and collegues now know about the anxiety and depression.
I'm afraid I dont have any answers for you as I have never had a relapse like this is 25 years.
I hope things improve for you.

[Woodpigeon]

Thanks for your kind words all x

[Woodpigeon]

Managed to get a doctors appointment this morning, had been feeling dread to the pit of my stomach over the weeeknd & my heart was racing this morning.

He’s signed me off for a couple of weeks - hopefully this will allow me to clear my head and properly start the recovery.

[Jennifer@kilden]

And soon your meds will start working- before you no it you'll be feeling good again.
As will I!!
It's a tough battle - but we have to just persevere and keep plodding away- 2 weeks off will be really good - even if you just take the time to relax - take some long walks in the fresh air, watch some movies , do a puzzle - Ido colouring in x
Take it easy and you'll improve- 1 day at a time x

[kelly135]

It's so disheartening when you've gone through a long period of feeling well and then it all starts again. It's a frightening reminder that this is a chronic illness that we don't have control over. I'm getting tired of just doing the best I can and doing everything I'm supposed to - all the appointments, taking medication, watching out for stressors, etc. I'm at a point now where I feel like I'm being punished because I just can't catch a break.

[Mindprison]

Your circumstances are familiar to me woodpigeon. I was mostly anxiety free for 8 years and ended up relapsing into Health Anxiety this time last year after some severe work related problems that ended up in court.

I left of course, but the damage was already done by then.

I'm still trying to get myself back on track, so don't feel like you're never going to get there again. It passed once so it will again.

I've been doing mindfulness with a therapist since November, it's slow going but it's been helpful. I wouldn't say i'm close to the end now, but i'm doing the best I can and that's all anyone can ask for.

Once your meds kick in, you'll be in a much better position to deal with this. And there's always more support available via your GP if you feel you need it. You're making some good first steps here, keep it up!

[LeStrawb]

I think I have just found my people.

I have just given myself a relapse by worrying about a relapse.

Being ill for a few weeks with the horrible virus that is going around caused me to worry about what it was, or going to become. I felt the anxiety rise which then brought back the sensations and memories of my meltdown three years ago. I got myself into a state about that and am now relapsing. Anxiety about anxiety, which I understand isn’t uncommon.

While I dearly wish none of us felt like this, it is somewhat reassuring to know I am not alone.