Going on Motorway next week

[panicdiva]

Here we go again. Going on holiday with family from Scotland to England (centreparcs). So,for me it's a double wammy. Motorway & going far away from home. However, to be fair, I have been much better since last yr I went for hypnotherapy & Reiki for driving to Manchester & then flying to Florida. This past year, has been my best year so far since having PD.

Please don't think I'm being weird, but I have not been experiencing the usual terrible dread in the pit of my stomach, & this worries me a little because I'm thinking, when will it hit me? I'm not jumping up & down for joy about going on motorway, but I am truly looking forward to our holiday (we do love going to CentreParcs). I'm all prepared, I've got my DS lite, my MP3, & will stock up on mags - poor hubby is left to do all the driving as I still have not conquered that fear - me driving on motorway.

DH has promised we will leave at 6:00 am so as to try & miss bad traffic (we leave on Monday).

Usually when the kids start talking about it I feel sick inside, thinking can I do this. I really have not felt like this which is great, but a nagging voice keeps saying to me, just you wait, it will come!!!!

What I am trying to ask everyone is this: can panic & agorphobia really go away? Or am I just fooling myself? am I just setting myself up for a big dissy?

[PUGLETMUM]

hi panicdiva,

the answer is that YES panic can go away, but the bad news is that it cant go away by you hoping it to go away!!!

you go on your holiday regardless of whether you have a panic attack not in the fear that you will. you may have one but you will cope with it and it wont last long. the only way to get rid of the fear is to FACE the fear, and then use all your distraction tecniques to deal with it even just sit and take it!! (scary i know) and then just carry on your way without watching and waiting for the next one(also harder said than done), this attitude change will brinng results for you. you accept the possibility of having one because otherwise you are tensing and waiting and watching and we know that this is when the anxiety starts.

just keep telling yourself all the positive things you know about panic
1) it is just too much adrenaline in your body, you are experiencing the fight or flight effect
2) there is the flip side to this - the calming response, through deep breathing and muscle realxation and visualisation, you stop the fight or flight symptoms, but you have to give it time!
3)you will not die,go crazy or embarass yourself as a result of a panic attack you will just feel uncomfortable
4)they dont last very long if you just sit and wait it out, but being frightened of one happening will give you anxiety, which is a different kettle of fish and is probably worse than just the short actual panic attack

anyway i hope some of this helps and you have a wonderful time and dont let the odd panic ruin it for you!

all my best

emma

[domino]

Oh panicdiva, sooo can relate to this , just 2wks ago went to centreparcs at elvedon in suffock, just like you dreaded the journey,but you know what i did it , had a fab time to , i take it you are going to whinfell forest,it,s lovely ,infact they are allvery nice our fav is longleat in whitshire. have a great time , you can beat this . :hugs:

[panicdiva]

Hi thanks for replies. No, we are going to Sherwood Forest. We like Whinfell, as it is only 2hrs away, but we prefer Sherwood, it is our favourite, although it is a 5hr drive. Will keep all your advice in mind, thanks.

[Lindalou64]

sounds like you will have a great time panicdiva,yes panic can subside...i think its hearing it like ya say whats makin you anxious....i know that feeling.....i wish you the best and im sure you will have a great time and be so happy that you did it once youve done it......Linda

[darkangel]

Hi Panicdiva
Good to hear from you again.
You know you can do this, you went to Florida last year and had a fab time. So 5 hours drive to Centre parcs is so achievable and can be done in a relaxed and calm way. The same techniques can be used on the car journey that you used on the flight. Try and "be in the moment", look around at the surrounding countryside and take particular notice of the colours of the trees and the clouds and really escape into it.
Im just back from Bulgaria and this is how I coped on the flight, looked out the window and focussed on the patterns the clouds were making - bit strange maybe but it worked for me. Again everytime you catch yourself saying negative thought, say stop to yourself and keep repeating "I am well and Im on an exciting adventure" and breathe through it.
Keep us posted and Im sure you will be great hun.

Darkangel x

[panicdiva]

Hi Darkangel,

Nice to hear from you too. Thanks for the great advice. That is great news that you went to Bulgaria and managed to get thru the flight with that technique. Well done. Are you still doing your counselling course? How is it going?

[darkangel]

Hi panicdiva

I didnt manage to complete the counselling course - to be honest I dont think im in the right position mentally, to be able to do the course justice. It brought up so many difficulties for me, but I realised that it just wasnt for me, not that I failed so that is a positive. However, I am starting a wee job tomorrow, its 3 hours a week doing admin work for a support worker with a local mental health organisation. Ive done some voluntary work with them in the past so I know the place and the people. Im looking forward to it albeit a little apprehensive but it will be good to receive a pay packet (even though it only 3 hrs lol).

Bulgaria was a challenge as it was a fortnight away abroad and with a new partner. However, we did have a great time and he has helped me face my fears and actually very supportive and caring at the same time. So life is looking up and although anxiety and panic are still there, Im challenging the thoughts much more and just getting on with it.

It would be good to keep in touch and I know you will enjoy your holiday and you will be so chuffed with yourself.

Take care and have a great time

Darkangel x:flowers:

[Daisy_chains]

Hey sweetie!

Well done for planning to go on the motorway, that in itself is a big step! :D

This phobia CAN go away. I have suffered from this for as long as i can remember, and i have found that the more i do the things i dread the most, the better i feel the next time round. I have also found thinking about what may happen, what could happen, and what IS happening in my head/body/mind is the worst thing you can do. Try concentrating on what you will have achieved, and what you plan to go on yoru holiday when you get there, rather than the irrational side of the fears.....honestly, keep pushing your fears and you will be well on your way to recovery! Im living proof.

Good luck!

:flowers:
Daisy x

[panicdiva]

Hi Daisy, thanks for your reply,

I do keep doing somethings but going on the motorway never seems to get easier. However, if I really stop & look back I can see that it is getting easier (just impatient & want it to go away altogether). For instance, when I was really bad, about 6yrs ago, we went to Richmond for a 2wk holiday. Now, before we went I was literally ill for a good month before it, just thinking about going. The stress of worrying about being on that motorway literally wore me down. It wore me down soooo much, that I remember just wishing that I could die. I remember thinking everyone would be so much better without me because they could go on holiday without their wife, mother, being a total wreck for weeks before it. I remember looking at people & feeling envious because they were not going on holiday!!!! The fear & dread was so bad, iIt was like I was going into hospital to have major surgery instead of going on holiday!!!!

Of course there are zillions of other times that I was really ill about going on holiday either by motorway or plane. So, in comparison to how I felt in the past, I am not anywhere as close to as bad as that. So, even though I still feel some anxiety, I realise deep down, that this is an improvement compared to what I have been like. So, things are improving, & I must be getting better at handling my anxiety. It's the impatient side of me that thinks that after 9 yrs of this I should be completely back to the way I was b4 this, where I loved going on holiday no matter what the transport & did not get panic attacks.

However, recently I remembered what I was like when going on holiday with my parents when I was younger. We lived in Canada, so mostly we drove to America & had holidays there, apart from sometimes coming here to Scotland to visit family. I used to get so excited that I literally made myself ill. I remember for about a wk before we went the only thing I could eat was dry bread sandwiches with bolony in it. It was the only thing my stomach could handle. I don't remember feeling fear, I just remember getting so hyphed up that I could barely, sleep, eat, or function. I was like that at xmas time too. Sometimes I would actually throw up the excitement got so bad. Do you think that there is a connection? even though I don't remember feeling fear?
What do you think?