My husband has anxiety

[rhk2018]

Hi! I a do not have anxiety, however my husband of 13 years does and so does my 9 year old son. We have put a great team in place to help my son and I am confident as he gets older he will continue to get the support and develop the tools that he needs to be a happy young man.

Unfortunately, my husband and I have been separated for the past 4 months. A large reason why we are separated is due to his anxiety which he has yet to treat. In many ways his anxiety is the 3rd person in our relationship. His anxiety manifests as a mixture of OCD, compartmentalizing his life and a very large emotional wall that I have been trying to break down since we said "I do." Fortunately/unfortunately I am a people pleaser, and had a lower self-esteem than I would like to admit to, so I continually did what I could to keep my husband happy. He was so emotionally removed that for many years now I have been trying to prove to him that I am worthy of his love. More times than not I have felt lonely due to his rejection of my advances.
After some therapy and the revelation that he was having an emotional affair with his close friend from childhood, I finally built up myself enough to tell him enough was enough, hence the separation.
I am glad to say that through this separation and a lot of couples therapy, my husband has admitted that he should get help for his anxiety as that is playing a huge role in his emotional availability. He has gone to an incredible psychiatrist and has a prescription for Prozac that he has yet to fill. I am very proud of him for taking this step and pray that he takes the Prozac and the it helps him as I believe his life will be so much more fulfilling with his anxiety under control.
That said, I feel like this awful human being that now that he is at the point of potentially getting his anxiety under control, I am so emotionally exhausted and so much damage has been done, that I just don't know if I can keep doing this anymore.
If there is anyone out there that has gone through this and can provide some guidance I would so welcome it. Thank you!

[venusbluejeans]

Hiya rhk2018 and welcome to NMP :welcome:

Why not take a look at our articles on our home page, they contain a wealth of information and are a great starting place for your time on the forum.

I hope you find the as site helpful and informative as I have and that you get the help and support you need here and hope that you meet a few friends along the way :yesyes:

[fduop]

Morning rhk2018,

I suffer from panic, anxiety, and depression; so in a way I've been where your husband is at. I was diagnosed 20 years ago, and I get his feelings of emotional bankruptcy. For me my saving grace was the need to support my family, because our children were very young at the time. So despite my situation, I had to step up.

From what you have said he seems to be taking steps to get help. My advice would be, you have a child so your first priority is to you and him. I will not pretend to know the outcome of you or your husbands future relationship. What I will say is focus on yourself and your son, your husband has his own journey to walk. You what you can do for him, just remember where your priorities lay first.

My one piece of advice for your husband is hopefully he was advised that Prozac (Fluoxetine) takes a week or two to work into your system. There are some helps in this forum that get into the specifics. I know, I was prescribed Flouxetine for over 5 years ago and I tolerate it well. I hope this helps. Best to you and your family rhk2018.

[rhk2018]

Thank you fduop! I appreciate you taking the time to read my post and your thoughtful response

[fduop]

We all need support. Best to you and your family.