View Full Version : How to stop checking stools vigorously? OCD
I have been having a hard time to stop checking my stools I check them at work, at home and at friends houses. It’s on my mind 24/7 then my mind focuses on me having melanoma on my foot. It’s a vicious cycle that I am in and I’ve just been getting so tired of it. How do I stop checking and live my life and be happy. I’m 22 people my age are out living their lives while I stay home and obesess over my body and stools. Can anyone give me tips on how to stop checking ?
I have been having a hard time to stop checking my stools I check them at work, at home and at friends houses. It’s on my mind 24/7 then my mind focuses on me having melanoma on my foot. It’s a vicious cycle that I am in and I’ve just been getting so tired of it. How do I stop checking and live my life and be happy. I’m 22 people my age are out living their lives while I stay home and obesess over my body and stools. Can anyone give me tips on how to stop checking ?
Reach around and flush before you get up :whistles:
Positive thoughts
Exactly what Fishmanpa said. You just have to stop, it's up to you
Exactly what Fishmanpa said. You just have to stop, it's up to you
Unfortunately it's not that easy! My therapist doesn't recommend just stopping completely but trying to cut down gradually.
ankietyjoe
21-02-18, 10:25
Unfortunately it's not that easy! My therapist doesn't recommend just stopping completely but trying to cut down gradually.
I think your therapist is wrong.
Flush, walk away.
You're not coming off heroin.
I think your therapist is wrong.
Flush, walk away.
You're not coming off heroin.
Yes I agree. How do you do this gradually anyway?
Yes I agree. How do you do this gradually anyway?
Cut down, maybe check every second day and gradually decrease the amount of times you check. I was told that stopping completely can cause increased anxiety. It's an ocd behaviour which is closely linked to health anxiety.
Cut down, maybe check every second day and gradually decrease the amount of times you check. I was told that stopping completely can cause increased anxiety. It's an ocd behaviour which is closely linked to health anxiety.
Yes it will increase anxiety but it's far harder to cut down and give yourself options to check. Have you managed to do this, Rainbow?
bertsquall
21-02-18, 14:20
Cut down, maybe check every second day and gradually decrease the amount of times you check. I was told that stopping completely can cause increased anxiety. It's an ocd behaviour which is closely linked to health anxiety.
For me its the what If's that are hard to combat. I did cut looking overall but the hardest part of this for me is keeping the what if there is something i missed, what if it was pencil thin, what if there was a tarry like movement etc
I stopped looking at the stool movements and it has helped greatly so far. If i was to put it into percentages it was like 60-70% analyzing and worrying when i was looking all the time compared to now which is like 90% happy free thoughts and 10% i call the what if thoughts.
It really is an odd behavior that has caused a lot of distress even though the logical thing is there is nothing wrong!
I'm definitely not as bad as I was but unfortunately i'm still struggling with the anxiety. My daughter has severe ocd and my therapist told me that you wouldn't ask anyone with ocd to suddenly stop checking windows, washing hands etc but would ask them to cut back on the amount of times. This is just the same.
When I posted on here last year about stopping checking I was advised by a number of people to lessen the amount of times I checked.
I think if you have been investigated for bowel problems and all is ok then you have to "flush and go"-no exceptions. How can you choose which bowel movement to check and which one to flush immediately?
I think you would feel liberated by going cold turkey on this. It would be hell to begin with but think of the distress you are experiencing now? How long does your therapist expect this cutting down process will take?
I haven't been investigated for bowel problems as my symptoms have pretty much settled down but my mind is still causing me problems.
I'm not sure how long the process will take and unfortunately I only see my therapist monthly which really is'nt often enough so my recovery is going to take quite a while.
I know how difficult it is with OCD. Both my daughter and I are affected by it greatly. We make our own "rules" up which aren't necessarily what the book says but I think it's what works for you, if anything.
Once a month is hardly enough, Rainbow. Is there any chance you could get weekly appointments, just to keep the continuity and encouragement for improvement? Very hard for you to make progress and keep that progress going.
Sorry to hear you both have ocd, my daughter has severe ocd which causes massive anxiety for her.
I really don't think there's any chance of weekly appointments, every time i'm there she tells me if there's a cancellation she get me in sooner, it never happens. I agree that I don't think this is helping at all and I need to be seen more frequently but it's just not going to happen.
MyNameIsTerry
22-02-18, 07:52
I'm definitely not as bad as I was but unfortunately i'm still struggling with the anxiety. My daughter has severe ocd and my therapist told me that you wouldn't ask anyone with ocd to suddenly stop checking windows, washing hands etc but would ask them to cut back on the amount of times. This is just the same.
When I posted on here last year about stopping checking I was advised by a number of people to lessen the amount of times I checked.
It's part of CBT, the ERP component. Based on Pavlovian Extinction. You learn to tolerate the anxiety.
The old methods like stopping completely/confronting the worst fear, known as "flooding", aren't as successful.
NICE & the NHS will use ERP because it's based on clinical evidence.
If you can stop cold turkey, great, but many can't. I couldn't. Some things that don't bother you as much, you may just stop, but something that is massive to you can be too overwhelming therefore you work on smaller goals to get to the end result.
And they need to get to the root of the anxiety. It's not flushing, it's the core belief stuff underneath, but removing compulsions will start giving back more power over your choices.
I'm sorry you can't be seen more regularly, Rainbow. It can't be easy trying to do this with very infrequent therapy sessions and living with the fear of missing something on the occasions that you don't check.
I've only ever had success with an all or nothing approach with certain issues but with others I can't even go there. I couldn't do a gradual approach but that's just me! I realise that I go against NICE guidelines!
I don't feel like the therapy is doing me any good whatsoever and have thought about giving up on it. Also, my therapist is really nice but we seem to be talking over the same things each time I go, I don't really feel i'm making any progress. I was doing much better when I was seeing my art therapist.
I'm completely obsessed about my bowel movements and still sometimes have looser stools when i'm obsessing. I still struggle to go into town as I tend to associate it with having an upset stomach. I manage to work and feel a lot better when i'm there but when i'm at home I tend to go back and forward to the bathroom at the slightest little twinge. I honestly feel i'm never going to get back to the old me :weep::weep:
Home is often where all the OCD habits and rituals happen and are at their most distressing. Do you find you have to check your stools at work or does this just happen at home?
I tend not to go anywhere but at home, although there have been the odd ocassion and I will look closely at the tp. I dont check my stools as thoroughly as I used to just a quick look in the toilet and a close look at the tp.
When I went through the same thing about 7 years ago I was still obsessing over my stools after about 14 months and at some point I just seemed to stop. This has been going on for a year and a half and it seems to be lodged firmly in my brain. So fed up with this.
There may come a point where you just think "enough's enough" and end this nightmare once and for all without therapy or anything. I believe we all overthink anxiety too much and give it too much "power". There's so much focus on mental health and therapy now but we also do have it in us to help ourselves but don't have the confidence to follow it through.
I expect you have a lot of sustained stress in your life as I do? The mind can latch on to allsorts as a response to distress and anxiety. I need to keep myself well as a carer for my daughter who also has autism hence my own HA. It would be wonderful to feel liberated!
I honestly do sometimes think "ok, i'm done with this" but something's stopping me from getting past this. I think because i've lived all my life with anxiety that I don't how else to be.
I have a lot of "magical thinking" and I have a lot of safety behaviours. I know logically that doing this or that won't stop bad things happening but that's not enough to stop me. I work on checkouts in asda and lately i've been refusing to go on checkout 13! I've explained to some of my colleagues why I can't but i'm sure they think i'm crazy. I also salute a single magpie if I see one, think i'm finally losing the plot!
I'm sorry that you and your daughter both suffer from ocd, its a nightmare. You always seem very level headed when you post, I admire you for that.
How about getting one of those toilet blue discs for your cistern at home?
That way you will not be able to check for at least part of the day.
Make it an agreement with yourself, while at home wipe, flush and walk away.
How about getting one of those toilet blue discs for your cistern at home?
That way you will not be able to check for at least part of the day.
Make it an agreement with yourself, while at home wipe, flush and walk away.
I could try that but I think I would still be able to see the contents of the toilet. It's the wiping part that stresses me the most as I obviously have to check the tp.
I'm also stressing about frequency too, this morning i've been three times and my anxiety is pretty high, the more anxious I become the more I focus on my bowels, the more I need to go. Before this all started I barely paid attention to my bm's even though i've had ibs for over 28 years. The fact that i'm 51 plays on my mind and to me its like a definite that i'm going to get cancer of some sort. I'm mentally drained with all of this.
How about getting one of those toilet blue discs for your cistern at home?
That way you will not be able to check for at least part of the day.
Make it an agreement with yourself, while at home wipe, flush and walk away.
That's a great idea. The wife and use them. It helps keep things clean too. The only negative is it might encourage some to physically examine as you can't see much due to the color.
The other thing is what I said earlier.... A "courtesy flush". Before you get up, reach around and flush. You'll still be able to see what's on the paper but it's better than nothing.
Positive thoughts and poo threads
I could try that but I think I would still be able to see the contents of the toilet. It's the wiping part that stresses me the most as I obviously have to check the tp.
I'm also stressing about frequency too, this morning i've been three times and my anxiety is pretty high, the more anxious I become the more I focus on my bowels, the more I need to go. Before this all started I barely paid attention to my bm's even though i've had ibs for over 28 years. The fact that i'm 51 plays on my mind and to me its like a definite that i'm going to get cancer of some sort. I'm mentally drained with all of this.
Why are you definitely going to get cancer though?
That's a great idea. The wife and use them. It helps keep things clean too. The only negative is it might encourage some to physically examine as you can't see much due to the color.
The other thing is what I said earlier.... A "courtesy flush". Before you get up, reach around and flush. You'll still be able to see what's on the paper but it's better than nothing.
Positive thoughts and poo threads
Tbh looking at the paper is what causes me the most anxiety!
---------- Post added at 14:59 ---------- Previous post was at 14:54 ----------
Why are you definitely going to get cancer though?
I don't know why I think this but I just feel that I wont be lucky enough not to get it. Nothing really makes any sense anymore. I'm a pessimist, my dad always used to say that to me.i've never been one of these people that think "it'll never happen to me" I feel sure that it will.
Maybe try and aim for something in between those 2 extremes? You probably feel that cancer will get you sooner or later though? You won't escape because you know it is inevitable? Do you have any hereditary factors re cancer of any type? Is it BC you fear the most?
Maybe try and aim for something in between those 2 extremes? You probably feel that cancer will get you sooner or later though? You won't escape because you know it is inevitable? Do you have any hereditary factors re cancer of any type? Is it BC you fear the most?
Not sure what you mean aiming for something in between the 2 extremes. Yeah I do think I will get cancer of some kind just because 1 in 2 people will get cancer in their lifetime. My aunt on my dad's side died of breast cancer and my uncle on my mum's side died of lung cancer at rhe age of 32. He was a heavy smoker and drinker. Other than that I don't know of any others.
I have had spells of worrying about other cancers but bc keeps coming back up, this is the third time in 14 years that i've been convinced that I have bc. Because I have ibs it makes me worry when it plays up, and it plays up when i'm stressed and anxious.
Not sure what you mean aiming for something in between the 2 extremes. Yeah I do think I will get cancer of some kind just because 1 in 2 people will get cancer in their lifetime. My aunt on my dad's side died of breast cancer and my uncle on my mum's side died of lung cancer at rhe age of 32. He was a heavy smoker and drinker. Other than that I don't know of any others.
I have had spells of worrying about other cancers but bc keeps coming back up, this is the third time in 14 years that i've been convinced that I have bc. Because I have ibs it makes me worry when it plays up, and it plays up when i'm stressed and anxious.
I meant acknowledging that you could get cancer but then again you might not and it's certainly not inevitable. With the scrutiny we put ourselves under we are going to pick up on any potential red flag symptoms straightaway so give ourselves the best possible chance of a cure.
I meant acknowledging that you could get cancer but then again you might not and it's certainly not inevitable. With the scrutiny we put ourselves under we are going to pick up on any potential red flag symptoms straightaway so give ourselves the best possible chance of a cure.
It just seems inevitable, i'm not a very lucky person so I feel that it's my fate. My phobia of drs is a problem though, i'd have to be having a pretty major symptom to force me to go to the doctor. Also a lot of cancers have very subtle symptoms that might go unnoticed.
I'm terrified of my body, I can't get away from that.
It just seems inevitable, i'm not a very lucky person so I feel that it's my fate.
Can you tell me next week's lottery numbers while you're predicting the future?
There's no such thing as luck. The universe doesn't care about you, or anyone else. There are no supernatural forces deciding some people will have good things happen to them, and some people won't. Bad things that have happened to you in the past happened due to chance, not because the universe has decided you're doomed to be a victim.
You have as much or as little chance as anyone of getting cancer. Whatever the latest figure is for lifetime instances, the majority of cancers are in the elderly, and... well... we all have to go of something. The chance of a young or middle-aged person getting cancer is significantly lower.
While you're living your life deciding you're going to have cancer and worrying unduly about it, you're wasting your life if you're in the 50% or 60% or whatever it is of people who won't.
Can you tell me next week's lottery numbers while you're predicting the future?
There's no such thing as luck. The universe doesn't care about you, or anyone else. There are no supernatural forces deciding some people will have good things happen to them, and some people won't. Bad things that have happened to you in the past happened due to chance, not because the universe has decided you're doomed to be a victim.
You have as much or as little chance as anyone of getting cancer. Whatever the latest figure is for lifetime instances, the majority of cancers are in the elderly, and... well... we all have to go of something. The chance of a young or middle-aged person getting cancer is significantly lower.
While you're living your life deciding you're going to have cancer and worrying unduly about it, you're wasting your life if you're in the 50% or 60% or whatever it is of people who won't.
I think your post is a little harsh!
Of course I know that all my thoughts are irrational i'm not stupid!.i'm trying to get better with cbt.
I didn't mean to be unduly harsh, just intended a bit of a logic kick. We're all here because our anxiety drifts us to illogical places.
Dwelling on being an unlucky person and allowing yourself to label yourself in that way is what I was getting at. I wasn't trying to say you were stupid, genuine apologies if it came over that way. Reading it back I could have worded things better.
Good luck with the CBT.
Hmm TBH rainbow 17 months has gone by and very little improvement and you did start a very similar thread way back in 2016 so go figure either sit on your symptoms or get help I see you are having CBT I hope it's helping some what :)
Hmm TBH rainbow 17 months has gone by and very little improvement and you did start a very similar thread way back in 2016 so go figure either sit on your symptoms or get help I see you are having CBT I hope it's helping some what :)
I am getting help, i'm seeing a therapist! I didn't start this thread, I just commented on it.
I am getting help, i'm seeing a therapist! I didn't start this thread, I just commented on it. Ok my mistake apologise for this :) Glad you are getting therapy is it helping you?
Ok my mistake apologise for this :) Glad you are getting therapy is it helping you?
Its not really helping as I only see my therapist once a month which isn't enough.
Its not really helping as I only see my therapist once a month which isn't enough. That's terrible rainbow quite agree once a month will not achieve anything:ohmy: Could you try a charity like mind as they do counselling. I cant even get counselling for my problem (OCD based) these MH services are a rabbit warren and sometimes you end up in the wrong hole :eek: I wish you well ATB
It’s been two months and a day hasn’t gone by where i haven’t checked my stool. My new obsession is the shapes and size of stool. I actually don’t even know what’s “normal for me” as I never used to observe my stool. I have been taking ocd medication but it takes 4-5 weeks to kick in. I’m at work and I check my stool. I’m really worried about the lengths I’ve reached with this obsession. Passing stool now has turned into a anxiety attack as I think I wonder what stool I will get today? Will there be blood perhaps? It’s all one big compulsion to me but I pray for better days for all of us ❤️❤️
Having and examining a poo causes a panic attack. Having a poo and not examining it will cause a panic attack. With the latter option comes a small victory wouldn't you say?
Having and examining a poo causes a panic attack. Having a poo and not examining it will cause a panic attack. With the latter option comes a small victory wouldn't you say? Absolutely 100% :) ATB
Having and examining a poo causes a panic attack. Having a poo and not examining it will cause a panic attack. With the latter option comes a small victory wouldn't you say?
Thanks for that. Going to go with the latter.
Yay I insist you do that. Have a poo, flush, go and make yourself a cuppa and pat yourself on the back :)
Oh boy is this my life right now. All of these behaviors for me are linked to childhood trauma and abuse. Worrying and using health anxiety was a way for me to self protect. I only just recently learned this in therapy. I’ve been in therapy for about a year and a half. It has saved my life. I don’t want to give the illusion it has cured me as it has not cured me, but it has given me new coping strategies to implement during my episodes. Currently I’m going through an episode of poo worries. I concentrate 100% on my bowels, what they look like, what color are they, why is my stool not, Formed Why is it mushy? Literally having to poo is starting to give me severe anxiety which makes my stomach issues worse. I finally broke downs and saw my gastro and she took a bunch of stool samples and now I get to wait panicking until I get those results. You can flush and walk away if you’re not having any issues. As hard as it is, you can do it. Start with once in the morning. And then gradually cut that out. I wish you the best
Oh boy is this my life right now. All of these behaviors for me are linked to childhood trauma and abuse. Worrying and using health anxiety was a way for me to self protect. I only just recently learned this in therapy. I’ve been in therapy for about a year and a half. It has saved my life. I don’t want to give the illusion it has cured me as it has not cured me, but it has given me new coping strategies to implement during my episodes. Currently I’m going through an episode of poo worries. I concentrate 100% on my bowels, what they look like, what color are they, why is my stool not, Formed Why is it mushy? Literally having to poo is starting to give me severe anxiety which makes my stomach issues worse. I finally broke downs and saw my gastro and she took a bunch of stool samples and now I get to wait panicking until I get those results. You can flush and walk away if you’re not having any issues. As hard as it is, you can do it. Start with once in the morning. And then gradually cut that out. I wish you the best
Hey there, I haven’t tried therapy yet but I know how you feel , i examine mine all the time. We will get through this though don’t worry,❤️❤️ Anxiety does make you go toliet more and dirrehea happens. Take care.x
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