View Full Version : Feeling desperate- pancreatic cancer
My health anxiety has reached ridiculous levels and I don’t know where to turn. Recently I have been plagued by strange there-not-there abdominal pains, which move about. I also have all-over-the-place bowel habits and yellowish stools. I’m petrified of pancreatic cancer, but I’m SO entrenched in a health anxiety disorder I don’t know where to turn for help. My GP - who is familiar with me! - would not give pancreatic cancer a second thought. I could pay for a private CT scan - bypassing the GP - but I have had SO many tests and scans recently (for multiple perceived cancers) that I feel like my head might explode.
Feeling defeated. (Im 41 and female btw)
WiseMonkey
01-03-18, 07:52
Hi,
Yellowish stools can be produced by stools that exit very quickly through the digestive system as in IBS or anxiety. Also if your urine is a usual colour, clear, yellow or greenish this is normal too.
There is a specific blood test that measures pancreatic function, so this may be helpful. My Dr told me that PC is rare and that she's never seen a case in 25 years of practice.
Your Dr would know at a glance if you had PC, which you haven't. Trust him/her.
Thank you SO much for replying. It really helps. I know it is unlikely- but I find it so hard to be rational - because it’s POSSIBLE!
Although I’m having CBT at the moment I feel as if my HA is quite out of control
Yes it is possible. It's also possible that you won't survive the day but we are all in this position. No-one in the world can be absolutely certain that they will survive the day.
If your GP isn't giving PC a second thought then I would strongly advise against you chasing a PC diagnosis and exposing yourself to unnecessary radiation. Use the money to prolong your therapy instead?
Yes it is possible. It's also possible that you won't survive the day but we are all in this position. No-one in the world can be absolutely certain that they will survive the day.
If your GP isn't giving PC a second thought then I would strongly advise against you chasing a PC diagnosis and exposing yourself to unnecessary radiation. Use the money to prolong your therapy instead?
That is a really good idea (although actually my therapy is NHS :blush:). I do have a tendency to rush to get whatever test I think I need because I am so desperate to escape the acute anxiety. But my lovely therapist has advised I allow myself to “sit with” my anxiety and not act on it immediately. When I have done this in the past it has worked. But this pancreatic scare feels SO REAL (as they all do at the time, I suppose)
Thank you so much for replying xx
Do you find reading threads on here makes your HA worse, jojo?
It's not easy to resist the urge to buy private tests to give yourself reassurance but I'm amazed that you can just bypass the GP and get a private CT scan without a GP referral? This really doesn't help anyone with HA get a rational grip on their condition
Yellowish stools can be produced by stools that exit very quickly through the digestive system as in IBS or anxiety.
Yep, 100 percent ! Exactly what I was going to say.
Pulisa has given some great thoughts here, so I dont really want to repeat much. I agree with all she's said though and often want to say to people 'but anything is possible for anyone'....
Do you find reading threads on here makes your HA worse, jojo?
It's not easy to resist the urge to buy private tests to give yourself reassurance but I'm amazed that you can just bypass the GP and get a private CT scan without a GP referral? This really doesn't help anyone with HA get a rational grip on their condition
I find coming on here helps enormously actually. I have tried to avoid starting my own threads recently and instead joining other discussions, but I find the support and the shared experience so sooo valuable (I know that is a contentious view point but I’m sticking with it!!)
Re the CT scans. I know. You can get them without a referral in London. I do think it is a dodgy area as the only people who are going without referrals are the people who probably shouldn’t be having the scans. Also you get a radiologist report - which might say something scary - and you have no dr to discuss it with. It probably shouldn’t be allowed. But it’s a money making business
Blimey. They take your cash and leave you in the lurch. That's a very dodgy business and obviously aimed at cashing in from the "worried well".
I'd only have a test based on actual clinical need. I make that a rule for myself. I don't want unnecessary radiation from CT scans. I would ask for an amylase blood test if I were really concerned about my pancreas - if my GP agreed -and if it was normal I would be satisfied and leave it. If the level was abnormal I would trust my GP to make the best decision re further investigations.
I do have HA (I am a carer for my daughter-she relies on me 100%. I know this is bad) but I have to try to keep to my "rules")
Blimey. They take your cash and leave you in the lurch. That's a very dodgy business and obviously aimed at cashing in from the "worried well".
I'd only have a test based on actual clinical need. I make that a rule for myself. I don't want unnecessary radiation from CT scans. I would ask for an amylase blood test if I were really concerned about my pancreas - if my GP agreed -and if it was normal I would be satisfied and leave it. If the level was abnormal I would trust my GP to make the best decision re further investigations.
I do have HA (I am a carer for my daughter-she relies on me 100%. I know this is bad) but I have to try to keep to my "rules")
I’m sorry to hear about your daughter Pulisa. Is she home full time? Do you have HA regarding yourself or your daughter? (Mine is totally wrapped up in motherhood- the desire to stay alive for those that need me)
Well done on sticking to your rules. Do you mind if I ask what they are?
---------- Post added at 10:36 ---------- Previous post was at 10:34 ----------
Oh I think you say what your rules are. Clinical need. In the fog of HA I find it so difficult to work out what clinical need is!
---------- Post added at 10:40 ---------- Previous post was at 10:36 ----------
Yep, 100 percent ! Exactly what I was going to say.
Pulisa has given some great thoughts here, so I dont really want to repeat much. I agree with all she's said though and often want to say to people 'but anything is possible for anyone'....
Thank you so much Carys. I feel my anxiety subsiding a bit and it is thanks to you guys. I really appreciate it. My family get so fed up with my endless parade of cancers and so I TRY :blush: not to bother them with my “latest”. (High failure rate in that department!!)
I do think I am itching though. Jaundice? Or hyper awareness?? Aaaaa! I HATE this!!!
Thank you so much again for taking the time to reply :hugs:
Itching, very very dry cold weather, simples. I have it terribly all over my body, once its sub zero my skin flakes off and I itch and scratch.
Itching, very very dry cold weather, simples. I have it terribly all over my body, once its sub zero my skin flakes off and I itch and scratch.
Yes. Yes I should know that! Also have had the itching obsession before. Thinking about itching begets itching.
I asked my vet brother if I looked jaundiced this morning and he said:
“Gosh yes. I think it’s probably terminal”.
Which is usually what I get from my (highly medical) family
I’m sorry to hear about your daughter Pulisa. Is she home full time? Do you have HA regarding yourself or your daughter? (Mine is totally wrapped up in motherhood- the desire to stay alive for those that need me)
Well done on sticking to your rules. Do you mind if I ask what they are?
---------- Post added at 10:36 ---------- Previous post was at 10:34 ----------
Oh I think you say what your rules are. Clinical need. In the fog of HA I find it so difficult to work out what clinical need is!
---------- Post added at 10:40 ---------- Previous post was at 10:36 ----------
Thank you so much Carys. I feel my anxiety subsiding a bit and it is thanks to you guys. I really appreciate it. My family get so fed up with my endless parade of cancers and so I TRY :blush: not to bother them with my “latest”. (High failure rate in that department!!)
I do think I am itching though. Jaundice? Or hyper awareness?? Aaaaa! I HATE this!!!
Thank you so much again for taking the time to reply :hugs:
The thing is it's not up to you to work out "clinical need". Your GP has the skills and training do that.
Mind you, coming from a "medical" family it's not surprising that you have HA. I really feel for you-it can't be easy trying not to ask questions or trying to get reassurance from them. Your brother as a vet is probably the best qualified of all to make a human diagnosis though!:D All those years of training!
The thing is it's not up to you to work out "clinical need". Your GP has the skills and training do that.
Mind you, coming from a "medical" family it's not surprising that you have HA. I really feel for you-it can't be easy trying not to ask questions or trying to get reassurance from them. Your brother as a vet is probably the best qualified of all to make a human diagnosis though!:D All those years of training!
Yes indeed... I have vets and doctors in my immediate family. I think my head could be hanging off though and they’d just say “stop imagining things!”
But you are right. My GP is the one to judge. I will try to “sit with” my anxiety for a while first - as my therapist suggests - to see if I really feel the need to see the GP. (Getting an appointment takes weeks though!!)
Make an appointment for 4 weeks time with your GP (routine) and see if you can "sit" on your anxiety until then. If you can and your symptoms lessen then maybe you could cancel it but I realise this may be too big a step to take at the moment? Maybe your therapist could support you whilst you wait?
Make an appointment for 4 weeks time with your GP (routine) and see if you can "sit" on your anxiety until then. If you can and your symptoms lessen then maybe you could cancel it but I realise this may be too big a step to take at the moment? Maybe your therapist could support you whilst you wait?
That is a great suggestion and exactly what I’ll do. I did the same thing a couple of weeks ago when I was in a panic about a lymph node. In the end I didn’t need to go! But it’s HARD!!!!
I know. All those little doubts as to whether you are doing the right thing etc..I'm doing the same thing at the moment but am determined to see it through.
I know. All those little doubts as to whether you are doing the right thing etc..I'm doing the same thing at the moment but am determined to see it through.
Oh poor you! And yet here you are, taking the time to help others. I hope it works out for you.... xxx
And now I’m losing weight!! I’ve lost 4lb in less than a week and I’m REALLY struggling to bare this anxiety. I want to rush to the GP today.
But I know what they’ll say: Anxiety.
In my therapy session last week I was saying how terrified I am of losing weight and how I panic whenever I drop any (in spite of wanting/needing to). It was actually my task for this week to try to lose some weight and not panic. But I didn’t try to lose this weight!!
Unintentional weight loss: red flag symptom.
I’m spiralling
So sorry you are feeling in the grip of your health anxiety Jojo , it’s awful being in that dark place .i myself have gone through so many bouts , including fear of P.c You sound though that you have a good insight in to it though which is brilliant , I agree with the others regarding seeking out tests , it simply doesn’t work to reassure those of us who sufffer from health anxiety , in fact as I think you already know it just locks you further on it , if you are anything like me you will get even more anxious having the the test / scan and have an agonising wait for results , on getting clear results it gives a lovely but momentary feel of thank god for that but it doesn’t last long , we start doubting the tests ( you read a story of someone who’s scan missed it etc) or we just move on to another scary illness ( with the help of doctor google!) . It’s so hard to fight against the urge to seek medical reassurance but if you want to get to a better place with your health anxiety it’s not a good move . Is CBT helping you ? , keep going you can do this ! , big hugs .
Do you eat less when you're anxious? I lost over 3 stone in about 4 months when my anxiety was really bad. This happens to me everytime. Also if you're constantly anxious your body burns more calories.
Do you eat less when you're anxious? I lost over 3 stone in about 4 months when my anxiety was really bad. This happens to me everytime. Also if you're constantly anxious your body burns more calories.
Yes I do. I feel like I can’t stomach anything. Thank you so much for replying. Xxx
I’ve lost loads of weight in the past because of severe anxiety , just couldn’t eat . Your body is on full Adrenalin no wonder with not eating you have lost some wait including weight loss from loss of fluids from food , how’s the cbt going?
So sorry you are feeling in the grip of your health anxiety Jojo , it’s awful being in that dark place .i myself have gone through so many bouts , including fear of P.c You sound though that you have a good insight in to it though which is brilliant , I agree with the others regarding seeking out tests , it simply doesn’t work to reassure those of us who sufffer from health anxiety , in fact as I think you already know it just locks you further on it , if you are anything like me you will get even more anxious having the the test / scan and have an agonising wait for results , on getting clear results it gives a lovely but momentary feel of thank god for that but it doesn’t last long , we start doubting the tests ( you read a story of someone who’s scan missed it etc) or we just move on to another scary illness ( with the help of doctor google!) . It’s so hard to fight against the urge to seek medical reassurance but if you want to get to a better place with your health anxiety it’s not a good move . Is CBT helping you ? , keep going you can do this ! , big hugs .
What an absolutely lovely reply Beatrice- thank you. Everyone is being so lovely it’s bringing tears to my eyes!! I can’t go to the doctor today anyway- too snowy!
I think it's quite normal to lose weight even if you are eating because severe and unrelenting anxiety and probably troubled sleep and loose bowel movements all take their toll on your metabolism and speed it up something rotten!
Take care, jojo. Stay in the warm if you can and be kind to yourself. No googling!!:DBeatrice is so right by urging you to focus on your CBT xx
I think it's quite normal to lose weight even if you are eating because severe and unrelenting anxiety and probably troubled sleep and loose bowel movements all take their toll on your metabolism and speed it up something rotten!
Take care, jojo. Stay in the warm if you can and be kind to yourself. No googling!!:DBeatrice is so right by urging you to focus on your CBT xx
Thank you. I AM trying to be reasonable. I’m not sure what triggered the pancreatic scare but last week I was worried I had ovarian cancer. I’m trying to tell myself I have out of control HA, and it’s just anxiety.... (trying.... not necessarily succeeding!!)
Thank you so much for taking the time to talk me down
Xx
Hi name same :D
Try to wait it out. These things dont sound serious. From what I can tell from reading this board, most things can be caused by anxiety.
Trusting doctors is hard. Coming from someone who has been to see over 10 different types of doctors (I dont have HA, my country just has bad doctors lol), I can really understand thinking they could hace missed something, or not being able to trust your doctor, but pancreatic cancer is very very rare. People lose weight for all sorts of reasons. Congrats on your loss though. I hope youre feeling better soon.
Hellooo
I’ve been really really trying to keep my health anxiety under control, and I have just come to the end of a course of CBT.... and some days I feel almost normal, with the worries just “back ground noise”.
But not in the last week or so. Recently I’ve become increasingly panicky about pancreatic cancer.
Evidence I have it:
1)I have weird pains/sensations in my upper abdomen and mid back
2)I worry I can feel a lump on the left abdomen near my aorta. (I know for a fact a dr would not be able to feel this as you have to feel REALLY hard and in a certain way, such that I can feel my ribs through the other side, if you know what I mean.)
3) pancreatic cancer is really horrible and has been a long time phobia of mine.
Evidence that I don’t have it:
1)I had an ultrasound a few months ago last time I worried about PC that showed nothing (but they often don’t!!)
2)I have similar symptoms every time I worry about PC (which has been several times over the last decade!) and in the past they have always gone when my worries move on (but this time they feel more real)
3)I have thought I detected an abdominal lump years ago after intense searching and doctors never have. I could be feeling too hard/wrong/imagining things (but maybe I’m not...)
4)I’m not losing weight or jaundiced etc (could be early stages)
5)I’m fit (ran a mountain marathon at the weekend :winks:!)(as above...)
But I am REALLY worried. And a bit tearful. What I WANT to do is bypass my doctor and book a private CT scan. But a) im really scared what it will find (don’t want to be diagnosed with terminal cancer at beginning of summer hols) and b) it goes against EVERYTHING i have learned in my CBT
Thank you for reading..... any supportive words would be soooo so appreciated.
Love Jojo xxx
Jojo - did you get any exercises at your CBT to help you rationalise this fear for yourself?
CBT takes practice but the more you use it the easier it will become for you.
Jojo
If this is taking over your life and a ct scan would give a definitive answer then is it not worth it? I know you worry about what it would show but it would be better to know early would it not. Given that the major symptoms like jaundice etc are missing even if you had it it would be likely to be at an early stage. I had a ct scan looking for pancreatic cancer and the consultant said it gives a better picture of small abnormalities than an mri does.
I think it would be worth seriously considering................
Thank you for the replies-
Elen- I am trying, promise! I think that’s why i did the evidence for and against thing. It did help me just to write it down... but the HA brain is irrational, especially when down a rabbit hole!!
Snooper - you are the devil on my shoulder!!! You pretty much articulated what the HA side of my brain is telling me!! BUT although you say yourself it would give me a definitive answer - you didn’t believe the one you got! Another perfect demonstration of the HA brain!
Also- tests are incredibly addictive- I’ve had loads of them in the past.... and I usually end up not believing them OR moving on to another worry.
HOWEVER - I might yet book the scan for the reasons you say. My doctor would NOT approve though!
paranoid-viking
27-06-18, 10:26
Hellooo
I’ve been really really trying to keep my health anxiety under control, and I have just come to the end of a course of CBT.... and some days I feel almost normal, with the worries just “back ground noise”.
But not in the last week or so. Recently I’ve become increasingly panicky about pancreatic cancer.
Evidence I have it:
1)I have weird pains/sensations in my upper abdomen and mid back
2)I worry I can feel a lump on the left abdomen near my aorta. (I know for a fact a dr would not be able to feel this as you have to feel REALLY hard and in a certain way, such that I can feel my ribs through the other side, if you know what I mean.)
3) pancreatic cancer is really horrible and has been a long time phobia of mine.
Evidence that I don’t have it:
1)I had an ultrasound a few months ago last time I worried about PC that showed nothing (but they often don’t!!)
2)I have similar symptoms every time I worry about PC (which has been several times over the last decade!) and in the past they have always gone when my worries move on (but this time they feel more real)
3)I have thought I detected an abdominal lump years ago after intense searching and doctors never have. I could be feeling too hard/wrong/imagining things (but maybe I’m not...)
4)I’m not losing weight or jaundiced etc (could be early stages)
5)I’m fit (ran a mountain marathon at the weekend :winks:!)(as above...)
But I am REALLY worried. And a bit tearful. What I WANT to do is bypass my doctor and book a private CT scan. But a) im really scared what it will find (don’t want to be diagnosed with terminal cancer at beginning of summer hols) and b) it goes against EVERYTHING i have learned in my CBT
Thank you for reading..... any supportive words would be soooo so appreciated.
Love Jojo xxx
I have been through the same worries as you. It started 2 years ago and I was quite frightened at times believing I was not long for this world. I am still here. I wont say the "symptoms" have disapeared but I somehow got used to them and, quiet frankly, if I had had pancreatic cancer all along I would be dead by now or at least seriously, seriously ill. That is what all rationality says abou this illness. But - I dont know if this apply to you - I have noticed that my "symptms" disappear or somehow gets better when I have a probiotic diet; you know; drink a lot of youghurt, eating oatmeal and carrots etc. Maybe a change in diet will do you good too?
Thank you paranoid Viking. How are your worries these days? Are you feeling better?
Jojo,
I'm going through some stomach cancer/pancreatic cancer fears as well at the moment and have an abdominal ultrasound booked for Saturday morning with follow up next Thurs with my GI doc. I've already been to visit him and he didn't seem worried about my symptoms, but they almost always order some type of test "just to make sure" (argh, thanks for adding fuel to the HA fire there).
Anyway - I agree with tests being addictive. No matter what test you get, it won't be enough. I had an abdominal ultrasound last year for another issue and it showed nothing. But of course that doesn't matter now - it's about what I'm feeling NOW and what that may or may not mean.
We can't spend our lives chasing tests - if you've been to the doc and he wasn't worried I would focus on the CBT you've gotten with trying to beat back the feeling that you need to test. OR maybe ask the doctor why he doesn't recommend a test so you understand his thought process.
Jojo, at the risk of being shot down in flames I would say that helping others on here with similar fears isn't helping your own struggle with HA (and in particular PC) one iota.
Is there ever a definitive test for PC and more importantly, one that you would believe as 100% definitive? What would your doctor/therapist say if you had the CT scan? From reading about PC on here I think you'll find that there are even more elaborate specific scans which you could track down if you felt so inclined...but would any scan/test bring you peace of mind for the longterm if you deliberately challenge what you have learned in therapy? And how frustrated would you be when this happened?
Jojo, at the risk of being shot down in flames I would say that helping others on here with similar fears isn't helping your own struggle with HA (and in particular PC) one iota.
Is there ever a definitive test for PC and more importantly, one that you would believe as 100% definitive? What would your doctor/therapist say if you had the CT scan? From reading about PC on here I think you'll find that there are even more elaborate specific scans which you could track down if you felt so inclined...but would any scan/test bring you peace of mind for the longterm if you deliberately challenge what you have learned in therapy? And how frustrated would you be when this happened?
Thank you so much Pulisa,
You are right about all of the above accept the bit about helping others. I believe in peer to peer support, it’s as simple as that. I’ve been on this road for a decade now and I’ve found this site a genuine godsend. Not feeding the dragon help, real help.
But chasing tests - that is dragon food for sure. My therapist has encouraged me to pause before seeking the reassurance of tests. A week maybe, a month, try to push it longer each time.
So no CT scan booked yet.
Thank you though, your reply was very thoughtful
Jojo xx
paranoid-viking
27-06-18, 19:58
Thank you paranoid Viking. How are your worries these days? Are you feeling better?
Well, I have calmed down on the cancer fear. But then again there are other fears as I by nature am being anxious. Fear of the aging, of developing chronic conditions that may be harmfull due to not being the most healthy one.
I believe in peer to peer support too of course and forgive me for making that comment. You always go out of your way to help others-I just didn't want it to be at the expense of your own health.
Sitting on anxiety has always been very difficult for me-I admire your resolve re the CT xx
Jojo, at the risk of being shot down in flames I would say that helping others on here with similar fears isn't helping your own struggle with HA (and in particular PC) one iota.
Is there ever a definitive test for PC and more importantly, one that you would believe as 100% definitive? What would your doctor/therapist say if you had the CT scan? From reading about PC on here I think you'll find that there are even more elaborate specific scans which you could track down if you felt so inclined...but would any scan/test bring you peace of mind for the longterm if you deliberately challenge what you have learned in therapy? And how frustrated would you be when this happened?
Perfectly put Pulisa, and yes peer support is brilliant but not when others are projecting their fears and solutions onto you.
Logically you know that a CAT scan isn't the answer.
You are doing a good job, keep it up.
Thank you Pulisa and Elen. Already my fears have started to move onto a brain tumour, so that suggests (to my rational mind) that I’m just having a spike in my health anxiety. Or maybe I actually have a brain tumour (says my slightly less rational mind!!).
Peer support is imperfect of course...... it is not coming from a trained therapist after all ....but in many ways it is all the better for that!
And yep. Sitting on anxiety sucks! (But it works.::.)
Xx
---------- Post added at 21:51 ---------- Previous post was at 21:46 ----------
Jojo,
I'm going through some stomach cancer/pancreatic cancer fears as well at the moment and have an abdominal ultrasound booked for Saturday morning with follow up next Thurs with my GI doc. I've already been to visit him and he didn't seem worried about my symptoms, but they almost always order some type of test "just to make sure" (argh, thanks for adding fuel to the HA fire there).
Anyway - I agree with tests being addictive. No matter what test you get, it won't be enough. I had an abdominal ultrasound last year for another issue and it showed nothing. But of course that doesn't matter now - it's about what I'm feeling NOW and what that may or may not mean.
We can't spend our lives chasing tests - if you've been to the doc and he wasn't worried I would focus on the CBT you've gotten with trying to beat back the feeling that you need to test. OR maybe ask the doctor why he doesn't recommend a test so you understand his thought process.
Thank you so much for replying ktdid, and I’m sorry you are having similar fears. You seem to have pretty good insight into them though..... you’ll have to hold onto that insight when the ultrasound shows nothing and you want a CT scan!!!!
Hang in there:winks:
And..... today I can feel food moving through my oesophagas in my chest and I think - naturally enough - throat cancer!!!. Clearly I am just a blobby anxiety mess at the moment. I think of myself as rational - I have a masters degree in biological sciences - but clearly I am not. Perhaps that is the problem - I need to get over the idea that I am a rational person!
Thank you for taking the time to reply to me though people - your kindness through the ether means a lot!
You can be a rational person currently having a hell of a battle with HA, jojo. I think anxiety can override rationality at the drop of a hat and it takes all your strength to pull up the drawbridge and try and contain the fears and ruminations as best you can with the skills and techniques you have learned along the way. And sometimes I think it helps just to vent and get it all out and then take a deep breath and try and salvage some rationality which is what you always do xx
And..... today I can feel food moving through my oesophagas in my chest and I think - naturally enough - throat cancer!!!. Clearly I am just a blobby anxiety mess at the moment. I think of myself as rational - I have a masters degree in biological sciences - but clearly I am not. Perhaps that is the problem - I need to get over the idea that I am a rational person!
Thank you for taking the time to reply to me though people - your kindness through the ether means a lot!
I have a Ph.D. and am a total headcase. :wacko:
I've always had high anxiety, my HA started in high school ages ago. My "normal" is probably someone's sensation of being chased by a lion.
I would like to say I'm old enough to have gotten used to it, but it's still very hard especially now that I'm working on changing my thought process. It's not really until you do that you discover how deep the roots of anxiety and "irrationality" can go.
BTW - I am totally rational about most other things besides my health :yesyes:. BUT my HA flares up massively when I have a period of high stress. I think it's my mind's way of dealing with it for some weird reason.
I have a Ph.D. and am a total headcase. :wacko:
I've always had high anxiety, my HA started in high school ages ago. My "normal" is probably someone's sensation of being chased by a lion.
I would like to say I'm old enough to have gotten used to it, but it's still very hard especially now that I'm working on changing my thought process. It's not really until you do that you discover how deep the roots of anxiety and "irrationality" can go.
BTW - I am totally rational about most other things besides my health :yesyes:. BUT my HA flares up massively when I have a period of high stress. I think it's my mind's way of dealing with it for some weird reason.
Well there you go! Education does not make you sensible!! In the last week alone I’ve “had”: thyroid cancer, throat cancer, a brain tumour and pancreatic cancer (twice - and again today). It would be funny, except it’s totally not!
How did your ultrasound go KTdid? Are you feeling any better?
I’m feeling so incredibly desperate and worried about this today. For the last few days I’ve had terrible morning diarrhoea and feel sick to my stomach and have no appetite and I feel in such a panic. This is really happening! Maybe I do actually have pancreatic cancer. I just want to curl up and cry. Please please help if you can. I feel so down and don’t know where to turn because my family (understandably!) get so fed up with my health worries and dismiss them outright.
Thank you!
Jojo x
Hi Jojo,
I'm so sorry to hear you are feeling under the weather :( While I don't personally think it's indicative of PC I can understand how scary it must be when you were already worried about the illness. To me it sounds far more likely you have a bug of some sort, especially with the weather change in the UK, this is always a bad time of year for bugs. I truly believe if you had PC you would be extremely poorly by now (if even here at all) and I really don't think after your positive test results that this is likely at all.
Have you spoke to your doctor to see what they suggest? x
I'm sure if you had PC you would know it by now as you started this thread a few months ago. My Uncle had PC 3 years ago, he lived in Australia and they tried everything and he only lasted 3 months. A friend of mine died this summer of PC and he lasted 6 weeks.
Thank you both so much for replying. BikerMatt; your poor friend and uncle. I know it seems irrational. But of course in my mind my earlier symptoms were the sort of “prelude” symptoms that people sometimes get (I’ve googled!!), and now this is the REAL THING.
This sucks so bad. I haven’t felt this panicked for a while.....
The curse of Dr Google....
The thing is you won't believe anything anybody says on here, will you?
---------- Post added at 18:10 ---------- Previous post was at 18:06 ----------
You say that you've been feeling a bit better and now a spot of diarrhoea/tummy trouble has started a panic..Can you see how PC would not present as something coming and going despite what Dr Google says?
Actually it helps more than you know Pulisa. So may times, in my darkest moments, I have reached out on here and you lovely people have brought me back from the brink.
The long term struggle continues- but the crisis often begins to pass...
Xx
---------- Post added at 18:11 ---------- Previous post was at 18:10 ----------
The curse of Dr Google....
The thing is you won't believe anything anybody says on here, will you?
---------- Post added at 18:10 ---------- Previous post was at 18:06 ----------
You say that you've been feeling a bit better and now a spot of diarrhoea/tummy trouble has started a panic..Can you see how PC would not present as something coming and going despite what Dr Google says?
Thank you. So much.
I honestly think you should nuke Dr Google for the sake of your mental health. All it brings you is panic and terror and crap advice/theories. I know it's a compulsion to Google but it is so detrimental to your fight to manage your HA and it contributes absolutely zilch in terms of positive help.
I honestly think you should nuke Dr Google for the sake of your mental health. All it brings you is panic and terror and crap advice/theories. I know it's a compulsion to Google but it is so detrimental to your fight to manage your HA and it contributes absolutely zilch in terms of positive help.
I totally know. But in moments of panic that counts for nothing :weep::weep::weep:
I totally know. But in moments of panic that counts for nothing :weep::weep::weep:
It's really tough Jojo but ultimately the only person who can stop the googling is you. We KNOW it makes our HA so much worse, the sad reality is googling is the route of most fear because it gives us information on illnesses we wouldn't have known to exist or at least weren't educated enough to associate with our symptoms prior. We would go to the doctor if we felt off, then trust what they said because we didn't know otherwise. Yes some mistakes can still be made this way, but I bet you it's no more than is made now, even with people googling. All that comes from googling is mental anguish and the zapping of life quality. I say this with experience.
If being tough with yourself doesn't work can you find a positive reinforcement to not google? I'm not sure what would suit you but for example something like for every day you don't google you will put £1 into a pot and by the end of the week/month you can use the money to treat yourself to a nice top/cake whatever. Just anything that makes it a bit more attractive.
Im48
You couldn’t be more right. And usually I do pretty well with not googling (partly because I’ve googled my most feared diseases to death), but today..... today has been a total WRECK
but thank you so much for taking the time to reply to me
Xxx
Im48
You couldn’t be more right. And usually I do pretty well with not googling (partly because I’ve googled my most feared diseases to death), but today..... today has been a total WRECK
but thank you so much for taking the time to reply to me
Xxx
We all have our moments, it's always going to happen. Don't beat yourself up about it just brush today off as a bad one and start anew tomorrow :D
Just blame the meteorological first day of Autumn....Throws the best of us off kilter!!:D
Seriously though, cut yourself some slack? We all have pigs of days..you're just getting yours out of the way today! xx
Just blame the meteorological first day of Autumn....Throws the best of us off kilter!!:D
Seriously though, cut yourself some slack? We all have pigs of days..you're just getting yours out of the way today! xx
:hugs:
Just as an aside Jojo. I hope you realize that in the two months since you started this thread, you would be extremely ill, possibly not with us anymore or be in the midst of treatment :winks:
Positive thoughts
Just as an aside Jojo. I hope you realize that in the two months since you started this thread, you would be extremely ill, possibly not with us anymore or be in the midst of treatment :winks:
Positive thoughts
Well yes. Or maybe the symptoms that were worrying me then were not really pancreatic cancer symptoms but these new ones are. Or maybe I was just sensitive to very early symptoms.
Just saying it as it is in my crazy HA brain!!
But thank you, as always, FMP :hugs:
Well yes. Or maybe the symptoms that were worrying me then were not really pancreatic cancer symptoms but these new ones are. Or maybe I was just sensitive to very early symptoms.
Just saying it as it is in my crazy HA brain!!
But thank you, as always, FMP :hugs:
Or maybe your HA brain is having a field day after a mega consultation with Dr Google?!
Or maybe your HA brain is having a field day after a mega consultation with Dr Google?!
Is it VERY clear i am being irrational?
Just asking because it’s often so clear to me how irrational others on here are being and yet...... and YET. To me my symptoms genuinely point to pancreatic cancer.
For three days now I’ve had no appetite, sicky feelings, dry mouth and repeated diarrhoea in the morning. Is it irrational to find these things sinister?
Is it VERY clear i am being irrational?
Just asking because it’s often so clear to me how irrational others on here are being and yet...... and YET. To me my symptoms genuinely point to pancreatic cancer.
For three days now I’ve had no appetite, sicky feelings, dry mouth and repeated diarrhoea in the morning. Is it irrational to find these things sinister?
Had it been 3 months and it was getting progressively worse then no, not irrational. As it’s been 3 days - most definitely. :hugs:
Is it VERY clear i am being irrational?
Respectfully, and from a non-anxiety standpoint, absolutely. You first posted about this fear in March (https://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=214827). As I said, you would be very ill or not with us by now. No doubt at all in my mind.
Positive thoughts
Respectfully, and from a non-anxiety standpoint, absolutely. You first posted about this fear in March (https://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=214827). As I said, you would be very ill or not with us by now. No doubt at all in my mind.
Positive thoughts
BIG BIG THANK YOU FOR THE REALITY CHECK!!!
:bighug1:
OK so today was a better day. I know the panic will return (sigh), but id like to post something that is not my usual doom and gloom. This morning I thought I was never going to eat again, that I would feel nauseous until I died, that my digestive system had totally packed up. But today we went to a friend’s baby’s christening and I had wine and relaxed and - bingo!! - could eat and didn’t feel utterly panicky and ill. Go figure!
Thank you all for being there
OK so today was a better day. I know the panic will return (sigh), but id like to post something that is not my usual doom and gloom. This morning I thought I was never going to eat again, that I would feel nauseous until I died, that my digestive system had totally packed up. But today we went to a friend’s baby’s christening and I had wine and relaxed and - bingo!! - could eat and didn’t feel utterly panicky and ill. Go figure!
Thank you all for being there
Try not to project. You actually don't *know* panic will return. It may never return. Try not to think about the future, especially in negative terms. Think about the here and now. You had a great day. You had a fun time at the christening, and you were relaxed and with friends. These are the things that count, and hang on to them. It is called living, and it is the wonderful thing we do when anxiety doesn't have us by the short hairs. I have more days like this than not, and there was a time I thought I would never be better too.
Try not to project. You actually don't *know* panic will return. It may never return. Try not to think about the future, especially in negative terms. Think about the here and now. You had a great day. You had a fun time at the christening, and you were relaxed and with friends. These are the things that count, and hang on to them. It is called living, and it is the wonderful thing we do when anxiety doesn't have us by the short hairs. I have more days like this than not, and there was a time I thought I would never be better too.
I’m so pleased you do iofwyr - that is a wonderful thing to hear! :hugs:
paranoid-viking
02-09-18, 19:45
Is it VERY clear i am being irrational?
Just asking because it’s often so clear to me how irrational others on here are being and yet...... and YET. To me my symptoms genuinely point to pancreatic cancer.
For three days now I’ve had no appetite, sicky feelings, dry mouth and repeated diarrhoea in the morning. Is it irrational to find these things sinister?
When we google the mind play tricks on os to make it seem genuinely.
OK so today was a better day. I know the panic will return (sigh), but id like to post something that is not my usual doom and gloom. This morning I thought I was never going to eat again, that I would feel nauseous until I died, that my digestive system had totally packed up. But today we went to a friend’s baby’s christening and I had wine and relaxed and - bingo!! - could eat and didn’t feel utterly panicky and ill. Go figure!
Thank you all for being there
Panic cancer responds to a medicinal dose of wine and good company!
Glad to hear today has been better and that you were able to enjoy and share in a happy social occasion! Dr Google wouldn't be happy though!:D
Ahaha! Yes! Wine is the best medicine for panic cancer!!!
---------- Post added at 21:02 ---------- Previous post was at 21:00 ----------
:roflmao: :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:
Ahaha! Yes! Wine is the best medicine for panic cancer!!!
---------- Post added at 21:02 ---------- Previous post was at 21:00 ----------
:roflmao: :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:
Just as a one-off of course!:D
I went through this scare before. Had stomach pains, even convinced myself my eyes were yellow and had jaundice amongst other things... I was having crazy pains in the stomach and around where pancreas was. Went to the gastro and she scheduled a endoscopy (which I ended up not doing since I had a cough), she also scheduled a sonogram which I did and was all clear. I then kept having pains and they were keeping me up at night so doctor said, lets do a CT Scan. Was aweful, I was so nervous but results came out as nothing, nada.... And then you know what happened? 1 week later, pain was gone, completely gone. Anxiety is awful.
Since then I have had other things happen and have gone to the cardiologist, ect, ect, ect. Nothing every time. I did get lymes and an ear infection, those were real lol but the rest of the more serious symtoms were made up in my head. Dr Google is the worst and I need to find a therapist.
This is how bad it is, I am lucky to have good insurance through my wife. She went to her insurance account and said insurance has covered $40 for her health this year, mine $15000.
I agree, drink some wine and relax, what you are feeling will probably go away
I went through this scare before. Had stomach pains, even convinced myself my eyes were yellow and had jaundice amongst other things... I was having crazy pains in the stomach and around where pancreas was. Went to the gastro and she scheduled a endoscopy (which I ended up not doing since I had a cough), she also scheduled a sonogram which I did and was all clear. I then kept having pains and they were keeping me up at night so doctor said, lets do a CT Scan. Was aweful, I was so nervous but results came out as nothing, nada.... And then you know what happened? 1 week later, pain was gone, completely gone. Anxiety is awful.
Since then I have had other things happen and have gone to the cardiologist, ect, ect, ect. Nothing every time. I did get lymes and an ear infection, those were real lol but the rest of the more serious symtoms were made up in my head. Dr Google is the worst and I need to find a therapist.
This is how bad it is, I am lucky to have good insurance through my wife. She went to her insurance account and said insurance has covered $40 for her health this year, mine $15000.
I agree, drink some wine and relax, what you are feeling will probably go away
Hi! This all sounds SO familiar!! One thing gets ruled out and another pops up. And the symptoms are SO real while you believe you have the condition. Where are you at now? Is the cycle continuing for you? At least you have insight into it, which is a positive sign....
I’ve already had a sonogram (clear) and part of me wants to go down the CT route, but a)it goes against EVERYTHING my poor therapist has tried to teach me; b) I’m utterly cr**ing myself over what it might find and c) if it was clear those symptoms would go but new ones would pop up and THE CYCLE WOULD CONTINUE
:doh:
Yes it would and it does. You sound better and stronger, jojo-good for you! Onwards and upwards and stay well away from Dr G! x
Ahaha! Yes! Wine is the best medicine for panic cancer!!!
---------- Post added at 21:02 ---------- Previous post was at 21:00 ----------
:roflmao: :roflmao::roflmao::roflmao::roflmao:
Don't forget chocolate! :dribble::dribble:
Don't forget chocolate! :dribble::dribble:
So funny! I am actually eating a twirl this very second!!:blush:
Hi! This all sounds SO familiar!! One thing gets ruled out and another pops up. And the symptoms are SO real while you believe you have the condition. Where are you at now? Is the cycle continuing for you? At least you have insight into it, which is a positive sign....
I’ve already had a sonogram (clear) and part of me wants to go down the CT route, but a)it goes against EVERYTHING my poor therapist has tried to teach me; b) I’m utterly cr**ing myself over what it might find and c) if it was clear those symptoms would go but new ones would pop up and THE CYCLE WOULD CONTINUE
:doh:
Where I am. Well. I know I don't have PC so thats awesome BUT I have moved to another thing, then moved to another, then to another and currently have something else. Its not a good situation but I am trying to change it.
I did some therapy class sessions but they just did not work for me, it was just was not specific enough to health anxiety. Was anxiety in general, breathing exercises, ect. So now in the next few weeks I am going to get a therapist and see if that will help. I am hoping so or I will be doing this crazyness all my life and its not good. My wife always says, its like you want to be sick or something. she obviously does not understand what we go through.
I wish you luck no matter what you decide to do. I have been at I don't trust the doctor thing... what if he/she missed something. Hell, I just did this with my dentist a month ago but decided to just let it go and believe what he has to say. So far so good.
Worriedwellornot
08-09-18, 11:27
Hi jojo was just scanning through your posts and you seem to have followed a very similar pattern to mine. Pancreatic Cancer has been a huge worry for me over the last 4 years but now moved my focus to Ovarian after seeing a friends FB post with symptoms. Going down the rabbit hole myself at the moment xx
richieron446
25-09-18, 15:58
Pulisa you seem to be very positive and have some great advice.. A litte about my HA which I have had forever.
......Most recently I was taking a medication that when stopped or even sometimes on will cause brain fog and then persist when you stop.. Well this happenes to me and it has been about a month now. Although sometimes its not there and my doctor seems to think it is anxiety.. Which it could be becuase this medication meses with nuerosteriods. At one point I worried about Brain Cancer.. Here is where I made my biggest mistake.
I have had acid reflux for over ten years on and off. A few months back I was taking massive amounts of taurine and hurt my stomach pretty bad.. Recently I started taking taurine again in moderate to large doeses along with lots of coffee and other supplements known to cause or contribute to Ulcers while fasting.. About a week and a half ago I took another supplement while fasting known to be unkind to the stomach.. About 20 minutes later I had very bad stomach pains indicative of an ulcer..... After about 2 days the pain subsided so I kept eating normally until a few days after the pain returned and my stool was very black.. I immediately took prescription proton inhibter medication and the pain subsided and the stool returmed to normal within a day and a half. The pain seems to be gone but the reflux is there slightly. This prompted me to see a doctor.. The doctor looked at my eyes no anemia no jaundice ... No real bad pains when Palpating just a little uncomfortable when people push down hard on stomach plus may still be a little inflamed. She said she was not really concerened but since I am a new patient she will order some blood to check hormones from that medication amd do a ultrasound. She said its gonna be boring and when results are back and good I should deal with my anxiety. I'm freaking out about Pancreatic Cancer as well... Had a test fpr it (CT) scan about 4 years ago and was all clear... I think I just aggravated my GI with the stuff I was doing and may have created slight ulcer ... Which appears to have helaed but now my mind is linking the brain fog to this like its a slight diabetic vague symptom.. I would think by now if this was PC and was progressing enough to do that then I would have other issues.. What do u think?
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Sounds to me like gastritis aggravated by those supplements. Why are you taking them when you know they will irritate your stomach? The doctor wasn't concerned but the bloods will be a good guide as to whether you are anaemic or not from any potential ulcer
I'd ditch the supplements and get your acid reflux under control with a month's course of PPIs if your GP suggests this of course. Be really careful with your diet. Once your results are back you can concentrate on your anxiety levels.
Imaleopard
25-09-18, 20:35
Hi jojo was just scanning through your posts and you seem to have followed a very similar pattern to mine. Pancreatic Cancer has been a huge worry for me over the last 4 years but now moved my focus to Ovarian after seeing a friends FB post with symptoms. Going down the rabbit hole myself at the moment xx
Omg me too! I’m convinced I have both right now, it’s terrible!
richieron446
26-09-18, 02:44
Sounds to me like gastritis aggravated by those supplements. Why are you taking them when you know they will irritate your stomach? The doctor wasn't concerned but the bloods will be a good guide as to whether you are anaemic or not from any potential ulcer
I'd ditch the supplements and get your acid reflux under control with a month's course of PPIs if your GP suggests this of course. Be really careful with your diet. Once your results are back you can concentrate on your anxiety levels.Thank you so much Pulisa. I agree .. I'm pretty sure the ultrasound will be uneventful or reveal gastritis or superficial ulcer.. As long as the doc was not concerned about more serious things which it been over a month I think by now I would have additional issues if that were the case.... Once I get past this its time to really and finally deal with my anxiety
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---------- Post added 26-09-18 at 01:44 ---------- Previous post was 25-09-18 at 23:29 ----------
Hey I think based on what you are presenting you are fine... Reading what u said about ur fear of early stages it would surly be causing other symptoms if it were big enough to pallpate and hurt ur stomach.. Maybe we can help each other. I have a post on this thread fairly recent tell me what u think.
Hellooo
I’ve been really really trying to keep my health anxiety under control, and I have just come to the end of a course of CBT.... and some days I feel almost normal, with the worries just “back ground noise”.
But not in the last week or so. Recently I’ve become increasingly panicky about pancreatic cancer.
Evidence I have it:
1)I have weird pains/sensations in my upper abdomen and mid back
2)I worry I can feel a lump on the left abdomen near my aorta. (I know for a fact a dr would not be able to feel this as you have to feel REALLY hard and in a certain way, such that I can feel my ribs through the other side, if you know what I mean.)
3) pancreatic cancer is really horrible and has been a long time phobia of mine.
Evidence that I don’t have it:
1)I had an ultrasound a few months ago last time I worried about PC that showed nothing (but they often don’t!!)
2)I have similar symptoms every time I worry about PC (which has been several times over the last decade!) and in the past they have always gone when my worries move on (but this time they feel more real)
3)I have thought I detected an abdominal lump years ago after intense searching and doctors never have. I could be feeling too hard/wrong/imagining things (but maybe I’m not...)
4)I’m not losing weight or jaundiced etc (could be early stages)
5)I’m fit (ran a mountain marathon at the weekend :winks:!)(as above...)
But I am REALLY worried. And a bit tearful. What I WANT to do is bypass my doctor and book a private CT scan. But a) im really scared what it will find (don’t want to be diagnosed with terminal cancer at beginning of summer hols) and b) it goes against EVERYTHING i have learned in my CBT
Thank you for reading..... any supportive words would be soooo so appreciated.
Love Jojo xxx
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richieron446
26-09-18, 18:20
I’m so pleased you do iofwyr - that is a wonderful thing to hear! :hugs:Hey jojo how did everything turn out so far?
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Hi - well I’m still alive so that’s a positive!!!!
Symptoms come and go- today it is mostly come because I was totally triggered by a really awful article in a really awful online new site!!!
What about you?
---------- Post added at 19:33 ---------- Previous post was at 19:25 ----------
Pulisa you seem to be very positive and have some great advice.. A litte about my HA which I have had forever.
......Most recently I was taking a medication that when stopped or even sometimes on will cause brain fog and then persist when you stop.. Well this happenes to me and it has been about a month now. Although sometimes its not there and my doctor seems to think it is anxiety.. Which it could be becuase this medication meses with nuerosteriods. At one point I worried about Brain Cancer.. Here is where I made my biggest mistake.
I have had acid reflux for over ten years on and off. A few months back I was taking massive amounts of taurine and hurt my stomach pretty bad.. Recently I started taking taurine again in moderate to large doeses along with lots of coffee and other supplements known to cause or contribute to Ulcers while fasting.. About a week and a half ago I took another supplement while fasting known to be unkind to the stomach.. About 20 minutes later I had very bad stomach pains indicative of an ulcer..... After about 2 days the pain subsided so I kept eating normally until a few days after the pain returned and my stool was very black.. I immediately took prescription proton inhibter medication and the pain subsided and the stool returmed to normal within a day and a half. The pain seems to be gone but the reflux is there slightly. This prompted me to see a doctor.. The doctor looked at my eyes no anemia no jaundice ... No real bad pains when Palpating just a little uncomfortable when people push down hard on stomach plus may still be a little inflamed. She said she was not really concerened but since I am a new patient she will order some blood to check hormones from that medication amd do a ultrasound. She said its gonna be boring and when results are back and good I should deal with my anxiety. I'm freaking out about Pancreatic Cancer as well... Had a test fpr it (CT) scan about 4 years ago and was all clear... I think I just aggravated my GI with the stuff I was doing and may have created slight ulcer ... Which appears to have helaed but now my mind is linking the brain fog to this like its a slight diabetic vague symptom.. I would think by now if this was PC and was progressing enough to do that then I would have other issues.. What do u think?
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Based on the fact that you had similar symptoms 4 years ago - and a negative scan - is extremely reassuring. It does sound like anxiety to me. But do use me as a sympathetic ear - because I’m in that boat with you!!
How did you come across this site, jojo........
It’s the bloomin’ DAILY MAIL. Which I hate and totally pretend I never read but get drawn to the horror stories in the health section.....
---------- Post added at 19:56 ---------- Previous post was at 19:55 ----------
Does that count as googling Pulisa???
It’s the bloomin’ DAILY MAIL. Which I hate and totally pretend I never read but get drawn to the horror stories in the health section.....
---------- Post added at 19:56 ---------- Previous post was at 19:55 ----------
Does that count as googling Pulisa???
YES!!! The Daily Fail should never be read by the worried well!
richieron446
27-09-18, 03:39
Hi - well I’m still alive so that’s a positive!!!!
Symptoms come and go- today it is mostly come because I was totally triggered by a really awful article in a really awful online new site!!!
What about you?
---------- Post added at 19:33 ---------- Previous post was at 19:25 ----------
Based on the fact that you had similar symptoms 4 years ago - and a negative scan - is extremely reassuring. It does sound like anxiety to me. But do use me as a sympathetic ear - because I’m in that boat with you!!Thanks jojo... I hope you got some positive results back by now.. As for me I go on Saturday.. To get some testing... I have been pressing my stomach in to look for problem spots so much that it has worsened my reflux. Do you know or know anyone that has taken zantac (Rantidine) and had it turn their stool yellow. Its listed as a side effect and I have read plenty of forums where people tell how it did it to them... Because it just happened to me.. I just started taking it amd of course this is the last thing I want to be thinking of right now .. Freaking out as usual.
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Haha yes! Yellow stool is a terror of mine!!! I even eat lots of green and red veggies to make sure I don’t get it because it always freaks me out and sends me into a spiral (and it’s happened many tines). But it seems to be relatively common (just look on here) and my children always have yellow poo. So don’t worry- and PLUS Zantac causes it so DOUBLE don’t worry!
I haven’t had any tests other than a self refered ultrasound (I mean, I should clarify, I’ve had a gazillion tests for various things over the years. But I’ve only had - (three!!!) - ultrasounds on my pancreas.
I also poke and press my tummy- defo makes things worse so try not to!
Just this week a friend of mine has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. He's been told he has 3 months to live without chemo & 18 months max with chemo. I'm not trying to scare or belittle what you are feeling - I completely get it. I suffer with mild HA myself (I'm focused on my breathing this time round :doh:) & it's a horrible vicious circle. I guess my point is that if you've had every test under the sun & a doctor tells you everything is ok then believe it. There were no questions or doubts that there was something very wrong with my friend - his symptoms were rapid & noticeable. Symptoms that come and go are rarely anything serious. Like I said though, I get it. I've been through some awful moments with HA but you can get on top of it & you will. Sending big hugs. xx
richieron446
27-09-18, 11:22
Just this week a friend of mine has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. He's been told he has 3 months to live without chemo & 18 months max with chemo. I'm not trying to scare or belittle what you are feeling - I completely get it. I suffer with mild HA myself (I'm focused on my breathing this time round :doh:) & it's a horrible vicious circle. I guess my point is that if you've had every test under the sun & a doctor tells you everything is ok then believe it. There were no questions or doubts that there was something very wrong with my friend - his symptoms were rapid & noticeable. Symptoms that come and go are rarely anything serious. Like I said though, I get it. I've been through some awful moments with HA but you can get on top of it & you will. Sending big hugs. xxMeche that is horrible and I'm so sorry for your friend.. Is there not any clinical trials he can take?? I really needed to hear your advice it def helps... I umdwrstand about breathing I'm so anxious right now my heart beating put of my chest wakes me up.. Can't even sleep...
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---------- Post added at 10:22 ---------- Previous post was at 10:20 ----------
Haha yes! Yellow stool is a terror of mine!!! I even eat lots of green and red veggies to make sure I don’t get it because it always freaks me out and sends me into a spiral (and it’s happened many tines). But it seems to be relatively common (just look on here) and my children always have yellow poo. So don’t worry- and PLUS Zantac causes it so DOUBLE don’t worry!
I haven’t had any tests other than a self refered ultrasound (I mean, I should clarify, I’ve had a gazillion tests for various things over the years. But I’ve only had - (three!!!) - ultrasounds on my pancreas.
I also poke and press my tummy- defo makes things worse so try not to!Jojo thank u so much.. I agree with you.. And your def helping. Thank u so much... Just want to get Saturday over with for testing.. Tempting to do it sooner....
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Just this week a friend of mine has been diagnosed with pancreatic cancer. He's been told he has 3 months to live without chemo & 18 months max with chemo. I'm not trying to scare or belittle what you are feeling - I completely get it. I suffer with mild HA myself (I'm focused on my breathing this time round :doh:) & it's a horrible vicious circle. I guess my point is that if you've had every test under the sun & a doctor tells you everything is ok then believe it. There were no questions or doubts that there was something very wrong with my friend - his symptoms were rapid & noticeable. Symptoms that come and go are rarely anything serious. Like I said though, I get it. I've been through some awful moments with HA but you can get on top of it & you will. Sending big hugs. xx
Your poor poor friend. That’s heartbreaking
Thanks guys. Sometimes it takes something like this to put everything into perspective. I felt like a bit of a fraud because he's so upbeat about his situation despite the prognosis not being good - my issues are nothing in comparison. Earlier this week I convinced myself I had a heart condition because I've had palpitations & struggled to get a good breathe. The reality is that I've been stressed both personally & professionally recently and this is how my body reacts. I've been here before & know the signs but unfortunately my brain loses all logic.... & well, you know the rest!! Anyway, today is a better today. Palps gone, breathing returning to normal. You will get through this guys. xx
richieron446
27-09-18, 12:12
Thanks guys. Sometimes it takes something like this to put everything into perspective. I felt like a bit of a fraud because he's so upbeat about his situation despite the prognosis not being good - my issues are nothing in comparison. Earlier this week I convinced myself I had a heart condition because I've had palpitations & struggled to get a good breathe. The reality is that I've been stressed both personally & professionally recently and this is how my body reacts. I've been here before & know the signs but unfortunately my brain loses all logic.... & well, you know the rest!! Anyway, today is a better today. Palps gone, breathing returning to normal. You will get through this guys. xxYes meche we will get through this!
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richieron446
28-09-18, 04:02
Haha yes! Yellow stool is a terror of mine!!! I even eat lots of green and red veggies to make sure I don’t get it because it always freaks me out and sends me into a spiral (and it’s happened many tines). But it seems to be relatively common (just look on here) and my children always have yellow poo. So don’t worry- and PLUS Zantac causes it so DOUBLE don’t worry!
I haven’t had any tests other than a self refered ultrasound (I mean, I should clarify, I’ve had a gazillion tests for various things over the years. But I’ve only had - (three!!!) - ultrasounds on my pancreas.
I also poke and press my tummy- defo makes things worse so try not to!Jojo just checking in to say hi.. I remember when u ssid u couldn't eat for like three days. My appetite becsude of stress isn't the best either and in return I'm constipated.. Great just what I need before getting some testing done soon.... Of course I'm hoping all ur resluts are in and good by now ... I'm super nervous but trying to be positive. Damn HA its tuff lol.. Now the anxiety is getting so bad I'm getting burning sensations. Hope to hear from ya soon.
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Poor you. Yes stress def makes my appetite plummet. You have an ultrasound coming up, yes? I’m not in the pipeline for any more tests (certainly my dr will not be referring me for any).... but in my weaker moments I do struggle with the idea of self referring!! I still get symptoms. Gas mainly, and weird abdominal pains and tenderness....
Keep strong, you will get through this
richieron446
28-09-18, 18:25
Yes Ty so much... There are moments when I'm opptmistic and then of course I freak out... One more day and I can get this over with and hopefully put this behind me and start to get help with my HA specifically... Of course until then I'm still frantic.. I mean 3 years ago I took CT all normal same kinds of concerns except the brain fog, Which coincides with another med I just quit.. So yes I will looking forward to getting this behind me... I'm very grateful for the help and kind words.. It really helps when someone actually knows what your going through.
Poor you. Yes stress def makes my appetite plummet. You have an ultrasound coming up, yes? I’m not in the pipeline for any more tests (certainly my dr will not be referring me for any).... but in my weaker moments I do struggle with the idea of self referring!! I still get symptoms. Gas mainly, and weird abdominal pains and tenderness....
Keep strong, you will get through this
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---------- Post added at 15:55 ---------- Previous post was at 11:55 ----------
Hi WiseMonkey,
I have a question for you given you seem so knowledgeable. Of course I have bad HA.. Stool is turning darker again after a yellow scare while taking high dose zantac..
- lets just say stool does get yellow or bright yellow wouldn't tge duct that's blocked cause urine to be dark and jaundice at tge same time.. Thankfully I'm not sewing any of that.. I have a few other questions but don't wanna overwhelm. I would be very grateful for any advice
Hi,
Yellowish stools can be produced by stools that exit very quickly through the digestive system as in IBS or anxiety. Also if your urine is a usual colour, clear, yellow or greenish this is normal too.
There is a specific blood test that measures pancreatic function, so this may be helpful. My Dr told me that PC is rare and that she's never seen a case in 25 years of practice.
Your Dr would know at a glance if you had PC, which you haven't. Trust him/her.
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---------- Post added at 17:25 ---------- Previous post was at 15:55 ----------
Poor you. Yes stress def makes my appetite plummet. You have an ultrasound coming up, yes? I’m not in the pipeline for any more tests (certainly my dr will not be referring me for any).... but in my weaker moments I do struggle with the idea of self referring!! I still get symptoms. Gas mainly, and weird abdominal pains and tenderness....
Keep strong, you will get through thisJoJo is it safe to say that if stool is yellow urine would be dark too?
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WiseMonkey
30-09-18, 09:49
Yes Ty so much... There are moments when I'm opptmistic and then of course I freak out... One more day and I can get this over with and hopefully put this behind me and start to get help with my HA specifically... Of course until then I'm still frantic.. I mean 3 years ago I took CT all normal same kinds of concerns except the brain fog, Which coincides with another med I just quit.. So yes I will looking forward to getting this behind me... I'm very grateful for the help and kind words.. It really helps when someone actually knows what your going through.
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---------- Post added at 15:55 ---------- Previous post was at 11:55 ----------
Hi WiseMonkey,
I have a question for you given you seem so knowledgeable. Of course I have bad HA.. Stool is turning darker again after a yellow scare while taking high dose zantac..
- lets just say stool does get yellow or bright yellow wouldn't tge duct that's blocked cause urine to be dark and jaundice at tge same time.. Thankfully I'm not sewing any of that.. I have a few other questions but don't wanna overwhelm. I would be very grateful for any advice
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---------- Post added at 17:25 ---------- Previous post was at 15:55 ----------
JoJo is it safe to say that if stool is yellow urine would be dark too?
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My Dr told me that urine would be orange or like tea.
Yes Ty so much... There are moments when I'm opptmistic and then of course I freak out... One more day and I can get this over with and hopefully put this behind me and start to get help with my HA specifically... Of course until then I'm still frantic.. I mean 3 years ago I took CT all normal same kinds of concerns except the brain fog, Which coincides with another med I just quit.. So yes I will looking forward to getting this behind me... I'm very grateful for the help and kind words.. It really helps when someone actually knows what your going through.
Sent from my LG-H830 using Tapatalk
---------- Post added at 15:55 ---------- Previous post was at 11:55 ----------
Hi WiseMonkey,
I have a question for you given you seem so knowledgeable. Of course I have bad HA.. Stool is turning darker again after a yellow scare while taking high dose zantac..
- lets just say stool does get yellow or bright yellow wouldn't tge duct that's blocked cause urine to be dark and jaundice at tge same time.. Thankfully I'm not sewing any of that.. I have a few other questions but don't wanna overwhelm. I would be very grateful for any advice
Sent from my LG-H830 using Tapatalk
---------- Post added at 17:25 ---------- Previous post was at 15:55 ----------
JoJo is it safe to say that if stool is yellow urine would be dark too?
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I would certainly think so. Whenever I have worried about yellow stool and consulted a dr about it their first question is always “what colour is your urine?”... after that they lose interest!!
I’m having a “flare up” again! I have strange left sided sensations, which move about (and are sometimes on the right, and at the back). Reading through my own thread I see that this is very similar to what I have had many times before...... and yet......!! I’m on the very verge of booking a private abdominal MRI (my dr would not refer me for one!).... pretty sure this is not a good idea though. HELP!!!
Don't do it. Don't listen to your HA voice. If your doctor thought you needed a scan you would be referred for one. Don't waste your money on chasing a diagnosis which you know deep down you don't have.
Thank you as always Pulisa. I hope you are doing OK
Xxx
So a little update in this long and boring story. All my other symptoms have disappeared, but now I have itching! All over. All the time! Is it cancer? Is this it?
I’m TRYING to tell myself this has happened to me before. When I worry about itching, I itch...... But.... BUT right now, it is a really real symptom and I can’t stop thinking about it and monitoring my body for sensations..... it’s awful.
I feel helpless because I don’t think there is even any point taking this problem to the doctor. If I was my doctor I know what I’d say :hyper awareness and anxiety.
Arrrrggh I HATE this!!! Thank you so much for listening
Listen to what you would say if you were your doctor..xx
Dear Pulisa THANK YOU!
Short, succinct and RIGHT
Now to try and do it........
Xxx
Don't try too hard though...Just accept it as another little HA "gem" which isn't going to get the better of you xx
blueingreen
12-11-18, 22:13
I have had the full body itches (along with a battery of other odd body sensations) and they did go away after a few days. I have even had it when NOT in the throes of HA. The more you think about it, the worse it gets... Trust that it is not something awful and that it WILL go away!
I have had the full body itches (along with a battery of other odd body sensations) and they did go away after a few days. I have even had it when NOT in the throes of HA. The more you think about it, the worse it gets... Trust that it is not something awful and that it WILL go away!
Thank you so much for replying. I am trying to tell myself it’s my mind playing tricks. I have had - and worried about - the same symptom off and on over the years, so I should take some comfort from that....(SHOULD!!! If only it were that easy!!!:doh:)
Xx
I feel so low today. Nauseated and close to tears. And I’ve caved. I’ve booked- and paid for an abdominal mri scan. I’m terrified about this - what might it find? And also sad that I have failed in overcoming this worry in the way that I should. I cannot tell my family I have done this as they will be cross. I feel very alone.
I understand how you feel and I have so often done exactly the same thing. The only reason I haven’t gone for MRI is that in Australia you can’t self refer (I used to do that when I lived in UK). My dr would probably send me if I pushed it but I’m concerned she would say CT instead and then I’d have to say no I don’t want that as I’ve had too many in past! Im having a endoscopy next week, so I’ll wait to see how that goes. It’s the back and rib pain that’s bothering me most at the moment (I’m trying hard to convince myself it’s unrelated to stomach/digestive issues but it’s difficult!). Hopefully the MRI will put your mind at ease to end this flare up and give you chance to work on overcoming the anxiety.
I understand how you feel and I have so often done exactly the same thing. The only reason I haven’t gone for MRI is that in Australia you can’t self refer (I used to do that when I lived in UK). My dr would probably send me if I pushed it but I’m concerned she would say CT instead and then I’d have to say no I don’t want that as I’ve had too many in past! Im having a endoscopy next week, so I’ll wait to see how that goes. It’s the back and rib pain that’s bothering me most at the moment (I’m trying hard to convince myself it’s unrelated to stomach/digestive issues but it’s difficult!). Hopefully the MRI will put your mind at ease to end this flare up and give you chance to work on overcoming the anxiety.
Thank you so much for replying- and sorry you are going through similar stuff..... maybe we can support each other a little?
Although I make “good” use of the ability to self refer here in the UK (incidentally the companies that run self refered health checks and scans are mostly Dutch and German), I’m very ambivalent about their ethics. I suspect most of their business comes from people with anxiety disorders, and for those people tests feed the problem. But they would argue they are practicing in preventative medicine.... who knows....
Good luck with your endoscopy- let us know how it goes...
Jojo x
Thank you so much for replying- and sorry you are going through similar stuff..... maybe we can support each other a little?
Although I make “good” use of the ability to self refer here in the UK (incidentally the companies that run self refered health checks and scans are mostly Dutch and German), I’m very ambivalent about their ethics. I suspect most of their business comes from people with anxiety disorders, and for those people tests feed the problem. But they would argue they are practicing in preventative medicine.... who knows....
Good luck with your endoscopy- let us know how it goes...
Jojo x
Hi Jojo,
I can also relate to your anxiety. I've been trying to rationally map out why I'm NOT dying, but intrusive thoughts are hard for me to deal with.
In Toronto, I'm pretty sure we still need a referral for scans even at private clinics, otherwise I probably would have caved and paid for one as well.
When is your scan? Will you keep us updated ?
Hi Jojo,
I can also relate to your anxiety. I've been trying to rationally map out why I'm NOT dying, but intrusive thoughts are hard for me to deal with.
In Toronto, I'm pretty sure we still need a referral for scans even at private clinics, otherwise I probably would have caved and paid for one as well.
When is your scan? Will you keep us updated ?
It’s on December 6 :scared15:
And yes of course I will keep you updated. I am under no illusion that it is an ill advised thing to do though. The scan might be clear, in which case I will find something else to worry about or it might find something (maybe something incidental?), which will need a follow up (like my chest scan) and cause MORE anxiety. So from the anxiety dragon’s point of view it’s a win win, more anxiety either way!
It’s on December 6 :scared15:
And yes of course I will keep you updated. I am under no illusion that it is an ill advised thing to do though. The scan might be clear, in which case I will find something else to worry about or it might find something (maybe something incidental?), which will need a follow up (like my chest scan) and cause MORE anxiety. So from the anxiety dragon’s point of view it’s a win win, more anxiety either way!
No, you're right. Even after the US on my abdomen being clear, along with good blood tests etc. I still found things to be nervous about. Always poking holes in the tests or expertise of the medical professionals. So I know exactly how you feel: on the one hand we need the MRI so we can get a clear result and put the anxiety to rest, but on the other hand we, even with a clear result, will just find something to doubt and go looking for another test.
I understand the cycle too well.
No, you're right. Even after the US on my abdomen being clear, along with good blood tests etc. I still found things to be nervous about. Always poking holes in the tests or expertise of the medical professionals. So I know exactly how you feel: on the one hand we need the MRI so we can get a clear result and put the anxiety to rest, but on the other hand we, even with a clear result, will just find something to doubt and go looking for another test.
I understand the cycle too well.
Yup. You get it. I too had a clear ultrasound in the summer. And now I want more. Anxiety is a monster!
My health anxiety has reached ridiculous levels and I don’t know where to turn. Recently I have been plagued by strange there-not-there abdominal pains, which move about. I also have all-over-the-place bowel habits and yellowish stools. I’m petrified of pancreatic cancer, but I’m SO entrenched in a health anxiety disorder I don’t know where to turn for help. My GP - who is familiar with me! - would not give pancreatic cancer a second thought. I could pay for a private CT scan - bypassing the GP - but I have had SO many tests and scans recently (for multiple perceived cancers) that I feel like my head might explode.
Feeling defeated. (Im 41 and female btw)
Oh, and looking at your first post from 8 months ago, I'm 100% confident your MRI will be clear.
I'm no doctor, but IF you had pancan, the yellow stools would have been a result of malabsorption of fat, which is usually a late stage symptom. So given that you were concerned about this 8 months ago, and how we both know how awful and relentless this disease is, you'd probably be dead by now if it were PC.
But it's not PC, so you're good.
Now, if only I could take my own advice lol
Yup. You get it. I too had a clear ultrasound in the summer. And now I want more. Anxiety is a monster!
At least you are aware of what you are doing to yourself, jojo and are not in any way in denial as so many are.
I don't know what to say about your scan on December 6th because I know it won't be "enough". But what is "enough" with HA?
At least you are aware of what you are doing to yourself, jojo and are not in any way in denial as so many are.
I don't know what to say about your scan on December 6th because I know it won't be "enough". But what is "enough" with HA?
I know dear Pulisa. Booking this scan is a massive fail; a massive fall from the wagon.
Well....yes it is a negative move but calling it a fail is harsh on you. You are not doing this for fun. You will be lining the pockets of the companies who target the worried well with their easily accessible scanners and possibly setting yourself up for more "incidental findings" but you already know this and are prepared to take this risk for the limited peace of mind afforded by a clear result..So it's an expensive exercise all round.
I am in a silly spiral again (maybe anxiety about my upcoming scan?). I’m not sure what I am asking for from you lovely lot- maybe just a listening ear (or eye!) - or maybe just a sort of log for myself, a way of recording my hysterical thought processes.
Anyway, WARNING, there is a TMI post coming up (I am so sorry!)
Recently I have been having a sort of oily film on top of my bowel movements - and it is really freaking me out about fat malabsorption and therefore....: pancreatic cancer!
I know I have had - and worried about - this before. In fact, maybe I have always had it to varying degrees, since you have to look in a certain light to see it. But from google I understand that no amount of greasy film is normal. (I KNOW. I GOOGLED!!)
Anyway, here I am in the Dr’s waiting room, where I plan to ask for a fecal fat test.
I do apologise for this post. I am in such a bad way at the moment....
Xxx
Only a few days to go JoJo, it will be a relief when you get the scan out the way! No doubt the anxiety has gone up in anticipation though. Re the oil thing, even if there was fat malabsorption (and I think just because it looks like it doesn't mean it is!) then there are many reasons this could occur that are much more likely than PC! I have had this many times over the years and obviously it wasn't to do with PC on any of those occasions or I wouldn't still be around to tell the tale!
Only a few days to go JoJo, it will be a relief when you get the scan out the way! No doubt the anxiety has gone up in anticipation though. Re the oil thing, even if there was fat malabsorption (and I think just because it looks like it doesn't mean it is!) then there are many reasons this could occur that are much more likely than PC! I have had this many times over the years and obviously it wasn't to do with PC on any of those occasions or I wouldn't still be around to tell the tale!
Oh Aussie - thank you so much for the reply it helps so much! Still waiting to see GP. Loooong waiting times on a Monday morning!
Hi JoJo....
You will be OK. Stool does all sorts of strange things with anxiety. It's kind of like a catch-22. We worry about the odd stools. But the odd stools are often from our worry. As for me, I had PanCan HA back in 2013 quite badly. Went through lots of tests and googling. I could name every celebrity that died of PanCan, and thought, if it could happen to them, then it could happen to me. But in the end, here I am 5 years later. I obviously wouldn't be if my pains had been PanCan. Could it happen in reality, in the future? I suppose. But it seems with me, I eventually give up the struggle and just say that whatever happens will happen. I am in the midst of the bladder cancer fear and struggle now...but I suppose eventually I will give that one up too. We can't chase these phantoms forever. Hugs and best of luck to you.
Hi JoJo....
You will be OK. Stool does all sorts of strange things with anxiety. It's kind of like a catch-22. We worry about the odd stools. But the odd stools are often from our worry. As for me, I had PanCan HA back in 2013 quite badly. Went through lots of tests and googling. I could name every celebrity that died of PanCan, and thought, if it could happen to them, then it could happen to me. But in the end, here I am 5 years later. I obviously wouldn't be if my pains had been PanCan. Could it happen in reality, in the future? I suppose. But it seems with me, I eventually give up the struggle and just say that whatever happens will happen. I am in the midst of the bladder cancer fear and struggle now...but I suppose eventually I will give that one up too. We can't chase these phantoms forever. Hugs and best of luck to you.
Hi Calton - what a lovely uplifting post (right up until you said you were in the middle of a bladder cancer fear!! :whistles:)
I hope that gets sorted soon. And you are right, these things do pass one way or another...... hugs and best of luck to you too
I am in a silly spiral again (maybe anxiety about my upcoming scan?). I’m not sure what I am asking for from you lovely lot- maybe just a listening ear (or eye!) - or maybe just a sort of log for myself, a way of recording my hysterical thought processes.
Anyway, WARNING, there is a TMI post coming up (I am so sorry!)
Recently I have been having a sort of oily film on top of my bowel movements - and it is really freaking me out about fat malabsorption and therefore....: pancreatic cancer!
I know I have had - and worried about - this before. In fact, maybe I have always had it to varying degrees, since you have to look in a certain light to see it. But from google I understand that no amount of greasy film is normal. (I KNOW. I GOOGLED!!)
Anyway, here I am in the Dr’s waiting room, where I plan to ask for a fecal fat test.
I do apologise for this post. I am in such a bad way at the moment....
Xxx
Hi Jojo,
How do you know it's fat? I think we talked about this before, but I also once thought I was seeing a greasy film, but it actually turned out to be cloudy urine that was I was seeing (I saw the exact same "grease" after I peed, and continue too - I don't drink enough water). Also, are your stools a normal size and color? From my last doc visit I explained how I thought I was suffering from steatorrhea, and she said that it usually presents as loose, but bulky stool that is either pale or has yellow streaks mixed in (which would be the fat), that can be very difficult to flush due to the fat content and higher than normal gas content.
Also, are you losing weight without trying and feel overly fatigued? If you aren't digesting fats, you would have a hard time maintaining weight, and would be lacking energy because the body uses fat for energy.
Also, since you're googling anyway, you should look into how pancreatic enzyme efficiency (the issue that causes fatty stools) actually takes place. There are two ways, and I'm assuming both are pretty noticeable. When I was worried about what I thought were fatty stools, I researched and actually was able to convince myself I was digesting my fats (for once, googling actually helped).
First, the lack of production of lipase (the pancreatic enzyme that digests fats), is an end-stage occurrence of enzyme deficiency. Since the pancreas has such a large reserve system of enzyme production, fatty stools usually occurs only after 90% of the pancreas has been destroyed. Unless you've been suffering from chronic pancreatitis untreated for a long time (which has distinct symptoms that would have taken you to the doctor by now), you probably aren't seeing grease in the toilet.
OR, a tumor would have to be blocking the pancreatic duct, not allowing the digestive enzymes to enter the duodenum. This would be pretty painful, as it would essentially cause acute pancreatitis-like symptoms, because the enzymes would get backed up and actually cause the pancreas to start digesting itself. This is definitely something you would notice, as acute panc is extremely painful.
I guess there's a third way, if you had a tumor large enough to block off the common bile duct, but you'd also know for sure if that happened, because you'd look like a banana, be shitting chalk, and pissing coca-cola.
What did your doc say?
Hi Hypomania - thank you so much for such an informative reply. It had made me feel much better than the doctor did. My stools are kind of normal other than the greasy film (which I have noticed and worried about before, many times actually, over the years -!!) so I guess if it was end stage PC, I would’ve noticed other stuff by now.
Anyway the doctor, who I have never met before, actually googled right in front of me about tests to do when a patient presents with fat malabsorption. There are various blood tests, it turns out, which she ordered. What on earth did GP’s do before google?!?!
This is a 12 page thread of pancreatic cancer fears that started the beginning of the year. Think about that. Nearly an entire year has gone by and everyone is still here ;) I don't doubt the members are having symptoms and I'm sure they're quite unpleasant but the reality is, all participating and fearing pancreatic cancer would be critically ill or dead by now.
I hope you find resolution and answers to your symptoms soon so you can start treating your anxiety about them.
Positive thoughts
This is a 12 page thread of pancreatic cancer fears that started the beginning of the year. I don't doubt the members are having symptoms and I'm sure they're quite unpleasant but the reality is, all participating and fearing pancreatic cancer would be critically ill or dead by now.
I hope you find resolution and answers to your symptoms soon so you can start treating your anxiety about them.
Positive thoughts
I am trying to treat my anxiety simultaneously, I promise. Good point though, well made :shades:
Hi Hypomania - thank you so much for such an informative reply. It had made me feel much better than the doctor did. My stools are kind of normal other than the greasy film (which I have noticed and worried about before, many times actually, over the years -!!) so I guess if it was end stage PC, I would’ve noticed other stuff by now.
Anyway the doctor, who I have never met before, actually googled right in front of me about tests to do when a patient presents with fat malabsorption. There are various blood tests, it turns out, which she ordered. What on earth did GP’s do before google?!?!
What blood tests dod she order? Mine ordered an evaluation of pancreatic function (lipase and amalayse levels).
Mine turned out normal. Normal levels generally rules out any inflammation and the fact that I have normal lipase levels reassured me that my pancreas is still producing the enzymes.
Did the doc not give you any ideas as to what it is?
What blood tests dod she order? Mine ordered an evaluation of pancreatic function (lipase and amalayse levels).
Mine turned out normal. Normal levels generally rules out any inflammation and the fact that I have normal lipase levels reassured me that my pancreas is still producing the enzymes.
Did the doc not give you any ideas as to what it is?
I think it was just vitamin b12, vitamin d, cholesterol, things which would be low if I did in fact have malabsorption (or a poor diet!). I don’t think she was very interested really (fair enough..)
My advice would be "Flush and Go" until the scan and no blood tests.
The GP is just fuelling your HA and took the easy route. She didn't appear interested because she was just going through the motions (pardon the pun!!)
I know you are fighting hard against your anxiety, jojo and it's easy to dole out advice. Maybe after this scan and hopefully a good outcome you can begin to "flush and go" and put a break on these fears? xxx
Thank you Pulisa
Yes she was certainly “going through the motions” (haha), but why not.... she’s busy, she’s never met me before (my regular Dr, who is lovely, and who certainly would’ve handled it differently, has llooooong wait times), she needs to get onto the next patient. It was my fault for going, really. She did - when pushed - say that nothing she had seen or heard made her think of “panic cancer”. But that was it. That was the only tidbit my anxiety dragon got!!
Hope London went well!
Xxx
It did thanks!
I know in hindsight it's easy to think back and regret going to the GP-especially if you end up seeing an unknown one-but at the time you just want help and someone to put a lid on your panic. I've done it many times.
Sitting it out is incredibly hard but it can help in the long run with HA. Insisting that your GP only offers tests based on clinical need really tests your HA resolve but it sorts the crap GPs from the really good ones..and you normally would see a really good one who challenges your HA and has your best interests at heart. I don't think this one you saw yesterday did have your best interests at heart. She was just a CYA specialist who had to resort to google in front of you!
It's awful really..but you can move on from this. You-and I-know you can xx
I think it was just vitamin b12, vitamin d, cholesterol, things which would be low if I did in fact have malabsorption (or a poor diet!). I don’t think she was very interested really (fair enough..)
Ah that's annoying. I've had walk-in doctors like that before. The ones like that are usually fee-for-service instead of salary, so they just want to churn out patients to rack up their invoice.
Once I went to a walk-in ages ago because I was worried about colon cancer. The doc just said "how do you expect me to diagnose that here?".
In retrospect, it was a fair question I guess, but he didn't even bother to really check into my medical history or "symptoms". I'm also sure he double-billed the government as well lol.
So scan done yesterday - results next Thursday. Strangely - or maybe not strangely, given the nature of the HA beast - I feel myself already starting to worry about other symptoms..... seeing signs of other possible diseases. Bloody HA!!!
Glad the scan is over with! Sounds just like me moving on to other symptoms afterwards! By this time next week hopefully you can put this anxiety flare up behind you x
Glad the scan is over with! Sounds just like me moving on to other symptoms afterwards! By this time next week hopefully you can put this anxiety flare up behind you x
I wish!
I’m very very bad at the mo’!!!
What about you, how are you doing Aussie? :hugs:
Feeling slightly better from anxiety point of view thanks, but unfortunately the rib and back pain still there constantly, tummy playing up a bit. Stomach part doesn’t bother me as much as I can rationalise that as IBS. It’s the rib stuff that is really getting to me. I’m getting my mind off it slightly the last couple of days, seeing my Gastroenterologist Tuesday for endoscopy results so I’m looking forward to asking him some more questions and see if he suggests anything else. Just want to move on and be able to look forward to Christmas!
So scan done yesterday - results next Thursday. Strangely - or maybe not strangely, given the nature of the HA beast - I feel myself already starting to worry about other symptoms..... seeing signs of other possible diseases. Bloody HA!!!
Yeah, that's the horrible cycle of HA. I used to be able to just move on and let my HA go dormant, but as I got older I started having chains of different diseases I was worried about.
For instance (as you already know from my threads), I was worried about liver cancer back in September... repeat bloods and US were both perfect. So now I think I have pancreatic cancer for some reason. No real symptoms except for a little twinge around various parts of my abdomen every once in a while, yet the link between my original liver trigger and the current fear of PC remains.
Maybe these new "symptoms" are a result of you just being a little anxious about your MRI results? I know it's quite the coincidence for me to start having left sided discomfort as soon as I think I have PC. Do you know why you started thinking you have a new disease?
Feeling slightly better from anxiety point of view thanks, but unfortunately the rib and back pain still there constantly, tummy playing up a bit. Stomach part doesn’t bother me as much as I can rationalise that as IBS. It’s the rib stuff that is really getting to me. I’m getting my mind off it slightly the last couple of days, seeing my Gastroenterologist Tuesday for endoscopy results so I’m looking forward to asking him some more questions and see if he suggests anything else. Just want to move on and be able to look forward to Christmas!
I've had right sided discomfort below my ribs since september. It's not painful, just feels "tight". I had an ultrasound to check for liver/pancreas pathology, but it was all clear. But you've already that checked out right?
Hope you're feeling good today, jojo.
Feeling slightly better from anxiety point of view thanks, but unfortunately the rib and back pain still there constantly, tummy playing up a bit. Stomach part doesn’t bother me as much as I can rationalise that as IBS. It’s the rib stuff that is really getting to me. I’m getting my mind off it slightly the last couple of days, seeing my Gastroenterologist Tuesday for endoscopy results so I’m looking forward to asking him some more questions and see if he suggests anything else. Just want to move on and be able to look forward to Christmas!
Great the anxiety is better but sorry about the pain- is there anything you can take for it? You have a baby don’t you? She or he probably contributes to your back pain:winks: sometimes, though, pain really has no explanation
Xxx
---------- Post added at 21:47 ---------- Previous post was at 21:36 ----------
Yeah, that's the horrible cycle of HA. I used to be able to just move on and let my HA go dormant, but as I got older I started having chains of different diseases I was worried about.
For instance (as you already know from my threads), I was worried about liver cancer back in September... repeat bloods and US were both perfect. So now I think I have pancreatic cancer for some reason. No real symptoms except for a little twinge around various parts of my abdomen every once in a while, yet the link between my original liver trigger and the current fear of PC remains.
Maybe these new "symptoms" are a result of you just being a little anxious about your MRI results? I know it's quite the coincidence for me to start having left sided discomfort as soon as I think I have PC. Do you know why you started thinking you have a new disease?
?
So according to my therapist it’s important to let a health anxiety crisis subside on its own (physiologically, anxiety cannot persist for long at peak panic level... apparently). If you combat it with a “quick fix”; which means reassurance basically, while the anxiety is still high.... your frightened brain will cast around for another source of danger.... hey presto! New disease fixation!!
Although, with me, I haven’t actually had the reassurance for pancan, since I don’t have any results...... so I don’t really know why I’m moving on already..... Mmmmmm:wacko:
---------- Post added at 21:51 ---------- Previous post was at 21:47 ----------
Hope you're feeling good today, jojo.
A little but better this evening thank you Calton.... dons red wine and lovely friends staying for a sleepover. Best medicine!
How are you doing? You sounded pretty low yesterday....
So, I'm not a psychologist, so I'm mainly speaking out of my ass here, but I know with me there's a certain subconscious level where I KNOW I'm fine (I mean really, how many times will we have cancer in our lives. I think deep down, you, and a lot of posters here, must know this as well, despite our periods of high anxiety. We've thought we've had cancer multiple times before and were wrong every time). So, point being, when I had my clear U/S and bloods etc, I still felt like I was in a panicked/anxious state despite the temp reassurance from my tests, so I was thinking "well, obviously I have something wrong with me, but it just wasn't shown on my scans... it must be something that isn't easily detected.. MUST be pancreatic cancer!" I didn't have the tools to combat those thoughts then... they're still not fully developed, but I am better at reigning in my catastrophic thinking.
I think your therapist is spot on, the HA has to subside on its own, without reassurance. Reassurance seeking (and I'm VERY guilty of this myself) feeds your anxiety. But when you can effectively reassure yourself, that's the key. There will surely be times when we feel like something is "off", but at the end of the day we don't have any obvious or classic PC symptoms. We just have to figure out how to remind ourselves of that effectively, and apply those cognitive techniques to other worries as well.
When I feel something in my body that makes me doubt my own reassurances, and I feel my anxiety rising, I create a thought record... ie: categorizing my thought process which ultimately leads to re-framing my mental state. So, I feel a twinge that makes me initially think "oh no, that minor pain must mean my pancreas is failing, or pushing on my stomach, or whatever whatever", but then I'll make a list of why I have PC, then why I don't (the "don't" list is much much larger) and then use that to reframe my my train of thought and hopefully bring my anxiety levels down.
So, I'm not a psychologist, so I'm mainly speaking out of my ass here, but I know with me there's a certain subconscious level where I KNOW I'm fine.
YES.
This is so interesting and important. This MUST be the reason I often lose interest in an illness BEFORE I get the test results. It’s happened a few times. It must be what you say, somewhere, subconsciously, we KNOW it’s not what we fear. F***! That is truly f****d up because if it’s true why is it so genuinely TERRIFYING when you are in the thick of it? I am literally driven mad by fear, and how can that be, if deep down I KNOW my demon is imagined??
Urgh! You’ve exploded my head!
YES.
This is so interesting and important. This MUST be the reason I often lose interest in an illness BEFORE I get the test results. It’s happened a few times. It must be what you say, somewhere, subconsciously, we KNOW it’s not what we fear. F***! That is truly f****d up because if it’s true why is it so genuinely TERRIFYING when you are in the thick of it? I am literally driven mad by fear, and how can that be, if deep down I KNOW my demon is imagined??
Urgh! You’ve exploded my head!
lol hopefully there was no permanent damage.
I know exactly what you mean. I get in those moods where the anxiety and associated symptoms feel so real. But at the end of the day, I felt that way in every single other disease I thought I had.
Someon here, or maybe on another HA forum, said it once, where the anxiety symptoms (or psychosomatic ones) are definitely real, and we certainly feel them on a physical level, but those with TRUE illness (the ones that we fear, Cancer, ALS, MS, etc etc) feel them on a scale that is so different from what we think we're actually feeling.
An example from my own experience: I was eating something one day after reading that PC causes pain after eating. Now, most internet sources are incredibly vague when describing this pain, so we have no REAL idea what it actually feels like. But I took a bite and felt a very quick, but dull, pain in my abdomen somewhere. Later, upon doing more research and talking to people with medical expertise, the pain you'd feel would be so severe that it would put you off eating entirely, just to avoid the feeling (which is actually once of the mechanisms that causes severe weight loss in PC), also, the pain I felt wasn't even in the right spot lol.
Point being, we, as hypochondriacs, definitely feel symptoms, but have no real baseline for reference in terms of how to assess the severity, which in a way is part of the anxiety (meaning that we don't REALLY know if what we feel indicates a problem, kicking off a stream of never ending thoughts about the sensation and it's potential consequences), but I think if we were to suffer genuine pain from a serious illness, we'd be straight to the emergency room, not sitting around wondering if we'll be ok.
At least that's my perspective. Now hopefully I can stick to it haha.
This is some good stuff you're offering, Hypo. Makes a lot of sense.
Thinking of you, jojo..I hope the results of your scan are reassuring xx
Thinking of you, jojo..I hope the results of your scan are reassuring xx
:scared15::scared15::scared15:
A bit of a bizarre distraction from other worries..
You've got your grandmother's genes, remember?! xx
So I don’t have pancreatic cancer! Yay!
But since the problem was really my brain, my HA, the battle continues
Try to remember you're not fighting alone?
Try to remember you're not fighting alone?
That helps more than ANYTHING
Thank you
Xxx
Yay that’s a big weight off your mind then! Yes the HA battle continues, but you can celebrate today anyway. I hope you can relax and move on from this and hopefully overcome this horrible HA thing x
Yay that’s a big weight off your mind then! Yes the HA battle continues, but you can celebrate today anyway. I hope you can relax and move on from this and hopefully overcome this horrible HA thing x
I moved on the day I had the scan- to ALS :weep::weep:
Oh no I’d forgotten that! I had awful headache and blurry vision earlier so was worrying about a stroke, made me forget my rib pain for a while!
Oh no I’d forgotten that! I had awful headache and blurry vision earlier so was worrying about a stroke, made me forget my rib pain for a while!
Hahahah! Sorry I shouldn’t laugh. But it would be funny if wasn’t so AWFUL!!!
Sorry you are going through similar, though glad you understand!
Xxxx
My migraines were always, always, brain tumours, especially the ones with the visual aura.
Apparently quitting coffee is a miracle brain tumour cure :roflmao:
My migraines were always, always, brain tumours, especially the ones with the visual aura.
Apparently quitting coffee is a miracle brain tumour cure :roflmao:
Yes and wine!:yahoo:
What can I say...?
Have you really moved on from panic cancer now? 100% reassured?
Is it only because you have a new perceived disease that you are able to drop the pancan? Or have you still got your original symptoms as well as the MND-type ones?
I am very glad you don't have pancreatic cancer but I know the weight of HA hasn't been removed from your mind. What are you going to do now? xx
What can I say...?
Have you really moved on from panic cancer now? 100% reassured?
Is it only because you have a new perceived disease that you are able to drop the pancan? Or have you still got your original symptoms as well as the MND-type ones?
I am very glad you don't have pancreatic cancer but I know the weight of HA hasn't been removed from your mind. What are you going to do now? xx
Try not to phone the neurologist? :shrug:
Meriland30
13-12-18, 17:02
WHITE stools due to PC are a direct result of bile obstruction and almost always coincides with cola colored urine and jaundice (neither of which you have stated you have. also you would have fatty stools and you would be unintentionally losing weight. PC is silent at first, but when it does start causing problems...they are very apparent. Yellow diarrhea is usually a result of fast transition time in the colon. Going back and forth between stool types is not a sign of cancer, it is a sign of gastrointestinal distress and likely psychological. Anxiety and stress have an immediate, and direct relationship with your stomach.
Try not to phone the neurologist? :shrug:
ABSOLUTELY! If there is one thing you can do for yourself it's this...
You will be wasting your money and enabling your HA.
Have a read back through your previous threads as well as your therapist suggested?
Don't fund the neurologist's already inflated bank balance with your money. Sit tight with the anxiety.
Jojo you were so sweet to write on my thread, and I didn’t see that you were really struggling too. So pleased you don’t have what you were worrying about. Now we could probably both do with working on our health anxiety x
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
JoJo just wanted to ask when you went for abdominal MRI did you have to tell them to look at pancreas or did they automatically comment on all organs in view? I get my results tomorrow, feeling anxious!
BadCompany
25-05-19, 18:26
I'm have been suffering from the same fear for 6 months.......with bad left side back pain and yellow stools......
I had a regular cbc blood work done 5 months ago ........my bilibruin was in the high normal range.....no jaundice as of yet......
If I had untreated pc for 6 months would I still be alive ?
Thanks
If I had untreated pc for 6 months would I still be alive?
You obviously are and posting on an anxiety forum so.... ;)
Positive thoughts
High normal is still normal..... so not significant..
There has always got to be an upper end of "normal" but it still comes into the "normal" bracket.
Am glad that it wasn't you resurrecting your old thread, Jojo!
BadCompany, you most certainly would have become very ill by now. Normal means normal.
BadCompany
26-05-19, 19:43
I'm glad Jojo is ok......I'm just worried about myself as I have had non-stop left side back pain below the rib and yellow floating stools for 6 months now.....no jaundice so far......I'm in a really bad place right now.......please help....
BadCompany, there isn't a lot any of us can do other than give you suggestions to help manage your anxiety. We can't take your fears away - heck, sometimes it's really hard to take our own fears away.
Are you taking any steps to work on your anxiety right now?
I'm glad Jojo is ok......I'm just worried about myself as I have had non-stop left side back pain below the rib and yellow floating stools for 6 months now.....no jaundice so far......I'm in a really bad place right now.......please help....
Why not continue to post on your thread (https://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?229741-Left-side-back-pain-very-worried-and-scared)where you've received answers and advice?
Positive thoughts
Ok. So I’m caving and writing on here about my latest HA flare up. I’m sorry guys, you are my “safe place”, where I can talk about my mad fears without worrying my family (by making them think I am “losing the plot” again. Not because they believe the said fears. They never do.)
I honestly don’t know why it’s getting bad again. I can’t really trace it to anything in particular- but then I often can’t. If I’d written on here 2 weeks ago it would’ve been onto my other “favourite”: my brain tumour thread.
But instead - it’s this. I’ve been getting all sorts of random there-not-there sensations all over my abdomen and back and I am SO hyper aware that it is almost unbearable. It is eating me up. It’s like I feel EVERY little muscle tension and twinge in my tummy. I also had bleeding after a BM this morning (but I do think that was *probably* my chronic anal fissure. I have had a clear colonoscopy less than 2 years ago...)
I know the real illness that I have - believe me- I’ve had years and years to get to know it - yet I have this terrible sense of foreboding (which is also the nature of the beast of course). I want to run to my (private) gastroenterologist and ask for all sorts of tests (most of which I have had already over the last few years, multiple times in some cases)- which I’m sure he’d be delighted to do for £££!! Oh I HATE this silly brain I have.
Thank you for reading. It helps so much just to get it down. Xxx
It does help to get it down, so well done for being brave enough to. Sometimes we just keep these things in our heads, when really most advice tells you to talk about it.
There must be something causing the anxiety flare up, there usually is something innocuous. Perhaps some big anxiety has finished and everything was quiet for a while, so this has come to replace it?
Perhaps it’s school holidays and all the stress / fun / pressure / lack of time to yourself of that is piling up?
A clear colonoscopy less than 2 years ago says it all. Nothing to worry about there. Do you have heartburn or reflux or ibs?
It does help to get it down, so well done for being brave enough to. Sometimes we just keep these things in our heads, when really most advice tells you to talk about it.
There must be something causing the anxiety flare up, there usually is something innocuous. Perhaps some big anxiety has finished and everything was quiet for a while, so this has come to replace it?
Perhaps it’s school holidays and all the stress / fun / pressure / lack of time to yourself of that is piling up?
A clear colonoscopy less than 2 years ago says it all. Nothing to worry about there. Do you have heartburn or reflux or ibs?
Thank you for the kind words Scass. I do have IBS... (I think). Certainly my bowels have intermittently been very weird in the decade since I have had an anxiety disorder. After my colonoscopy I was due to see the consultant again to talk about IBS symptom management. But I never went as I lost interest as soon as I “knew” i didn’t have bowel cancer (I was probably too busy dying of ALS or a brain tumour to bother with gastroenterologists)).... so maybe I will arrange that follow up after all. (Although I suspect I’m just trying to think up a legitimate excuse to get the reassurance my hA brain craves....!)
I hope you are well Scass - and that you are enjoying the holidays?
You have such great insight, Jojo but that doesn't help when you're under the HA cosh. Maybe there has been a trigger but maybe it's an accumulation of daily stress when you have a young family and are "responsible" for everyone's wellbeing and have to spread yourself around..?
PLEASE don't put yourself through more tests/angst?!! You don't want to finance even further your gastro's affluent lifestyle. And you also don't need more invasive tests which are not based on clinical need.
It's horrible when you are locked in that body scanning obsession but remember when you definitely had footdrop? What are you fearing specifically now? Colorectal or Pan Can? xx
You have such great insight, Jojo but that doesn't help when you're under the HA cosh. Maybe there has been a trigger but maybe it's an accumulation of daily stress when you have a young family and are "responsible" for everyone's wellbeing and have to spread yourself around..?
PLEASE don't put yourself through more tests/angst?!! You don't want to finance even further your gastro's affluent lifestyle. And you also don't need more invasive tests which are not based on clinical need.
It's horrible when you are locked in that body scanning obsession but remember when you definitely had footdrop? What are you fearing specifically now? Colorectal or Pan Can? xx
Haha! I’d forgotten about the foot drop!!
im not sure what the actual cancer is I’m fearing. I had an MRI of my pancreas less than a year ago (I think), so I suppose PanCan is unlikely- as is colorectal cancer because of the colonoscopy (although the blood on wiping today did shake me...). Maybe stomach cancer? I had a gastroscopy maybe 3 years ago (my gastro must LOVE me!), which showed mild gastritis and h-pylori. Mayyyyybeee something awful could’ve grown since then???
xx
Haha! I’d forgotten about the foot drop!!
im not sure what the actual cancer is I’m fearing. I had an MRI of my pancreas less than a year ago (I think), so I suppose PanCan is unlikely- as is colorectal cancer because of the colonoscopy (although the blood on wiping today did shake me...). Maybe stomach cancer? I had a gastroscopy maybe 3 years ago (my gastro must LOVE me!), which showed mild gastritis and h-pylori. Mayyyyybeee something awful could’ve grown since then???
xx
I presume you had the h-pylori nuked? So your random abdo sensations have morphed into stomach cancer symptoms? I think your brain is fishing for sinister reasons and coming up with a full catch instead of an empty net..
I presume you had the h-pylori nuked? So your random abdo sensations have morphed into stomach cancer symptoms? I think your brain is fishing for sinister reasons and coming up with a full catch instead of an empty net..
I did get it nuked but..... that doesn’t always work and since my worries moved on I never arranged the follow up appointment which would’ve included a breath test to confirm nuking had worked.
I think you would have been well aware long before now if the h-p was still active?
I think you would have been well aware long before now if the h-p was still active?
Maybe... but it’s often symptomless. Anyway - I can’t remember what drove me to have my (two!!) previous gastroscopies though.. probably the same symptoms I am having now?! That’s why I love NMP. I’m forever thinking my symptoms are new - then I look back and see I’ve had them multiple times before (Mmmmm... maybe I should be worried about my memory...???)
No harm in arranging the follow up.
I had gastritis about a year ago, but I still get reflux flares. Maybe it’s something like that?
And I’m good thanks, enjoying the holidays. Getting a bit nervous the closer the new term gets!
No harm in arranging the follow up.
I had gastritis about a year ago, but I still get reflux flares. Maybe it’s something like that?
And I’m good thanks, enjoying the holidays. Getting a bit nervous the closer the new term gets!
Is your little girl going into year 2? She must be six now, yes?
How did you know you had gastritis?
BadCompany
21-08-19, 21:12
Are your pains moving around ? Mine are always in the back left side just below rib.....never moves.....it's a constant pain....
I wish I had all the test that you have had.....I'm too scared to go back to the doctor....for fear of what they may find....
Are your pains moving around ? Mine are always in the back left side just below rib.....never moves.....it's a constant pain....
I wish I had all the test that you have had.....I'm too scared to go back to the doctor....for fear of what they may find....
They do move around this time yes. But when my fear was specific to pancreatic cancer they were just on the left (the brain is a remarkable thing!). And FYI I’m not sure the tests have done me any good!!
BadCompany
21-08-19, 23:05
Has anyone on these forums been actually diagnosed with pc ?
I have every symptom except jaundice so far.....Im scared for my life every second......I'm in constant pain.....scale 5 to 6 as of the moment.....everything I eat makes my stomach grumble.....I've had diarrhea for over a week....
What worries me more than any of you guys with the pc fear is I think I'm developing diabetes after losing weight etc....
I've had this pain for 8 months....
This is no way to live.....I have no life....
Has anyone on these forums been actually diagnosed with pc ?
I have every symptom except jaundice so far.....Im scared for my life every second......I'm in constant pain.....scale 5 to 6 as of the moment.....everything I eat makes my stomach grumble.....I've had diarrhea for over a week....
What worries me more than any of you guys with the pc fear is I think I'm developing diabetes after losing weight etc....
I've had this pain for 8 months....
This is no way to live.....I have no life....
do you actually know you are developing diabetes- or are you self diagnosing ? I thought you said you were avoiding the doctor? The answer to your first question is no - I don’t know of anyone on this forum who has actually had PC.
To me, your symptoms sound like anxiety and IBS. But why not get yourself checked out?
She’s going into year 1, is 6 in January. How is yours?
I had an endoscopy which diagnosed it. But before that I had a course of omeprazole, then an a ultrasound. Gaviscon is my friend a lot of the time.
She’s going into year 1, is 6 in January. How is yours?
I had an endoscopy which diagnosed it. But before that I had a course of omeprazole, then an a ultrasound. Gaviscon is my friend a lot of the time.
Mine is going into year 2. So big! But she is still my little baby. Xxx
BadCompany
22-08-19, 11:09
do you actually know you are developing diabetes- or are you self diagnosing ? I thought you said you were avoiding the doctor? The answer to your first question is no - I don’t know of anyone on this forum who has actually had PC.
To me, your symptoms sound like anxiety and IBS. But why not get yourself checked out?
Thanks Jojo for replying to me it means alot.....
Sadly after the left side back pain started I developed constant front thigh pain, blurry vision, very dry skin and frequent urination.....
Now some nights I'm getting drenching night sweats which really have me worried......
Sadly I wake up in the middle of the night and worry where should I be buried, who will my wife end up with etc....
I keep trying to find reassurance on these forums and elsewhere of other people with the symptoms that I have and it not being pc.....but my symptoms seem to align with people who have it......
But what's weird is Ive had the left side back pain etc for 8 months.....but sadly developing more symptoms along the way....symptoms that do not come and go.....symptoms I have never had before in my life......
Thanks Jojo for replying to me it means alot.....
Sadly after the left side back pain started I developed constant front thigh pain, blurry vision, very dry skin and frequent urination.....
Now some nights I'm getting drenching night sweats which really have me worried......
Sadly I wake up in the middle of the night and worry where should I be buried, who will my wife end up with etc....
I keep trying to find reassurance on these forums and elsewhere of other people with the symptoms that I have and it not being pc.....but my symptoms seem to align with people who have it......
But what's weird is Ive had the left side back pain etc for 8 months.....but sadly developing more symptoms along the way....symptoms that do not come and go.....symptoms I have never had before in my life......
do you mind me asking how old you are?
BadCompany
22-08-19, 12:09
do you mind me asking how old you are?
I'm 47 years old......
It is so incredibly unlikely to be pancreatic cancer. A 1 in 20,000 chance. (Genuine statistics). But why not get checked out, in case you have something else going on.
BadCompany
22-08-19, 12:46
It is so incredibly unlikely to be pancreatic cancer. A 1 in 20,000 chance. (Genuine statistics). But why not get checked out, in case you have something else going on.
I wouldn't think that ibs would cause non stop left side back pain....the pain feels like something swollen that somewhat burns inside.....
I've read several stories on here of people who new friends or family that had pc in their 40's.....
I don't want to leave my family or this world.....I love life....
I sit here in pain wondering what my future holds. .....
Has anyone on these forums been actually diagnosed with pc ?
I have every symptom except jaundice so far.....Im scared for my life every second......I'm in constant pain.....scale 5 to 6 as of the moment.....everything I eat makes my stomach grumble.....I've had diarrhea for over a week....
What worries me more than any of you guys with the pc fear is I think I'm developing diabetes after losing weight etc....
I've had this pain for 8 months....
This is no way to live.....I have no life....
In the time I've been on the boards, I know of three people that have been diagnosed with cancer. All are doing well and none were PC. PC is an aggressive cancer. In the time your thread has been going, you would be extremely ill by now. Everything you describe goes right along with digestive issues exasperated by anxiety. Treat the root of the problem along with diet modifications like the FODMAP (https://www.ibsdiets.org/fodmap-diet/fodmap-food-list/) diet.
Positive thoughts
BadCompany
22-08-19, 13:17
In the time I've been on the boards, I know of three people that have been diagnosed with cancer. All are dong well and none were PC. PC is an aggressive cancer. In the time your thread has been going, you would be extremely ill by now. Everything you describe goes right along with digestive issues exasperated by anxiety. Treat the root of the problem along with diet modifications like the FODMAP (https://www.ibsdiets.org/fodmap-diet/fodmap-food-list/) diet.
Positive thoughts
Thanks Fishmanpa I enjoy your help and replies....you are an asset to this forum.....
With all due respect I don't see how digestive issues would cause the constant left side back pain, non-stop burning thigh pain, blurry vision etc....I seem to be the only one on here that has diabetes symptoms with the pc fear.....
I'm one of the few people on here that has a very very strong fear of seeing doctors especially with this pc symptoms I have.....I don't want to be told any bad news......
Believe me, BadCompany, you're not the only one who's scared of seeing doctors. I neglected a very obvious skin tumour for half a decade before seeking medical help, and I'm so bad with hospitals I ignored an elbow injury that eventually shed a bone chip from the scab.
The vast majority of people on here are scared s***less, and the vast majority of HA people here have symptoms they believe to be serious to terminal. I'm most definitely one of them. However, I recognise that definite terror is a heck of a lot worse than the vague, fuzzy possibility of physical ill-health.
With all due respect......
I went to GP and explained my symptoms......he said pancreas does not cause back pain.....he felt around my abdomen and said it was not tender.....I told him my research said otherwise......he stopped and looked at me and said that he was a doctor of 25 years and knew what he was talking about.......
So he gave me several xrays and a regular cbc blood work that came back normal.....with normal biliburine and liver numbers.....
Your other symptoms can be attributed to your anxiety.
Positive thoughts
BadCompany
22-08-19, 18:53
Your other symptoms can be attributed to your anxiety.
Positive thoughts
I'm not sure.....even when I get distracted the pain is still there and sometimes worse.....I wonder why I'm getting more symptoms........I pray I'm still here by Christmas and beyond.......
Mine is going into year 2. So big! But she is still my little baby. Xxx
Of course she is! So is mine.
Sorry for the thread hijack x
It's not a hijack...More a therapeutic intervention!:D
And my little baby is 28! Age ain't nothing but a number (says the OAP!)
I'm not sure.....even when I get distracted the pain is still there and sometimes worse.....I wonder why I'm getting more symptoms........I pray I'm still here by Christmas and beyond.......
Have you got a history of health anxiety or any other anxiety disorder?
Of course she is! So is mine.
Sorry for the thread hijack x
A very welcome therapeutic intervention- our babies are FAR more interesting than panic cancer!!
It's not a hijack...More a therapeutic intervention!:D
And my little baby is 28! Age ain't nothing but a number (says the OAP!)
OAP - Old Age Parent? ;) My son will be 30 next year! :scared15:
Positive thoughts
I've got a 33 year old son...who is grateful that his Old Age Parent does his washing!:D
A very welcome therapeutic intervention- our babies are FAR more interesting than panic cancer!!
My baby had a horrible sick bug at the weekend. And is now back on the sofa clutching a sick bowl because her tummy hurts again. I’m full of worry & she keeps crying because her tummy hurts. [emoji853]
My baby had a horrible sick bug at the weekend. And is now back on the sofa clutching a sick bowl because her tummy hurts again. I’m full of worry & she keeps crying because her tummy hurts. [emoji853]
Oh no poor little thing that is really bad luck. But before you start imagining awful things, in my experience, it is not uncommon for children to apparently recover from a sick bug only to relapse again a few days later. All four of mine have done it. I do hope she feels better soon xxx
...... and also sick bugs in children seem to involve distressing amounts of pain...
Nicole0134
22-08-19, 21:21
I'm so glad that when my kids were young, I only had the Reader's Digest Family Medical Adviser to consult when they were poorly. No Dr Google in those days (my youngest is 27) thank God. Not sure I would still be sane (ish) if my HA had been fed for the last 30 years.....
Part of me thinks it’s trapped wind from dinner, she ate loads when she got home & then had dinner.
She watches telly for a bit and then cries that it hurts, then watches telly again.
She is scared of being sick again because it’s horrible- so I don’t think that helps.
But she also can’t really explain it which is a bit frustrating for both of us. Poor little love.
I didn’t know you had 4! Is your 6 year old the youngest?
I'm so glad that when my kids were young, I only had the Reader's Digest Family Medical Adviser to consult when they were poorly. No Dr Google in those days (my youngest is 27) thank God. Not sure I would still be sane (ish) if my HA had been fed for the last 30 years.....
Yes you’re absolutely right.
Still, it’s comforting to have people to talk to online sometimes.
Nicole0134
22-08-19, 21:32
Oh absolutely re the online talking. But no comfort whatsoever from Dr Google. Not for a HA sufferer anyway....
Oh absolutely re the online talking. But no comfort whatsoever from Dr Google. Not for a HA sufferer anyway....
Very fleeting comfort. Googling must be what it’s like to be an addict. Just one more website....
Part of me thinks it’s trapped wind from dinner, she ate loads when she got home & then had dinner.
She watches telly for a bit and then cries that it hurts, then watches telly again.
She is scared of being sick again because it’s horrible- so I don’t think that helps.
But she also can’t really explain it which is a bit frustrating for both of us. Poor little love.
I didn’t know you had 4! Is your 6 year old the youngest?
Yep- she’s the youngest. My baby. i know you are probably thinking something extreme, like appendix (if you are anything like me!!)..... but really tummy aches are so so common in little people. Is her temp ok?
BadCompany
22-08-19, 23:28
I know this is you thread Jojo......sorry
I'm spiraling down into a dark fearful place.....I just don't know what else this can be with all the symptoms I have......I had a drenching night sweat 6 days ago and then the pain got worse....I've had loose stools for over 10 days no matter what I eat.....my stomach gurgle as soon as I eat.....I can't take it no more....
I know this is you thread Jojo......sorry
I'm spiraling down into a dark fearful place.....I just don't know what else this can be with all the symptoms I have......I had a drenching night sweat 6 days ago and then the pain got worse....I've had loose stools for over 10 days no matter what I eat.....my stomach gurgle as soon as I eat.....I can't take it no more....
Go see your GP :shrug:
Positive thoughts
Yep- she’s the youngest. My baby. i know you are probably thinking something extreme, like appendix (if you are anything like me!!)..... but really tummy aches are so so common in little people. Is her temp ok?
Yes her temp is fine. She’s been asleep for a couple of hours - going to try & move her to bed.
I’m jealous of your 4 kids, although I don’t know how I’d deal with them at all!
And yes, I was thinking appendix or something.
Also, it was definitely a sick bug at the weekend because most of the kids at the childminder had the same. So I think I’m just worrying because worrying is what I do[emoji853]
I know this is you thread Jojo......sorry
I'm spiraling down into a dark fearful place.....I just don't know what else this can be with all the symptoms I have......I had a drenching night sweat 6 days ago and then the pain got worse....I've had loose stools for over 10 days no matter what I eat.....my stomach gurgle as soon as I eat.....I can't take it no more....
Yes, go and see your GP. They can diagnose you better than you can.
BadCompany
23-08-19, 02:03
I don't want to hear a bad diagnosis.....I couldn't handle it.....
You have two options if you want to feel better.
1) Go see a doctor
2) Make the conscious decision to live with what you're feeling and deal with the anxiety
Unfortunately, until you pick one of these paths there's not really anything anybody here can do.
I know this is you thread Jojo......sorry
I'm spiraling down into a dark fearful place.....I just don't know what else this can be with all the symptoms I have......I had a drenching night sweat 6 days ago and then the pain got worse....I've had loose stools for over 10 days no matter what I eat.....my stomach gurgle as soon as I eat.....I can't take it no more....
So Badcompany you need a plan. I don’t think this feeling is going to go away on its own. You are in a spiral. Make an appointment with the doctor TODAY. I don’t think it’s pancreatic cancer but you feel awful and you need help. Let us know how it goes. Good luck xxx
Yes her temp is fine. She’s been asleep for a couple of hours - going to try & move her to bed.
I’m jealous of your 4 kids, although I don’t know how I’d deal with them at all!
And yes, I was thinking appendix or something.
Also, it was definitely a sick bug at the weekend because most of the kids at the childminder had the same. So I think I’m just worrying because worrying is what I do[emoji853]
How is she this morning Scass?
How is she this morning Scass?
Hungry and fine!
We’re away for a few days from tomorrow so I’m still a bit nervous [emoji51]
Thank you though. How are you?
Hungry and fine!
We’re away for a few days from tomorrow so I’m still a bit nervous [emoji51]
Thank you though. How are you?
That is great news - and great that you are going away. Where to? We are in Italy at the moment- which is perhaps *part* of the reason I’m having a flare up - holidays always do weird things to my anxiety!
Holidays do that to me too! And there’s always so much stress. Last night our car engine caught fire while OH was driving home, so we thought it was a write off - thankfully not! We’re going to Dorset for a few days.
Is it baking in Italy? It’s suddenly got hot here.
I do hope that your break in Dorset is therapeutic and enjoyable, Scass. I'm glad your little girl is better too! Also good to know your car has been checked over and is fine.
You know what I'm like re "holidays", Jojo! This year it's been an overnighter in Bruges and a lovely general anaesthetic in June...Bliss!:D
Being away from home and in a different country can test the best of us. I hope that you can work through this blip soon and enjoy the rest of your holiday xx
I do hope that your break in Dorset is therapeutic and enjoyable, Scass. I'm glad your little girl is better too! Also good to know your car has been checked over and is fine.
You know what I'm like re "holidays", Jojo! This year it's been an overnighter in Bruges and a lovely general anaesthetic in June...Bliss!:D
Being away from home and in a different country can test the best of us. I hope that you can work through this blip soon and enjoy the rest of your holiday xx
Hahah! A lovely general anaesthetic. Now THAT is my kind of holiday!!!
It's the best "break" ever! Total relaxation and no meals to prepare!
I do hope that your break in Dorset is therapeutic and enjoyable, Scass. I'm glad your little girl is better too! Also good to know your car has been checked over and is fine.
You know what I'm like re "holidays", Jojo! This year it's been an overnighter in Bruges and a lovely general anaesthetic in June...Bliss!:D
Being away from home and in a different country can test the best of us. I hope that you can work through this blip soon and enjoy the rest of your holiday xx
Thank you lovely! I don’t expect it’ll stop me from popping in to see you all.
X
I’m feeling so low today, and filled to the brim with anxiety. I can’t really bother my family with it so I’m reaching out on here for some support. I have horrible tummy pains and Diarrhea and of course I’m fearing some sort of lethal cancer. I just can’t function today. So stupid- but any kind words gratefully received...
thank you so so much
xxxx
Oh, Jojo, I'm sorry! I know it's nothing, but I know how scary it is.
If you drop me a PM, I can give you my details and we can talk on WhatsApp, if you like?
Thinking of you.
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