new to all this

[FAN]

hi i have just joined the site and am not sure where to start so im just looking round to settle myself in

fan x

[nomorepanic]

Welcome aboard

You will soon find your way around and tell us more about you.

Happy posting

Nicola

[Karen]

Hi Fan

Welcome to the site. I'm sure you'll soon settle in and find a lot of support here.



Karen



It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.

[seh1980]

hello Fan,

Welcome to the site!! I'm sure you will receive loads of help and support here.

Sarah :D

[vernon]

hi fan, Welcome to the site. I am sure you will find lots of help here, also try the chatromm someone there usualy after 8 30pm, great to see new faces. take care Vernon

[jill]

Hi Fan

Welcome to the site'

There are lots of nice people here
who will give you help and support.


JILLXXX


All problems have a begining and an end!

[Rennie1989]

Hiya

welcome to the forum!!!

you will settle in quite quickly, everyone here are very nice, friendly and we are all funny (well i hope)

Scooter Girl

8 DAYS TO GO

[FAN]

ok time to explain why im here i think, i had my first "panic" last year after an operation i went back to work too soon(so the doc said) i went on medication for depression and swapped and changed until january this year when i decided i was ok and came off them. Everything went well with only the occasional fright which i talked my self out of until a family problem meant i started to lose the plot again the doc gave me antideppressiants for sleep and assured me the panic was nothing even so they were getting worse and more frequent,i was unable to stop them and resulted in a massive one on the main road where i felt i was gonna die, i literally crawled home and now even the thought of another will prevent me going out of the house if it can be avoided. im still taking the tablets but needed to find some other way of convincing myself i wasnt alone with this or going crazy........So in the short time i been here i have learnt more than in a who;e year of doctors visits and hopefully this will be the push i need to set me on the road to my "old self".............

fan x

[Meg]

Hi Fan,

Welcome to the forum .

Ask anything you like no matter how small or trivial it seems .
Chances are we can point you in the right direction to previous post or help you out directly.

Theres not much we haven't been through with this communally .

What medications are you on right now ?
What other therapy have you had ?

You may already have visited

First Steps : First Steps to overcoming Panic and Anxiety (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=942)
Thoughts : Lets try to keep our thoughts in perspective (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=283)

Glad you've already been helped by being here . There is a way through panic and anxiety and back to living however you choose !!







Meg
www.overcominganxiety.co.uk

You cannot conquer fear until you have learned what it is you're afraid of. The enemy is ignorance. Vivian Vance

[nomorepanic]

Fan

Thanks for the update.

I truly believe that we will be able to give you back the confidence to get back out there and face it all again. Yes it will be hard but we are all here to encourage you each step of the way and we will offer all the advice we can.


Nicola

[jill]

Hi Fan.

I put my hand on my heart when I say,
I would not be where I am today if it was
not for this site and the special people on here.
I am 95% better:D
In our family right now we are all going through
a bad pach.:(, But this site and the special people
have made me strong enough to deal with this.

Believe in yourself Fran you can do this.
With alot of hard work support and time you to can
see less of Mr Panic.
Remember you are not alone.

TAKE CARE

LOVE JILLXXX


Do it trembling if you must, but do it!

[FAN]

just needed to come on and talk about my week so far...on monday my neighbour called to take me round the shops, a big feat but i did it i amazed myself by managing to keep myself together and felt proud when i got home.then on tuesday i decided i would meet my son from school.......think i was feeling rather confident after monday...this i did with only a few jitters and then decided to take him to his grandmas (where he now lives)............after being there a while i started to feel bad again shakin, sweating, dizzy i couldnt talk myself out of it and she knows nothing about what im suffering so had to pretend i may have eaten something a bit dodgy and put myself to bed on her couch. i spent the whole night awake as this was the worse i had ever felt whilst indoors, and it took me the whole of today to feel able to get myself together and come home.........is it usual to have such a bad time after feeling so good for 2 days as this was by far the best week i have had in a long time.....sorry if im moaning but have to get it off my mind

fan x

[vernon]

hi fran, i find this happens a lot to me after a good couple of days u get a real bad one, but as u learn to relax and accept it the bad days do get less and the panic spells get shorter, take care Vernon

PS was nice to see u in chat

[michael]

Hi fan,

I agree with Vernon, you are not alone in this, your subconscious is a curious beast, and can take time to surface things. Although your problems could be related to diet etc. It probably won't help to try and find a pattern as there almost certainly isn't one!
In your life there will be 'safe'places', your home for instance, and outside of these you will feel frail and alone, even in a crowd. This is no bad thing, the danger is to get so used to only being in safe areas that you become home bound.

CBT talks about taking 'baby steps' (sorry if you've heard this before!) try sitting on your door step for while, sitting in the garden, walking onto the road etc. This will help to expand your 'safe' area. It takes time, you will have set backs, but it doesn't matter how small, each step is a major victory. If you can sit on your door step for half an hour and feel OK that's GREAT!

Another one that helped for me was to let your attacks happen, don't try to fight them off, let them occur and pass naturally. this teaches your mind and body that you won't die, or faint if they happen, but will be OK afterwards. This can dispel some of their power over you.

Above all, don't judge yourself and don't read too much into everything. You will have bad and good days, the important thing is to give yourself and break but try to remove this thing from your life one small step at a time.

Sorry if this is preachy, and feel free to ignore me, just thought this might help.

Michael.

You are not alone

[FAN]

your right i do have safe places (mainly home) but im now at the stage where i get the panic if someone tells me they are coming round, i get all tizzy and pacing feeling unwell and then other times im completely ok with the situation

fan x

[michael]

Fan,

OK, well, that too is understandable, I'm guessing, that like most panic sufferers, one of your central problems is control. Not that you're a control freak, but what you know, you feel comfortable with, it's in your comfort zone. Change is frightening, it is for everyone, but for us, particularly so, because any new change brings a new chance for us to lose control and show ourselves up.

Please tell me to get lost if this is too personal, but you mentioned that your mother(?) didn't know about your problem. You MUST NOT BE ASHAMED, you should tell people you trust, they WILL understand, eventually :). you probably think that people will feel you are weak, 'hysterical' the greeks used to call it, a complete loss of control. If they don't understand, you don't need them in your life. They will get frustrated with you, they will not understand, but they will learn to accept you, YOU DO NOT NEED FORGIVENESS, BUT UNDERSTANDING AND SYMPATHY. What this will do is take away the added pressure of having to be normal all the time, which you don't need on top of everything else.

Your 'safe area' doesn't have to be a place, it can be a time, a state of mind etc. You might feel safe in bed, but the bed could be anywhere. you might feel safe when with your partner, wherever that is.

Do you realise that most people can't tell when you are having an attack? You think that everyone knows, and they are all looking at you and thinking how weak you are, but they don't. Tell them, let them help you.

Once again, my advice comes with the caveat that you can feel free to ignore me, or tell me to get lost, these are just my experience, but they might work for you.

Please let me know how you get on.

Michael.

You are not alone

[FAN]

im not sure i feel ashamed about this but not sure how to bring into the conversation the fact that some days im too scared to go out of my front door the only person who knows im like this lives next door and thats only because she had the same problem and recognised it, my mother is the "pull yourself together" brigade and how i wish i could but its not so easy is it. i did have a partner for a year when i was going along ok then it all came up again and i finished it as i soon ran out of excuses as to why i didnt want to go out. i do wish i had mentioned my "tizzies" at the beginning then maybe it would have been easier to explain now but im at the stage where im too used to keeping it to myself and trying to cover it up that i dont know how to talk about it with people who know me im sure from the outside i seem quite ordinary to them but inside im dying i just want to get back to being the person i was

fan x

[nomorepanic]

Hi Fan

Don't feel ashamed about anything with your illness. We all understand here.

You can tell us as much or as little as you want to on here and we all understand and I assure you that no-one here will tell you to "pull yourself together".

We will support you all the way along.

What you need to do first is to accept that this is an illness and it won't just go away and then we can start to make a plan to get you back out there and well again.

Michael has some great advice too so I hope it helps you.
As he says you need to start with baby steps and just getting a bit further each day and that doesn't have to be miles - just a few steps further each day.

Nicola

[FAN]

having a dreadful evening i feel as if im losing the plot again , my heads full of weird and scary thoughts and i cant seem to stop crying i havenot been out for the last 2 days i think and cant seem to get past the door even though i usually can if i try in the dark i dont know why its suddenly all closed in on me i was doing ok although it was slowly i want to go to bed but i know if i do i will be worse and probably find i cant get out of it in the morning which is where i was at before ........sorry for depressing everyone with this but dont feel i can cope

fan x

[nomorepanic]

Fan

We all have bad days and can't do stuff. Don't beat yourself up ok. It is one of those days ok?

Sit calmly and think about it - it is a bad day, that is ok, we all have them. You have not failed and you are not going backwards ok. You can do it but maybe not tonight.

Try again tomorrow and when you feel ready to - we have to be in the right frame of mind to conquer this ok?

You are ok - you are coping and you will cope.

Please just try again when you feel better and more confident ok and you WILL do it.

Good luck coming your way ok?
x

Nicola

[Meg]

Fan..

Blips happen. Don't be too hard on yourself. Some days are easier than others ..Remind yourself of all the times when you have made it ok .

What fear was holding you back today ?

Try again tomorrow. If necessary just stand in the doorway for a few minutes first and get your breathing under control before venturing out.

Its great that you do have someone you can talk to about it all with nearby as well as on here.





Meg
www.overcominganxiety.co.uk

You cannot conquer fear until you have learned what it is you're afraid of. The enemy is ignorance. Vivian Vance

[FAN]

i think im feeling bad because i made arrangements to go see my kids over christmas and now im already thinking bout the what ifs "what if i cant go, what if i go into a panic whilst im there etc"........i tried twice to go out today and couldnt and im not sure my tablets are working anymore as i havent slept well for about a week and if i do i wake up with a very bad headache that wont go away, am going to try go out again a bit later on when my neighbour is home so will see how that goes

fan x

[nomorepanic]

Fan

I am sure that you will be able to see the kids as you really want to and that will push you into doing it. If not, can they come to see you instead, maybe?

What happened when you tried to go out today? Did you get panicky, scared etc?

Try just opening the front door and walking into the street and tell yourself that you don't have to go anywhere just stand there for a while.

I hope you get out tonight.

Nicola

[maxine]

Hi fan,

I am dealing with the same things you are at the moment but i have found great support here i have become house bound but i made it to the end of my street, as you know thanks for the reply by the way.

i have been using the panic/anxiety recovery tape you put your panic in your fist,must admit i was a little sceptical at first put it has definatly helped control my panic when people come in my home it takes practice but it has helped.

I hope you gain as much out this site as i have,plus the chat room is great loads a nice people only a few loonies!!! heehee

Take care fan
maxine:D ps my spelling is terrible sorry!!!

[FAN]

my heads really muddled as if my brain is foggy.......that sound stupid really but i went in the garden and got the shakes, jelly legs, couldnt breathe then it left me with a bad head. i usually sit with my door open any way as i dont like to feel shut in i have taken the spray and the drops of rescue remedy so hope i feel calmer when my neighbour calls i did ask about the kids coming to me but my mother said they cant as would be too busy really so i really do have to get out

fan x

[nomorepanic]

Ok Fan, when you get the shakes stay with it and don't run away. Try running on the spot and give it a minute, see how you feel, then give it another minute.

You will find that the panic reaches a peak then can't get any worse so in time it will subside.

I am sure that you will be able to do it because you HAVE to and that helps cos it means that you are concentrating doing it.

Stick at it - it will get easier and it will go away once you confront it and stay with it. Don't go back inside when you feel so bad, stick at it and it will subside trust me.

Hope you get to see the kids!

Nicola

[michael]

Hi Fan,

This is the old fight or flight mode kicking in, your body is flooded with adrenaline, your heart rate is racing, this causes more blood to flood through your arms and legs, the pressure causes you to shake, as does the adrenaline.
I would imagine that with the panic, your breathing is all out of kilter as well. This feeds the panic. You probably have the urge to hold your breath - DON'T - that just makes it worse! Your body is flooded with carbon dioxide because your breathing is off. You need hold your breath OUT, so breath out and then stop, hold it for as long as you can, this will make the panic subside.
The 'fuzziness' or 'fog' is called derealisation, it is caused by your changed blood chemistry, and will go when you calm everything down.

Having said all of that, you should only use this in a emergency, remember, your blood pressure is high when you are panicking, so you will not pass out, which is caused by not enough oxygen in your brain. As I have said before, you need to let the panic go through you, to teach yourself that it won't kill you. Keep trying to go out one small step at a time, sit on the doorstep, sit in the garden, be patient, don't push yourself too hard.

And don't 'pull yourself together', people like that are a waste of time, ignore them.

You are not alone

[FAN]

woke up today with the mother of all hangovers although i had not had any alcohol so im sure its my tablets, i decided at lunchtime i had to go out as i felt i was going crazy stuck in so i wrapped up clutched my rescue remedy and set off, as i hot the bottom of the road the first panic hit me i got shakey and couldnt breath, (and yes i was holding my breath as micheal had said i might be although i never noticed before that i was) i stood for about 5 mins not wanting to move but telling myself to carry on i kept trying to bring everything into my head that i had read on here and just carried on walking telling myself it would be quicker to head forwards rather than go back it took me 1 hour and 15 mins to do the 40 min walk to see my kids but i got there unfortunately they had gone out??? but thats ok im gonna do the same again tomorrow i refuse to let myself be taken back to where i was a year ago so just gonna think positive and do it.........since i got back home (in a taxi) i have been walking to the end of the road every hour on the hour and now feel much calmer about it

fan x

[nomorepanic]

Hey Fan

Well done to you for doing it - I so proud of you!!!

You did so well to get out and stay out, sorry the kids were out bet that was a bit upsetting.

Good luck with tomorrow - you can do it and you did so well today so keep that in mind ok?

Keep up the practice and it will become easier in time.

x

Nicola

[michael]

Hi Fan,

There's a good Dr Stuarts drink called tranquility tea which is great for bad moments, you need to drink it about an hour before you go out. It's non-drowsy and can be drunk with any medication so it's fine, totally herbal, you might want to give that a try.

Otherwise the small victories approach seems to be working, keep popping out as far as you can. You do not need to push yourself, you can do everything in your own time.

What medication are you on? I like to think I'm fairly open minded about things, but medication...if it's working for you then great, but panic disorder is not like depression, it's not a chemical imbalance, it's kind of like a habit, like smoking. Like smoking, it's harmful, but unlike smoking, it is hard to get under control.

I'd love to talk to you about the medication, if you want....

Love, Michael.

You are not alone

[FAN]

i take 3x25mg dothiepin at night but lately they not helping with the sleep and i feel gross when i get up

fan x

[FAN]

today was a bit of a disaster i did set off in great shape but half way out i started with a panic so i gave in and came home.....now i want to kick myself because i know i should have carried on but didnt.....i really gotta get there tomorrow so will have to really put my mind to beating it

fan x

[FAN]

i did get out over christmas and saw my kids but since then i have had a banging head ache that wont go away.....my sleep has been terrible and im awake most of the night then shattered all day i think maybe its stress and hopefully will go back to normal when every thing goes back to being routine i have tried milky drinks/hot baths but think the laying awake has the potential to send me insane im gonna try see my gp to ask about the tablets im taking maybe they need changing or something

fan x

[Meg]

HI Fan,

Veryw el done for getting out and seeing your kids.

That was a big one for you.

I'm sure your headache is stress. If you're not sleeping then do get up and do something until you feel sleepy again. No point lying tossing and turning awake all night .

Have strong headache tablets plus a pint of water not helped at all ?


Meg
www.overcominganxiety.co.uk

You cannot conquer fear until you have learned what it is you're afraid of. The enemy is ignorance. Vivian Vance

[Karen]

Well done for getting out and seeing your kids.

I'm also having terrible trouble sleeping at the moment and have been awake all night. I usually give up trying to sleep and get up and do something until I feel tired.



Karen



It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.

[nomorepanic]

Well done on getting out to see the kids - you did well.

Are you still getting out each day ?

Nicola

[FAN]

i tried to get out each day sometimes i get further than others but always out so its a start just wish i didnt feel so tired all the time it makes me very unmotivated

fan x

[lainey]

Hi Fan

So glad you managed to see your kids over Christmas, well done you.
Well done on going out every day too, as to the tiredness, I used to be like that all the time until I started taking vit b complex which has helped immensely.

Elaine x

[FAN]

gonna try vitamins and also exercise but im a bit lazy when it comes to that but only getting a cou[ple of hours sleep is killin me

fan x

[tana]

hi all
this is all new to me,but i need lots of encouragment and support,today i took my first ever cipralex tab,i am anxious,have never had anxiety before,things have got out of hand with me at the moment, my gp recommended these,i hope they help!!!! x

jharris

[Karen]

Hi Tana

Welcome to the forum. There are a few members who are taking Cipralex currently and doing well on them. It does take a few weeks for medication to starting kicking in and some people do experience increased anxiety when they first start on the medication.

Feel free to share as much or as little of your situation as you feel comfortable with. I'm sure you will get a lot of support and advice here.



Karen



It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.

[nomorepanic]

Hi Tana

Welcome aboard!

Good luck on the medication but like Karen said you may feel more anxious for a few weeks. This is quite normal so try to stick with it.

If you want to tell us more about yourself then post a message under the "Introduce yourself" topic. We look forward to getting to know you.

Nicola

[lainey]

Hi Tana

Welcome to the forum, I'm sure you'll find lots of help and support here as I did.
Take care

Elaine x

[FAN]

i havent posted here for a while as ive gone a bit off track lots of personal family problems but now back on track i think so will be on more often

fan x

[nomorepanic]

Hi Fan

Good to see you back.

People come and go over time but it is lovely when they pop back to let us know that they are ok.

I hope things pick up for you soon.

Nicola

[lainey]

Hi Fan

Welcome back, hope you are ok.

Elaine x