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KM92
19-03-18, 19:10
So, in the past I have had serious health anxiety around HIV, I was unable to sleep and function for over 3 months due to fear and the conviction of my thoughts driving this diagnosis. I would constantly check lymph nodes, temperature, etc. and interpreted my tendency to get pins and needles on the regular as another symptom of auto immune conditions. This was about 3 years ago.

To my devastation, At 25, I am now struggling with the obsession around thinking I have MS, this was triggered about a month ago when I looked up the symptoms of pins and needles (for my mum) and absorbed the many symptoms of MS. As mentioned above, I have perceived tingling and pins and needles as symptoms before, and I also have some pain under my ribs. The pins and needles comes when i'm really cold and after i've slept, mainly in my left hand, and sometimes in my feet. I have read and read and read into the symptoms, one minute relief, the next utter panic. I am at my wits end, it's only been severe paranoia since Friday but i can't eat, I've missed uni and i'm struggling to sleep - having to ring my mum at 3am to support me.

I honestly don't even know where to start to calm myself down, I have a doctors appointment on Wednesday but i don't know how i'm going to cope until then. I don't know what is real symptoms anymore or my imagination, the 'tingling' appears mainly when I'm highly emotionally aroused or cold, so the logic is telling me i'm fine... but i just can't believe it!

ServerError
19-03-18, 19:35
MS affects people differently and can be quite hard to diagnose. Some people take years to get diagnosed, but even then, the doctors know something is going on.

I'm sure you've read a whole heap of stuff about MS. The problem is, its symptoms are so diverse and affect people in so many different ways, that the more you read about it, the more chance you'll come across something that matches up with what you're feeling. In reality, what you're describing is classic anxiety. My mum has MS. She got diagnosed mercifully quickly, but it was obvious something serious was going on. When you go to the doctor, discuss your anxiety. And remember, you've been here before with the HIV stuff and look how that turned out.

Kingdawson
19-03-18, 21:27
Pins ans needles due to sleeping on your hands maybe? Or your hands being in an awkward pisition that nearly everyone on earth gets?
Do the pins and needles go when you move your arms/leg?

KM92
19-03-18, 21:44
Yeah, i think it is an awkward position, the sensation does usually return after movement or warming up. It's this 'tingling' I can't get on top of, i'm just hyper aware of my hand and can't really explain the sensation but it is mainly my left hand. I think i'm so fixated on its every sensation i can't forget it's there, today when i woke up from a brief nap it was completely numb (i had slept on it) and it didn't work for about 30 seconds but then the blood came back and it had regained dexterity.

Despite being able to rationalise it in this post it doesn't seem to chip away at the sinking dread i have in my stomach, i keep thinking about how I could possible cope with life with such a condition and i don't know how to break such a toxic thought cycle.

Kingdawson
19-03-18, 22:02
Yeah, i think it is an awkward position, the sensation does usually return after movement or warming up. It's this 'tingling' I can't get on top of, i'm just hyper aware of my hand and can't really explain the sensation but it is mainly my left hand. I think i'm so fixated on its every sensation i can't forget it's there, today when i woke up from a brief nap it was completely numb (i had slept on it) and it didn't work for about 30 seconds but then the blood came back and it had regained dexterity.

Despite being able to rationalise it in this post it doesn't seem to chip away at the sinking dread i have in my stomach, i keep thinking about how I could possible cope with life with such a condition and i don't know how to break such a toxic thought cycle.

My friend you are fine and are exprriencing something that literally everyone gets. Happens to me all the time when i'm in a weird position.
A few weeks ago i also thought my left hand had a tingly feeling but after a fee days of obsessing i realised it was just me focusing in on it and there was nothing actually wrong. When you get that realisation youre fine the feeling you think youre getting will vanish.

KM92
20-03-18, 00:36
Last night was the worst I’ve felt so far, I had constant buzzing feelings in my chest whenever I tried to sleep, feelings of sickness and upset stomach. I feel like my whole body is shaking from the inside, panicking more and more. I feel hopeless, nytol didn’t help.

Kingdawson
20-03-18, 08:29
Last night was the worst Iíve felt so far, I had constant buzzing feelings in my chest whenever I tried to sleep, feelings of sickness and upset stomach. I feel like my whole body is shaking from the inside, panicking more and more. I feel hopeless, nytol didnít help.

I have that buzzing/vibrating feeling on my legs from time to time...and i suffer from hypnic jerks at sleep onset. None of this will go away until i sort my anxiety out (same as you).

KM92
20-03-18, 14:42
Iíve got an urgent phone appointment this evening, I thought I was doing a bit better but 3 of my fingers on my left hand got pins and needles in whilst I was horse riding so thatís triggered it all again!

Kingdawson
20-03-18, 15:00
Iíve got an urgent phone appointment this evening, I thought I was doing a bit better but 3 of my fingers on my left hand got pins and needles in whilst I was horse riding so thatís triggered it all again!

You really need counselling in my honest opinion.

KM92
20-03-18, 17:18
Counselling is a long term option, the HA right now is unbearable. I feel physically unwell and keep exasperating ‘symptoms’. I just wish there was something that could help me during these really bad times...

ServerError
20-03-18, 17:47
You could go to the doctor and at least get on the waiting list of counselling.

You could also consider medication. It's helped many many people.

The MS worry is a challenging one because you'll pretty much always have benign bodily sensations that resemble MS in some way.

KM92
20-03-18, 19:10
I still have to manage another night before the doctors tomorrow, I’ve had some diazepam to hopefully dull down the symptoms. I keep getting chills now, and tingling legs, I feel sick, bubbling stomach, headache, aching neck, etc.
How do I even approach the doctor with something like this, do I focus on my worries about MS first and then say I understand it could all be linked to health anxiety?

ServerError
20-03-18, 19:25
You tell the doctor exactly what is going on, then let the doctor decide the appropriate response.

Ryzinn
21-03-18, 07:54
Welcome to the hole that I still sometimes feel like I'm struggling to get out of.

I've had pins/needles/tingling/burning/prickling/stinging pains in off and on in my left foot for almost a year now. I also googled and also had myself convinced I had MS. Sometimes I even still wonder but that's just my own HA getting the best of me most of the time.

Scroll up to the top of this forum, READ the MS thread for newcomers. It'll help put your mind at ease.

My best advice is that unless you have something DRAMATIC going on, you do not have MS. Most people who get it have some sort of neurological failure such as losing the ability to walk, losing all feeling in part of their body for days on end, losing eye sight for days on end, etc etc. If this isn't happening, and you're just getting some random tingles, you're fine.

Anxiety is your issue here. It can create these sensations. Once you realize this and allow your body to just do its thing, your tingling will subside, as mine has.

KM92
21-03-18, 16:23
Iíve read that post, it was very helpful.
Saw the doctor this morning, she said exactly as specified in the aforementioned post Ďits Just anxietyí Ď you need CBTí Ďget back on sertralineí, I left feeling relatively deflated, she mentioned blood tests next time to rule out vitamin deficiencies. I really donít fancy going on sertraline again, I had terrible side effects such as feeling quite suicidal last time I took it, despite telling her this she prescribed it again, may see if I can see someone else and try another SSIR instead.
The thing with CBT and therapy is, iím a psychology student whose delivered such treatment before, I understand itís use and how itís meant to help but remain sceptical because skills and knowledge I have donít seem to help me at all... ugh, itís going to be a long road ahead!

---------- Post added at 15:23 ---------- Previous post was at 13:14 ----------

Iíve had to book another doctors appointment, I keep experiencing myoclonic twitching when trying to sleep and this leads to internal tremors, Iíve gone from being calm to a state of panic again. Iíve googled symptoms again and the first thing it says is itís a symptom of severe neurological problems.

Fishmanpa
21-03-18, 16:29
Saw the doctor this morning, she said exactly as specified in the aforementioned post Ďits Just anxietyí Ď you need CBTí Ďget back on sertralineí,

Iíve had to book another doctors appointment....Iíve googled symptoms again

If you continue to indulge in self destructive behaviors, you'll just remain in the spiral of anxiety. No one here can say or do anything to stop you. It's up to you.

Good luck and as always...

Positive thoughts

Anxiousamyj
21-03-18, 17:27
I am a grad student in psychology, who is also familiar with the mechanism by which CBT works. However, as Iím sure you know, CBT doesnít work if the patient isnít willing/able to follow treatment. A large part of this for HA is no googling symptoms. Iíve been helped tremendously by CBT by following 3 rules that my therapist and I agreed on: no googling symptoms, no body checking, and listening to the doctor after you have your concern checked out. If you continue to give in to your compulsion to google and hyper focus on your symptoms, you will continue to spiral down. Pull yourself out of the hole by stopping the OCD behaviors that are so prevalent with HA. Take the meds if they can help you do this. Believe me, I fell down so many rabbit holes in the last year or so, but have a solid grip on things now due to being sick and tired of being worried and strictly following the guidance of my doctor and therapist.

---------- Post added at 12:27 ---------- Previous post was at 12:16 ----------

Also, pretty sure most people have had myoclonic twitches when trying to sleep, even more so when anxious. My husband gets them all the time and he's actually perfectly fine. Both my children twich when they're falling asleep as well. So do puppies, kittens, and most healthy people. You're interpretation of Google on this matter screams of HA, not MS. Best wishes to you. Its so hard to be in the firm grip of HA and listen to reason when your brain is telling you there's danger everywhere. Trust your doctor. You are going to be just fine.

KM92
21-03-18, 17:42
ďMyoclonic jerks may occur alone or in sequence, in a pattern or without pattern. They may occur infrequently or many times each minute. Most often, myoclonus is one of several signs in a wide variety of nervous system disorders such as multiple sclerosis, Parkinson's disease, Dystonia, Alzheimer's disease, Gaucher's disease, subacute sclerosing panencephalitis, CreutzfeldtĖJakob disease (CJD), serotonin toxicity, some cases of Huntington's disease, some forms of epilepsy, and occasionally in intracranial hypotension.ď

Iím really offended by your dismissive attitude, Iím really having a serious crisis right now and came to this forum for support. Not to be told I am a Ďtrollí.

Kingdawson
21-03-18, 17:54
“Myoclonic jerks may occur alone or in sequence, in a pattern or without pattern. They may occur infrequently or many times each minute. Most often, myoclonus is one of several signs in a wide variety of nervous system disorders such as multiple sclerosis, Parkinson's disease, Dystonia, Alzheimer's disease, Gaucher's disease, subacute sclerosing panencephalitis, Creutzfeldt–Jakob disease (CJD), serotonin toxicity, some cases of Huntington's disease, some forms of epilepsy, and occasionally in intracranial hypotension.“

I’m really offended by your dismissive attitude, I’m really having a serious crisis right now and came to this forum for support. Not to be told I am a ‘troll’.

What you described initially was not what you've just linked. You previously said the jerks are when you are trying to sleep right? Well that's called hypnagogic jerk and differs from myclonic jerks being that myclonic jerks happen at any time. Nearly everyone suffers from hypnic jerks and anxiety worsens it (like mine).

You've come here for support? You've been supported throughout but you more or less ignore the reassurances and come up with a new sympton you are worried about. Wish you all the best in your counselling.

KM92
21-03-18, 17:55
I am a grad student in psychology, who is also familiar with the mechanism by which CBT works. However, as I’m sure you know, CBT doesn’t work if the patient isn’t willing/able to follow treatment. A large part of this for HA is no googling symptoms. I’ve been helped tremendously by CBT by following 3 rules that my therapist and I agreed on: no googling symptoms, no body checking, and listening to the doctor after you have your concern checked out. If you continue to give in to your compulsion to google and hyper focus on your symptoms, you will continue to spiral down. Pull yourself out of the hole by stopping the OCD behaviors that are so prevalent with HA. Take the meds if they can help you do this. Believe me, I fell down so many rabbit holes in the last year or so, but have a solid grip on things now due to being sick and tired of being worried and strictly following the guidance of my doctor and therapist.

---------- Post added at 12:27 ---------- Previous post was at 12:16 ----------

Also, pretty sure most people have had myoclonic twitches when trying to sleep, even more so when anxious. My husband gets them all the time and he's actually perfectly fine. Both my children twich when they're falling asleep as well. So do puppies, kittens, and most healthy people. You're interpretation of Google on this matter screams of HA, not MS. Best wishes to you. Its so hard to be in the firm grip of HA and listen to reason when your brain is telling you there's danger everywhere. Trust your doctor. You are going to be just fine.

I’ve never experienced them before, or have at least never been that aware of them. It’s like I now have a complete terror associated with trying to sleep.
I’ve submitted the referral for CBT, I’m trying to fight it but am really struggling. I thought going to the doctor would relieve some tension, sadly I think it’ll take a fair bit of time to over come :(.

Kingdawson
21-03-18, 18:07
https://www.sleepadvisor.org/hypnic-jerking/

This is what ypu'ce described btw. Have a proper read and really understand what you're going through.

Ryzinn
22-03-18, 01:18
Bud you need to calm down. I know it's hard, but trust me, I literally was going through the same exact thing last year. You're hyper aware of your body, you've convinced yourself you're ill and until you just ACCEPT that what you're going through is anxiety, you're going to pro-long these sensations and freak yourself out that much more. Anxiety FEEDS on this stuff. You're literally feeding your own monster and this in turn is giving you unwanted sensations and or sensations that you NORMALLY wouldn't think twice about.

I had it all, the jerks you describe, tingling, burning, vision issues, dizzy/lightheadedness, and more for months on end and had myself convinced it was MS or something worse. I sought reassurance, I googled constantly, I browsed reddit and videos on youtube of MS patients describing their first symptoms and jesus I was a mess. I visited the dr multiple times, and, finally, after an MRI and two separate neurologists assuring me I was fine, I finally calmed down and SURPRISE -- My symptoms seemed to gradually get better/disappear.

It takes time though. Remember this. I still get tingling, sometimes I even get light headed still, and sometimes I even still wonder if maybe they "missed" something but ultimately, deep down I know the truth. I'm a damn hypochondriac and it will pass.

Relax. Seriously.

KM92
22-03-18, 09:24
Iíve managed to calm down a bit, I cancelled my doctors appointment this morning as I donít want to get into really bad habits. I slept better last night, some diazepam and managed to sleep most of the night, woke up, felt a bit internally shakey (which has been my main concern for the last day) but managed to calm myself to sleep.
Iíve woken up and my leg still feels shakey inside, when people are really
loud in the house in the house it seems to start me feeling internal vibrations and on edge, so Iím starting to realise it could all be down to the amount of adrenaline in my body after the last few days.
Hopefully things will start to get more stable from today.

Kingdawson
22-03-18, 09:55
Yes the internal vibrating is definitely anxiety and actually isn't a symptom of any disease/illness that i know of anyway. That and a twitching eyelid are probably the 2 symptoms that confirm its stress/anxiety.

Btw apologies for my earlier post.

KM92
23-03-18, 05:44
I did okay for a day, but I’m hyper aware of some muscle twitching I have in my knee. I’m taking 10mg of diazepam a night and wake up with a sore stomach, sickness and am a bit stumbly... trying so desperately not to google anything; I have managed to refrain.
I feel so torn, evidence suggests I’m okay, on the flip side I feel I can’t be complacent and just allow a problem to manifest that ‘could’ be there, I think this is why I keep getting ‘new’ daily symptoms whilst the others dissapear �� super exhausting.
Thank you all for your posts, I’m getting tired of this repetitive cycle, just need something to break it. A day of feeling genuinely good would suffice...

KM92
24-03-18, 09:26
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KM92
25-03-18, 15:49
So, last night I decided to get a bit drunk with friends and now I’m in a state.
I’m super cold and keep internally shaking due to this, I noticed my right eye sight is not as good as my left (reading is blurrier when I cover my left eye) which has panicked me. I never noticed it before, but I returned to my old nemesis google and read that eye problems are a of symptom of early MS, so I did some tests and noticed it.
I’m having to go home with my parents again this week l, because being on my own without my boyfriend at home kills me, I don’t know if I can trust myself not to have a total breakdown.

Any idea about what to do?! I got my CBT referral sorted and I have my first session in early May, but that is ages away.... I’m running out of patience and tolerance for the prison that is my damn mind.

anom
25-03-18, 16:07
Hmm

I have some similiar things, I also considered if it was MS (My mum has had it for longer than I've existed!)

I've had - tingling in both legs and feet with what feels like a burning sensation inside although when you touch them they are normal. I've had it go into my hands sometimes too. I seem to be getting it more so on my left side which I find odd and worrying because my persistent bowel issue is on the left side so I'm putting 2 and 2 together..

At the moment, I feel more....sensitive to everything, I'm more jumpy..loud noises..can feel things..easier, a breeze, feel like im borderline shaking on the inside. When my heart beats sometimes its like my whole body beats with it and then I have a split second of dizziness to go with my newly found headache.

I've got a problem, I know ive got a bowel problem at the very least and its terrifying me, but what I'm finding is all my other ones seem to be anxiety based. It's like my body is wearing one part out then moving on, I rarely get the tingling in my legs/hands now..now I've moved onto dizziness/headaches (and I remember going to hospital when I was younger because I had stress induced headaches that felt similiar) Maybe its something, maybe its my lack of sleep but I really do think anxiety can do a right number on someone, unfortunately I have no idea how to get over it!

Ryzinn
25-03-18, 18:33
I noticed my right eye sight is not as good as my left (reading is blurrier when I cover my left eye) which has panicked me. I never noticed it before, but I returned to my old nemesis google and read that eye problems are a of symptom of early MS, so I did some tests and noticed it.


There you go feeding your own monster again.

I noticed similar things. Increase in eye floaters (which is still a thing to this day), blurred vision at times, eye pressure, eye aching, etc etc.

As I stated earlier, unless it's absolutely dramatic, it's not MS. Remember, a key feature of MS is failing. Failing to walk, failing to see, complete numbing of a body part for days on end (not minutes).

Can you still see? Is that one eye going blind? Chances are neither of those are the case. Therefore, youre fine.

Again, as stated in previous posts, I also had vision issues. Eye aches, blurred vision, flashes in my eyes when I would close them to go to sleep, Peripheral flashing spots, increase in floaters, all within one eye. Did it freak me out? Hell yes it did because at the time I was convinced something was wrong. Went to the eye doctor, nothing. Got an MRI, nothing.

There are SO many people out there who have similar stories. Stories of being absolutely convinced they had MS or other neurological diseases. Symptoms appearing even when they weren't anxious. The common thread between all of them was anxiety/fear/and the desire to just feel normal again.

You will feel normal again, but you have to let go, stop caring, and give it time. Get reassurance from your dr. and move on. Learn to have a symptom and say "Welp here we go again, just gotta wait it out and eventually it'll pass."

KM92
26-03-18, 01:21
I do seriously hope so, Iíve woken up tonight with the internal trembles in my chest. When I think what Ďsymptomsí this all came from it was pins and needles from the cold and at night s but, now Iím a full on Ďsickí shaky person who finds it hard to function at all. Iím so miserable, I will try and refrain from Doc Google today again :doh:

KM92
29-03-18, 02:16
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KM92
31-03-18, 10:19
So, I’ve seen two doctors who have told me I should not be worried MS (tested eye reflex, grip strength, observed my gait) it’s just my anxiety. I felt reassured for a day or two but I’m still really struggling with the internal tremors/vibrations. They keep me up at night and when I wake up experiencing them I go into panic and they get worse, no external signs at all though, no sweating, visible shaking, heart rate up... I’m trying to hard to just believe the doctor or but it’s been 2 weeks of this now and it keeps terrifying me, has anyone had this before and how long does it take to calm down?
I’m taking citrolopram now (only 4 days) and trying not to take diazepam.

Kingdawson
31-03-18, 13:11
Honestly speaking, if you can't take comfort with what both your doctors have said, what people on here who have experienced similar symptoms have said and you're still struggling then you will not get better. Maybe pay for a private MRI to put your mind at ease rather then repeating the never ending cycle of anxiety. When you get a clear mri you will know for certain you do not have MS and you can work on your anxiety and get better.