So angry with myself

[Emc]

I’ve been having a flare of my anxiety for the last 3 weeks or so, mainly related to some problems i’ve Been having with my bladder (needing to go ALL the time, urgency & some leaks when I don’t make it in time). I’d convinced myself I was retaining urine because of a spinal problem or pelvic tumour. Had a scan - empty bladder. Saw a gynaecologist privately today - pelvis fine. Happy just an overactive bladder with some incontinence due to babies.
That was all good. I came out of the appointment feeling positive & reassured.
Literally within an hour though my brain starts messing with me - firing doubts about the possibility of her missing something or it being something unrelated to my gynae system.
‘What if it’s a brain tumour?’ my brain threw out. So of course now my right arm feels strange, my vision seems odd & I feel a bit headachy & dizzy. Rationally this is all anxiety & my brain’s way of screwing everything up but I can’t get the symptoms to go away.
I’m so cross with myself. I knew this would happen & yet there was nothing I could do to stop it. Health anxiety really is such a dick.
Anyone else experience the same? O’m Guessing it’s not uncommon!

[Ascetic]

Definitely not uncommon. It is an especially difficult problem because it is so entrapping. We all know, deep down, that we are becoming our own worst enemies, yet we are not able to escape our less rational thoughts.

Without a healthier mindset you will always be reaching for reasons –*ones becoming less and less likely as time goes on –*that confirm your scariest suspicions.

Meditation may be a good path for you to go down, it helps you field your own thoughts and see them as just that: thoughts. The distance you can achieve from them through practiced meditation can be enough to distance yourself from their effects.

[deusvult]

I hear you. It's the worst when things are going ok, then a thought enters your mind and you can feel yourself slipping and you know that soon you will be a mess of anxiety.

Sometimes it feels like the harder you try, the faster you fall.

Just remember that no matter how bad things have been in the past, no matter how long the anxiety has lasted, you have always come through to the other side!