How to stop this demon inside

[Limeslime]

Argh! How do I stop this demon inside of me (HA) from growing? I’m still fairly new to this. I’ve been obsessive over breast cancer and melanoma for five months now. Just as I made progress with my BC fear, the melanoma fear started. Now, after a very tough and painful (physically!) journey, I’ve finally had TWO good days without obsessing about moles/melanoma. Just as I thought I was doing well, I remembered that my smear test is due, and now my brain wants to obsessively think about the possibility that I may be told I have cervical cancer! (A young mum I know died of this last year).
It’s just so, so hard. When will this HA cut me a break? It’s so hard feeling frightened every single day! I’m 34 with three children. I’m so scared of leaving them without a mum, it’s becoming all consuming.
Any tips to nip this cervical cancer fear in the bud before it grows like the other two fears did?

[Fishmanpa]

Any tips to nip this cervical cancer fear in the bud before it grows like the other two fears did?

Words on a screen are nothing unless acted upon. Professional real life help and meds if needed. You need accountability and follow up. Think of it like a job with assignments. You don't get paid until you complete the assignments.

Positive thoughts

[Limeslime]

Words on a screen are nothing unless acted upon. Professional real life help and meds if needed. You need accountability and follow up. Think of it like a job with assignments. You don't get paid until you complete the assignments.

Positive thoughts

My GP has me on sertraline. That’s it. The mental health services are stretched and I’m not high risk enough for a referral!

[Fishmanpa]

My GP has me on sertraline. That’s it. The mental health services are stretched and I’m not high risk enough for a referral!

The meds will help calm your mind and allow you to focus on the exercises. Check out this... (http://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=211324)

Positive thoughts

[cattia]

I'm with you. My smear is due in July but I managed to get them to agree to move it forward to May because I'm so freaked out over it. I have had HA my whole life but having kids definitely makes it worse. I also have three and on bad days I can cry just thinking about them growing up without me there.
It's especially hard when you personally know someone who has what you fear. However I try to tell myself that cervical cancer is still rare, especially if you've had normal smears in the past and have no symptoms.
Do you have the means to pay for counselling privately? I've just started doing this since the winter but it is expensive. How long have you been on meds?

[Limeslime]

I’ve had abnormal smears in the past (only CIN1)but the one I had last year was the first time I’d ever had a normal one! I’m on yearly smear tests because of my history which is great! I’m so lucky! But it doesn’t stop me feels big nervous!
No, I couldn’t possibly afford private councilling unfortunately �� it’s weird,I always feel like I just need to know my health is fine and then the dark feelings will just disappear. I’m gonna try the exercises from fish man and hope for the best

[cattia]

I think we all feel that way. If only there was a 100% assurance that we are healthy, we could get on with life. the trouble is I've learned that that is something that will never happen and as long as we are chasing it, we will always be in the trap of HA. I wish I had the answers as I am unable to figure out how to live peacefully with the possibility that we could always be at the start of a serious or terminal illness. However other people live happy and normal lives without this worry taking over so I know it must be possible! It sounds as though they are monitoring you very closely with regular smears so it is very unlikley that anything nasty could have developed in that time. The fact that you have not always suffered with HA is also really positive, since you know that it's possible to have a life where your worries don't dominate every day and you will find a way back there.