Dan21
19-07-07, 20:15
Hi there.
First of all, I think this might be a bit of a long post so sorry for rambling.
Since finishing uni almost six weeks ago I've been experiencing weird sorts of feelings that I'm praying are down to anxiety, I'm desperately trying to keep a logical head on my shoulders and not convince myself that I have a brain tumor or am about to have a stroke.
I have been working 110% through the year on my degree and it has paid off as I've come out with fantastic grades and have loved every minute of last academic year but I find it almost impossible to switch off. I had a really chronic speight of health anxiety about 18 months ago and it almost drove ,e to a breakdown. Luckily I managed to avoid that outcome and I truly believe that starting my degree was a wonderful thing as just about all of my attention was devoted to it and in some respect, I didnt have time to think about symptoms etc. But, ever since the end of the semester, I have been feeling pretty 'woosy'; sort of light headed, tired most of the time and what I can only describe as head rushes. It even happens when I go to bed which can be extremely scary. My wife says that she thinks it is at worst, vertigo and at best, anxiety.
But I cant get this through my head. I think I'm anxious as stuff is happening in my life that is pretty big right now. We are due to have our first baby at the end of August and to be honest with you all, I'm absolutely s**ting myself about what it will mean. This may sound very selfish but the feedback I'm getting in relation to my degree work (Fine Art) is very promising, I feel like I can take my art a very long way indeed. But, I'm terrified that all of my hard work I have put in (and still to put in) might be put in jepordy - many people have said that this might be the case. I've worked so hard and dont want to lose what I have. But on the other hand, I want to be the best father I can be and husband too.
So perhaps I am a little anxious??
Added to this, I have not really stopped working since last semester finished. I've been painting and working in a studio space as well as holding down a part time job. And, without wanting to sound like I'm milking it, I'm running around like a headless chicken trying to keep the house running as my wife is getting pretty big now........
So the head rushes feel like a cross between a buzzing sensation for a few seconds and being stood on a merry go round. They come and go, as does the dizziness by itself - sometimes that comes on when I'm simply sat down which again frightens the socks off me. I keep trying to tell myself that I'm probably just tired and that I need to slow down but its almost like there is some kind of mania that has me in its grip, almost like I cant sit still. I had a really bad flu like cold about two weeks ago that knocked me off my feet and I was in bed for almost two days. Without wanting to sound too gross, I've still got a residual snotty head and I wonder if this too might be contributing to the symptoms?? I'm just terrified that as most of these symptoms seem to be around my head that I might have something dangerously wrong with me.........a tumour, a blockage in my brain that might result in a stroke (dont smoke or drink heavily) and to be honest instead of getting really excited about the birth of our baby, I'm feeling the worry of what will happen in relation to my work (am I being a selfish arse by worrying about that?????) and also freaking out that instead of these symptoms being caused by anxiety, there might be genuinely something wrong with me.......
First of all, I think this might be a bit of a long post so sorry for rambling.
Since finishing uni almost six weeks ago I've been experiencing weird sorts of feelings that I'm praying are down to anxiety, I'm desperately trying to keep a logical head on my shoulders and not convince myself that I have a brain tumor or am about to have a stroke.
I have been working 110% through the year on my degree and it has paid off as I've come out with fantastic grades and have loved every minute of last academic year but I find it almost impossible to switch off. I had a really chronic speight of health anxiety about 18 months ago and it almost drove ,e to a breakdown. Luckily I managed to avoid that outcome and I truly believe that starting my degree was a wonderful thing as just about all of my attention was devoted to it and in some respect, I didnt have time to think about symptoms etc. But, ever since the end of the semester, I have been feeling pretty 'woosy'; sort of light headed, tired most of the time and what I can only describe as head rushes. It even happens when I go to bed which can be extremely scary. My wife says that she thinks it is at worst, vertigo and at best, anxiety.
But I cant get this through my head. I think I'm anxious as stuff is happening in my life that is pretty big right now. We are due to have our first baby at the end of August and to be honest with you all, I'm absolutely s**ting myself about what it will mean. This may sound very selfish but the feedback I'm getting in relation to my degree work (Fine Art) is very promising, I feel like I can take my art a very long way indeed. But, I'm terrified that all of my hard work I have put in (and still to put in) might be put in jepordy - many people have said that this might be the case. I've worked so hard and dont want to lose what I have. But on the other hand, I want to be the best father I can be and husband too.
So perhaps I am a little anxious??
Added to this, I have not really stopped working since last semester finished. I've been painting and working in a studio space as well as holding down a part time job. And, without wanting to sound like I'm milking it, I'm running around like a headless chicken trying to keep the house running as my wife is getting pretty big now........
So the head rushes feel like a cross between a buzzing sensation for a few seconds and being stood on a merry go round. They come and go, as does the dizziness by itself - sometimes that comes on when I'm simply sat down which again frightens the socks off me. I keep trying to tell myself that I'm probably just tired and that I need to slow down but its almost like there is some kind of mania that has me in its grip, almost like I cant sit still. I had a really bad flu like cold about two weeks ago that knocked me off my feet and I was in bed for almost two days. Without wanting to sound too gross, I've still got a residual snotty head and I wonder if this too might be contributing to the symptoms?? I'm just terrified that as most of these symptoms seem to be around my head that I might have something dangerously wrong with me.........a tumour, a blockage in my brain that might result in a stroke (dont smoke or drink heavily) and to be honest instead of getting really excited about the birth of our baby, I'm feeling the worry of what will happen in relation to my work (am I being a selfish arse by worrying about that?????) and also freaking out that instead of these symptoms being caused by anxiety, there might be genuinely something wrong with me.......