My anxiety is back with a vengeance gutted as been off meds 3 months

[Mumzy]

I stopped my meds (escitalopram 5mg) 14 weeks ago now. Was on them for 13 years. 6 months before I stopped them I was taking 1 every 2-3 days. And prior to this was taking them every other day for 6 months. My doctor said it’d be fine to stop them when I did as I’d weaned off them so slow and the dose was very minimal.

I was fine. Or so I thought.

2 weeks ago whilst driving I felt very dizzy all of a sudden for no apparent reason and this made me feel really panicky. Since then I’ve dreaded driving ‘just in case’ it happens again, which it has done a couple of times. I absolutely HATE driving at the moment and this is very unlike me. I have no choice but to drive though!

Friday I was walking back to my car from Pre school drop off and one of the mums was chatting to me whilst we were walking. All of a sudden I felt sooooo dizzy, like I was drunk, my heart was beating fast, I felt trembly, very disorientated, my eyes were twitching and I just wanted to run away from her. (She’s a lovely woman). I cried when I got back into the car. Then I had to go to work.
Everything seems to be getting difficult for me at the moment....the school runs, when I get out the car to do the Pre School drop off, food shopping, work, everything that’s a ‘normal’ day to day routine really. I can be just walking and feel like I’m going off balance. This makes me so sad. I’ve cried a lot about this. I’ve told my husband how I’m feeling who’s sympathetic towards the situation though doesn’t know what to suggest, understandable.

He did suggest why don’t I go back on my medication. But then I’m in a catch 22 as I know when I first start taking them they make me feel awful for a while, and then I really won’t be able to drive my children to school so am thinking if that’s going to be the only option I’ll have to wait til the summer holidays but that’s 7 weeks away yet.

I really don’t know what to do/try for the best!
How can I be 14 weeks med free then it suddenly hit me like this!

Grateful for any input :)

[Aquilega]

Hi @Mumzy I and many others feel exactly the same I feel drunk as you put it 24/7 and have been for many years,I know it is GAD and I feel completely knackered every day I just feel like laying in bed,but I don't ,it does pass for a few weeks but then it comes back with a vengeance but at least I get the occasional break you have to keep doing the things you normally do,Anxiety is a bully,it is extremely difficult to carry on every day,but that is the choice we have,at the moment ,I have my usual headache,upset tummy and light headed and feeling very sorry for myself ,I am sorry that you feel like you do my friend,and I also know how we say to ourselves no one else feels as bad as I do,but there are 100's if not 1000's,I don't post much on here because that makes me feel worse,but I just had to answer your post my friend

[NervousKel]

Mumzy, I wonder if it could be some lingering side effects of weaning off the meds? Even though it's been three months?

I know what you mean about putting off starting the meds again; I just switched to Escitalopram after 5 years on Citalopram, and it took me 7 weeks to get up the courage to make the switch, due to my fear of possible side effects. Ironically, I feel calmer today after finally forcing myself to take the new med this morning.

[anxiousjomo]

Sounds like a blip from withdrawal to me - It was a good 3-4 months for me since stopping meds I had been on for years before I stopped having the odd thing like you describe.
Even a very small dose for that length of time is altering your brain chemistry, so it is inevitable that there will be some odd effects from time to time. Just don't let it worry you. It is a normal part of the process of your brain adapting to its new reality. You have done really well to get this far, and just need to ride out these last few bumps.