PDA

View Full Version : New Puppy anxiety



Emma_t12
29-05-18, 09:15
Hi everyone
I have suffered with anxiety for 10+ years. Some times I’m okay and other times I’m not. I used to be so bad I couldn’t leave the house, travel anywhere or get a bus etc. I got through it with counselling and was prescribed citalopram by didn’t take it. This was a few years ago and my anxiety has become better since then.
I am looking for help because I got a 10 week old puppy on Friday and it has triggered my anxiety really badly. I thought having a dog would help but while he’s a puppy I don’t think it is. I wake up each morning with a sick feeling. We are putting him in a crate at night and he has accidents in there and cries and it makes me so anxious, I’m anxious about his toilet training too. I have a week off work this week and I’m anxious as next week I go back to work and the rest of the family will have to look after him. I just feel like I want to cry all the time, it’s so overwhelming. I’ve never had a dog before and I just can’t wait to get past the puppy stage. Everyday I feel so anxious and upset I just feel like it was a mistake getting him even though he’s quite good I just want this anxious feeling to go away. I hate changes in routine so this has been really hard for me and it’s only been 4 days so far. Please people who have got puppies will it get easier?
He is so attached to me and follows me everywhere and I just feel really sad as I don’t feel like I love him that much yet because he’s causeing me so much anxiety. I also can’t go out with him for walks yet so just feel a bit lonely.

Any advice please? Anyone who has felt the same way? Anyone who has had a puppy can tell me it gets easier? I just feel so sad :(

Bigboyuk
29-05-18, 09:44
Hi everyone
I have suffered with anxiety for 10+ years. Some times I’m okay and other times I’m not. I used to be so bad I couldn’t leave the house, travel anywhere or get a bus etc. I got through it with counselling and was prescribed citalopram by didn’t take it. This was a few years ago and my anxiety has become better since then.
I am looking for help because I got a 10 week old puppy on Friday and it has triggered my anxiety really badly. I thought having a dog would help but while he’s a puppy I don’t think it is. I wake up each morning with a sick feeling. We are putting him in a crate at night and he has accidents in there and cries and it makes me so anxious, I’m anxious about his toilet training too. I have a week off work this week and I’m anxious as next week I go back to work and the rest of the family will have to look after him. I just feel like I want to cry all the time, it’s so overwhelming. I’ve never had a dog before and I just can’t wait to get past the puppy stage. Everyday I feel so anxious and upset I just feel like it was a mistake getting him even though he’s quite good I just want this anxious feeling to go away. I hate changes in routine so this has been really hard for me and it’s only been 4 days so far. Please people who have got puppies will it get easier?
He is so attached to me and follows me everywhere and I just feel really sad as I don’t feel like I love him that much yet because he’s causeing me so much anxiety. I also can’t go out with him for walks yet so just feel a bit lonely.

Any advice please? Anyone who has felt the same way? Anyone who has had a puppy can tell me it gets easier? I just feel so sad :(
Hi Emma congrats on the new addition :) Yes been through the puppy stage my self and now got a beautiful well trained, loyal, loving companion who is now just turned 10 years old :) and at times I wanted to re home her but I stuck with it. Puppies will cry and it's normal as don't forget he has only just left his mum and maybe some brothers and sisters. Ok here's a few tips.

Re toilet training (and any training for that matter) you have to get a routine going and stick with it. a puppy's bladder at 10 weeks old is pretty small and will need regular trips to the loo. so I would say every 20 mins would be ideal. Any mess in the crate clean it up with a enzematic cleaner as he will keep using the crate for that. And dogs don't like being in their mess, each time he does go out side go OTT and praise,praise,praise and reward with a tasty treat treats are very useful for helping any training to get locked in the pups mind quicker.

As for the crying get a old ticking clock and T shirt with your body scent on and put the ticking clock underneath the bedding (this will resemble the mothers heartbeat) and on top of the bedding put the T shirt this will reassure him that you haven't left him as he will smell a familiar smell :)

Yes it will get miles easier too put the work in and train well and you will have a great companion. What breed is he? Good luck and any further questions please don't hesitate to ask:yesyes: ATB

palomine91
29-05-18, 10:12
Congrats on the new puppy!! :)

I too got a puppy a couple of months ago from a drug addict, the dog was in terrible condition but after a couple months of love and care she is starting to act normal again.
Having a puppy, at times, is worse than having a baby! Lol she still messes in the house at 4 months old but perseverance is defo the key and to echo what BigBoy said, really congratulate them when they do their business outside. The puppy will start to stop whining and whinging at night but you just have to stick with it and kind of ignore it like you would with a child. If you have kids then the tricks and tips you used with settling them will usually work with a puppy.

Good Luck!

S

Bigboyuk
29-05-18, 10:46
Congrats on the new puppy!! :)

I too got a puppy a couple of months ago from a drug addict, the dog was in terrible condition but after a couple months of love and care she is starting to act normal again.
Having a puppy, at times, is worse than having a baby! Lol she still messes in the house at 4 months old but perseverance is defo the key and to echo what BigBoy said, really congratulate them when they do their business outside. The puppy will start to stop whining and whinging at night but you just have to stick with it and kind of ignore it like you would with a child. If you have kids then the tricks and tips you used with settling them will usually work with a puppy.

Good Luck!

S Hey Kudos to you mate for rescuing this dog ;) I can imagine the state she was in, some people are scum bags. I can guess the breed, was it a staffy bull!!? In your case 4 months is quite long and (not blaming you) but she should be potty trained by now, so step up the walks and number of times she needs to go out, and look for signs constant sniffing of the floor circling round are good indicators that she needs to go :) ATB with your puppy and good luck.

palomine91
29-05-18, 10:49
You got it in one lol she is a staff crossed with a boxer i think. Yeah she has got a lot better than she was, just the occasional one now and again but when she is constantly sniffing the floor, i let her out for a good 10 mins but she doesn't do anything lol. I think the walks need upping and for a longer period of time.

Cheers, S

Phuzella
29-05-18, 10:58
Put yourself in puppy's shoes. He's only 10 weeks old and has been used to being surrounded by his mum and siblings. Now he's all alone in a new scary (in his eyes) place. He's looking to you for help in sorting all this new stuff out.
Make allowances for toilet accidents. He knows no different. Socialise him gently with new people. Take it easy with him. It will get easier but will take time. You and he will learn together :)

Bigboyuk
29-05-18, 11:27
You got it in one lol she is a staff crossed with a boxer i think. Yeah she has got a lot better than she was, just the occasional one now and again but when she is constantly sniffing the floor, i let her out for a good 10 mins but she doesn't do anything lol. I think the walks need upping and for a longer period of time.

Cheers, S Call it intuition LOL Well perhaps when you do let her out encourage her to go (and go out side with her) like say do pee pee and reward with lots of praise and a treat! A lot of time it is user error and not the dogs fault ;) Yeah spot on, up the walks and amount of time too ATB

---------- Post added at 11:27 ---------- Previous post was at 11:24 ----------


Put yourself in puppy's shoes. He's only 10 weeks old and has been used to being surrounded by his mum and siblings. Now he's all alone in a new scary (in his eyes) place. He's looking to you for help in sorting all this new stuff out.
Make allowances for toilet accidents. He knows no different. Socialise him gently with new people. Take it easy with him. It will get easier but will take time. You and he will learn together :) Yes spot on Phuzella and will add social with other dogs too ( they are pack animals) and get the puppy acustomised with new sounds too like the hoover doors banging etc and handle the puppy all over so it comes used to being handled by say a vet etc :) ATB

Emma_t12
29-05-18, 11:57
Thank you everyone. I know what you’re saying is true I just think when you’re an anxious. person anyway the puppy situation seems so much worse than it is and just makes me feel so stressed out! Thank you all though it’s so much better getting reassuring words

BexieB
29-05-18, 16:15
Hi Emma

I understand exactly how you feel. I had a severe bout of anxiety about 10 years ago, after I got a new cat. He was a rescue and would cry at night when I left him alone. I just felt so trapped, because I knew I would never bring him back to the shelter. My anxiety was telling me this would never stop, he would always be like this. I had horrible thoughts, like wishing he’d wander off and not come back. But I know that was just the anxiety trying to find a way out. Your anxious mind is like a trapped animal, desperate and illogical.

The reality of your situation is that your puppy is the same as all animals in a new environment. He will be unsettled. He behaviour is 100% what to expect. And it follows on that it is highly likely that these behaviours will disappear as your home becomes his home.

My cat died last year, he was such a special little guy and I think about him everyday.

Bigboyuk
31-05-18, 14:17
Hi Emma hows the puppy getting on and how are you coping now, better I hope :) ATB

Twisted-Melody
01-06-18, 11:38
Hi Emma,

I have a 9 month puppy and I felt just like you in the first month. We drove 4-5 hours to collect him and I was fine the whole way. As soon as he walked through the door, I panicked and stressed SO much I couldn't even look at him and felt really sick. I had to leave it to my partner to look after him the first few days. But a few weeks later, it got easier... Crying stopped (on both sides!), we could make it through the night without toilet breaks etc. Then, he got crate anxiety and wouldn't go in. This made going to bed difficult and stressful. It took weeks to get him back where he was. Meanwhile, he suffers from mild separation anxiety so whenever we go anywhere, he's crying. He's very clingy too, and I am a very independent person (also, never had a dog before) so I've found, and still find it difficult at times.

Anyway, I wanted to write to you to let you know you aren't alone. I'm still not sure if I love my puppy, but these bonds take time to form. I'm quite wary of letting anyone or anything close to my heart, but I certainly care about my puppy and want to make sure he's happy and safe. I still have doubtful days, though, wondering if I'm doing the right thing in keeping him, but instead of them being every day, it's now a few days a month. I generally enjoy having him around, but sometimes when things go wrong I begin to worry.

Please don't do what I did and google every single issue with the pup. Go to the vet or get a behaviourist or trainer to help. Also, take your pup to doggy day care and go out and have some time for you away from pup. Make adjusting to having a little one in the house a little easier. We've cut down on cooking, for example, which gives us more free time for pup and ourselves.

Be prepared for the people who put dogs over people in forums. They don't know you and can be very judgemental. I've had some awful advice from people even though I said I felt suicidal (yes, the first few months were very tough for me). Surround yourself with loved ones instead who care more about you than the pup and it'll feel easier.

Now, we're at 9 months, our puppy is approaching adolescence and forgetting everything! He's going into the neighbours garden and running off. He's also started crying in his crate again, but it's not as bad as it was. For us, the first few months were tough, then it got easier, then I wanted to get rid of him more than ever, and now I seem to have settled and accepted him, but now ADOLESCENCE! I hear it can last up to 18 months old, which puts a lot of doubt in me, but I'm trying to keep things simpler... less stimulating walks, less snacks, more training etc. Some days it just doesn't happen, so I'll take a break and go out.

Some good advice I heard: "A happy owner, makes a happy dog." Please put yourself first and try not to worry too much about the puppy. I hope it gets better for you and I'm happy to help if you want to message me :)

Bigboyuk
01-06-18, 12:03
Hi Emma,

I have a 9 month puppy and I felt just like you in the first month. We drove 4-5 hours to collect him and I was fine the whole way. As soon as he walked through the door, I panicked and stressed SO much I couldn't even look at him and felt really sick. I had to leave it to my partner to look after him the first few days. But a few weeks later, it got easier... Crying stopped (on both sides!), we could make it through the night without toilet breaks etc. Then, he got crate anxiety and wouldn't go in. This made going to bed difficult and stressful. It took weeks to get him back where he was. Meanwhile, he suffers from mild separation anxiety so whenever we go anywhere, he's crying. He's very clingy too, and I am a very independent person (also, never had a dog before) so I've found, and still find it difficult at times.

Anyway, I wanted to write to you to let you know you aren't alone. I'm still not sure if I love my puppy, but these bonds take time to form. I'm quite wary of letting anyone or anything close to my heart, but I certainly care about my puppy and want to make sure he's happy and safe. I still have doubtful days, though, wondering if I'm doing the right thing in keeping him, but instead of them being every day, it's now a few days a month. I generally enjoy having him around, but sometimes when things go wrong I begin to worry.

Please don't do what I did and google every single issue with the pup. Go to the vet or get a behaviourist or trainer to help. Also, take your pup to doggy day care and go out and have some time for you away from pup. Make adjusting to having a little one in the house a little easier. We've cut down on cooking, for example, which gives us more free time for pup and ourselves.

Be prepared for the people who put dogs over people in forums. They don't know you and can be very judgemental. I've had some awful advice from people even though I said I felt suicidal (yes, the first few months were very tough for me). Surround yourself with loved ones instead who care more about you than the pup and it'll feel easier.

Now, we're at 9 months, our puppy is approaching adolescence and forgetting everything! He's going into the neighbours garden and running off. He's also started crying in his crate again, but it's not as bad as it was. For us, the first few months were tough, then it got easier, then I wanted to get rid of him more than ever, and now I seem to have settled and accepted him, but now ADOLESCENCE! I hear it can last up to 18 months old, which puts a lot of doubt in me, but I'm trying to keep things simpler... less stimulating walks, less snacks, more training etc. Some days it just doesn't happen, so I'll take a break and go out.

Some good advice I heard: "A happy owner, makes a happy dog." Please put yourself first and try not to worry too much about the puppy. I hope it gets better for you and I'm happy to help if you want to message me :) Hi TM congrats on your puppy Just a little word I have had my dog who is now just over 10 years more loving and loyal than a lot of humans I have come in contact with who have really hurt me in many ways so sorry atm I much prefer my dog to humans they don't stab you in the back. Any way moving on :) It boils down to training puppies simply don't grow out of unwanted behaviour. I mean it's a personal choice but at 9 months old should he really be crated? Or at least spend less time in his crate? I would have thought more stimulating walks would be the way forward and yes agree more training like a solid recall high value treats will really help on this and speed up the progress :)

Seperation Anxiety is quite common in pups mine had it too, this is how I corrected this simply leave the house/room for a few secs then return don't over fuss the dog keep doing this and gradually increase the number of times you leave the house and the length of time you are out of the house and over a month or so you could be away for a few hrs and no SA ;) Also has he got plenty of toys to keep him occupied while you are out. try getting a treat ball that you fill with treats he has to work out with his nose nudging the ball round the room to get the treats out lol Dogs love a challenge keeps their mind healthy
and active and the saying goes a tired dog is a happy dog:yesyes: You will bond with your dog and when you do it's truly amazing experience. I meant to ask do you both work and how long each day? ATB

Twisted-Melody
01-06-18, 12:25
Hi TM congrats on your puppy Just a little word I have had my dog who is now just over 10 years more loving and loyal than a lot of humans I have come in contact with who have really hurt me in many ways so sorry atm I much prefer my dog to humans they don't stab you in the back. Any way moving on :) It boils down to training puppies simply don't grow out of unwanted behaviour. I mean it's a personal choice but at 9 months old should he really be crated? Or at least spend less time in his crate? I would have thought more stimulating walks would be the way forward and yes agree more training like a solid recall high value treats will really help on this and speed up the progress :)

Seperation Anxiety is quite common in pups mine had it too, this is how I corrected this simply leave the house/room for a few secs then return don't over fuss the dog keep doing this and gradually increase the number of times you leave the house and the length of time you are out of the house and over a month or so you could be away for a few hrs and no SA ;) Also has he got plenty of toys to keep him occupied while you are out. try getting a treat ball that you fill with treats he has to work out with his nose nudging the ball round the room to get the treats out lol Dogs love a challenge keeps their mind healthy
and active and the saying goes a tired dog is a happy dog:yesyes: ATB

His separation anxiety has resulted in chewing the walls and clawing at doors when we leave him (we live in rented apartment). We'd leave him in the kitchen (where to crate is) with the crate door open. We give him food puzzles and toys every time we leave (and have also tried leaving just for a small time/ blanket training), but unless it's a peanut butter stuffed kong, he'll just leave it every time and cry/ howl. He settles in 5-10 mins and goes to sleep in his crate. Since the recent wall destruction, we're crating him again when we're out.

Over-night, he's crated as routine and to ensure he doesn't get up to any mischief. We also don't want him waking us up/ being needy.

I work at home and am near him most of the day/ every day. I think perhaps this is making it worse because most other dogs HAVE to get used to their owners being out. I go to therapy and work out of the house once a week (only for a few hours) and leave him when I buy groceries, so it's hard to train him up to being left alone for a few hours since I have commitments. It feels like the training we've tried gets undone because we still need to leave sometimes.

Our trainer has advised us to keep walks simple and familiar. We were obsessed with socialising him that we went somewhere new every day, but he'd become unresponsive after the first 5-10 minutes. His negative behaviours like jumping at everyone, barking and pulling at dogs then become uncontrollable and he self-rewards. His recall's now 0% too, so we're working on building it back up so he can have fun off leash again.

But I don't want to divert or scare OP! We've picked a tricky breed and we've never had a dog before so we're both learning a lot.

Bigboyuk
01-06-18, 12:46
His separation anxiety has resulted in chewing the walls and clawing at doors when we leave him (we live in rented apartment). We'd leave him in the kitchen (where to crate is) with the crate door open. We give him food puzzles and toys every time we leave (and have also tried leaving just for a small time/ blanket training), but unless it's a peanut butter stuffed kong, he'll just leave it every time and cry/ howl. He settles in 5-10 mins and goes to sleep in his crate. Since the recent wall destruction, we're crating him again when we're out.

Over-night, he's crated as routine and to ensure he doesn't get up to any mischief. We also don't want him waking us up/ being needy.

I work at home and am near him most of the day/ every day. I think perhaps this is making it worse because most other dogs HAVE to get used to their owners being out. I go to therapy and work out of the house once a week (only for a few hours) and leave him when I buy groceries, so it's hard to train him up to being left alone for a few hours since I have commitments. It feels like the training we've tried gets undone because we still need to leave sometimes.

Our trainer has advised us to keep walks simple and familiar. We were obsessed with socialising him that we went somewhere new every day, but he'd become unresponsive after the first 5-10 minutes. His negative behaviours like jumping at everyone, barking and pulling at dogs then become uncontrollable and he self-rewards. His recall's now 0% too, so we're working on building it back up so he can have fun off leash again.

But I don't want to divert or scare OP! We've picked a tricky breed and we've never had a dog before so we're both learning a lot. Hmm Ok I think it's a mixture of SA and boredom What I did was put mustard on so far up the door frames etc and a few bites of that and my dog stopped really quickly or you can buy no chew spray it's very bitter to the taste and he will soon learn. As he gets older the habit will be harder to break. Do you have a trusted neighbour/friend that can dog sit while you are out? Yes agree dogs like a routine but again nothing wrong with new walks meeting new dogs. Re jumping up I have a strict rule people can pet my dog so long as my dog is on all four paws as soon as the jumping up starts turn you back on him and ignore totally. Hey nothing wrong with being obsessed with socialising him with other dogs the window for this is 8-16 weeks and becomes harder to set in stone but it's do able.

Can you explain what you mean by self rewards? As for 0% recall you need to go back to basics either in your house or secure yard/garden let him off let him sniff and basically be a dog lol then have a tasty treat (high value) chicken pieces or cut up hot dogs learnt that off a dog forum I joined 9 years ago, then in a happy high pitched voice call him back to you and praise, praise, praise pet him and reward with that high value treat the keys to success is consistency and repetition while training

You mention you have a tricky breed I think I know what it is lol but you can say ATB

Laura123
03-06-18, 10:03
Hi Emma. I’m a complete dog lover, I have two, a wee Yorkie who is 10 and a complete diva and a Labrador who is 5 that I rescued at 10 months. My dogs are one of my biggest positives for my mental health. They make me walk every day, they know when I feel bad and they try to comfort me, they make me smile every single day and are so funny, for me, dogs are such a tonic and when I’m feeling stressed justchaving my hands on my lab especially just calms me. All this said, when they are babies they are stressful, so stressful and you think they will never be calm or trained etc but they do settle down and it gets easier as you get to know your dog, once your puppy is grown you will have such a great companion.

Bigboyuk
03-06-18, 15:04
Hi Emma. I’m a complete dog lover, I have two, a wee Yorkie who is 10 and a complete diva and a Labrador who is 5 that I rescued at 10 months. My dogs are one of my biggest positives for my mental health. They make me walk every day, they know when I feel bad and they try to comfort me, they make me smile every single day and are so funny, for me, dogs are such a tonic and when I’m feeling stressed justchaving my hands on my lab especially just calms me. All this said, when they are babies they are stressful, so stressful and you think they will never be calm or trained etc but they do settle down and it gets easier as you get to know your dog, once your puppy is grown you will have such a great companion.Yes same here Laura my dog was a puppy 10 years ago and boy was it stressful to say the least it got that bad I was going to re home her, searched online for a good dogforum found one and the support from the others was great gave me good tips/advice along the way so glad they did help me and now I have a well balanced dog but it took a lot of hard work that's for sure would I train again this way I was shown in the past, absolutely and for years on that forum I have offered my advice and tips too so it's all good :yesyes: ATB

Emma_t12
26-07-18, 15:59
Hi Emma,

I have a 9 month puppy and I felt just like you in the first month. We drove 4-5 hours to collect him and I was fine the whole way. As soon as he walked through the door, I panicked and stressed SO much I couldn't even look at him and felt really sick. I had to leave it to my partner to look after him the first few days. But a few weeks later, it got easier... Crying stopped (on both sides!), we could make it through the night without toilet breaks etc. Then, he got crate anxiety and wouldn't go in. This made going to bed difficult and stressful. It took weeks to get him back where he was. Meanwhile, he suffers from mild separation anxiety so whenever we go anywhere, he's crying. He's very clingy too, and I am a very independent person (also, never had a dog before) so I've found, and still find it difficult at times.

Anyway, I wanted to write to you to let you know you aren't alone. I'm still not sure if I love my puppy, but these bonds take time to form. I'm quite wary of letting anyone or anything close to my heart, but I certainly care about my puppy and want to make sure he's happy and safe. I still have doubtful days, though, wondering if I'm doing the right thing in keeping him, but instead of them being every day, it's now a few days a month. I generally enjoy having him around, but sometimes when things go wrong I begin to worry.

Please don't do what I did and google every single issue with the pup. Go to the vet or get a behaviourist or trainer to help. Also, take your pup to doggy day care and go out and have some time for you away from pup. Make adjusting to having a little one in the house a little easier. We've cut down on cooking, for example, which gives us more free time for pup and ourselves.

Be prepared for the people who put dogs over people in forums. They don't know you and can be very judgemental. I've had some awful advice from people even though I said I felt suicidal (yes, the first few months were very tough for me). Surround yourself with loved ones instead who care more about you than the pup and it'll feel easier.

Now, we're at 9 months, our puppy is approaching adolescence and forgetting everything! He's going into the neighbours garden and running off. He's also started crying in his crate again, but it's not as bad as it was. For us, the first few months were tough, then it got easier, then I wanted to get rid of him more than ever, and now I seem to have settled and accepted him, but now ADOLESCENCE! I hear it can last up to 18 months old, which puts a lot of doubt in me, but I'm trying to keep things simpler... less stimulating walks, less snacks, more training etc. Some days it just doesn't happen, so I'll take a break and go out.

Some good advice I heard: "A happy owner, makes a happy dog." Please put yourself first and try not to worry too much about the puppy. I hope it gets better for you and I'm happy to help if you want to message me :)


Thank you so much for this message, its honestly just what i needed to read. Everything you have written I relate to and I thought my feelings were "over the top" but now I know others have felt it too I don't feel so stupid. I just feel i have no patience with him. He's now 5 months old so I have had him just over 2 months and things are getting easier, we have a bedtime routine etc but my anxiety is still very high. I guess what scares me is if i will always feel like this. Your message has really really helped me thank you so much x

---------- Post added at 15:59 ---------- Previous post was at 15:52 ----------


Hi Emma hows the puppy getting on and how are you coping now, better I hope :) ATB


Hi everyone, my puppy is now 19 weeks old. Some days are good, some are not so good but i guess you get that with all aspects of life. He goes to sleep in his crate really well now and doesn't cry. He will sleep 11pm-6am, i sometimes take him out for a wee at 4am but other times i don't. Does anyone know when i should stop waking up in the night to take him out?
My anxiety still isn't great, i worry about the smallest things with him and then take my bad mood out on my family who are only doing a great job with him but because its not the exact thing i wanted them to do i am snappy with them.
He recently went to a dog sitter because i had no one at home for him which he loved, i think i will look into doing that more often to socialise him and to give me time to myself. He's still very clingy to me.
The part I am finding the hardest is the walks. He won't walk out of the house unless i put treats on the ground. It still takes around an hour to complete a ten minute walk. I am so frustrated with the fact he won't walk. If we drive somewhere away from the house such as a park, then he walks relatively normally but he just will not walk out the house and away from the house. Once we have got to a park or where ever he will very happily walk all the way home normally. Im really struggling with this as it feels like I'm not making any progress. Surely he should be better by now at 19 weeks. I had a real low point the other day where he wouldn't walk down a road he normally walks down and I just ended up crying on the street, its so stressful I dont know what to do for the best. I think i will look into puppy training classes but not sure how much that will help?

Also ATB i work every day 8-4 but i live at home and my parents look after him during the day so he's not left hardly ever. I think he's been left once for 3 hours since we got him. Should i be leaving him on his own more to help him get used to it?

Thank you all for your reassuring messages.

Emma_t12
23-09-18, 12:46
Just bumping up this thread for any replies :)

Pipkin
23-09-18, 16:05
Emma,

Sorry I missed your original posts. You're doing the right things and I can certainly relate to how you're feeling. Getting a puppy is so hard - they are needy and often behave exactly the opposite to how you want. I felt terrible for the first few weeks when our first 10-week old arrived. It just turned my life upside down and I thought I would never get used to it. Unsurprisingly, 6 years on and I wouldn't be without my dogs. We now have two and they are fully part of our family. They have helped my anxiety so much, and the unconditional affection and love they show is amazing.

What I found that helped was training classes. We took both of ours from 10 weeks to a year old and it really helped them to socialise and learn right from wrong. Most importantly, it showed us how to deal with difficult situations and to understand what's going on in their doggy minds. We now have two (generally) well-behaved dogs who are really affectionate and loving.

The most important lesson of all is to have a routine. It helps the dogs but also helps to settle you. Your dog has joined your family and needs to fit in with you all but it's realistic to accept that you'll have to make some changes. Agree on a routine that works for you all and stick to it. The stability will help your dog and your anxiety. Honestly, that was the turning point for me.

It may seem that the puppy behaviour lasts forever (the exact length depends on the individual dog and breed) but they soon grow up and you'll be as exasperated by trying to get him out of bed for a walk as you are now with the excess energy and attention seeking.

In terms of house training, don't put pressure on yourself or your little dog. It takes different amounts of time for different dogs. Follow the usual steps of taking him out first thing in the morning, after meals and at night time. My preference is not to use puppy pads as this teaches them that it's ok to go inside but other people say it works. Either way, he will soon learn what to do, even though you will have a few accidents along the way. Our first dog was amazing and knew instinctively what to do. We never had an accident in the house. The second dog was a nightmare and it took us well over six months to train him. It's stressful but all you need to do is persevere and remember that he will get it. All dogs do. Some just take longer than others.

Stick with your furry friend and, in no time at all, he will be the best companion you ever had.

Good luck

Pip