Afraid I have have a septate hymen

[crazygal]

I've doing good withy healthy anxiety for the past 7 months. Haven't had any slip ups or anything. But I'm now back at square one.

I'm 30 years old and a virgin. Recently I've decided to give it. My whole life I never tried inserting anything. I grew in a religious household where it was deemed sinful.

Anyways I recently decided that it's foolish to wait until I'm married to do the deed. I'm not getting any younger.

I tried using a tampon for the first time in my life ( tampons were also grown d upon for unmarried women in my religion) and I couldn't insert it. I tried twice and soon as I started pushing it in it got really painful.

I googled it and it seems some women have thick hymen that need to be surgically removed.

I broke down crying and freaking out. Because it requires surgery to remove it.

I'm so depressed and scared now. I'm in full anxiety mode now.

I don't know how to do deal with this. And I'm so scared of going to the gyno because I feel like she's just going to confirm my fears.

[MyNameIsTerry]

I'm sure some of the women on here will be along to help you soon, they will understand this more than I ever could, but first time sex can even be like this due to tensing because the woman is so nervous. That could be the case in experimentation too.

So, before jumping to conclusions, and given what you mentioned about the pressures on you about this always having been wrong per your upbringing, I think this needs consideration.

Also a hymen needing surgery is because it is preventing menstrual fluid from escaping or slowing it down. So if you have no issues like that then it would suggest it's not this.

Please don't feel ashamed.

[Pkstracy]

Of course it's going to be painful. You were probably tensing your muscles, and a tampon is not a good thing to start with. I would recommend doing a search for my first "toy"

[welsh girl]

If you feel you can wait till your wedding night, why not????
I believe even in this day and age men like to think they are the first, and that is a sure way of proving it,
I was a virgin on my wedding night,and I was relaxed on the second night which was not the case on the first, I tried what you did and it was hopeless,
Love or excitement preferably both is the answer, believe me,