View Full Version : Holiday in Italy
I want to go a holiday to Italy next year but don’t like flying or long train journeys. Like I hate having to go to a toilet on a train so I avoid that but it would be around 7 hours from Paris to Milan. Flying I hate but I did fly to Spain s few months back but I stress for months before it so I don’t like booking flights but it is quicker.
What should I Do? Train wise it’s easy to go to France and Belgium ect but when you want Spain or Italy it takes longer by train :ohmy:
MyNameIsTerry
05-06-18, 17:07
Not considering the anxiety side of this for a minute, Phil, is there any options where you could travel in two parts and see two or more places as your holiday?
Not considering the anxiety side of this for a minute, Phil, is there any options where you could travel in two parts and see two or more places as your holiday?
It’s for a honeymoon but I have a few issues not just travel time the heat is likely to be 30 degrees or more if I go in summer so that’s not ideal.
Flying I would give Milan a miss and see Venice and Rome. I could do this in 4 days with the flights I’ve never really had a holiday longer than 5 days as I like my home comforts. The train may take around 7 days off my time.
I could go later in the year to avoid stressing at the wedding about flying. Also another issue is food I can’t eat much abroad so all my other holidays have been a few days or max of 5 days.
So my options are fly - 3 hours
Train from Paris 7 hours
Take a London to Basel train and stay over there and the journey is only 4 hours to Milan.
---------- Post added at 17:33 ---------- Previous post was at 17:26 ----------
The past year I’ve put a lot of pressure on travelling lots as I may have a family after getting married so worried I won’t be as flexiable to do this ..but the pressure brings anxiety.
Hi Phil,
I think it’s great that you’re traveling when it causes you so much anxiety. I assume it’s your honeymoon? Is your soon-to-be- wife happy to follow your lead or does she have a preference.
Could this be a target for you? Book a flight and work really really hard on conquering those parts of your anxiety that could potentially ruin the greatest holiday of your lives?
I
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
So getting the train may not be a good option?
How strong is your bladder?:) I suppose it depends on how much time you have but train journeys can let you see more of the various countries you travel through and would avoid the anticipatory anxiety of air travel when you have all the wedding preparation to think of too? What does your partner think?
How strong is your bladder?:) I suppose it depends on how much time you have but train journeys can let you see more of the various countries you travel through and would avoid the anticipatory anxiety of air travel when you have all the wedding preparation to think of too? What does your partner think?
That’s true. Rome and New York are places I really want to see but obviously I can give it a year or two to try and get my anxiety lower for New York.
My partner is ok with either she is laid back and will let me choose. She probably prefers plane but will do train too. I usually get train in Europe however my anxiety has been stuck on a train for say longer than 4 hours and also the worry I have to use the toilet on train or airplane which is one of my worries with long distance journeys. It would shake about also I spend ages on toilet :ohmy:
Obviously train seems more expensive too. But yes it would avoid the air travel anxiety which is great if I was say going 2 hours to Paris by train however the long journey to Italy possible changing trains is a bit more hectic..I’ve done train journeys round Uk and only in last year decided to explore Europe by train and most of my trips have been 2 hours between countries..perhaps the more I explore the next step is the long flights to the US or long train journey?
MyNameIsTerry
08-06-18, 02:09
Is there no way to break the journey up further, if you feel you have no choice? For instance, is there an in-between after Paris? Paris would be good for the honeymoon so a day there seems a winner but is there anywhere after that before you get to Italy/Spain?
Is there no way to break the journey up further, if you feel you have no choice? For instance, is there an in-between after Paris? Paris would be good for the honeymoon so a day there seems a winner but is there anywhere after that before you get to Italy/Spain?
Switzerland is possible but I was hoping to visit this place get to know it rather than go first time and travel to Italy. Staying in Lyon France works too as it’s about 5 hours however bad news is I have to take a metro across the city..
I think flying seems likely as I did fly to Germany and Spain. The anxiety isn’t great before it so I wish I could get some help from the theripst for this.
I hate being shut in so i fear long train journeys or flying to the US also I fear using toilets when travelling too.
I go to Paris quite often so was hoping to push myself to reach Italy.
MyNameIsTerry
09-06-18, 02:01
Switzerland sounds like nice. I guess you could always use it as a taster?
What are your concerns about using the Metro?
Do you feel that you could push yourself for the sake of your wife? Sometimes it's harder to push ourselves for us and easier for others. I find that quite a lot with myself.
Switzerland sounds like nice. I guess you could always use it as a taster?
What are your concerns about using the Metro?
Do you feel that you could push yourself for the sake of your wife? Sometimes it's harder to push ourselves for us and easier for others. I find that quite a lot with myself.
I’ve did well and went on two flights past year or two after a break of around 4 years not flying I use to just holiday down south or London.
I’ve found getting train fine to places like Holland however Italy is further away. I could tell myself it’s a once in a lifetime but there’s alwyas an urge to go back..sometimes I will say I will fly this once and get train next time :hugs:
Metro is ok but just seems to be more complicated. In the next few years I have to think how I can reach New York and Rome.
Short term it’s Rome so I have two options fly or train. Do I suffer the months of flight anxiety and be there in 3 hours or do try the train stop overnight and have a long journey to Milan. Right now I really can’t decice to be honest it’s about comfort zones I feel my next flight should be a short one e.g over to Ireland or something.
I’m glad the train is an option because I can go abroad every year it’s just a question of where.
I have a little bit of ocd with this my head says
If I don’t go on holiday in the winter I will go crazy if I take long trains for my honeymoon in the summer warm weather lots of travelling.
My anxiety controls everything right now. If something doesn’t feel “right” I won’t do it? Anybody relate to this? :ohmy:
My anxiety controls everything right now. If something doesn’t feel “right” I won’t do it? Anybody relate to this? :ohmy:
Totally. The last few years I've done a fair bit of travel to the same place, 14 times in total and although it caused me anxiety each and every time nothing bad happened, the plane journey was maybe 3 hours, so longer than it takes you to get to Paris, but to me if you find the motivation, the willingness and a few distractions it can really help. I travelled alone and what it'd do is take a book and put headphones on with a certain album, rather than watching the clock I knew by the time I heard the playlist once right through there was only 20 mins or so left, which is the best bit, when you get to look forward to what you're about to do and peek out the plane window to see your destination. You have your beautiful wife to help you too, someone to sit with, play a game or chat to, you could even maybe look at one of those little tourism guides of all the sites you will see and all the great memories and with them a bond that lasts a lifetime :)
Well it’s almost 2019 so I Will have to make a choice soon
My fears are long train journeys and flying.
I plan do go to Italy via train however I fear I will go mad if I get a long train journey. I don’t want to limit myself to the usual holidays I go on.
I don’t know why I worry as I regular do Edinburgh to London and even Germany so I Duno why I worry
Have you considered flying one way? So getting the train there or back?
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Have you considered flying one way? So getting the train there or back?
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
If i can fly one way I’d defo fly back it’s more of an occasion thing if I feel like flying I will but if I don’t I won’t.
I don’t want to fly until after my wedding and I Duno where I would fly to maybe a short flight to ireland.
I go on this holiday next week
Bit worried when I calculated I go over 1,000 miles by rail seems scary. I tried to break the journey up into shorter bits but I still worry I will go mad or have anxiety about the long trains?
I did 6 hours then 2 hours there 2 hours back but 4 hours in one go will be a nexperience but I feel I have to tackle my fears so I can take the train on more trips or fly to New York in future :ohmy:
Anybody reassure me about taking long trains and my anxiety?
Midnight-mouse
14-02-19, 22:34
Anybody reassure me about taking long trains and my anxiety?
Take a good book or listen to a podcast or audio book. Boredom will be more of an issue than anxiety once you get going and get over the initial issues if there are any at all, the build up is often far worse than the actual event.
Positive vibes,
Mouse
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
I went on the holiday and managed it however I still feel stressed just thinking about the long trains like tonight I fell asleep and it was on my mind and I still feared going mad?
Perhaps I am worried about the next train trip? My anxiety right now seems to dodge between all my worries from health anxiety to my contamination to my travelling worries?
I did this holiday in February I went to Italy via train but found the travelling quite tiring I would like to go back again and visit Rome but I worry I will have to do the long journey again as I don’t like flying
Ok.. So? Don't go :shrug:
Positive thoughts
nomorepanic
04-05-19, 21:44
I agree with FMP - just don't go then.
MyNameIsTerry
05-05-19, 02:32
Do you want to go? If you do wanting can be a powerful motivator.
Pacing yourself is important too and overdoing things might make you struggle but pushing out your boundaries is an important part of anxiety recovery. Choosing to avoid because fo fear is only leaving irrational fears in place.
Do you want to go? If you do wanting can be a powerful motivator.
Pacing yourself is important too and overdoing things might make you struggle but pushing out your boundaries is an important part of anxiety recovery. Choosing to avoid because fo fear is only leaving irrational fears in place.
I want to go to Rome and New York but they are too far away
Probably doesn’t sound logical because I have travelled all round most major counties in Europe including Italy
I forced myself to Italy I mean it was great but it was 1,000 rail miles from Scotland. I know it’s easier to fly but often I avoid flying for a bit so I believe it’s better to still go on holiday abroad in the past I would holiday in England
What can i do about this? It seems like a mental block with flying I can’t get my head round doing it. Now that I have travelled I would like a world tour but not sure I could cope with it?
Now that I have travelled I would like a world tour but not sure I could cope with it?
A tad ambitious given that you are anxious about Rome or New York.
I want to go to Rome and New York but they are too far away
I would lend you the Complaints Tardis but it's due MOT I'm afraid. You'd be in NY before you'd even packed :wacko:
Complaints have a tardis ? I never knew !
A time travelling facility would be great for those with an anxiety disorder..Just skip a few days and pick up the pieces after the event? Psychologists would go out of business!
What can i do about this? It seems like a mental block with flying I can’t get my head round doing it. Now that I have travelled I would like a world tour but not sure I could cope with it?
If you can afford it, book it.
By avoiding it you’re just feeding your anxiety.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
If you can afford it, book it.
By avoiding it you’re just feeding your anxiety.
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
The money I paid to go to Italy by train would have covered New York easily however I have a fear of long haul flights.
The money I paid to go to Italy by train would have covered New York easily however I have a fear of long haul flights.
But if you really want to go NY then you have to bite the bullet and face your fear. It will be uncomfortable and perhaps frightening but there's no other way. Talking about it over and over again won't change the reality.
What can i do about this? It seems like a mental block with flying I can’t get my head round doing it. Now that I have travelled I would like a world tour but not sure I could cope with it?
Either go or not. No one here can help you nor persuade your decision :shrug:
Positive thoughts
MyNameIsTerry
06-05-19, 03:10
I want to go to Rome and New York but they are too far away
Probably doesn’t sound logical because I have travelled all round most major counties in Europe including Italy
I forced myself to Italy I mean it was great but it was 1,000 rail miles from Scotland. I know it’s easier to fly but often I avoid flying for a bit so I believe it’s better to still go on holiday abroad in the past I would holiday in England
So, you have some choices:
1) Let your anxiety stop you i.e. avoidance. This won't help you in the long run for very obvious reasons.
2) Go for it and take it, good or bad.
3) Take a structured approach to building up to your dreams.
4) Procrastinate. This would your anxiety's preference :winks:
If you consider 3 you can try things to get you closer to your goals. Get a map out and see where you can get too and how. Where is there within that radius that would interest you? Over time you gain confidence and build it up, expand the radius.
Since you have done a fair bit of travelling you are already doing this with rail. So, you can expand that with rail. You can also follow this approach again but with planes. You don't need to fly straight to Rome to build up your confidence when you could get cheap flights across the UK. Then keep going...
The money I paid to go to Italy by train would have covered New York easily however I have a fear of long haul flights.
But you also have a fear of your bin, and you use it every day.
Since you like the easiest option, could you get prescribed some drugs to help you relax while flying?
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
But you also have a fear of your bin, and you use it every day.
Since you like the easiest option, could you get prescribed some drugs to help you relax while flying?
Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
Yes I have heard of people taking tablets to fly could be an option or maybe some rescue remedy
So, you have some choices:
1) Let your anxiety stop you i.e. avoidance. This won't help you in the long run for very obvious reasons.
2) Go for it and take it, good or bad.
3) Take a structured approach to building up to your dreams.
4) Procrastinate. This would your anxiety's preference :winks:
If you consider 3 you can try things to get you closer to your goals. Get a map out and see where you can get too and how. Where is there within that radius that would interest you? Over time you gain confidence and build it up, expand the radius.
Since you have done a fair bit of travelling you are already doing this with rail. So, you can expand that with rail. You can also follow this approach again but with planes. You don't need to fly straight to Rome to build up your confidence when you could get cheap flights across the UK. Then keep going...
Yes I have spoken a lot about avoidance over the years and how it never helps In the end I usually have to face my fear. I looked into the boat but it’s a week to New York I believe that might be worse. I probably have a bigger fear of boats than planes.
I realise the easiest way for me to get to Rome is either book a cheap flight or some how do that journey I went on before and add Rome in and do it by rail. And yes short flights I could fly to Dublin 20 times before I’d fancy long haul to New York because the time in the air is only like 30 mins most of the time is take off and landing.
I use to get worked up and only do UK holidays with my anxiety then I decided to go over the tunnel to Europe and that expanded things and I done Italy which is usually only done by flying.
My goal was New York next year but I looked into the Scottish flights they all involve overnight travel and I can’t sleep on a plane so the best I found was 10am I think it around 12pm and landing back in London at 10pm. New York actually takes up a full day travel with the time zone issue.
So yes I am maybe hoping to do more CBT this year and try and get help for flying so I can go to New York it would be a shame for the anxiety to win as generally I usually don’t let it now. There is so much to think about with New York the food, time zone, long haul, jet lag ect. I quite fancy Japan aswell but again my anxiety is long haul and the food. Perhaps one day I can come back here and say I did go to New York? I will be honest and say if Concorde was still around I would be very happy to fly 3/4 hours to New York despite my fear of flying because it would be much quicker. I flew to Barcelona so these short haul flights are easier for me.
You wouldn’t have liked the Concorde,way too cramped
Just stay home and pitch a tent in your back yard,that’ll fix your problem and throw a shrimp on the barbie:yesyes:
Ah Lola-lee,
How little you understand our British weather lol By the time we have dragged the barbie into place, scraped the rust off and managed to get it started, the 'just about alright' weather has changed to miserable. :roflmao:
....coming up to 'official summer' means nothing here. Summer is a word.
Powered by vBulletin® Version 4.2.5 Copyright © 2024 vBulletin Solutions Inc. All rights reserved.