Health Anxiety & Fear of Meds?

[raya4]

So I'm fairly new to anxiety, about two months in and counting, and right now it's running my life. I understand that there are root causes probably coming from outside my body and I can see the rational connections--heart stuff petrifies me (and I am having a lot of rapid/elevated heartbeat, palps, etc.) because my mother has heart problems. If I get a headache, I am reminded that my dad died of a brain tumor, etc.

However every time a psychiatrist has tried to get me on a med, I chicken out after less than week. Because of my health anxiety, I will fixate on the side effects and I can't get myself over that hurdle. Secretly or not so secretly I think it's because I'm also terrified of medication so I go back and forth with wondering if my symptoms are really something to be concerned about versus it just all being in my head. I also don't understand how anyone manages to work and everything else while going through all the start-up fatigue and etc. I also feel I would need to take a leave of absence from work in order to make it happen and then of course I start getting anxiety about losing my job or not being able to pay my bills.

Question is did anyone else have this hurdle who is now on meds? And if so how to get past? I am on klonopin, but doesn't really cut it all away and also don't want to be on benzos longterm for daily use. Plus might have some depression/slight OCD built in and of course that does nothing for that.

I also think it doesn't help that while I know I shouldn't google, I wind up on forums (ha ha) reading everyones experiences with different meds so always wind up fearing the worst. I understand that most people go online when they struggle and not with the good stories, but it scares me before I even start and then its already in my head.

[Jenwales]

I've never been given anything for my anxiety. I'd recommend trying something alongside your medication, yoga is very helpful as it's a light exercise and it helps calm the mind. Or if you are too tired for that mindfulness meditation when practiced overtime helps ease the mind and the anxieties. Maybe with that extra calm you can take your medication or you won't even need it

[raya4]

Thanks! I have started doing restorative yoga and I'm trying to learn meditation and doing beginner meditations through my headspace app. It certainly helps in the moment, but I'm not yet in a place where any of these things help when I'm in a moment of panic. I am trying to make my yoga routine more regular and I'd also like to get regular cardio/exercise.

The biggest original reason for the klonopin because my mind tends to be too anxious to sleep so the less I sleep of course the more anxious I am. It's become a vicious circle.

I'd like to do it without meds and get off the klon ASAP, but I'm not yet entirely in a place to make that happen. Trying my best. One day at a time.

[Checkdis]

CBD oil saved me. It allowed me to relax and get off Ativan.

[MyNameIsTerry]

Starting meds can be a very hard experience for some. I've only tried 2 so far and both start ups were hard going. I was already off work by then but there was no way I would have been able to stay in work feeling like that.

There is the benzo strategy of deadening the side effects to give you enough help to get started on a med. Or another strategy is to start low and build up. This does mean it takes more time to feel the benefits and each increase can bring side effects but it means your body gets used to it more slowly as opposed to it hitting you full on from the start.

What I found with my second med, when I relapsed years later, was that it was even harder (this med has never suited me) but because I was prepared for a very hard experience I kept fighting through taking it day by day until it finally lost the intensity. Whereas when I tried my first one, and I was new to anxiety after a breakdown and my GP didn't properly prepare me for what I could go through starting meds, I fell to pieces very quickly. This was party because I didn't understand what was happening to me and I had also never felt depression before.

There are also meds with less hard side effect profiles.

There are plenty of people on here just like you. Have a look at the Meds board for your med. Many have started on lower doses to get through this. Some have even started at very small doses and built up.

You will need to tough some of it out and accept what is it. If something shows up at the time you start meds, are near to it, put it down to the meds and you can also talk to your doctor about it. But the HA will try to find a way to confirm it's about what you fear and this is something you can will need to just brave through.

[Fishmanpa]

CBD oil saved me. It allowed me to relax and get off Ativan.

I was just talking to a work friend about this. She was on a couple of anxiety meds plus meds for pre-diabetes. She tried CBD oil and she's practically off all her meds. She stopped Zoloft and a couple other meds and has been using the oil. Her last two check ups were spot on! I personally have a topical version my acupuncturist gave me for neck spasms. Works great!

I hope the medical community does more research into this. Evidence does point to positive medicinal use, same as cannabis. (Just my opinion).

Positive thoughts