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DM
12-08-07, 21:21
Hey guys, I'm new to this site, but infortunatley I've been equainted with Panic and Anxiety for longer than I'd like.

I'm hoping with your help I can nip this in the bud, and help some of you on the way....I mean, let's be honest, talking helps!!

You've probably heard and felt all this before, so appologies for the bore-fest, but again, talking can make a difference...ya know..?

I'm 22. I have a great life. My family and Girlfriend are everything to me. I love my job. I have good friends, I enjoy the world around me and I'm always looking for the next rush!

So why one day would the sky and it's heavy clouds fall down on me like a million arrows dipped in pure fear and introduce me to the most hanus bodily functions and mental hysteria I have only ever seen in Freddie Crooger Films...?

I can think of only one thing....maybe more that attributed to it, but certainly one incident that in my mind pulled the trigger of a gun filled with what we have all been accustomed to for way too long now - PANIC.

My mother was my best friend.

I'm alot like her.

She would do anything for her family...or so I thought.

She has always had problems with her weight and has been self-obsessed with appearance since her parents put her on a diet at a very early age. She is...was beautiful, a hippy looking bird, with an attitude of 'ahh f**k it!!', she really used to be cool man! Shame.

When I was 15 I noticed that things weren't right with her. Her weight hit rock bottom and she was always not really with it...to cut a long story short she - out of nowhere - became an alcoholic.

years and years of begging her to stop the drink, stop the physical and mental abuse, just stop, stop, "STOP!!!!!!"

No words made any difference. She turned her back on me. My Mum, my mate, my hero turned her back on me.

I hit a low. I was still in school about to start college. My brother and sister looked to their older brother (me) for help, I looked to my Dad...there was nothing we could do.

We plodded along getting every help possible and at the age of 18 I started to go out. I drank, and I got heavy into drugs. It got worse when the one person who really made an attempt to help us all - My Auntie Carole - died tragically in front of us (brain tumour) I'll never forget that day.

3 years later and Mum was out in her own flat living off the council. She didnt eat so all her money went on booze.

At this point I was 21. A little over-weight. I drank, but didnt do many narcotics, I grew out of it, got bored. I did however turn to phet to try and lose weight. After a week of having it and eating nothing, I was laying bed watching Sharpe and I experienced my first attack. It tore me to pieces. It affected my work and I'm lucky to work with some very reasonable people or I would be out on my arse!!

I have a phobia of dying through drowning, strangulation, cardio vascular failure. I don't know how I've done it but I've only ever hyper-ventalated 3 times. But had many attacks. The feeling, the intense pressure in your head telling you "This is it Danny Boy, your family are gonna be crushed by your death, what will they do?"...

Of course this will never happen, and I've found knowledge to be the best weapon against these traumatic times. I have never and will never use medication to help sustain a normal mind-frame - I'm big enough and smart enough to conquor this without it.

To be quite frank, these past 3 months have been really good. I've gone days without the sudden urge to sit up, to drink water, to gently touch parts of my head that feel hot and pressured, to rub my right shoulder and neck, to check my pulse, to wonder why my normally average sized penis has shrunk to a degree that even I would laugh at, to get on the NHS website and diagnose myself wih a brain tumour, cancer or heart conditions...basically, I was feeling good.

I'm writing this now (and please accept my humblest appologies for the long first post) as I'm not feeling too good. My alcohol consumption has gone through the roof. I buy and enjoy a bottle of Shiraz every night, sometimes two!

I've been a kaner and can/have/do party with the best of em. Now though I'm experiencing something different. My heart sometimes feels bruised inside and on the outside at the touch it feels bruised too. Not all the time though, maybe for a few mins at most. I've kinda accepted that this is just anxiety as my friend has experienced it also.

What is worrying me now is the Depersonalization that has suddenly crepped up on me. I say worry cause my friend killed himself for the same reason 6 months ago. He was just a lad i sorta knew through school, so nothing major, but the way he died and the causes behind it do frighten me.

I want to know if you people feel pain in your heart and chest like I described and can you describe how you feel when experiencing Depersonalization...?

...And finally, do you think that my Mother and her actions have been the trigger?

Knowledge is the Bomb, don't forget that. If we have knowledge we then understand, with understanding comes appreciation, with appreciation comes acceptance and with acceptance comes the ability to defeat the demon.

This is a great site.

Hope you all had an awesome weekend.

DM

kazzie
12-08-07, 21:36
Hi DM and a warm welcome to you:D

I dont know the answers Im afraid but I believe the past can cause these awful feelings in the here and now!!!

Im sure someone will be along soon who can answer you more fully than me!!!

Glad you have found us and hopefully you will stick around, make new friends and have some fun too!!!

Welcome again:yesyes:

Best Wishes

Kaz x

groovygranny
12-08-07, 21:38
Hello DM :welcome:to you!

You've had an awful lot going on haven't you? I'm sure you'll be able to find, and give, help and support here!

I would like to say one thing though - you haven't mentioned about seeing your GP. I think that may be a wise next move, if only to clarify things and give you options.

Pleased to meet you!

:)

DM
12-08-07, 21:48
Hello DM :welcome:to you!

You've had an awful lot going on haven't you? I'm sure you'll be able to find, and give, help and support here!

I would like to say one thing though - you haven't mentioned about seeing your GP. I think that may be a wise next move, if only to clarify things and give you options.

Pleased to meet you!

:)

Orate Kidda, it's a pleasure meeting you too!

I've been to see my GP he reffered me to a specialist but I've still had no word back....he said there was a waiting list, but not 8 months, surely!!!

People who have never suffered with all this bollócks can't ever 100% relate and give you that extra bit of comfort.

My GP is a good bloke, but he's not educated enough to understand.

It's sorta like with my girlfriend. She's great, but again says the same old crap we've heard hundreds of times "It's all in your head, just be more positive, stop thinking about it!!" hhahahaha it's funny talking about it, cause it's the same phrases coming form the same people - non-sufferers!!!

NVM, I'd never wish it on em.

Nibbles
12-08-07, 22:16
Hi DM and :welcome:

You'll get loads of advice and support here while making new friends along the way.

Take care,

Mike

honeybee3939
12-08-07, 22:27
Hi DM

Welcome to NMP, its lovely to see you here:) , im sure you will get some great advice, support and make some new friends also:yesyes:

Love
:hugs:
Andrea
xxxx

manmoor
13-08-07, 11:27
Hi DM,

A big warm welcome to you. xx

Lindalou64
13-08-07, 14:41
Hi Dm,
I Must Say Your Post Has Touched Me...for Your Question Im Not Sure If Your Moms Actions Did This Too You Drugs Ect...im Sure They Contibuted To Them...i Get A Heavy Chest At Times Of Anxiety ,have You Been To Your Gp For A Full Exam.....just To Rule Things Out....i Really Do Wish Ya The Best And Im Sure You Will Find Lots Of Support And Info Here And Welcome To The Site........linda X

nomorepanic
13-08-07, 19:14
Hi DM

:welcome: aboard and lovely to see you here.

Hope we can be of some help.

kilometres
14-08-07, 01:17
Hi mate, and thanks for sharing your story, iv'e had a hard road to hoe over the last 2 years, and my past is just catching up with me, so in some ways i can relate to your pain. I am confronting my pain and my past day by day, and for that im fortunate, but i understand that, for you and many other good people it can time and patience. You need to talk to a counsillor, to get your problems out in the open. I hate the thought of talking to a stranger 1on1 but im now taking sessions, and i believe it works. I cant tell you whats best, (coz im only just beggining to work out whats best for me!) but i would advise that you tackle your drinking habbits. I believe we all have demons in our lives, so you arnt alone. Hope you feel better:shades:

Greeneyed
14-08-07, 08:39
Hi DM,

It sounds like you have had an enormous amount to cope with in life and it is unsuprising that it is starting to take it's toll. Don't be too hard on yourself for turning to alcohol for release, it is a fairly normal response. At your age I drank a similar amount and took drugs. I now manage to stick with around 15 -20 units per week at the most (about two bottles of wine) and I have gradually learned my limits.

I cannot express enough how drinking too much is the biggest single factor in my anxiety and panic attacks. I drank every night for years (I grew up in a family where my parents did that and I thought it was normal) I convinced myself I needed it and couldn't go a night without it. That was complete crap and as soon as I finally took the bull by the horns (started off with two nights per week not drinking) i found it was actually a lot easier than I thought to cut down.

My anxiety immediately improves the second I reduce my drinking and if I ever have more than half a bottle of wine these days you can be sure I will be very anxious and may experience a panic attack the next day so it just isn't worth it. I can still have a couple of glasses to be sociable and relax me which I do three or four nights per week and that suits me fine.

I am almost certain that if you got your drinking down to sensible limits you would feel a hell of a lot better. If you cannot do this on your own you must go and see your GP and ask for help (You should go anyway to explain things have worsened) Or try downyourdrink a self help internet programme.

You sound just the same as me in that you refuse to take medication for your illness (I steadfastly won't either) but you are essentially self medicating with your one or two bottles of wine a night. - this medicine is a very short term fix and actually is proven to make your symptoms worse -

The fact that you don't want to take medication shows that you are very motivated to deal with your anxiety which is great, but don't feel you have to totally go it alone. Do go back to your GP, explain your symptoms and that you are drinking to be able to cope with it and that you need help sooner. I have found with the NHS that it is the one who shouts the loudest who is seen first.

In the meantime you could try some self help books based around cognitive behavioural therapy. I read two books about overcoming panic whilst waiting for my therapy and they suggested loads of techniques which helped enormously.

With some motivation and a little effort on your part you can get better I promise and you can and will cut down the drinking when you find other ways to cope.

I know the weather isn't great at the moment but try to get outside as much as you can - in the early dyas I found that helped enourmously. Instead of opeing the wine I would go for a big walk and take in the scenery and fresh air. Also try a hot bath with some lavender oil when you get in on a night instead of opening a bottle. hot baths are proven to help with panic attacks and they will generally relax you.

You only have one life, try to make it a happy one - take back control and work at this thing - you will get there.

Good luck Greeneyed xxx

Pink Princess
14-08-07, 13:46
http://www.therusticlife.com/Bear-welcome-sign.jpg

welcome xxx

love minnie xxxxxxxxxxx

DM
14-08-07, 14:11
awww guys, you're pretty cool, ya know....

stay frosty!