Morning - hoping for some advice

[Abs76]

Morning,

I’ve had anxiety my whole life mainly around social situations which I’ve always got on with. I had some help 16 years ago when a spell of bad personal events left me in a complete state with daily anxiety attacks and OCD. Things got better with medication but in the last three years I have developed an anxiety around being away from home. One night away with my husband from our three teenage boys left me with a three hour anxiety attack. This was the catalyst and since then every holiday I have cut short due to anxiety symptoms; evening shakes, no appetite and just wanting to go home. Each time one of my sons hasn’t come away with us.

Last year we all went to Portugal and the night before I was in a state, I called No Panic’s helpline and spoke to a lovely lady, between her, my Dad and my husband they all convinced me to go and I had the best time, even booking a return holiday while we were still there. In May I cancelled a week’s holiday to Cornwall as lots of things went wrong beforehand and none of our sons wanted to come away. We are now a week away from our nine day holiday to Portugal (without our eldest) and I have been in an anxiety state for over a week; upset stomach, constant negative thoughts. I have been to my GP and I’m going to start CBT next week which I’ve never had before. However my husband wants to cancel the holiday. I felt relief when he said that but I feel like the worst parent ever for doing this to them but I just can’t face going. Does anyone have any experience of this type of anxiety?

Thank you

[venusbluejeans]

Hiya Abs76 and welcome to NMP :welcome:

Why not take a look at our articles on our home page, they contain a wealth of information and are a great starting place for your time on the forum.

I hope you find the as site helpful and informative as I have and that you get the help and support you need here and hope that you meet a few friends along the way :yesyes:

[MRS STRESS ED]

l totally understand you when I go away l am constantly worrying is everything ok at home ,l have panic attacks awful anxiety,

l put this down when l was young on holiday my grandad died after that l felt this overwhelming anxiety being away,

The only advice l can give you is push through it don't let it take over your life its horrible but it can't hurt you ,

l still go on holiday l wont let it take everything its taken enough of my life maybe go see your doctor might be able to help but don't give up xx :hugs:

[Abs76]

Thank you for your reply, it’s so nice to know you aren’t alone. I have pushed on through so many holidays but each one ends the same. We had to sail back three days early from France two years ago as my husband couldn’t see me get so poorly. It’s him who wants to cancel although I felt all my anxiety melt away when he suggested it. My GP gave me Diazepam to get there but only enough to fly with. He suggested CBT which starts a day before we are due to fly. I don’t want to let my family down but equally I have ruined so many holidays with my anxiety.

[MRS STRESS ED]

Thank you for your reply, it’s so nice to know you aren’t alone. I have pushed on through so many holidays but each one ends the same. We had to sail back three days early from France two years ago as my husband couldn’t see me get so poorly. It’s him who wants to cancel although I felt all my anxiety melt away when he suggested it. My GP gave me Diazepam to get there but only enough to fly with. He suggested CBT which starts a day before we are due to fly. I don’t want to let my family down but equally I have ruined so many holidays with my anxiety.

oh bless you it saddens me to hear you say you ruined your families holidays, you haven't you have got a dabilitating illness.

You should be proud of yourself for going its a big deal ,l had cbt and also l went to panic group it really helped .

And a bit of diazepam can help get you through and also remember you didn't suggest cancelling so be proud of yourself they say small steps l say yours are big :hugs:

[Abs76]

Thank you for your kind words, I was this worked up before France and it didn’t end well so maybe I ought to just accept it, stay home and get out with the family using our holiday spending money to try and compensate a little. My anxiety is life-long and hereditary (generations of anxiety suffers before me), it just peaks and troughs at times. It can be so tiring at times.

[MRS STRESS ED]

l totally get you but don't give in to your anxiety fight it you can do it :yesyes:
its along hard road but walk that road get some help keep going best of luck to you :bighug1:

[Abs76]

Thank you 😊

[Rad1]

Hi Abs,
How terrible for you. I can recall a holiday that I went on where I got so overwhelmed with anxiety that I did all I could to get home half way through. But there were no flights. That was many years ago, my anxiety manifests itself in other ways now. And since then I have managed to enjoy great holidays. Which meds have you tried? SSRIs can really help manage such feelings. Perhaps an increased dose if you are already on them.

I understand the hereditary bit, it’s in my family too and coupled with some difficult experiences through my life. Have you ever tried meditation and yoga? I’ve just done a course in meditation and before that discovered deep breathing. During recent intense anxiety it helped me to return to a manageable state. Breathing is so important.

Home is our safety and when we feel out of our familiar situations it can trigger the urge to get back. Is there no way you can opt fir a short break? Maybe a city trip. You will keep occupied and distracted from your worry and negative thoughts. And a break in routine and some fun will be great fir all the family.
Take care,
Rad1