Insomniac
13-08-07, 21:19
I have just come back from a short break camping in Wales.
While I was there with hubby, he really wanted to climb The Skirrid, a mountain which you can walk up, though its steep in places.
Well, getting out of the car going to an unknown place was the first step.
Then walking along a lane with hubby & daughter while he figured out where we were going! :ohmy:
Its difficult because I am outside my circle of safety. I am learning to take my circle with me (like an aura or something,), but its difficult sometimes when you don't know exactly where you're going, how long it will take, how difficult the climb will be, when you might need the loo,:blush: etc etc. All those what-ifs really try to badger me inside my head.
Well, we climbed a stile and walked up a steep field, my anxiety reduced at first then increased when I started to feel hot. I told myself I felt hot because of the exercise and weather, and that anxiety had nothing to do with it. Because you know what its like, you start looking for the symptoms and they start to appear....
We went through a field of cows, under an electric fence and through a field of sheep too. Hubby is well aware of my responses and I don't need to say too much (i.e. not worry our daughter) and he understands how I am doing.
We took our time and the last bit was very difficult, I stopped a few times to make sure I was catching my breath and letting my safe zone keep up. I got dizzy a few times, and was very hot, though it was a hot day too - so I talked myself out of that one telling my head it was weather NOT anxiety!
We made it to the top. 1600 feet and a fabulous view!! What a feeling. :yesyes:
I also ate a meal out one evening, and managed the travelling and staying in a camp site in the middle of no-where. Its another point to me. One up over the anxiety.
I just wanted to share my holiday with you all. I was really anxious before going because its the first time in our caravan, which was free second-hand, and travelling is tough for me anyway, being in the middle of no-where is hard too. But I managed it all! That's not to say the panic wasn't there, it tried to tap me on the shoulder quite a few times... But I told it I wasn't listening (with help from rescue remedy, camomile tea, and a wonderfully supportive hubby:hugs: ).
I never expected this to go away completely. I just wanted to live my life. And I can. The re-learning takes a long time, and some things will always be difficult, but THERE IS HOPE!.
:flowers: :flowers: :flowers:
While I was there with hubby, he really wanted to climb The Skirrid, a mountain which you can walk up, though its steep in places.
Well, getting out of the car going to an unknown place was the first step.
Then walking along a lane with hubby & daughter while he figured out where we were going! :ohmy:
Its difficult because I am outside my circle of safety. I am learning to take my circle with me (like an aura or something,), but its difficult sometimes when you don't know exactly where you're going, how long it will take, how difficult the climb will be, when you might need the loo,:blush: etc etc. All those what-ifs really try to badger me inside my head.
Well, we climbed a stile and walked up a steep field, my anxiety reduced at first then increased when I started to feel hot. I told myself I felt hot because of the exercise and weather, and that anxiety had nothing to do with it. Because you know what its like, you start looking for the symptoms and they start to appear....
We went through a field of cows, under an electric fence and through a field of sheep too. Hubby is well aware of my responses and I don't need to say too much (i.e. not worry our daughter) and he understands how I am doing.
We took our time and the last bit was very difficult, I stopped a few times to make sure I was catching my breath and letting my safe zone keep up. I got dizzy a few times, and was very hot, though it was a hot day too - so I talked myself out of that one telling my head it was weather NOT anxiety!
We made it to the top. 1600 feet and a fabulous view!! What a feeling. :yesyes:
I also ate a meal out one evening, and managed the travelling and staying in a camp site in the middle of no-where. Its another point to me. One up over the anxiety.
I just wanted to share my holiday with you all. I was really anxious before going because its the first time in our caravan, which was free second-hand, and travelling is tough for me anyway, being in the middle of no-where is hard too. But I managed it all! That's not to say the panic wasn't there, it tried to tap me on the shoulder quite a few times... But I told it I wasn't listening (with help from rescue remedy, camomile tea, and a wonderfully supportive hubby:hugs: ).
I never expected this to go away completely. I just wanted to live my life. And I can. The re-learning takes a long time, and some things will always be difficult, but THERE IS HOPE!.
:flowers: :flowers: :flowers: