LuluBear
14-08-18, 18:13
I posted a twofold post yesterday. The first part talked about fear of IBD based on current symptoms. The second part talked about how to handle the related HA. My post was understandably moved to the IBS/IBD/Stomach Forum, but my questions and concerns are more about general HA and how to deal with it. Yes, today it's IBD, but even within that fear, I'm still toying with the idea that it could be colon or ovarian cancer.My point is, it's always something. If my stomach somehow miraculously gets better, I'll just focus my attention on a growing mole, an autoimmune disease, brain cancer, MS, you name it.
So my question is less about my specific current fixation and more about how to work past this. I'm at a really, really bad place right now. Like non-functional. On a scale of 1-10, my panic is an 11. Constant. And it's so uncomfortable. The only relief I get is from sleep, but the second I wake up the intense panic is there to greet me. I feel like a junkie detoxing. I feel like I'm crawling out of my skin and have nowhere to turn. My friends are thoughtful, but they can't relate. Same with my husband. I feel completely alone and isolated and helpless. And I'm losing the friends I have because I can't commit to plans, and everyone thinks I should just move past it, not realizing that I've been trying to do just that for the better part of 20 years.
The real kick in the pants is that I'm on meds and different behavioral and talk therapies. I've tried so many combos over the years and I've hit a plateau. And I'm scared that this is is for me, and feeling incredibly helpless.I just don't see a way out of this. Maybe for me this is the end of the line and there's just no cure for my anxiety. There are lots of psych illnesses for which there are no cures (e.g. schizophrenia).
Does anyone have any pearls of wisdom for me? This forum has been a lifeline for which I'm very grateful.
So my question is less about my specific current fixation and more about how to work past this. I'm at a really, really bad place right now. Like non-functional. On a scale of 1-10, my panic is an 11. Constant. And it's so uncomfortable. The only relief I get is from sleep, but the second I wake up the intense panic is there to greet me. I feel like a junkie detoxing. I feel like I'm crawling out of my skin and have nowhere to turn. My friends are thoughtful, but they can't relate. Same with my husband. I feel completely alone and isolated and helpless. And I'm losing the friends I have because I can't commit to plans, and everyone thinks I should just move past it, not realizing that I've been trying to do just that for the better part of 20 years.
The real kick in the pants is that I'm on meds and different behavioral and talk therapies. I've tried so many combos over the years and I've hit a plateau. And I'm scared that this is is for me, and feeling incredibly helpless.I just don't see a way out of this. Maybe for me this is the end of the line and there's just no cure for my anxiety. There are lots of psych illnesses for which there are no cures (e.g. schizophrenia).
Does anyone have any pearls of wisdom for me? This forum has been a lifeline for which I'm very grateful.