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CeeBeeby
19-09-18, 21:38
Hello everybody just wanted to say hi.

I'm Chris, I've had a heart condition 15 years, I live in almost complete solitude, I spend most of my time at the beach when I go out because the coast is always a good companion and I'm absolutely terrible at making friends. I have no friends. And the crazy thing is, I'm actually kind of ok with it all.

I've accepted that I'm destined to be one of life's natural losers, without any bad feelings. I can't work because I'm ill, likewise I'm probably ill because I can't work. I lost custody of my daughter due to alcoholism, 3 years later my amazing partner left me, I then lost my house and everybody I knew. I seem to be good at losing and being a loser so I've just learnt to accept it. I used to use self-harm as a coping mechanism along with alcohol, but not so much these days. Another thing I have come to terms with is solitude. Y'know, you do something for so long you'll get used to it?? That's what happened here. I have genuinely considered starting an online losers Club what people like myself who are socially awkward, cut off and cut out of society in general, or who just feel like they just have no place in society.

Anyway that's my story, of course there's a lot more to it than that but I don't want to overlord you all with the details. I'm very frank and open so I hope to speak to you all soon.

venusbluejeans
19-09-18, 21:44
Hiya CeeBeeby and welcome to NMP :welcome:

Why not take a look at our articles on our home page, they contain a wealth of information and are a great starting place for your time on the forum.

I hope you find the as site helpful and informative as I have and that you get the help and support you need here and hope that you meet a few friends along the way :yesyes:

jojo2316
19-09-18, 22:07
You don’t sound like a loser to me. Well done in stopping the self harm - that’s not easy to do! Keep going - you can do it !

panics
03-10-18, 07:28
Hi Chris, I'm Hanna from South Africa. You are not a loser, just scared... I had two heart attacks and I am scared of everything. When I'm scared I tend to make bad decisions too. I am a little better now but still get bad panic attacks.

You will be fine survival is in human nature, at some stage things will start getting better. That's what I keep telling myself.

Good luck and forgiving yourself is the first step.

Hanna:bighug1: