Sick and tired of this 💩

[Limeslime]

I’m sitting in soft play watching my three year old son playing, whilst trying to keep my mind off the symptoms that my health anxiety is grasping onto this week!
I honestly hate feeling this way. I’ve had a lovely few days of looking at wedding venues and bridesmaid dresses, feeling on top of the world!
But then the demon that is HA decides to say “hey! You won’t be alive in 2020 to have your dream wedding because you clearly have cancer. So why bother planning!”

I found a lump in my breast yesterday. But then again, it’s about the 4th lump this year that I’m worried about. They’ve always gone away. I think I probably have fibrocystic breasts...especially given that my period is due in 4 days. My brain knows that. But my “demon” says it’s breast cancer. And he is stronger!

I just want my life back. This is so tiring!

[jojo2316]

yes it’s SO tiring isn’t it? I’ve been where you are many many times (literally - sitting in a soft play place, worrying about breast cancer!!!). I don’t really have advice - it’s not as easy as saying “think about other stuff” (if only!!!) - but know that you are not alone.

[Limeslime]

Thanks Jojo. I made it sore and swollen yesterday by prodding and poking so I’m trying to let it heal. I’ve managed not to touch it since this morning which is quite a victory for me!!!
(And yet torture!)

[max86]

Thanks Jojo. I made it sore and swollen yesterday by prodding and poking so I’m trying to let it heal. I’ve managed not to touch it since this morning which is quite a victory for me!!!
(And yet torture!)

I know the feeling although I'm a male...
I was touching some bump between my ribs and I made it and the ribs hurt just by touching it....
Eventually it was just my xiphoid bone :)

[Miley]

I’ve had a few breast ultrasound because I have fibrocystic breasts and the radiologist said every woman has benign cysts that disappear and reappear in different places at different times of the month. She took 79 pictures because I had so many and all were benign!

[Anxiousamyj]

I know how you feel. I’m tired of it too. I was at the doctor over 20 times between summer 2017 and this past June. Including 3 very expensive er visits only to come up with a total of nothing they could find wrong. I always think “if they had only done this test, I’d feel better”.but I know I wouldn’t feel better for long. I hope we can all find a way to kick this ha and take our lives back. It’s robbed me of so much time with my kids, spent googling and fretting. Also being short tempered. We need to remember not to body check, google, or ask for reassurance. It’s so hard. I wish you the best. I am sure the breast lump is totally fine. I’ve had loads of them too, had an ultrasound or two, but they’re always fine. Hugs to you.