Abundance23
23-09-18, 12:56
Hello, so this may be slightly long and I could really do with some advice and guidance. I’m totally at a loss of what to do and feel so useless.
I’ll try keep as short as possible.
Last year I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years and within a short amount of time I met someone else. It was too soon and I knew it and my ex still believed there was a chance of us getting back together. This guy I met was perfect to begin with but then I noticed narcissistic behaviour (gaslighting me, using my depression against me, telling me I had no friends etc). Because of how low I was I left a really good job as I couldn’t bring myself to do it. On a night out he had told people I had cheated on my ex with him when I hadn’t. He told me he didn’t know why he said it then said it was bevause he didn’t want me to ever get back with my ex. People were shouting st me in the street and I lost friendships during this.
Anyway, in january my friend told me a really big secret. It could ruin families and lives. One night while was with the guy he told me he knew about it and I believe this is because he had read my messages while I was in the bathroom. Anyway. After a couple months I worked up the courage to leave this guy and started counselling. I was/ am so scared that he may tell this secret and I will lose my friend.
I am now seeing someone else but will be calling things off soon. He is a kind person and I have no reason to believe he would hurt me. However, one night when I was drunk I started crying and told him that the guy knew about my friends secret. I am now so scared that he will tell everyone once I break things off with him. I am so scared he will use personal things against me but I know I can’t stay with him because of that reason.
I am so scared and have a massive issue with peoples thoughts of me. I am scared of my reputation being ruined. But I need to focus on myself and can’t live like this any longer.
Do I tell my friend that these two guys know? Should I sit her down and tell her everything, or does that make me look like a really bad friend?
At the moment I am not working due to anxiety and stress because of the thoughts in my head. I feel useless and don’t know what to do about everything. I have been using alcohol to cover up the way I feel and it has made things worse. I keep thinking one day someone is going to say something and I will be left with nobody. I’ve told myself my friends don’t even like me anymore because of stupid things I’ve said about them or to them.
Any advice would be so appreciated. I’m really lost.
I’ll try keep as short as possible.
Last year I broke up with my boyfriend of 3 years and within a short amount of time I met someone else. It was too soon and I knew it and my ex still believed there was a chance of us getting back together. This guy I met was perfect to begin with but then I noticed narcissistic behaviour (gaslighting me, using my depression against me, telling me I had no friends etc). Because of how low I was I left a really good job as I couldn’t bring myself to do it. On a night out he had told people I had cheated on my ex with him when I hadn’t. He told me he didn’t know why he said it then said it was bevause he didn’t want me to ever get back with my ex. People were shouting st me in the street and I lost friendships during this.
Anyway, in january my friend told me a really big secret. It could ruin families and lives. One night while was with the guy he told me he knew about it and I believe this is because he had read my messages while I was in the bathroom. Anyway. After a couple months I worked up the courage to leave this guy and started counselling. I was/ am so scared that he may tell this secret and I will lose my friend.
I am now seeing someone else but will be calling things off soon. He is a kind person and I have no reason to believe he would hurt me. However, one night when I was drunk I started crying and told him that the guy knew about my friends secret. I am now so scared that he will tell everyone once I break things off with him. I am so scared he will use personal things against me but I know I can’t stay with him because of that reason.
I am so scared and have a massive issue with peoples thoughts of me. I am scared of my reputation being ruined. But I need to focus on myself and can’t live like this any longer.
Do I tell my friend that these two guys know? Should I sit her down and tell her everything, or does that make me look like a really bad friend?
At the moment I am not working due to anxiety and stress because of the thoughts in my head. I feel useless and don’t know what to do about everything. I have been using alcohol to cover up the way I feel and it has made things worse. I keep thinking one day someone is going to say something and I will be left with nobody. I’ve told myself my friends don’t even like me anymore because of stupid things I’ve said about them or to them.
Any advice would be so appreciated. I’m really lost.