Seansize
24-09-18, 23:59
hi all my name is Sean i have had anxiety now for around 12yrs im 32 and i never leave my house and if i do my mum comes with me mainly doctors, dentist etc. I was addicted to cafine and i used to drink about 20 cups a day which dident help my anxiety but after i quit drinking coffee around a year ago my anxiety has changed. I now always think about my breathing thinking i have stoped or out of breath and when i panic it gets worse where as befor i would panic over heart rate etc. Even on the internet i avoid social situations like chat, facebook etc i just keep myself to myself and avoid people and i disapear on online friends for 4/5 months at a time and these are people i spoke to online for the last 5 years. I mainly feel guilty more than anything as i spent my 20's sat on my own in my room avoiding the outside world, missing funerals, weddings etc i live on a small estate and even family friends who live 5 mins away aint seen me for over 10 years. My dad is in a mental hospital atm and i rarely visit him because my anxiety so when i try talk myself into doing things and leaving the house to visit my dad/people i cant no matter how hard i try so i just get angry. I think the worse part is being on my own 24/7 watching movies etc because its starting to effect me now and im bord all the time but i cant go out or doing anything diffrent no matter how hard i try so i hope being on here will help me and give me a little boost. :D