View Full Version : Recurrent mole/melanoma fear
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According to my dermatologist, this is a “recurrent Nevus”.
It means I injured it and it grew back looking like a melanoma.
It was last checked in April. Since then it has changed slightly in appearance from the top photo to the bottom one.
I went back to my GP about it in July but she wasn’t concerned. However, this thing haunts me. How can I have HA and get used to living with something that looks like a cancer!
Plus, although it’s still only 4mm and has never changed in size or colour, the shape has changed subtly. I don’t know if this is normal.
I’m freaking out over this tonight! I just don’t know what to do!!! I’m sure it has developed a new dot of pigment since I last looked!
Because it is smaller than a pencil eraser, does this mean that IF it is a melanoma, that it would be a very early stage?
Should I wait to see if it gets bigger before seeing a GP or is the fact that it is getting a fluffy border enough reason to go?
I live in the UK so it’s not easy to see a derm. The GP has to agree that it is needed and refer you. Guidelines state that the mole has to be bigger than 6mm to justify this.
But surely mine doesn’t look right regardless of size? I just don’t know hat to do!
This isn't a medical advice forum, it's a forum about anxiety, and no-one can give you health advice based on photos. No-one is qualified to do so.
The opinion of your dermatologist and GP - highly trained professionals - is worth the comments of 1,000 posters on here.
The question is are you doing anything to address a flare up in anxiety that won't be kept at bay by firm reassurance from professionals?
Thanks for your reply. I’m not asking for medical advice...more clarification as to whether I should seek medical advice. My health anxiety distorts my sense of logic and makes me see things worse than they are.
It’s been a number of months since I seen my derm and GP, and the mole has made subtle changes since then.
I’m simply trying to avoid googling, and also not wanting to waste doctors time if this is just in my head.
I just wanted some “WWYD” kind of opinions.
I just wanted some “WWYD” kind of opinions.
The question really is; 'What will YOU do?'
Your question (WWYD?) is a lose/lose proposition. Most will say you've been cleared by medical professionals so leave it alone and move on (which won't really quell your worry) but if there's any hint of "see your doctor", it will just feed your dragon.
Knowing that your doctor isn't concerned, why are you? The answer is what you need to address.
Positive thoughts
From a previous post of yours "Ok, I’ll afmit this straight off....I’m looking for reassurance! I know it’s a bad cycle"
You have had medical reassurance but having HA means that you come here for more.
This is a cycle only you can break and with your recent good news this is a perfect time to Tame The Dragon.
If you are looking to get better here is a link to the only programme recommended by NMP.
It is not a quick easy fix but it is a permanent way of controlling your anxiety.
Quote:
Originally Posted by robinhall View Post
Hi
My name is Robin Hall. I am co-author of the CBT4Panic programme that is recommended here on nomorepanic
I just wanted to let everyone know that the programme will be available permanently FREE online from now on.
You can access all the CBT workbooks, 56 Videos and emergancy audios and Therapist/Patient Dialogues at the following URL
http://cbt4panic.org/
We desperately need your support to get the website out to as many people as possible. Please check it out and share with others who might benefit.
Thanks and I wish you well on your journey of recovery.
Robin
Thanks for replies all.
I have genuinely made huge progress with my HA in recent months. I even managed to observe a breast lump for three weeks until it disappeared (without running to the doctor or google!)....a few months ago I’d have never managed that!
However I do think HA will always be a part of my life. I’m just trying to learn to manage it. But one of the hardest parts of living with HA is figuring out whether symptoms are genuinely concerning and require a doctors attention, or whether it’s all in my head. Again.
This mole has changed since it was last seen by a dr. That is why I’m asking about it here! Because the change is subtle...so I don’t know if it’s a big deal or not. My HA makes logic difficult.
I’ve book a doctors appointment but I cannot be seen for two weeks, and as everyone with HA knows, waiting makes our anxiety worse. I just wish someone could look at it today!
Huge progress? - sorry I have to question that. Look back on your post history.
I have given you a link to a proven help to recovery, have you looked at it?
Sorry to be so blunt but you have said that you want to get a handle on your HA, then you come back looking for reassurance, and repeat.
That is really harsh Ellen. It’s true that you only see one side of the story but please don’t knock the progress that I have made!
Back in January I wasn’t eating, I was at the doctors twice a week, I lived on google and I was cutting off my own moles due to panic from HA.
Fast forward ten months and the worst part of my HA is asking for opinions on a forum.
Yes, I’ve looked at your link. I’ve seen it before. I currently take medication, attend CBT and have started to exercise. I’m trying my best. More than you know.
So forgive me for coming online to the onlyboutlet I have to talk about my concerns.
I won’t be doing it anymore!
I am so sorry that you find it harsh, it was meant to be realistic but not unfair.
Perhaps there are parts of your story that are not apparent.
In my defence I see your post pattern, split between reassurance seeking and looking for the answer.
I was truly only trying to help.
You have said that you have seen the links.
Have you actually tried engaging with a programme that has real results to get you what you have posted that you want?
unicorndusy
10-10-18, 22:02
I too have recently developed this fear. In fact tomorrow I'm seeing my doctor about a mole that looks kinda similar to yours. Melanoma is not something your doctor will want to take any sort of risk with. I hope you find peace soon.
I too have recently developed this fear. In fact tomorrow I'm seeing my doctor about a mole that looks kinda similar to yours. Melanoma is not something your doctor will want to take any sort of risk with. I hope you find peace soon.
Thanks unicorn! Please let me know how it goes!
I cannot get an appointment with my doctor til the 23rd 😩
Both my Mam and me have skin "issues" like this. Both for different reasons. All fine reasons!! Nothing sinister.
Where I work (A care home, where the people living there mostly lived in Africa during a time where there wasn't a lot of skin cream or how to protect your skin) are being checked for skin issues by the gp that works there only only 3-9 months depending on the different cares needs. (They are aged between 70-90). They can spot changes right away, if you had someone shrug it off in July and by a derm. It's most likely nothing!
Thanks so much Sarah!
My GP in July didn’t so much shrug it off ;I know I didn’t explain this earlier) she said that because it was still so small there was no urgency yet, so to take a photo of it and then forget about it for a month. Then, if after a month it has changed, to come back.
But it hadn’t changed. So I didn’t go back.
Now, three months later I think it has changed but in such a subtle way. It may even just be regression.
I’m calming down abit now though. I keep reminding myself that it’s small, therefore IF it’s anything nasty it should be in it’s early stages and therefore very curable!
I still wish I could get someone to look at it for me though!
Maybe try going to Boots pharmacy or lloyds (I'm not sure if you have one of those in England!). I know for sure Boots have a skin cancer screening thing. My Mam went in once before (She in no way worries about her health, she has high blood pressure and they take your blood pressue in boots and she asked while there) for a issue and they were able to tell her on the spot that it didn't meet any of the worrisome issues.
I'm not trying to like say you have to go to the doctor or anything. It's just maybe if you an get it seen to and over with, you can move along more quickly!
Maybe try going to Boots pharmacy or lloyds (I'm not sure if you have one of those in England!). I know for sure Boots have a skin cancer screening thing. My Mam went in once before (She in no way worries about her health, she has high blood pressure and they take your blood pressue in boots and she asked while there) for a issue and they were able to tell her on the spot that it didn't meet any of the worrisome issues.
I'm not trying to like say you have to go to the doctor or anything. It's just maybe if you an get it seen to and over with, you can move along more quickly!
Oh wow, I didn’t know Boots offered that service!!! I’ve just looked it up though, and what they do is they use a scanning device to identify ABCDs of a mole and determine the risk based on that.
Unfortunately my mole is s bit unique due to being a recurrent nevus-these used to be known as a pseudo-melanoma due to its melanoma-like appearance. So it would come up as high risk because of its shape. So I need to speak with a specialist who knows the history of it and can assess whether or not the changes are risky, rather than just judge it on its appearance.
Thanks so much for the info about boots though!!!! I’ve learned something new! And I’m sure I’ll have other moles that I’ll use that service for in the future!
unicorndusy
11-10-18, 14:54
Update: I went to the doctors today and saw my GP who was very thorough and re-assuring. After examination, she said she thinks mine is a cyst and has prescribed an anti-biotic cream for me to try for two weeks and booked me in for a review in two weeks if it hasn't resolved. She said if it doesn't disappear she'll freeze it off. I asked her about the big C and she said mine looks nothing like it, and explained to me that they change colour dramatically and other things happen which would be alarming. I feel very re-assured now I hope you are feeling much better.
Update: I went to the doctors today and saw my GP who was very thorough and re-assuring. After examination, she said she thinks mine is a cyst and has prescribed an anti-biotic cream for me to try for two weeks and booked me in for a review in two weeks if it hasn't resolved. She said if it doesn't disappear she'll freeze it off. I asked her about the big C and she said mine looks nothing like it, and explained to me that they change colour dramatically and other things happen which would be alarming. I feel very re-assured now I hope you are feeling much better.
That’s great news unicorn! Thanks so much for coming back with an update!
So am I right in thinking your “mole” wasn’t a mole at all?! Was it pigmented?!
---------- Post added at 15:06 ---------- Previous post was at 15:03 ----------
What your doctor said about how it would change colour dramatically etc, reminds me of something my auntie said.
She was diagnosed with a melanoma two years ago, and she said that when a mole really is a melanoma, there is no doubting it because it looks very, very nasty! Hers occurred in a mole that she’d had all her life!
unicorndusy
11-10-18, 15:21
That’s great news unicorn! Thanks so much for coming back with an update!
So am I right in thinking your “mole” wasn’t a mole at all?! Was it pigmented?!
---------- Post added at 15:06 ---------- Previous post was at 15:03 ----------
What your doctor said about how it would change colour dramatically etc, reminds me of something my auntie said.
She was diagnosed with a melanoma two years ago, and she said that when a mole really is a melanoma, there is no doubting it because it looks very, very nasty! Hers occurred in a mole that she’d had all her life!
No it is a mole, but with a cyst growing on top of it if that makes sense. I've had the mole my entire life but this cyst is recent-ish. Your auntie is very right, they do look so different when they are malignant. I think with all the newspapers writing about all these horror stories makes us fear that we have it too.
No it is a mole, but with a cyst growing on top of it if that makes sense. I've had the mole my entire life but this cyst is recent-ish. Your auntie is very right, they do look so different when they are malignant. I think with all the newspapers writing about all these horror stories makes us fear that we have it too.
Oh wow, how unlucky that the cyst grow on a mole! That would have freaked me out! I’m so glad your doctor was able to reassure you though. I had a mole frozen off in March, it’s actislly really satisfying! Watching the ugly thing slowly disappear over the course of two weeks was such a good feeling!
Hopefully your antibiotics will take care of it and it won’t come to that for you though!
WiseMonkey
11-10-18, 22:18
The Drs here in New Zealand have a special glass they look through to see if a mole is looking like a melanoma. It's the same as the ones the skin specialists use. Most Dr's here do minor surgery ie removal of suspicious skin lesions.
NZ has one of the highest rates (along with Australia) of skin issues due to the intensity of the suns rays.
Moles and other skin things can grow/chnage without becoming malignant. If you're still worried just get it removed.
Moles and other skin things can grow/chnage without becoming malignant. If you're still worried just get it removed.[/QUOTE]
It is unbelievably difficult to get moles removed in the UK! Our doctors prefer the watch and wait approach unless the mole is undoubtedly suspicious looking!
I had a 1cm mole on my thigh that was three different colours, and it took me 15 years of begging before they’d remove it for me!
I had another mole on my nose which was big and in my line of vision. The NHS wouldn’t remove it for me because it was a cosmetic issue, so I had to pay £700 to have it removed at a private clinic.
UPDATE- just in case anyone is interested and also cos I need to write this down to help me accept it!
I went to see my GP today. He said it’s ok to change in shape aslong as it isn’t changing in colour and size. He said that any changes that would “raise a doctors eyebrow” would be severe and could be noticed even when standing a metre away from the mole!
He said that from a distance, mine just looks like an oval mole and to stop looking at it so closely.
How bizzare though! It goes against all the advice we hear about doing our skin checks!
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