dieanotherday
15-10-18, 23:34
Hey
Sorry long post ... quick intro, I'm late thirties, male, work from home, spend most of my time alone although I'm married with a good close family.
Glad I found this site, having a tough time with HA this year, can't seem to get out of the pattern.
When I think back, I've had various brief flair ups of HA, all sorts of things but nearly always a possible cancer symptom. All sorts from early twenties through, bowel, testicle, skin, mouth, lymph, etc.
This summer I've done many good things, be more active, join club, be more social, see more family, etc, but all under a haze of worry. It's the longest continuous HA period I've had.
Last time I went to the doc I asked to be referred for CBT. I've been on it about a month, it's online "training" plus message from support person every 2 weeks. Getting F2F counsellor will take months. I get all the concepts, it's helped with general anxiety but not really HA yet. But I'm trying... mood monitors, TFB cycles, tons of self analysis questionnaires etc. Also trying stuff like ... 2 week wait before dr.
Here are my latest concerns : -
1)
a) Left arm seems to dip randomly for split second when lifting light objects, several times a day involuntarily, plus left leg twitches on/off all day - ALS. (Just read the ALS sticky which did help a bit)
b) On/off recurring sore throat left side with possible enlarged lymph nodes - cancer
c) Centre/right chest pain when I started running, followed by possible muscle strain in same area, this is easing up a bit past few days, but .. - heart.
d) Scabby head can't get rid of it - not associated it to anything thankfully
2) Broke my wrist in 3 places 2 weeks ago, in cast, but complications, slipped 20 degrees backwards, borderline operation but going with wait and see approach based on consultation.
a) cast claustrophobia, really tight, just want it off, especially when it's first done, which is tomorrow morning recast.
b) feels like I have sores because I can't see underneath and it stings as bruising comes out
c) worried about outcome now given 20 degree displacement
Tomorrow, recast 8.30am, work meeting (from home) all tomorrow afternoon, but here's the thing ... a month ago I booked a doctors appointment for 1)b) and it's tomorrow afternoon. I'm desperately trying to clamber out of the rabbit hole to assess if I will truly benefit from this appointment to discuss all of 1)a-d). I'll have to arrange taxis there and back etc. Last time I had a really unsympathetic Dr too, I won't go into that.
My wife hasn't done all the CBT stuff of course and I don't talk about it that much, but when I did bring it up she thinks go to the appointment. In fact it'd be stupid not to go, given my belief in my symptoms and worries. But, my gut feeling from the CBT and support worker input is, long run ... assuming this is all just HA ... I should cancel it and concentrate on the fracture recovery.
Something new I'm trying this week that's helping a bit, is to make physical counter changes to the symptoms. eg sore throat left side, stop overswallowing, eat food right side, dont sit with head in funny left position. ALS stuff try to do more exercise including strength building left arm/leg, basically try to prove the opposite to clear the symptom and relieve the worry.
I guess I'm just reaching out hoping for some comments and support from other people who have similar issues, on any of the content here, whether it's the worry symptoms, whether to got to doctors or postpone, etc etc.
It's hard to hit Submit on your first post isn't it ...
Thanks in advance.
Sorry long post ... quick intro, I'm late thirties, male, work from home, spend most of my time alone although I'm married with a good close family.
Glad I found this site, having a tough time with HA this year, can't seem to get out of the pattern.
When I think back, I've had various brief flair ups of HA, all sorts of things but nearly always a possible cancer symptom. All sorts from early twenties through, bowel, testicle, skin, mouth, lymph, etc.
This summer I've done many good things, be more active, join club, be more social, see more family, etc, but all under a haze of worry. It's the longest continuous HA period I've had.
Last time I went to the doc I asked to be referred for CBT. I've been on it about a month, it's online "training" plus message from support person every 2 weeks. Getting F2F counsellor will take months. I get all the concepts, it's helped with general anxiety but not really HA yet. But I'm trying... mood monitors, TFB cycles, tons of self analysis questionnaires etc. Also trying stuff like ... 2 week wait before dr.
Here are my latest concerns : -
1)
a) Left arm seems to dip randomly for split second when lifting light objects, several times a day involuntarily, plus left leg twitches on/off all day - ALS. (Just read the ALS sticky which did help a bit)
b) On/off recurring sore throat left side with possible enlarged lymph nodes - cancer
c) Centre/right chest pain when I started running, followed by possible muscle strain in same area, this is easing up a bit past few days, but .. - heart.
d) Scabby head can't get rid of it - not associated it to anything thankfully
2) Broke my wrist in 3 places 2 weeks ago, in cast, but complications, slipped 20 degrees backwards, borderline operation but going with wait and see approach based on consultation.
a) cast claustrophobia, really tight, just want it off, especially when it's first done, which is tomorrow morning recast.
b) feels like I have sores because I can't see underneath and it stings as bruising comes out
c) worried about outcome now given 20 degree displacement
Tomorrow, recast 8.30am, work meeting (from home) all tomorrow afternoon, but here's the thing ... a month ago I booked a doctors appointment for 1)b) and it's tomorrow afternoon. I'm desperately trying to clamber out of the rabbit hole to assess if I will truly benefit from this appointment to discuss all of 1)a-d). I'll have to arrange taxis there and back etc. Last time I had a really unsympathetic Dr too, I won't go into that.
My wife hasn't done all the CBT stuff of course and I don't talk about it that much, but when I did bring it up she thinks go to the appointment. In fact it'd be stupid not to go, given my belief in my symptoms and worries. But, my gut feeling from the CBT and support worker input is, long run ... assuming this is all just HA ... I should cancel it and concentrate on the fracture recovery.
Something new I'm trying this week that's helping a bit, is to make physical counter changes to the symptoms. eg sore throat left side, stop overswallowing, eat food right side, dont sit with head in funny left position. ALS stuff try to do more exercise including strength building left arm/leg, basically try to prove the opposite to clear the symptom and relieve the worry.
I guess I'm just reaching out hoping for some comments and support from other people who have similar issues, on any of the content here, whether it's the worry symptoms, whether to got to doctors or postpone, etc etc.
It's hard to hit Submit on your first post isn't it ...
Thanks in advance.