LouiseAndy
19-10-18, 21:24
So, I'm really facing a bad time at the moment.
I have a number of issues that are constancy rushing around my head. Of course there's the health stuff, that's a given with me. Thinking about every pain, every odd feeling. I try to remind myself off all the good results I had but there's so many what if's buzzing around my head. I was able to cope with this for awhile but it's really wrecking me again. I won't go into it to much as I have other post about it. (https://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=224978). I'm really struggling. I'm so exhausted from this....Then of course I worry if there a real reason behind my exhaustion.
Secondly, I'm constantly worried about my relationship. My boyfriend recently made the choice to move back to his own country to further himself . Which I'm so proud of, that his living his best life. Yet I've felt this like need to over-push things? I guess is the way to say it. Like I feel like my emotions are more extreme now. Either I'm all mushy or very distant.
Sometimes I guess I get this idea where it's like! It's easier if I end this. Yet I know that's not true. My boyfriend is amazing, he supports me. His helped me in ways lots of people haven't- but also tells me that's important that I can and want to support and help myself. So I know in a way I'm pushing my negative feelings onto him.
Next...Uni. Oh beans, oh jezz. This is just over-working me. I used to love going, to get myself into gear and bust through classes. Now it's a constant worry and burden.
Then there's family worries- Friends worries. I made a promise to myself awhile I wouldn't rant to anyone anymore about my health worries but this seemed to push into everyday life about everything. So, I just feel so alone. Sorry for venting so much. I couldn't even bring myself to write down everything that was pushing on my chest in fear of annoying anyone. I don't mean to be so needy. I'm sorry.
P.S I am in therapy, there's just a gap in session now as my therapist has had to take personal level. I've tried meds before but they didn't work for me.
I have a number of issues that are constancy rushing around my head. Of course there's the health stuff, that's a given with me. Thinking about every pain, every odd feeling. I try to remind myself off all the good results I had but there's so many what if's buzzing around my head. I was able to cope with this for awhile but it's really wrecking me again. I won't go into it to much as I have other post about it. (https://www.nomorepanic.co.uk/showthread.php?t=224978). I'm really struggling. I'm so exhausted from this....Then of course I worry if there a real reason behind my exhaustion.
Secondly, I'm constantly worried about my relationship. My boyfriend recently made the choice to move back to his own country to further himself . Which I'm so proud of, that his living his best life. Yet I've felt this like need to over-push things? I guess is the way to say it. Like I feel like my emotions are more extreme now. Either I'm all mushy or very distant.
Sometimes I guess I get this idea where it's like! It's easier if I end this. Yet I know that's not true. My boyfriend is amazing, he supports me. His helped me in ways lots of people haven't- but also tells me that's important that I can and want to support and help myself. So I know in a way I'm pushing my negative feelings onto him.
Next...Uni. Oh beans, oh jezz. This is just over-working me. I used to love going, to get myself into gear and bust through classes. Now it's a constant worry and burden.
Then there's family worries- Friends worries. I made a promise to myself awhile I wouldn't rant to anyone anymore about my health worries but this seemed to push into everyday life about everything. So, I just feel so alone. Sorry for venting so much. I couldn't even bring myself to write down everything that was pushing on my chest in fear of annoying anyone. I don't mean to be so needy. I'm sorry.
P.S I am in therapy, there's just a gap in session now as my therapist has had to take personal level. I've tried meds before but they didn't work for me.