WhatNext
02-11-18, 14:31
I've had OCD for many many years and in the past I've had therapy and it did help but I'm finding is that my disease seems to migrate to other parts of my life and manifests itself in varying forms.
I'm an engineer and my work is life critical and a mistake could easily hurt someone, so over the years I've developed a very careful approach to my work. But I struggle with checking and don't seem to be able to trust myself. It makes my work extremely distressing for me and I'm tired of it. I've considered a change in career just to avoid the daily torment but I've done this for so long I'm not sure what else I could do. I'd love to work in the countryside away from the strains and stresses of modern day life and earn enough to keep a roof over my family's heads but these jobs are not available where I live.
I've been in hospital numerous times and when I do it sets me back as it often takes many weeks to get out and back on my feet. I tend to turn to alcohol when times are stressful but this eventually causes other issues which normally means being sectioned and locked up and then put on a cocktail of drugs. I'm not dangerous to other people but considered a risk to myself.
I've referred myself back into the system reluctantly as having these on my medical record has affected my ability to get insurance as it would appear that I'm a risk.
I'm starting to think that I'm so damaged now that getting cured is almost impossible as the answers are really my behaviour and the cure is how I stop.
I'm an engineer and my work is life critical and a mistake could easily hurt someone, so over the years I've developed a very careful approach to my work. But I struggle with checking and don't seem to be able to trust myself. It makes my work extremely distressing for me and I'm tired of it. I've considered a change in career just to avoid the daily torment but I've done this for so long I'm not sure what else I could do. I'd love to work in the countryside away from the strains and stresses of modern day life and earn enough to keep a roof over my family's heads but these jobs are not available where I live.
I've been in hospital numerous times and when I do it sets me back as it often takes many weeks to get out and back on my feet. I tend to turn to alcohol when times are stressful but this eventually causes other issues which normally means being sectioned and locked up and then put on a cocktail of drugs. I'm not dangerous to other people but considered a risk to myself.
I've referred myself back into the system reluctantly as having these on my medical record has affected my ability to get insurance as it would appear that I'm a risk.
I'm starting to think that I'm so damaged now that getting cured is almost impossible as the answers are really my behaviour and the cure is how I stop.