I don't want "it" any more

[Jules18]

What have I done to myself? I either have anxiety or I have the constant thought that I'm not me. The unreal feelings have gone, so I should be grateful and getting on with my life shouldn't I? But no, I've got this continuous sort of mantra in my head that I'm just not me. Is this still part of depersonalization or have I thought myself into some horrible nightmare? The problem is made worse by the fact that I never even glimpse the old me or feel like my old self. There is just no respite and I don't know how much longer I can take this. Does anyone else have this or experience this? I just don't know what to do - I just want to be like I used to be, it's not much to ask out of life is it? Thanks for letting me rant, I feel like I've burdened by husband enough recently and there's only so many times he can say "Yes, you're you, you're going to be OK". Although I don't really want anyone to be having the same horrible thoughts as me, I would still like reassurance that it's not just me that's doing this!

Thanks.

[SammiB]

I'm sorry to hear of your troubles Jules

Just wanted to say that, your not alone, i always think that i'm not me, i've now changed into someone new and who i don't like, but i think that you are getting better, just have to think yes the unreal feelings have gone only these left to go, and they will go. you are still you inside, just have to wait till the fog clears and you'll see clearly again.

wish you all the best

xxx

[soggypops]

Ah poor you.:hugs:

I think i can speak for most of us, we have all been there and some still are.
Its all part of your ilness. I can have many personalities, in fact in certain situations i act how i think people want me to act or be. So im so used to fooling people and hiding my ilness that i dont know who the real me is. So your not alone.
Are you on any medication? or having CB therapy. If not ask your doctor to refer you.

Hope this helps
E
x

[cattttt]

What is the real me? We all change as we move through life and all our experiences change who and what we are. If you think back to how you were ten years ago, it's different to how you were five years ago. If you have a significant life event, such as a serious illness or a life threatening event, the change is more rapid and noticable.
A bad episode of anxiety is like a serious illness, it changes you, so maybe you aren't the same as you used to be, but does that matter?
Maybe the new you is better than the old you, or maybe just different.
I had a six months of bad anxiety earlier this year and it's definately changed me.
How about getting some councelling and trying to sort out exactly what your thoughts are, you sound so confused about it.
A big hug for you in the meantime.