Relapsing into this stupid fear

[textsfromthemoon]

Hey everyone, it's been a while since I've made a post here, but this past week I've really been struggling, it's been quite a while since my rabies fear has really been an issue and I'm just having trouble rationalizing my anxiety brain and I find reading what some of the "regulars" who post here have to say really helps me

So it all started earlier this week when I had a nightmare about my rabies fear, it started coming back into my mind a bit after that, but last night is when it became bad again, I work second shift in a shelter and my supervisor had asked me to go through the kitchen and remove expired food as we're getting a big order of new food next month. So it was about 10:30 pm and I was taking some bags of food to the dumpster, our shelter is quite literally in the middle of the woods and the garbage dumpster is at the bottom of our long driveway, so I brought the garbage down in a wagon and then went back into the building. About 15 minutes later I washed my hands after using the toilet and felt a stinging on my hand, I looked down and noticed two small cuts or sort of "pin prick" looking type things next to each other on my hand, since then I've of course been freaking out that somehow a bat bit my hand and thats where the marks came from, I've been trying to work through things logically, I didn't see any bats (but of course anxiety brain is saying "oh it was dark") and its the dead of winter and I live in the north so I'm not sure that bats are even active at this time (we do have bats in my area in the summer. but its around 20 degrees F most days so I'm guessing they're hibernating or have migraited?) I read the stickied thread again which helped a bit but my anxiety brain is so loud right now, any tips on silencing that part of me? I just keep looking at my hand and thinking how much it looks like a bite :(

[GRVY]

20 degrees. Bats are not out. Either migrated or hibernated. I hope this helps.

[textsfromthemoon]

Hey thank you for replying, it definitely does help, I did actually look that up (I know Googling isn’t the best to do but I tried to stay away from fear mongering stuff and stuck to just factual sites) and learned that the hibernation/migration time for bats in my area is typically mid-October-April so you were right :) thank you again I appreciate it! I’m trying my best to fight this fear but it’s been sort of coming and going all day :/

[Darksky]

We have bats that actually live in our house under the eaves. They are definately hibernating this time of year, I haven't seen them for ages.

Don't worry xx

[Double_Rainbow]

We have bats that actually live in our house under the eaves. They are definately hibernating this time of year, I haven't seen them for ages.

Don't worry xx
Oh Dear Lord... I hope they don't get into the house, do they? Not now obviously, but when it is a warm season?

[Darksky]

No they don't get in the house even with open windows but I look at them totally differently. I don't have a rabies thing and I love my bats. They are amazing, the way they swoop so close but their sonar has them diverting at the last second. Sitting in the garden watching them is lovely.

I bet you think I'm totally nuts :roflmao:

[Double_Rainbow]

No they don't get in the house even with open windows but I look at them totally differently. I don't have a rabies thing and I love my bats. They are amazing, the way they swoop so close but their sonar has them diverting at the last second. Sitting in the garden watching them is lovely.

I bet you think I'm totally nuts :roflmao:
IDK how I feel about it, quite honestly. The fear of bats never really was my thing until very recently. It still isn't, not as much as others seem to have around here. But I certainly won't touch them or knowingly go very near them. Quite honestly, I wouldn't want them in my house either, since I have little kids. When I read the recent rabies death of a 6 year old in Florida, it breaks my heart. This could have been easily avoided if the father was more cautious.

[textsfromthemoon]

Darksky, my mom likes to sit on the deck at her house and watch the bats in the summer too, they’re always swooping between the trees catching bugs and things! though I guess it makes sense they’re hibernating now, haven’t seen any bugs in ages because of the cold so I imagine there wouldn’t be much for them to eat.

I’m trying to remind myself that a bat couldn’t come up and bite my hand and fly away without me noticing it, even in the dark? That’s where my anxiety comes in, it was dark out as it was nighttime and the two cuts on my hand became noticeable right after I went inside, but they didn’t bleed or anything which I’m assuming a bite would? It looks like little abrasions on my skin, maybe from wrestling those heavy bags into a giant dumpster (I’m short! :doh:)

[Fishmanpa]

I’m trying to remind myself that a bat couldn’t come up and bite my hand and fly away without me noticing it, even in the dark? That’s where my anxiety comes in, it was dark out as it was nighttime and the two cuts on my hand became noticeable right after I went inside, but they didn’t bleed or anything which I’m assuming a bite would? It looks like little abrasions on my skin, maybe from wrestling those heavy bags into a giant dumpster (I’m short! :doh:)

I want you to notice what you did. You changed factual statements into reassurance seeking questions. Take the question marks away and you have facts with no room for anxiety and speculation.

Positive thoughts

[GRVY]

I never really had a rabies fear until late this year. I am still not afraid of bats. As kids we used to go out in the evening and shoot our nerf guns in the air to watch the bats follow the nerf bullets all they ways down to the ground and then pull up at the last second. We built bat houses and had bats living in our trees and under our front porch. We occasionally had them in the house too but my dad always caught them and released them.

[textsfromthemoon]

I want you to notice what you did. You changed factual statements into reassurance seeking questions. Take the question marks away and you have facts with no room for anxiety and speculation.

Positive thoughts

Wow thank you so much, this actually really helps!! Everytime I've started to feel anxious I've come back and re-read what I said and it really helps me to feel calmer!

Thank you to everyone who has responded, I appreiciate it :)

[textsfromthemoon]

So I wanted to share partly because venting helps and partly because I'm proud of myself for doing something logical (for once lol), I was proud of myself for not googling today, got home from work around 12:30 and thought I would relax while scrolling Reddit on my phone, open up the Reddit app and what do I see on my front page but a post about freaking rabies, of course my HA took over and I started reading everything (BIG MISTAKE DUH!!) and I got myself all worked up (again..DUHHH :doh:)

Anyway by this point its 2:30am and I'm here convinced yet again somehow I'm the victim of the ever popular and sneaky ninja bat, I of course immediately want to reassurance seek and wake my boyfriend up but then I remembered this thread and thought...lets try using logic. Anyway this lead me to try instead of looking up something terrifying lets look up something logical, which lead me to learn that even the smallest bats where I live have an average wingspan of 11 inches!! That would be like someone chucking a ruler at me and me somehow not noticing! That would be one hell of a ninja bat for sure for it to bite my hand without me seeing it :roflmao: so feeling much calmer now and even though I took a bit of a step back tonight I think brought myself back to where I need to be, this is probably kind of a pointless edition to my post but felt like sharing

[Midnight-mouse]

...lets try using logic.

I took a bit of a step back tonight I think brought myself back to where I need to be, this is probably kind of a pointless edition to my post but felt like sharing


On the contrary! This is exactly the sort of thing that should be updated on! You did great to use logic to calm yourself as opposed to relying on the temporary reassurances of others.

Go you! - seriously and wholeheartedly.

Positive vibes,

Mouse x



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[Fishmanpa]

Good job MMouse!

Positive thoughts

[textsfromthemoon]

On the contrary! This is exactly the sort of thing that should be updated on! You did great to use logic to calm yourself as opposed to relying on the temporary reassurances of others.

Go you! - seriously and wholeheartedly.

Positive vibes,

Mouse x



Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

Wow thank you so much I really appreciate that! I've had some anxious moments but as a whole I've felt SO much better today so it definitely helped more than reassurance seeking does :) I'm hoping to overcome this fear for good this time

[Midnight-mouse]

I've felt SO much better today so it definitely helped more than reassurance seeking does :)


This it what it’s all about, it’s hard work sometimes but if we are going to feel better the change in thoughts has to come from ourselves. No one else can impart the change in us, you should feel proud of your self for taking the steps to take control, I know it’s a very tough step to take.

Positive vibes,

Mouse



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[textsfromthemoon]

Thank you so much Midnight-mouse! I won't lie and say I haven't been experiencing anxiety from this situation but I am trying to work through the feelings and so far they are slowly and steadily getting better and easier to manage, I'm hoping that this can be last rabies "scare" because I am so done with it

[Midnight-mouse]

because I am so done with it


I often find that when I get mad *at* the conditions and get fed up of them, I can fight back and it’s possible to make much more progress. Even in the way you have worded your reply it’s clear your aware that it’s anxiety causing your feelings of concern and you know you can fight that, I promise you are strong enough to fight.

Positive vibes,

Mouse



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[textsfromthemoon]

Thats actually a good idea, I think being mad and realizing its anxiety is helping a lot, I even saw a post online (on Reddit again wtf is going on on there!) that mentioned rabies last night, I got anxious for a minute but I tried to just force the thought out of my mind and tried my best not to spiral, I was anxious for a bit but feel okay today!

On a somewhat related note, does anyone know what kind of therapist would be best to see for a fear like this? I am interested in trying out therapy for my HA, I went to just regular talk therapy in high school for self harm and later anxiety/emet it helped but I'm not sure just generic therapy would work for something like HA?

[textsfromthemoon]

Sorry I keep coming back to this thread but I don’t want to flood up the board with new ones, so I’ve been doing okay with everything but I had a nightmare about bat bites/rabies last night and now I’m starting to feel anxious again, especially since Wednesday is 3 weeks since it all happened, I don’t think about it continually or anything but sometimes my mind will just create a thought about me getting rabies and I have to try my best not to spiral, I don’t want to be thinking about this for the next 3-8 weeks when my brain will let me consider myself “safe”
One technique that helps that I actually learned here is when I get scared or start to feel overwhelmed telling myself “we can worry about this later” and then moving the thought from my mind for the time being, I forget what it’s called but I saw it in another thread on NMP. Any other techniques that you guys use to fight anxious thoughts?

[textsfromthemoon]

Back again, just using this thread as a place to vent through this whole situation, I've been doing okay considering its past three weeks since my invisible bat incident, my anxiety keeps trying to tell me that this is the time where I'm going to "get symptoms", my neck was hurting earlier (I get a lot of tension in my neck/shoulders, I think from my jaw or something) and it got me really anxious. I don't want to fall back into this again and I don't want to sit around counting until my anxiety thinks I'm "safe".

[Double_Rainbow]

Back again, just using this thread as a place to vent through this whole situation, I've been doing okay considering its past three weeks since my invisible bat incident, my anxiety keeps trying to tell me that this is the time where I'm going to "get symptoms", my neck was hurting earlier (I get a lot of tension in my neck/shoulders, I think from my jaw or something) and it got me really anxious. I don't want to fall back into this again and I don't want to sit around counting until my anxiety thinks I'm "safe".
Yup, it does that. It's been about 5 weeks since I was bit by a pet rabbit in my right wrist. This past week, my right wrist has been aching and shaking and numbing and itching. At some point it almost convinced me that it was rabies, and this stupid head cold doesn't help either. This is definitely anxiety playing tricks on us, good for you to recognize it and don't fall for it!

[textsfromthemoon]

Just wanted to leave a message to say how things are going, its been more than 5 weeks now since my initial "incident" and I'm actually doing pretty well! I've been busy with a lot of things and have actually realized that I've been thinking about this a lot less, thank you to everyone who has replied :)

[Double_Rainbow]

Just wanted to leave a message to say how things are going, its been more than 5 weeks now since my initial "incident" and I'm actually doing pretty well! I've been busy with a lot of things and have actually realized that I've been thinking about this a lot less, thank you to everyone who has replied :)

Glad to hear that! I am doing better too. Hope it stays that way for both of us!