Constant high anxiety

[StressedEric]

I know I have other posts on here regarding DP and high anxiety and thought I was sort of managing it for a while but the last 3 days have been very difficult. The anxiety has been crippling.I cant really function, tried distractions to try and bring anxiety level down but nothing working, find it difficult just watching tv, i just staring at screen nothing going in and even writing this is difficult. Everything feels so very unreal. Feeling so tired as well. Shaking in arms constantly and keep concentrating on same thoughts going round and round my head which are the spacey DP, dizzyess, never ever going to break thru this, how can this be just anxiety, noone has it this bad, its worse than before, all which is not true but cannot convince myself however hard i try. I terrified of being alone in the house, cant sleep, no appitite, stomach aches, cant do even simple things around the house, everything I do seems to fuel the anxiety more. I just want to shut it all out. It worse in the evening. Really think i going mad and got noone to turn to. Ive been to my GP recently and didnt refer me for counselling. Feel like just staying in bed. This is the worse it has ever been. I dont know what to do.:weep:::unsure:

[crissy]

Dear Eric, As a human being we are very complicated but over the years I have realised our own brain is listening to everything you feel and say to it, I am in a mess, I can't cope with this, My anxiety is going through the roof x Please do not keep telling yourself this is how it will be, change your name to Calm Eric there are wonders within us, you just have to tap in to the right way of thinking it does get easier with time, I am 55 and still can be overcome,
but be kind to yourself xxxxxx

[ankietyjoe]

noone has it this bad

I did, for months on end. I suspect lots of other people did here too.

The techniques you use to distract yourself are worth persevering with as they tend to work better long term.

Can you pinpoint something that's happened in the last three days that's made it worse? Is it Christmas, have you had too much alcohol, have you eaten so much you have stomach issues etc?

These things can and do pass.

[Lissa101]

Yep, I've had this, really really bad, for like a year or so. The reason it lasted so long is because I was more focused on the weird feelings than tackling the root cause - anxiety. Don't let it make you miserable. Go back to your GP and demand talking therapy, live healthy, socialise, practice relaxation - whatever works for you - and it will fade x

[StressedEric]

Yep, I've had this, really really bad, for like a year or so. The reason it lasted so long is because I was more focused on the weird feelings than tackling the root cause - anxiety. Don't let it make you miserable. Go back to your GP and demand talking therapy, live healthy, socialise, practice relaxation - whatever works for you - and it will fade x

Thanks for your reassuring words. I am so greatful for you and others on the forum for all the support. I will make an appointment to go back to GP and try to get the referral for therapy hopefully i will get it although heard the waiting lists are long to see anyone.

[StressedEric]

Another day and still struggling with the high anx but know it will take time to get thru this. One thing found I am feeling exhausted and drained a lot. Doing simple housework tires me out quickly. Assume this is yet another physical symptom of anxiety?

[ankietyjoe]

Another day and still struggling with the high anx but know it will take time to get thru this. One thing found I am feeling exhausted and drained a lot. Doing simple housework tires me out quickly. Assume this is yet another physical symptom of anxiety?

Yup, constant high levels of adrenaline and cortisol.

Actively practising self calm will help with this over time (meditation, mindfulness, taking 5 minutes to sit down and control breathing etc).

Also, pay attention to nutrition. You wouldn't believe just how fast your body burns through it's resources when stressed. Most of the RDA's you read are nowhere near enough. Eat LOADS of fruit and veg.

[StressedEric]

Yup, constant high levels of adrenaline and cortisol.

Actively practising self calm will help with this over time (meditation, mindfulness, taking 5 minutes to sit down and control breathing etc).

Also, pay attention to nutrition. You wouldn't believe just how fast your body burns through it's resources when stressed. Most of the RDA's you read are nowhere near enough. Eat LOADS of fruit and veg.

Thanks for the advice. I think I need to stock up more on fruit and veg as def haven't been having a lot really. Also do you recommend any supplements to help? I have started taking magnesium 370mg tabs.

[ankietyjoe]

Thanks for the advice. I think I need to stock up more on fruit and veg as def haven't been having a lot really. Also do you recommend any supplements to help? I have started taking magnesium 370mg tabs.

In a word......YES!!

I discovered that a lot of supplements are actually pretty poor in terms of effectiveness. The little orange fizzy VitC tablets you can buy from Tesco (or anywhere, for example) are completely pointless. Most supplements need to be taken with food, some with fat (depends on their solubility).

This is what I currently take daily. I found the Bulk Powders website a goldmine for good value but high quality supplements. I also take the Solgar VitC and the organic wheatgrass juice powder. I also....eat as much organic fruit and veg as I can. I estimate it to be about 10-15 portions a day plus supplements. It might sound a lot, but if I start straying for a few days (like I have over Christmas) I really start to feel it. I think nutrition is massively overlooked in terms of anxiety. It took me a long time to realise. It's also worth noting that you need to balance your magnesium intake with potassium, so I make sure I eat plenty of potassium rich foods too. Potassium is one thing that most of us don't get enough of as we eat so much processed food these days.

https://i.ibb.co/8xctpmQ/rrgsh.jpg

[StressedEric]

In a word......YES!!

I discovered that a lot of supplements are actually pretty poor in terms of effectiveness. The little orange fizzy VitC tablets you can buy from Tesco (or anywhere, for example) are completely pointless. Most supplements need to be taken with food, some with fat (depends on their solubility).

This is what I currently take daily. I found the Bulk Powders website a goldmine for good value but high quality supplements. I also take the Solgar VitC and the organic wheatgrass juice powder. I also....eat as much organic fruit and veg as I can. I estimate it to be about 10-15 portions a day plus supplements. It might sound a lot, but if I start straying for a few days (like I have over Christmas) I really start to feel it. I think nutrition is massively overlooked in terms of anxiety. It took me a long time to realise. It's also worth noting that you need to balance your magnesium intake with potassium, so I make sure I eat plenty of potassium rich foods too. Potassium is one thing that most of us don't get enough of as we eat so much processed food these days.

https://i.ibb.co/8xctpmQ/rrgsh.jpg

Wow cheers for all the info. Def going to make changes to my diet based on what you said as def not eating very healthily. Going to start stocking up on fruit and veg and inc bananas as a additional source of potassium. Will have a look at the Bulk Powders website which I didnt know was there.
I have been taking Vit D with calcium tabs for a while now as prescribed by my doctor to a deficiency in Vit D.

[ankietyjoe]

Any reason you're taking calcium? My understanding is that it's unlikely in a modern Western diet that anybody lacks calcium, unless you're vegan, on restricted calories etc.

Incidentally, bananas aren't actually that high in potassium. Foods like avocado, potatoes (and sweet potatoes) and dried apricots are higher.

Also incidentally, I use a website called buy wholefoods online to get organic dried fruits and some different kinds of seeds as they're usually much cheaper than normal retail shops, although their nuts are expensive for some reason!

[StressedEric]

Any reason you're taking calcium? My understanding is that it's unlikely in a modern Western diet that anybody lacks calcium, unless you're vegan, on restricted calories etc.

Incidentally, bananas aren't actually that high in potassium. Foods like avocado, potatoes (and sweet potatoes) and dried apricots are higher.

Also incidentally, I use a website called buy wholefoods online to get organic dried fruits and some different kinds of seeds as they're usually much cheaper than normal retail shops, although their nuts are expensive for some reason!

The Vit D tabs prescribed by doc also contain calcium. I sure read somewhere need calcium as well for Vit D to be absorbed but I might be wrong? Obviously doc thought I needed to take them as had quite low Vit D level. Cheers fir the advice about the potassium. Might have a look at that website.

[StressedEric]

Have made changes to my diet lot more fruit and veg and now taking b vit complex, magnesium and still taking vit d.
I have started to drink green tea and chamomile tea as.opposed to.coffee. My anx is still dominating most of my day now seems I worrying about being home alone a lot more especially in evenings when it dark and constantly dwell on the awful DP symptom so much I cant switch away from thinking about it all the time now. I also feel so exhausted again in the evening. Think it more mental than physical as even concentrating on other things like writing this now i begin to feel tired. Its been getting progressively worse as time goes on. Noticed i have neen losing quite a lot of weight as well and i a slim bloke to begin with!

What hasnt helped is that just recovered from a bad head cold and bacterial conjunctivitis in both eyes at the same time. It doesnt rain but it pours...

Going to docs on Wednesday again.

[ankietyjoe]

Even now a bad infection will increase my anxiety, although not by much any more. That probably accounts for a lot of what you're feeling.

I would estimate the better diet took about 12 weeks to really start to made changes for me, that's the point at which I started to feel that I could handle more of everything.

Keep it up!

[StressedEric]

The strong DP plus anx is so hard to function through. Totally spaced out and on auto pilot. Nearly every evening it like this now with no end in sight. :wacko::weep:

[StressedEric]

As well as making changes to diet really really want to talk face to face with a counsellor or a psychiatrist about what I going through but hear the waiting lists are very long before seeing anybody. The only other option is to pay for it but its so expensive.The evenings are really difficult to get thru. Just feel like going to bed. Last time i went to doc they wouldnt even refer me to see anyone at all just handed one tel number for telephone councelling. No good for me as hard of hearing. :shrug:

Def not giving.up on the diet changes tho!

[StressedEric]

I dont know if will ever get thru this awful anxiety. The weeks go on and it seem to be getting worse as time goes on despite me adopting these changes to diet. Having intense panic attacks now when waking up in mornings when in bed - much larger rushes of adrenaline shooting thru body and the DP is so strong all I can do is just lie in bed and dont move until feel I can at least settle my mind enough get up. I still find it very hard to stop concentrating on the weird out of body DP feelings when awake. I still trying to do all the things I normally do and trying best to try and beat this but it becoming so hard. It terrifies me that I will be like this forever. I am really trying to distract myself from the feelings but only manage it for short periods before snap back to thinking.on the DP. I think I am irreversibly and permantly damaging my brain and body with all the high stress as been feeling like this for 3 months now. I question and analyse every single feeling I have and this just adds to my anxiety. my short memory is awful, doing tasks around the house just incrases the spaced out feeling. Lost a stone in weight and think will never get back to the 'old me'. It feels this is permanent. I am trying to get face to face private councelling on my work health insurance as got to see someone about this. I feel.losing control. I reluctant to take meds as worried that I will feel worse than how I am now.

[ankietyjoe]

I looked back at some family photo's recently, and it probably took me about 9 months to go from rock bottom to just about functional, so hang in there. Recovery just isn't a quick process.

Have you tried meditating? And by tried I mean put it in your schedule twice a day and practised? This is the one thing that helped me more than anything else to cope with negative feelings, panic and hopelessness. It's completely normal for it to feel like it's not working, but long term it does, as long as you understand the point of what you're doing.

I remember feeling like I would never get better vividly, but it does.

[StressedEric]

I looked back at some family photo's recently, and it probably took me about 9 months to go from rock bottom to just about functional, so hang in there. Recovery just isn't a quick process.

Have you tried meditating? And by tried I mean put it in your schedule twice a day and practised? This is the one thing that helped me more than anything else to cope with negative feelings, panic and hopelessness. It's completely normal for it to feel like it's not working, but long term it does, as long as you understand the point of what you're doing.

I remember feeling like I would never get better vividly, but it does.

I haven't tried meditation just speaking to brother he says it helped him too get thru a bad patch so I will try it.

[ankietyjoe]

There is no way I would have recovered without meditation. I am 100% sure of that.

Sounds like you have some form of adrenal fatigue too, I know exactly what you mean by adrenal spikes.

My GP was completely non responsive to my suggestions of adrenal issues, and it's very hard to test for on a long term basis. Because of that, there are no real treatments. There's too much anecdotal evidence out there to dismiss it though. It's one of those things that takes a long time to recover from.

[StressedEric]

There is no way I would have recovered without meditation. I am 100% sure of that.

Sounds like you have some form of adrenal fatigue too, I know exactly what you mean by adrenal spikes.

My GP was completely non responsive to my suggestions of adrenal issues, and it's very hard to test for on a long term basis. Because of that, there are no real treatments. There's too much anecdotal evidence out there to dismiss it though. It's one of those things that takes a long time to recover from.

I have read on adrenal fatigue i think on another post in forum and agree that likely suffering from this.

---------- Post added at 15:11 ---------- Previous post was at 14:49 ----------

I forgot to mention that i am also on fluxocillin antibiotics at the moment (500mg 4 times a day) for infection in elbow so dont know of they have contributed to the increase in anxiety. Someone told me that they can?:shrug:

[ankietyjoe]

[/COLOR]I forgot to mention that i am also on fluxocillin antibiotics at the moment (500mg 4 times a day) for infection in elbow so dont know of they have contributed to the increase in anxiety. Someone told me that they can?:shrug:


Antibiotics make me feel horrendous, and also cause severe, severe mental issues. When I take them I hallucinate and believe the television people are 'out to get me'. I'm exaggerating a little bit there, but my mind does NOT work properly when I'm on them. I take probiotics which help massively with this, especially in terms of gut bacterial recovery. Probio7 is the brand I use.

[StressedEric]

Antibiotics make me feel horrendous, and also cause severe, severe mental issues. When I take them I hallucinate and believe the television people are 'out to get me'. I'm exaggerating a little bit there, but my mind does NOT work properly when I'm on them. I take probiotics which help massively with this, especially in terms of gut bacterial recovery. Probio7 is the brand I use.

I looked up Probio 7. There is normal & advanced type. Is it best to get the advanced?

[ankietyjoe]

I looked up Probio 7. There is normal & advanced type. Is it best to get the advanced?

I started using advanced, but I now use the normal one and it works just fine. It's possible I don't even need it any more, but if I was on a course of AB's I'd take it for at least 2-3 months.

[StressedEric]

I started using advanced, but I now use the normal one and it works just fine. It's possible I don't even need it any more, but if I was on a course of AB's I'd take it for at least 2-3 months.

I think will get the normal ones. Also found interesting info that ashwagandha can help combat Adrenal fatigue and can help reduce cortisol.

[StressedEric]

Bought Probio 7 normal today and started on them. My anxiety has been very high all day my.head has been extreemely foggy and spaced out to the point that found it hard to do much at all. Blaming the antibiotics can they really cause a jump in anxiety like that?. My stomach feels off as well it like a hunger pain even though had a meal. Hope Probiotics will help with that. I'm off the hell anti things from today so hoping I start to feel at least a bit better soon. I might go to GP in week and get my B12 level checked.

[ankietyjoe]

AB's do exactly what you're describing, to me at least.

Some people it doesn't bother them. In fact....one active member here even told me I was imagining the symptoms. :huh:

But here YOU are.....describing the exact symptoms I get from AB too.....:hugs:

[StressedEric]

AB's do exactly what you're describing, to me at least.

Some people it doesn't bother them. In fact....one active member here even told me I was imagining the symptoms. :huh:

But here YOU are.....describing the exact symptoms I get from AB too.....:hugs:

I have been off the ABs for exactly 1 day now. Feel the same as yesterday. Glad to be off the hell things now. I know we need to take them sometimes but I doubt my elbow needed them as was getting better before I started them!
Real struggle today with the DP and anx still very high. Managed to drag myself into work but its so hard trying to concentrate at all. I am a software developer so need focus and concentration and I got none today. Going to try and get doc app on wed to check me out inc b12 test.

[ankietyjoe]

Usually takes about 2-3 days for the effects of AB's to wear off for me, assuming I take probiotics. My stomach will feel 'odd' for another week or two though.

For me, even after I started doing all the right things it took a good couple of months to really start feeling better.

I would urge the meditation too, that's the thing that really helped me stop focusing on how I felt, and just let it be.

Gotta attack this thing from all fronts.

[StressedEric]

Usually takes about 2-3 days for the effects of AB's to wear off for me, assuming I take probiotics. My stomach will feel 'odd' for another week or two though.

For me, even after I started doing all the right things it took a good couple of months to really start feeling better.

I would urge the meditation too, that's the thing that really helped me stop focusing on how I felt, and just let it be.

Gotta attack this thing from all fronts.

Been to docs. She has ordered a lot of different blood tests inc b12 and.thyroid etc. just to see if there is anything physical going on.Had the test earlier and will know results by Friday. The DP still very strong. When is best time to take Probiotics?

[ankietyjoe]

I'm not sure how much value I'd put in nutritional deficiency tests unless something severe shows up. There are plenty of opinions out there that believe that your body burns through it's resources when you're stressed, and therefore you're bound to be running low. Your diet should take care of that over time, including any supplements you're already taking.

I usually take my probiotics after lunch, which is really my breakfast....the first meal of the day for me. That's when I take most of my supplements.

[StressedEric]

I'm not sure how much value I'd put in nutritional deficiency tests unless something severe shows up. There are plenty of opinions out there that believe that your body burns through it's resources when you're stressed, and therefore you're bound to be running low. Your diet should take care of that over time, including any supplements you're already taking.

I usually take my probiotics after lunch, which is really my breakfast....the first meal of the day for me. That's when I take most of my supplements.

There was a lot of other blood tests outside of nutrition on the list, too many to list on here and cant remember many of them anyway. I suppose it good anyway to know if anything is going on. Cheers for the advice on the probiotics.

[ankietyjoe]

What I found with Doctors over the period of 4-5 years is that they WILL try and chase down and treat every symptom, without ever really having the ability to treat the core of the issue. It's just how the entire medical profession is set up to operate (no pun).

[StressedEric]

What I found with Doctors over the period of 4-5 years is that they WILL try and chase down and treat every symptom, without ever really having the ability to treat the core of the issue. It's just how the entire medical profession is set up to operate (no pun).

Yeah.
In other news,I think got infection in my foot now as it gone red. Going to my weekly appointment with podiatrist tomorrow. I bet they will prescribe ABs. At least got probiotics now if they do.

[StressedEric]

Update: Podiatrist didnt like the colour of my foot so sent me to A&E, got admitted and been here since Wednesday pm and pumping IV antibiotics into me now 4x a day. It doesnt rain but it pours. This is playing havoc with my DP and anx. Feeling very strange. There is a decision hanging in the balance as if the infection causing the red foot is also in the bone. Two xrays are inconclusive. Poss. MRI next. God its like a catalogue of nitemares.

[ankietyjoe]

Man that sucks. I hope you're feeling better now dude.

[StressedEric]

Man that sucks. I hope you're feeling better now dude.

Got out of hospital yesterday after 10 days being practically confined to bed as told not to walk. I dont know if it the ABs or the anxiety but feel absolutely exhausted very fatigued even though slept thru night. Feeling dizzy as well. When in hospital was always having naps. Still on oral antibiotics now for a week

[whispershadow]

I hope you get better soon, Eric :hugs:

[StressedEric]

I hope you get better soon, Eric :hugs:

Thanks. Struggling all day with high anxiety the antibiotics poss contributing to that.

[StressedEric]

Can antibiotics leave you extreemly fatigued? I just got hardly any energy and it a struggle all day. Seems to have got worse the last few days.

[StressedEric]

Can antibiotics leave you extreemly fatigued? I just got hardly any energy and it a struggle all day. Seems to have got worse the last few days.

The antibiotics I am on co amoxiclav. Reading up on it apparently it can make you feel awful. I have told Dr and they trying to get me on another one. To be honest I will be glad to get off them altogether.

[StressedEric]

The antibiotics I am on co amoxiclav. Reading up on it apparently it can make you feel awful. I have told Dr and they trying to get me on another one. To be honest I will be glad to get off them altogether.

I took.last AB tab yesterday morning but still feel very ill got absolutely no energy and very woozy. I didn't realise ABs could affect you this bad maybe this one does? Surely it would be out of system by now?

[StressedEric]

I have been losing weight due to.my constant anxiety and lost over a stone in weight the last few months and I am a slim bloke so my weight is important. I really worried that if stay anxious like this I will continue to lose so much I will end up seriously damaging my health or worse. I have a condition which means when I am healthy I only weigh usually just under 8 stone but I am now just under 7 and I am starting to seriously worry. Been to see doc today and been put on special milkshakes to try and replace the vitamins and minerals lost through the stress but I fear this won't have enough :scared15::weep:

[purplepie]

Hi Stressed Eric
I have been trying to find a thread that relates to what I am going through and your previous posts on high anxiety have really struck a chord with me. Just before Christmas I got really stressed and started crying all the time and got really agitated and since then I have been signed off work with anxiety/depression (I think it has been triggered by delayed grief). The anxiety is so high. I wake up and within 5 mins my heart starts racing and I begin to feel nauseous, I dry retch/heave and start to sweat. I don't want to get up but feel I have to. I try to get some food down even though I cannot taste it and don't really want it as I know I need to keep up my food intake or otherwise weight will drop off me. I am trying to have some things to do but don't really want to do anything. If I go out it all just feels surreal. I can feel anxiety rush through my arms like pins and needles. I had something similar 7 years ago and really thought I wouldn't have to be going down this road again.

It is not a quick fix and if it wasn't for the support of family and friends, I really don't know what I would do. I am on an AD but it doesn't seem to be doing a lot for the anxiety really, could be doing something for the depression but it is hard to say. I think if the anxiety lifted the mood would lift as it is so debilitating.

How are you stressed Eric?

[ankietyjoe]

Can antibiotics leave you extreemly fatigued? I just got hardly any energy and it a struggle all day. Seems to have got worse the last few days.

AB's absolutely fVck me for weeks. Keep taking the probiotics and eating well and it'll go eventually. Your anxiety, infection and hospital stay are not to be sniffed at either, they're significant stressors.

Just remember that recovery takes time, sometimes a long time. The important thing is to keep at it, keep being mindful and telling yourself that eventually you will recover.

As for the weight, you can only do what you can. I would focus on high calorie healthy foods like nuts,seeds, avocado and maybe some dried fruits. Try not to worry about it too much right now, you've been through an ordeal.

[StressedEric]

AB's absolutely fVck me for weeks. Keep taking the probiotics and eating well and it'll go eventually. Your anxiety, infection and hospital stay are not to be sniffed at either, they're significant stressors.

Just remember that recovery takes time, sometimes a long time. The important thing is to keep at it, keep being mindful and telling yourself that eventually you will recover.

As for the weight, you can only do what you can. I would focus on high calorie healthy foods like nuts,seeds, avocado and maybe some dried fruits. Try not to worry about it too much right now, you've been through an ordeal.

Cheers for that 👍
I had a call from the hospital Nutritionist the other day and got lots of advice from her as well and she has sent me sone written info as well. Got a follow up appointment in April.

[StressedEric]

Hi Stressed Eric
I have been trying to find a thread that relates to what I am going through and your previous posts on high anxiety have really struck a chord with me. Just before Christmas I got really stressed and started crying all the time and got really agitated and since then I have been signed off work with anxiety/depression (I think it has been triggered by delayed grief). The anxiety is so high. I wake up and within 5 mins my heart starts racing and I begin to feel nauseous, I dry retch/heave and start to sweat. I don't want to get up but feel I have to. I try to get some food down even though I cannot taste it and don't really want it as I know I need to keep up my food intake or otherwise weight will drop off me. I am trying to have some things to do but don't really want to do anything. If I go out it all just feels surreal. I can feel anxiety rush through my arms like pins and needles. I had something similar 7 years ago and really thought I wouldn't have to be going down this road again.

It is not a quick fix and if it wasn't for the support of family and friends, I really don't know what I would do. I am on an AD but it doesn't seem to be doing a lot for the anxiety really, could be doing something for the depression but it is hard to say. I think if the anxiety lifted the mood would lift as it is so debilitating.

How are you stressed Eric?

It is a daily battle. I too get the adrenaline rushes pins and needles especially in the mornings when they are very strong and have periods when have no appitite at all or stomach doesn't feel right and during these times have to force myself to eat especially now as my weight is getting a real concern.
The spaced out feeling is the scariest symptom. Some mornings I still think I am still in the dream I dreaming before waking up which is very scary and starts a big panic attack.

There are many different meds that can help with anxiety and depression and also natural remedies that can help and it may take time to find the one that works best. I am not on any ADs currently instead trying to manage my anxiety by diet. Nutrition I have learnt is a important factor in helping recovery from anxiety.

One thing to remember that you are not alone. Like you, the support of people around me be it family and friends, followers on social media on Twitter and facebook and the kind people on this forum has been invaluable to me and I too don't know what I would do without having this support. Talking DEFINITELY helps. I so far haven't had much support from GP but am still trying to get some form of councelling.

[StressedEric]

My anx is still constantky high. Had another very scary symptom. I tried to go to sleep last night and when tried to dream all I had was flashing fast memories going through my mind it was like couldn't concentrate on a paticular memory at all. I tried and couldnt even remember what I had done in the day. I tried to remember other things in my past and it was just like there was a block on my memory. It was like all my memories where scrambled. I thought I had gone mad I was very terrified. I couldnt sleep at all after that.

Can anybody relate to this symptom? Please I really need some reassurance this is just anxiety. Seems the symptoms are getting worse and out of my control.

[ankietyjoe]

Yeah I've had that exact symptom too, also during the 'peak wave' of anxiety. I used to recall addresses and birth dates just to keep reassuring myself I wasn't going mad.

[StressedEric]

Yeah it very scary. It's like every memory image flashing by at high speed like brain short circuited. I managed to break out by imagining driving thru town and thinking of he images of the places on way.
Staying over at bros tonight so have company.

[StressedEric]

Still had no councelling but a doctor I saw last week is now going to write letter to mental health team in the hospital but heard that waiting lists are so long? It seems hard trying to get councelling in a reasonable time without having to pay for it.
I made the decision to try and manage my anxiety without taking ADs and although still struggling with daily anxiety and the DP and other symptoms I had belief will eventually have better days but recently had comments (not from here) that I will not get better without ADs which has dashed any confidence I have in what I am doing and feel so lost now 😞

[ankietyjoe]

recently had comments (not from here) that I will not get better without ADs which has dashed any confidence I have in what I am doing and feel so lost now 

Absolute bullsh1t

My Doctor told me that I 'would never beat anxiety without medication'. He too, was wrong.

There are many, many people who beat horrendous anxiety without medication.

[StressedEric]

No indication from doc about the letter to hospital yet. Woke up this morning and got no emotions and shivering now. It a constant battle 😔

[purplepie]

Hi Stressed Eric
Constant high anxiety is crap, I have it at the moment for past 3 months. After a month I got a call today from my area's mental health team to take a history in order to advise my GP on any medication changes/additions I can try. I am also waiting for counselling. On the medication side of things - I had panic and anxiety for nearly 10 years and then a breakdown about 7 years ago and finally had to take something, but I am really anti med myself but have taken a low dose AD for past 5 years. However I am not sure if they have been doing anything or not?? I have upped the medication due to the last couple of months but again unsure how much it is doing for me. I wake up, me heart is pounding, I feel sickly nearly all day, I feel panicky inside and don't want to spend any length of time doing anything but feel I have to keep going because I can't relax.

How are you?

[StressedEric]

Still struggling daily. I plucked up the courage to go back to work today to see if I could cope. I had the hope that having work as a distraction would be a good thing. I managed to get thru the day (6hrs in work) but feel so fatigued now, spaced out wondering made the right choice.

[StressedEric]

Finding every day a real struggle. Every morning the dp is strong I don't know where I am when wake up. All day I feel so tired cant concentrate on anything without feeling spaced out. I have to force myself to do everything. No one outside here believes there is anything wrong with me so have to try and do all the normal things even though feel awful.

[purplepie]

I don't try to be normal anymore which helps a little but I beat myself up for feeling the way I do, I just want to feel okay and not full of internal panic/anxiety, it makes life so tiring :(
I am currently off work stressed eric, how are you getting on in work with how you are feeling, it must be exhausting!

[StressedEric]

I don't try to be normal anymore which helps a little but I beat myself up for feeling the way I do, I just want to feel okay and not full of internal panic/anxiety, it makes life so tiring :(
I am currently off work stressed eric, how are you getting on in work with how you are feeling, it must be exhausting!

I found the first day back in work manageable but as the days have gone on I found getting more and more fatigued with today being the worst.

[Carnation]

Hi Eric,

I thought I'd just post a few comments on your thread that may reassure you.
First of all, I don't take meds, never have done.
I know it helps a lot of people, but I prefer to choose alternative methods. Such as diet, exercise, relaxation, mindfulness and motivation.
I've had a look through your thread and EVERYTHING you have felt /feeling has been felt by others including myself.
I've been at my lowest point of only functioning at 20% and my maximum 80%.
I've suffered all those things you mentioned like spacey, dizzy, shaking, shivering, dp and a list as long as your arm.
The thing is Eric, is not to get frightened by the symptoms. It's your body/mind's way of protecting when life gets a bit tough, only in it's maximum form.
It's trying to tell you to rest, eat a bit more, eat the right stuff, more fluids, more sleep, more relaxing things and maybe some gentle exercise. :)
This anxiety doesn't happen to us overnight, its a culmination of different events over your life.
It's nature's way of telling you to look after yourself.
In fact it's keeping you alive and not the opposite to what we naturally think.... there's something very wrong with me. No, your brain is doing a good job to protect you!
In the last 5 years I've been up and down and I am learning to understand it more as time goes by.
And in those periods where you feel terrible and feel you can't function normally, take it as a sign that you just need a bit more tlc.
Hope you don't mind me posting Eric, a bit too long winded for chat room.
Carnation :)

[Phuzella]

I totally agree with Carnation :)

[whispershadow]

I agree with Carnation, just dropping off some hugs for you as well eric :hugs:

[purplepie]

I would like to say thank you Carnation as although the words were for stressederic, I can completely get what you are saying and it has brought comfort for me also. I am going through a really rough few months with many of the symptoms you describe and I can see why it may be a mind/body protection mode as I am currently processing delayed grief ( I lost my Sister 2.5 years ago). I feel dreadful most days with anxiety. I have good support and a good GP but It is so hard day on day.

Love to all x

[StressedEric]

Update on the possibility of councellibg: Had letter from hospital Mental health services for me to make an appointment for assessment. Well, it's a start.

It still a daily struggle. Mornings are the worst as when wake up every morning, I have to work hard to break thru the DP everything looks like it in the dream I was just dreaming. It's hard to explain. Its like the reality and the dream are sort of merged and I have to try to snap out of it.

[StressedEric]

As the weeks go on it seems to be getting worse.
Waking up every single morning now it starts with the very strong DP so dont know where I am or in the dream, the large rush of adrenaline and the sweating. I just feel like staying in bed but have to force myself to get up. the rest of the day is majority constant high anxiety, dizzyness, rushes of adrenaline, the very drunk feeling and not feeling totally in reality. I just cant break out thinking of the symptoms and if I do manage it just for a very small time I just snap back to thinking about them agan. Every day is the same.

Nearly every thing I do during the day results in more anxiety.Like if i need to go somewhere like an appointment or shopping.

Being in work does help to some degree with the DP if I really concentrate on what I doing. It seems whenever i return home from somewhere though the anxiety and the DP come on very strong and i go back to concentrating on the anxiety.. It's like I am afraid to be home. I get so exhausted too.

The one thing however which has been a good help is going on the chat room on here and meeting lots of lovely people to talk to especially in the evenings and late on.

[Aquilega]

Good morning I am at high anxiety the worst is the unbalanced feeling,but adrenaline releases,over thinking,IBS at times tinnitus ect the last 6 months I've had everything,if at times I feel the need to stay in bed which is very rarely I just keep going ,just done some gardening,nearly fell over twice (or thought I was going to but never have) had GAD for 30 years,read a book which says don't fight it just accept it,which I try and do,it says when I'm walking round Tescos don't think about how you feel(some chance when someones talking to you and you just want to get away,yes it has relatively spoilt my life but up to now I have never let anxiety stop me going anywhere or doing everything ,I have had the odd break form feeling all these symptoms,on the odd day they just disappear on their own with no help from me,its totally illogical but there you go,enjoy your day and keep smiling:)

[Carnation]

Eric, the DP you are experiencing is actually an automatic brain response to protect you when life becomes a bit too stressful. It's a temporary state and will disperse when you feel calmer in yourself.
You have a lot going on in your life with your health and wellbeing that is sure to worry you and cause you stress, let alone your daily life.
Relax when you can, distract when you can and you will come out of it when life calms down for you.
What you have to remember is it not being anything sinister or the only one who suffers with this. Your brain is working to protect you. :hugs:

[purplepie]

Hi Stressed Eric
I can completely understand where you are coming from, I am exactly the same. I want to stay in bed but can't because I am sweating, heart racing and getting more anxious. I get up and try to get on with my day but I am sat here now at 11.20 am after just having some breakfast and I am sweating, clammy, dry mouth, sickly stomach and it is really getting me down. I am not working but do put events in my day and doing some bits but like you if I plan anything my anxiety is heightened.
I have had this episode of anxiety/depression now since December and it is a daily battle. I am on clomipramine 70mg (have been on this for years at 20mg) but the upped med doesn't seem to be helping.

I am so glad people on here understand.

[TRISTAN]

I’m the same and also been going on since just before December , don’t know how much more I can take of this , on new meds too and only on week 4 !!!!!

[TRISTAN]

Really feel awful 90% of my day , is this the way it’s going to be forever ??????

[purplepie]

Hi All. I have had to have a welfare meeting today to see how I am doing and if/when I may want to go into work. I was so worked up. I so want to be back in work but the constant high anxiety that lives with me is getting me down, it is debilitating and frightening as I never know how I am going to feel one minute to the next. I am having the same symptoms as you Stressed Eric :(. I know that you all get it and I am so glad I am not alone. I didn't sleep well last night thinking of the meeting.
Like you Tristan, I feel bad for a lot of the day and I try so hard to get on with my day but I am not doing anything with pleasure as it is a slog. It it is exhausting.

[purplepie]

Also just wondering what meds you are all on now. I am on 70mg of clomipramine but think I need to get a bit higher yet? I also take a 10mg propranolol which I don't think is neither here or there (doc says I could take more but for me it's not the heart racing that bothers me as I can cope with that) I have also got 2mg of diazapam tablets and just take a half when going anywhere, like this morning. I am so scared of meds and don't want to feel out of it or drowzy. Just want to feel calm and engaged, why does that seem too much to ask?

[StressedEric]

Also just wondering what meds you are all on now. I am on 70mg of clomipramine but think I need to get a bit higher yet? I also take a 10mg propranolol which I don't think is neither here or there (doc says I could take more but for me it's not the heart racing that bothers me as I can cope with that) I have also got 2mg of diazapam tablets and just take a half when going anywhere, like this morning. I am so scared of meds and don't want to feel out of it or drowzy. Just want to feel calm and engaged, why does that seem too much to ask?

I not on any meds at the moment. I have an appointment for assessment with hospital Mental health but it not until May.. Everything seems to move so slowly when trying to get support.

[StressedEric]

I’m the same and also been going on since just before December , don’t know how much more I can take of this , on new meds too and only on week 4 !!!!!

How are you feeling on the new meds now Tristan. Are they helping with the symptoms?

[StressedEric]

Good morning I am at high anxiety the worst is the unbalanced feeling,but adrenaline releases,over thinking,IBS at times tinnitus ect the last 6 months I've had everything,if at times I feel the need to stay in bed which is very rarely I just keep going ,just done some gardening,nearly fell over twice (or thought I was going to but never have) had GAD for 30 years,read a book which says don't fight it just accept it,which I try and do,it says when I'm walking round Tescos don't think about how you feel(some chance when someones talking to you and you just want to get away,yes it has relatively spoilt my life but up to now I have never let anxiety stop me going anywhere or doing everything ,I have had the odd break form feeling all these symptoms,on the odd day they just disappear on their own with no help from me,its totally illogical but there you go,enjoy your day and keep smiling:)

I have found my balance has been affected too. When walking round shops I have found myself feeling unsteady like about to fall over. I have it at home as well when trying to do things around the house. Havent fallen over yet but just have to be careful when I go out anywhere.

[Aquilega]

Morning Eric and everyone else I have been feeling exactly the same for 3 months,light headed,nauseous,tinnitus,ect,the mornings are the worse when I first wake up,and the days are nearly as bad,but two weeks ago the anxiety almost disappeared,but then again it came back,talk about feeling exhausted all the time,the last week has been bad,but hey ho I am still able to go out shopping ect,but always feel that I would be more comfortable in bed,but keep resisting anyway enjoy your day my friends,and please don't give up,although I often feel like it,perhaps if I stopped fighting anxiety and except it,I might be better off.

[Aquilega]

Had a brilliant day yesterday done a lot of gardening felt like my old real self had come back again anxiety just went and I haven't a clue why,but to day it has returned but it has given me hope for the future:D

[StressedEric]

Had a brilliant day yesterday done a lot of gardening felt like my old real self had come back again anxiety just went and I haven't a clue why,but to day it has returned but it has given me hope for the future:D

That's great news that you had a anxiety free day yesterday. 👍

[StressedEric]

Just an update: I am still experiencing all the symptoms that I have descibed in my previous recent posts every day but trying to manage them the best I can even though it is a constant battle. As well as the anxiety I have noticed that I have times which I am quite depressed and unmotivated. Just taking each day at it comes. I'm so glad that I got the support of family and on this site as the support that I have received from doctors so far in my opinion been practically zero so far. I am frustrated that I have to wait until May even just for my assessment with the Hospital Mental Health.
One thing I have done is download a jounal/dairy app to my phone so I can write down what has been happening in day and how I feeling. Since I started making regular entries in it, it has helped me to offload my thoughts and helps with the anxiety. Also going on the Chat Room on this site in the evenings really helps as well.

[Carnation]

Hi Eric :)

Depression can come from the constant battle with anxiety. There's also the thoughts of feeling very alone and the despair of sometimes never seeing an improvement.
I can tell you that improvement does happen, but for you personally, you have a lot of stuff/worry going on in your life at the moment.
Tell yourself that is why you feel the way you do.
You do incredibly well Eric. You have a job, go out and socialise, shop and more importantly, you keep going!
Don't be so hard in yourself. :hugs:

[purplepie]

I can completely understand how you are feeling stressederic. I am both anxious and depressed and don't feel like I am getting any better even with meds, although I may nnot be on a high enough dose? I am still off work and really too anxious to go back yet which gets me down even more
You are right carnation with "There's also the thoughts of feeling very alone and the despair of sometimes never seeing an improvement."

[StressedEric]

This morning anxiety is awful. I had a job getting out of bed this morning. Just wanted to lie there all day but it just makes it worse as if doze off when wake up there will in a another wave of DP confusion, sweating etc to greet me so forced myself out of bed.

[TRISTAN]

How are you feeling on the new meds now Tristan. Are they helping with the symptoms?
Still no good , can’t function for most of the day and mornings are totally shit

[Carnation]

Sorry you feel this way Eric :hugs:
You mentioned you were tired yesterday, so maybe it is rest and relaxation you need.
That doesn't necessarily mean staying in bed.
You can still chill by getting up and maybe even catch a bit of sun today. I always find the sunshine makes me feel better.
I also think your up and coming Op will be on your mind as well as your wait for your appointment.
Look at as a blip and not a permanent state.

[Aquilega]

Morning Eric this morning has been rubbish,feel like I am walking on rubber springs,tinnitus is bad but on the plus side I have floated to the shop to get the paper and taken my dog out for a brief walk,I've decided that I if I ever wake up feeling un anxious I wouldn't know what to do (LOL) I thought that this sensation of feeling like I am going to fall going on so long now,I would have got used to it now,I wouldn't mind but it causes the old adrenalin to start churning over,have a decent day my friend.I would like to say that your not alone in how you feel but that's not going to help because we are concentrating on how we feel and not others who feel the same.

[StressedEric]

Morning Eric this morning has been rubbish,feel like I am walking on rubber springs,tinnitus is bad but on the plus side I have floated to the shop to get the paper and taken my dog out for a brief walk,I've decided that I if I ever wake up feeling un anxious I wouldn't know what to do (LOL) I thought that this sensation of feeling like I am going to fall going on so long now,I would have got used to it now,I wouldn't mind but it causes the old adrenalin to start churning over,have a decent day my friend.I would like to say that your not alone in how you feel but that's not going to help because we are concentrating on how we feel and not others who feel the same.

Sorry you have had a bad morning. I woke up to the usual DP and adrenaline which had to fight through then the shivering started. Went out to a pub with a mate this afternoon and made the mistake of having two pints of coke (as was driving) and then had a coffee back at his house which has pushed my anxiety skyward again so not feeling too great at the moment so just want to try and calm down for the rest of the evening!

[StressedEric]

Nothing has really changed the last couple of days. The usual DP which is there all the time and feeling quite anxious. On thing which has changed is that my mind feels "numb" today since waking up. I dont feel happy or sad or anything like my emotions are messed up. I dont know if it is depression mixed with the DP or and over tiredness but it is very weird sensation. Think I should take it very easy for rest of the day. I can feel the adrenaline in arms though. I got no motivation to do anything and feel very tired in waves and yawning all the time.
I still go on the chat room on here nearly every evening as it def helps me but noticed less and less people are going on it these days. I hoping that doesnt doesn't mean it will be closed down as would lose contact with the lovely people I have met on there.😔

[aprilmoon]

Hi Eric,sorry you're having a bad day,I can really empathize with a lot of what you describe.
Feel free to pm me if you want
Take care
April

[Carnation]

Can I give you a tip Eric....

If you stretch your arms and legs out when you have adrenalin it helps a bit.
Why do you think cats do that... :winks:

[StressedEric]

Hi Eric,sorry you're having a bad day,I can really empathize with a lot of what you describe.
Feel free to pm me if you want
Take care
April

Thanks April. 👍 Just been resting up today and feeling a little better now. Still tired tho.

[purplepie]

Nothing has really changed the last couple of days. The usual DP which is there all the time and feeling quite anxious. On thing which has changed is that my mind feels "numb" today since waking up. I dont feel happy or sad or anything like my emotions are messed up. I dont know if it is depression mixed with the DP or and over tiredness but it is very weird sensation. Think I should take it very easy for rest of the day. I can feel the adrenaline in arms though. I got no motivation to do anything and feel very tired in waves and yawning all the time.

I still go on the chat room on here nearly every evening as it def helps me but noticed less and less people are going on it these days. I hoping that doesnt doesn't mean it will be closed down as would lose contact with the lovely people I have met on there.

I can completely understand all the above Eric. I am in crisis at the moment, feel numb with depression and such bad nervousness/anxiety. Mental health services are going to change my med, so I am not looking forward to that but can't carry on with how I am. I have to wean off clomipramine and onto sertraline (although they may change that if I can't stomach the sert as I have tried it before and it sent me off the wall). I too have all the symptoms you have described. It sucks big time. I might start to go on the chat as it may help take my mind off stuff. What time do you go on the chat?

[StressedEric]

Can I give you a tip Eric....

If you stretch your arms and legs out when you have adrenalin it helps a bit.
Why do you think cats do that... :winks:

Been doing lots of stretching and also lion yawning today. Notice cats yawn a lot as well sometimes. 😉

[StressedEric]

I can completely understand all the above Eric. I am in crisis at the moment, feel numb with depression and such bad nervousness/anxiety. Mental health services are going to change my med, so I am not looking forward to that but can't carry on with how I am. I have to wean off clomipramine and onto sertraline (although they may change that if I can't stomach the sert as I have tried it before and it sent me off the wall). I too have all the symptoms you have described. It sucks big time. I might start to go on the chat as it may help take my mind off stuff. What time do you go on the chat?

I keep deleting messages when I want to edit them doh. 🙄. I usually go on chat later in day now after 9pm as sometimes it can be quiet on there earlier. It def helps me chatting to the lovely people on there.👍

[StressedEric]

Why does it keep deleting the message when I want to edit it??🙄
Just waking up now. Head still feels weird and tired even though slept right thru night last night. Got the usual DP and the adrenaline feelings through arms. Hope I can manage to do more today - only did a small shop yesterday as couldn't handle a long trawl around the supermarket.
I noticed my balance is not good hasn't been right for a while feel unsteady quite a lot but just been trying to ignore it. Putting it again down to anxiety. Oh well, battle on.

[StressedEric]

Why does it keep deleting the message when I want to edit it??🙄
Just waking up now. Head still feels weird and tired even though slept right thru night last night. Got the usual DP and the adrenaline feelings through arms. Hope I can manage to do more today - only did a small shop yesterday as couldn't handle a long trawl around the supermarket.
I noticed my balance is not good hasn't been right for a while feel unsteady quite a lot but just been trying to ignore it. Putting it again down to anxiety. Oh well, battle on.

Since getting up feeling very anxious now the shivering has started and trying to calm down lying on sofa. Every day is tjis constant battle 😞

[StressedEric]

I know this probably a blip the last few days but I am really really struggling today. Felt like taking today off work but going in. Shivering like a leaf and mind racing it so bad felt like staying in bed. Finding it difficult writing this. Dont know what has caused this as thought I was managing. 😢

[Carnation]

It does sound like a relapse Eric.
I'm thinking, the going back to work, some health issues, waiting for medical appointments and that Op coming up.
In your subconscious and your conscious mind, you are probably fretting and that comes out of your body in the form of anxiety symptoms.
That's what you need to tell yourself.
It's not you as a person, it's the stuff happening to you.
So for now you just need a bit more tlc. Eat and drink regularly, plenty of rest, some gentle exercise, some distraction like your piano, some comfortable conversation and plenty of sleep.
No harm will come to you, it's the fear making you feel this way and a relapse doesn't last forever.

[StressedEric]

Thanks Carn for the advice and reassurance. Yeah got a lot on mind at the moment. Feeling bit depressed today provably a result of all this anxiety.

[WiredIncorrectly]

I feel your pain StressedEric. Attacks are becoming a daily thing for me too.

Hey you play the piano? I honestly need somebody who can answer my piano related questions. I self study ABRSM. I'm not officially graded, but I 'm around level 6 for the theory. But actually playing ... that's hard. Playing chord progressions fluently is my all time goal. But I can't seem to memories the chord positions to be able to move around the paino like a do a QWERTY keyboard. This in itself has caused me a great deal of stress and anxiety because of the lack of ability to progress with playing. I have a piano, but I get so disheartened when I approach it that I've given up trying.

I know my scales, and fingering. But the actual playing of the chords is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. Harder than learning to program in assembly language lol.

Maybe you have some advice for me :)

[StressedEric]

I feel your pain StressedEric. Attacks are becoming a daily thing for me too.

Hey you play the piano? I honestly need somebody who can answer my piano related questions. I self study ABRSM. I'm not officially graded, but I 'm around level 6 for the theory. But actually playing ... that's hard. Playing chord progressions fluently is my all time goal. But I can't seem to memories the chord positions to be able to move around the paino like a do a QWERTY keyboard. This in itself has caused me a great deal of stress and anxiety because of the lack of ability to progress with playing. I have a piano, but I get so disheartened when I approach it that I've given up trying.

I know my scales, and fingering. But the actual playing of the chords is one of the hardest things I've ever had to do. Harder than learning to program in assembly language lol.

Maybe you have some advice for me :)

You doing very well - I just starting to play again after a long time so am not very good at the moment. I find the chords difficult too. I play just as a hobby really and recently bought a new electric piano as I am hoping playing it will be a good distraction from thinking about my anxiety. As I am just starting out again I probably need a bit of help myself :)
By the way, I am a software developer too mainly VB .Net.

[purplepie]

I can completely relate to all the morning anxiety symptoms, although for me they are carrying on throughout the day as I am weaning off clomipramine and onto sertraline. I am not working due to my mental health but becasue of the anxiety I can't just sit there.
Can I ask you all on this thread, does your anxiety come out in a way of thinking that you won't be able to walk around outside without your legs giving in. This is a big issue for me especially if I am talking and walking with someone. Even when watching TV, I am thinking 'how are they walking and looking so relaxed'. Its crackers I know but this anxiety is driving me mad. If I go for a walk, I am conscious of my walking legs in a DP type way as if they are a separate entity to the rest of me!!

[StressedEric]

Still finding it a real struggle. It like a all day long panic attack. Feeling quite depressed. Going to try and call the mental health team again on Tuesday to see if my assessment can be bought forward. Hopefully will get thru.

[StressedEric]

I can completely relate to all the morning anxiety symptoms, although for me they are carrying on throughout the day as I am weaning off clomipramine and onto sertraline. I am not working due to my mental health but becasue of the anxiety I can't just sit there.
Can I ask you all on this thread, does your anxiety come out in a way of thinking that you won't be able to walk around outside without your legs giving in. This is a big issue for me especially if I am talking and walking with someone. Even when watching TV, I am thinking 'how are they walking and looking so relaxed'. Its crackers I know but this anxiety is driving me mad. If I go for a walk, I am conscious of my walking legs in a DP type way as if they are a separate entity to the rest of me!!

I have found that my balance is quite bad I feel unsteady walking sometimes like going to fall over and when standing still I have to keep adjusting my stance. It def anxiety causing it as didn't have the problem before.

[Carnation]

It's all symptoms of anxiety Eric or referred to as a relapse. You won't fall, it just feels like you will fall.
And it won't last. Take your time, eat and drink regularly, plenty of rest, sleep and gentle exercise. x

[StressedEric]

Thanks for your reassurance Carn. Had a rare lie in and omg waking up I have absolutely no energy at all, extremely fatigued. I dont know if it is because of the xtra sleep or not. Got no appitite at all. It's like all the life has been sucked out of me. It awful. Had to force myself put of bed and can hardly function. Wondering if I should go to hospital or not. Has anybody else experienced this level of fatigue?

[Carnation]

I've been like that Eric.
It sounds to me like nervous exhaustion to me.
When I am going through a relapse, I can sleep till the late morning and come mid evening fall asleep on the couch until I go to bed and still feel exhausted.
I doubt whether the hospital would see you, maybe a GP first. Then again, they would probably just say rest up. x

[aprilmoon]

I've had this Eric,and I agree with Carnation about it being nervous exhaustion.would be worth a trip to the doctors,see if he can bring your appointment forward.
Hopefully you will feel a bit better as the day goes on x

[StressedEric]

Thanks Carn, April. Been feeling the same all day it been a real struggle. Been getting occasional head zaps as well and head isvery foggy. Getting really worried as it not letting up at all. Hoping feel better tomorrow.

[StressedEric]

Been to docs this morning as still having the extreme fatigue no appitite and very foggy head. I told him about my high anxiety and all my symptoms.
I expected him to say cause is nervous exhaustion hut he said it was a urinary infection and gave me antibiotics! He didnt even mention the anxiety at all even though it was clear that I was suffering.
I can't believe a uniary infection would cause my symptoms and this level of fatigue. I have had this infection before and never been feeling this ill.
I am now scared to take the antibiotics as I dont want to feel any worse than I do now! I dont fare well with antibiotics even when feeling ok. I am terrified I will end up bedridden. I feeling awful and just feel like going back to bed and stay there.

[aprilmoon]

Oh Eric, you're certainly going through it :(
That's disappointing that he didn't acknowledge your anxiety difficulties.
I would definitely take the antibiotics though,you need to get rid of this infection.
Did he not say anything about the wait for your appointment?

[aprilmoon]

Oh Eric, you're certainly going through it :(
That's disappointing that he didn't acknowledge your anxiety difficulties.
I would definitely take the antibiotics though,you need to get rid of this infection.
Did he not say anything about the wait for your appointment?

[StressedEric]

Oh Eric, you're certainly going through it :(
That's disappointing that he didn't acknowledge your anxiety difficulties.
I would definitely take the antibiotics though,you need to get rid of this infection.
Did he not say anything about the wait for your appointment?

He just seemed to ignore all what I said about anxiety altogether. No offer of meds. I was surprised by his diagnoses as I can't believe this fatigue etc would be caused by that and dont have any symptoms of this infection. Got thru to mental health team. No appointments so can't move it forward.

[aprilmoon]

Oh no
Perhaps you need to see a different GP:(
He should definitely have given you something to help while you wait,I think that's awful.
Hope the antibiotics do their stuff very soon for you.
Will be on chat if you want to pop on
Tc x

[StressedEric]

Oh no
Perhaps you need to see a different GP:(
He should definitely have given you something to help while you wait,I think that's awful.
Hope the antibiotics do their stuff very soon for you.
Will be on chat if you want to pop on
Tc x

Am at bros at the moment but will be on later.

[StressedEric]

I am wondering if I have a uniary infection that it could be the cause of my anxiety being higher.

[Carnation]

Sorry to hear what sounds like an unsuccessful visit to the GP. A urine infection? Yep, I know a bit about them as I was a carer. And I can see how your GP came to that conclusion. BUT! Anyone knows you have to be tested first in the form of a urine sample. That's a must!
The symptoms are confusion and a strong smell of urine. And sometimes a dark pee, but not always. I've never heard of a lack of appetite before with a UTI.
Anyway, you need a test. That's the only way to tell for sure.

[StressedEric]

Another day, another big panic attack. I not convinced I have a urinary infection as have had no symptoms related to having such an infection so all these antibiotics I taking are doing is pushing my already high anxiety worse and making me feel awful.

[KK77]

I'm not sure how your GP diagnosed a UI if you had no symptoms. But to ignore your anxiety is very poor practice.

Can you not see another GP at surgery?

[Carnation]

Double your intake of fluids, it will help both Eric.

[StressedEric]

Another day of high anxiety. Be glad when off these antibiotics - got two more days on them. Getting stomach aches after meals but think it again the antibiotics causing it as every time I been on them it happens.

I still find the chat room on the site helps me get through most evenings as I find theres not much on tv these days. I found that when chatting on there my anxiety isn't as bad as well. I wish more people would go on there especially evenings it's a good place to chat to other members of the site about what you up to, share problems etc. It's great to talk!

[purplepie]

Hi Stressed Eric
I am currently cross tapering fro clomipramine teo sertraline and in the early days. Still got very heightened anxiety especially if I have to interact with with other people. I get all flustered and overwhelmed and feel I am going to pass out - it is awful and ruining my life.

I forget to go into the chat room but I will try to get in there more as I know it can be a source of comfort. Are you on any medication for your anxiety at all? Do you have depression with it or is it mainly the anxiety for you?

I was a bit surprised as the other comments were regarding having a UI. I know they can bring there own symptoms but seems a bit odd that your GP didn't even acknowledge it. What is the appointment waiting list you are on? Is it to see a psychiatrist/local mental health clinic? How long have you been waiting?

[StressedEric]

Hi Stressed Eric
I am currently cross tapering fro clomipramine teo sertraline and in the early days. Still got very heightened anxiety especially if I have to interact with with other people. I get all flustered and overwhelmed and feel I am going to pass out - it is awful and ruining my life.

I forget to go into the chat room but I will try to get in there more as I know it can be a source of comfort. Are you on any medication for your anxiety at all? Do you have depression with it or is it mainly the anxiety for you?

I was a bit surprised as the other comments were regarding having a UI. I know they can bring there own symptoms but seems a bit odd that your GP didn't even acknowledge it. What is the appointment waiting list you are on? Is it to see a psychiatrist/local mental health clinic? How long have you been waiting?

I not on any medication for my anxiety currently. Maybe after the assessment this will change. I suffer mainly from anxiety and haven't had a lot of depression with it although do have periods where I am feeling quite low and have no motivation to do anything. The last couple of days have feeling a little bit better and my anxiety not so strong as usually the high anxiety makes the day very difficult so that is an improvement.

I am currently waiting for a face to face assessment with the hospital Mental health team. This is happening middle of May after I finally got the referral from a doctor at the hospital (not my GP as they wouldn't do the letter) after months of trying.

I still not convinced I have a UI but now have completed the antibiotics that they put me on. My confidence in the GPs at the practice has taken a serious hit. They just seem to ignore my anxiety and just concentrating on any physical issues tjat tjey pick up on.

[StressedEric]

Anxiety is really troubling me today feel very spaced out in dreamworld again and can't break out of it. Had a couple of good days and now it hit me hard again. Lost appitite again. Seems it one step forward then 2 steps back.
Also noticed I have lost hair as well which I have again put down to anxiety. People have told me it's "you getting older" but you don't lose it THAT quick. Feels like it half the amount it was before. Since I was concentrating on my anxiety didn't realise it was happening. 😔 Just one more thing to worry out. Really fed up.

[WiredIncorrectly]

Anxiety is really troubling me today feel very spaced out in dreamworld again and can't break out of it. Had a couple of good days and now it hit me hard again. Lost appitite again. Seems it one step forward then 2 steps back.
Also noticed I have lost hair as well which I have again put down to anxiety. People have told me it's "you getting older" but you don't lose it THAT quick. Feels like it half the amount it was before. Since I was concentrating on my anxiety didn't realise it was happening.  Just one more thing to worry out. Really fed up.

When I got to this point I needed meds to help me out.

[StressedEric]

When I got to this point I needed meds to help me out.

I have an assessment with hospital Mental health team next week.

[ankietyjoe]

I had a blip two months ago when I moved (long story, but the culmination of a 5 year/£100k legal battle).

I have also lost about half my hair in the last month or so. I could gently rub my head over the sink and I would see 20-30 hairs in it. It's normal with stress. It's not falling out so much now, by doing the normal things I did to recover before.

I recall saying before but recovery isn't linear, and it took me about a year or two to get from my lowest to just not feeling like shit all the time.

[purplepie]

I have an assessment with hospital Mental health team next week.
Glad you have an appointment, tell them everything you are feeling and go with their advice. I am still cross tapering but being under the mental health team instead of regular GP has helped so much as they are there to call if you need advice or are worried and they are professional in their field. I hope you get the help you need stressederic. Its a bloody hard long road when anxiety is your companion. I hate it with a passion and wish it on no-one. I am far from well and still off work but better than a few months ago. I live in hope of some normality!!

Hair loss is a very common symptom of anxiety, if you can please do not worry about that. If it were hair loss for some other reason such as just going bald, if you were anxiety free would you be bothered if you were bald? At my worst times with severe anxiety I wouldn't have been bothered if I woke up each morning (although not suicidal thank God) and many a time I have thought I would happily give up a limb if I knew for sure I would never suffer that debilitating faint feeling retching anxiety again.

[StressedEric]

Glad you have an appointment, tell them everything you are feeling and go with their advice. I am still cross tapering but being under the mental health team instead of regular GP has helped so much as they are there to call if you need advice or are worried and they are professional in their field. I hope you get the help you need stressederic. Its a bloody hard long road when anxiety is your companion. I hate it with a passion and wish it on no-one. I am far from well and still off work but better than a few months ago. I live in hope of some normality!!

Hair loss is a very common symptom of anxiety, if you can please do not worry about that. If it were hair loss for some other reason such as just going bald, if you were anxiety free would you be bothered if you were bald? At my worst times with severe anxiety I wouldn't have been bothered if I woke up each morning (although not suicidal thank God) and many a time I have thought I would happily give up a limb if I knew for sure I would never suffer that debilitating faint feeling retching anxiety again.

I am going to write down notes to take to the appointment so I don't miss anything out. Yes it good to have someone other than the GP to call for advice. I didn't get much help from GP. I having trouble thinking straight today the anxiety is awful and head is spinning and light headed and of course concentrating on the symptoms makes it worse but it so difficult to distract from it. Yeah I wouldn't wish this horrible illness on anybody else, it is a daily battle.
I didn't really want to get up this morning, Didn't sleep much last night. It going to be another day struggling to get things done.
I usually go on the chat room on here in evenings which is good as it goes some way to help to distract from the anxiety symptoms although the last couple of weeks there has been less and less people going on there for some reason which is a real shame as it has def helped me. Wish more people would pop in for a chat.

[StressedEric]

Really glad my assessment with mental health team is on Monday as my anxiety is becoming unbearable. Cannot stop thinking out it at all now all day even for a short time and no distraction seems to be helping. I know concentrating on the symptoms going thru my head like the unreality feeling etc make it worse but just cant not think about it at all. Constant waves of tiredness. Really need help now. Everything I do seems to give me more anxiety even small things. Being in work is very difficult. :weep:

[StressedEric]

Went to assessment today with a member of mental health team at hospital. Saw a mental health nurse not a pychiratrist. Listened to me, made lots of notes. Said I should take meds to help with my anxiety and go back to GP to get that as he cant issue meds. All he will do is write a letter back to GP based on what I said today.. So in other words I feel no further with anything. So now I am stuck back with GPs that have no interest in my anxiety and feel I got no hope.😔 No contact with mental health team direct except thru the GP so cant talk to anyone there. Meanwhile my anxiety is so high I am battling to function all day now and feel I got no support. That is the level of help i have had. The only way I will get a pychiratrist now is to pay mega money to go private. Great.

[Alde]

Went to assessment today with a member of mental health team at hospital. Saw a mental health nurse not a pychiratrist. Listened to me, made lots of notes. Said I should take meds to help with my anxiety and go back to GP to get that as he cant issue meds. All he will do is write a letter back to GP based on what I said today.. So in other words I feel no further with anything. So now I am stuck back with GPs that have no interest in my anxiety and feel I got no hope.😔 No contact with mental health team direct except thru the GP so cant talk to anyone there. Meanwhile my anxiety is so high I am battling to function all day now and feel I got no support. That is the level of help i have had. The only way I will get a pychiratrist now is to pay mega money to go private. Great.
I’ve found it exactly the same with the lack of help from the NHS Eric. I was told by a consultant at my local hospital that there were ‘loads’ of psychiatrists walking around the hospital. I think the resources to help are there but the GPs and mental health triage etc make it incredibly hard to access.

[Carnation]

I'm so sorry to hear that Eric :hugs:
I think many of us have had a similar experience.
Maybe if you took a 4 week Mindfulness course it might help. You can even do that on your own.

[WiredIncorrectly]

Went to assessment today with a member of mental health team at hospital. Saw a mental health nurse not a pychiratrist. Listened to me, made lots of notes. Said I should take meds to help with my anxiety and go back to GP to get that as he cant issue meds. All he will do is write a letter back to GP based on what I said today.. So in other words I feel no further with anything. So now I am stuck back with GPs that have no interest in my anxiety and feel I got no hope. No contact with mental health team direct except thru the GP so cant talk to anyone there. Meanwhile my anxiety is so high I am battling to function all day now and feel I got no support. That is the level of help i have had. The only way I will get a pychiratrist now is to pay mega money to go private. Great.

The mental health team are wan*ers. Sorry for my french, but my experience with them has been disgusting. I had a direct number to them, and I would often call them to speak to somebody when I was under their care. But, when I was no longer under their care they send you back to the GP. It's just going around in circles.

I often think if they just dedicate some time and effort to helping us get well then we'd be ok. But, resources don't permit that so they cycle you through like a conveyor belt. At one point I thought the best place for me was the mental hospital. I begged them to put me there many times, even recently. I feel like 1 to 1 treatment is what I need.

But since starting on the sertraline I'm much better. Still have rough patches, but it's nothing like it was. I was reluctant to take the medications. I was on them, got well, took myself off them and got unwell again. But it hit me twice as hard this time around. So I bit the bullet and so far so good.

It sucks when anxiety kills your appetite. I'm doing my next podcast on this symptom of anxiety. It messed me up for a good few weeks and I lost weight rapidly. I honestly thought I had something wrong with me. The anxiety fed itself. It wasn't until a week or so after taking the meds that my appetite returned. Now I have a new problem ... I can't stop eating.

It's a tough battle and sometimes I question how I ended up this far down the path. All we can do is take baby steps and allow time to heal and get well again.

[KK77]

The mental health team are wan*ers. Sorry for my french, but my experience with them has been disgusting. I had a direct number to them, and I would often call them to speak to somebody when I was under their care. But, when I was no longer under their care they send you back to the GP. It's just going around in circles.

.

I know the "system" stinks but what are those working as part of MHT supposed to do if you're no longer under their care? Do you mean they should speak to you regardless? I think it's harsh to blame people trying to do their job, which at times must feel very unrewarding.

(I'm not belittling your suffering BTW.)

[purplepie]

Hi Stressederic

I am sorry that you have not had the best help from the MHT. I live in the north west of england and they have been great with me. They have been supportive and although really busy, they have done what they can for me. I am still very early days of a medication change and still have really high panicky anxiety when going out and I have depression.

Have you looked at changing your GP to a more understanding practice? If you are really desperate, call your MHT back and tell them you are worried about yourself and your state of mind and what you might do to yourself if you have to carry on like that. They will have to do something. I have been off work since Christmas, I honestly don't know how you are getting through the days at work? You must be so strong.

[WiredIncorrectly]

I know the "system" stinks but what are those working as part of MHT supposed to do if you're no longer under their care? Do you mean they should speak to you regardless? I think it's harsh to blame people trying to do their job, which at times must feel very unrewarding.

(I'm not belittling your suffering BTW.)

That's the problem. The way the "system" is set up means there's no immediate help when required. Those that can help are a part of teams that require referrals. Doctor and patient relationships usually break down at this point with a feeling of hopelessness and you're left with a feeling of "where do I turn now?". I've been through it so many times.

I'm not blaming any individual. I am blaming a poor mental health care system.

[purplepie]

Hi Stressederic

I am sorry that you have not had the best help from the MHT. I live in the north west of england and they have been great with me. They have been supportive and although really busy, they have done what they can for me. I am still very early days of a medication change and still have really high panicky anxiety when going out and I have depression.

Have you looked at changing your GP to a more understanding practice? If you are really desperate, call your MHT back and tell them you are worried about yourself and your state of mind and what you might do to yourself if you have to carry on like that. They will have to do something. I have been off work since Christmas, I honestly don't know how you are getting through the days at work? You must be so strong.

[StressedEric]

Thanks for the replies. I have been to doctors today and think I have found a doctor who has been very helpful. I explained how I feeling and took time to listen. He did advise me that medication is the best treatment to help me and prescribed Citalopram as I have been on them in the past. He went through the side effects with me although I already knew them and he was willing to spend more than the "regulation" 10mins. I know it is possible to beat anxiety without medication but I have been and mentioned a lot in this thread but I think maybe I need just a little bit more help as well.
Councelling was mentioned in particular CBT but he said the waiting list is over a year. Will see how I get on.

I want to continue taking probiotics and b vits as well but unsure if this causes any problems with taking Citalopram.

[Fishmanpa]

Councelling was mentioned in particular CBT but he said the waiting list is over a year.

Why not download and work on the FREE CBT (http://cbt4panic.org/) course offered here?

Positive thoughts

[StressedEric]

I know that Citalopram could help me but I am increasingly very afraid now to start taking it. I have been telling people I going to start them.for 2days now but every time I open the packet I am scared as to what might happen, the side effects and what I will feel like as I am already feeling spaced out and have difficulty concentrating etc. I have been trying so hard to not go on meds and try to control my anxiety without them and one part of me is still thinking if I made more of an effort I could still do this even though my anxiety is currently constantly very high and finding it difficult to get tjrough the day. This indecision and fear of the med is giving me even more anxiety now I just don't know what to do. God this is so difficult. I know if I start taking the meds there is no going back but then again it could mean I feel a lot better. On the other hand I could feel a lot worse. I just got these things things round and round my head.

[BlueIris]

I can't speak for anybody else, but Citalopram gave me my life back. I spent a couple of days feeling spacy and a week feeling lightly nauseous, but the only ongoing side effects I've had are some minor fatigue and vivid dreams.

I'd urge you to at least give it a try - you might not be lucky like I was, but there's a good chance, and the difference between me now and eight months ago is like night and day.

[StressedEric]

Update: Still struggling every single day with the anxiety from moment wake up. On top of this spent most of Monday morning in a&e. My wrist swelled up and very red. It spread to my hand and part of my arm. Panicking it infection hen we the trip to a&e. Conclusion is reactive arthritis. Can't drive with this wrist so stuck in the house with the tv and anxiety for company.

[ankietyjoe]

What is your diet like on a daily/weekly basis?

[StressedEric]

What is your diet like on a daily/weekly basis?

I would say my diet been ok maybe with the exception of this week as couldn't drive until yesterday as my wrist was too painful to do so. This meant that I was starting to run out of certain things like fruit. I managed to get to supermarket yesterday and have now stocked up.

[StressedEric]

My wrist and hand less painful today and can move it more so the inflammatory tablets that I was given at the hospital are doing their job of masking the pain and working on the swelling which is a good thing. Even though not feeling great I have been working from home today and managed to get through it. Feeling very spaced out now and exhausted having a job thinking about anything just feel numb- didn't get much sleep last night either. My stomach doesn't feel right but think that a side effect of the tablets. Apparently these tabs can make you feel dizzy and can cause anxiety which isn't great so might explain why I am feeling worse. I have to take them though to help with this wrist. It been so tough recently both with the anxiety and this wrist I am completely worn out. I am struggling to find the evergy to write this.

[pulisa]

Make sure you are taking PPIs to protect your stomach from the anti inflammatories, Eric. Something like omezaprole. Or Nexium which you can buy over the counter.

[StressedEric]

Just an update. My wrist and hand are a lot better and am off the inflammatory tabs sotgats good news.
In terms of my anxiety every single day is still a struggle. My memory is getting worse, I still losing hair and the spaced out feeling is with me all day every day and is so strong sometimes I cant do anything. I get waves of tiredness still thoughout the day. My emotions are stunted I get confused easily and concentration is terrible. Even doing relatively small amounts of housework is a struggle sometimes.
I want to get my b12 levels checked as I am convinced they are low and is adding to how I feeling.
I got to try and see if I an get another appointnent with the hospital Mental health team as I feel I have no support from any doctors really and am going through this alone.
I am still trying to get on with my life despite feeling like this - I still working, socualising etc just as if I am ok but inside I am really struggling. I know I should be taking it easy and rest more and looking after myself more but I never seem to find the time so just plod on.
It difficult getting GP appointments and I cannot contact the Mental health team direct. I have seen no psychiatrist only a mental health nurse so feel that I havent really got much support from them as well. I dont really want to see a pychiatrist privately as the sessions are expensive. I just at a loss of what to do meanwhile I can feel myself getting worse as the weeks go on.

[Carnation]

Hi Eric :)
You might guess what I am going to say....
I don't think you are getting enough sleep!
Too many late nights will take its toll and a bad routine of sleep deprivation can cause a lot of your symptoms.
Try a little earlier each night and see if it makes any difference. x

[StressedEric]

I dont know why but each time I go to edit posts on mobile, it deletes the message!
I will try and get more sleep as I know this can affect how feeling. I just feel the tiredness etc is more than just lack of sleep.
I still want my b12 level checked just to rule out that this could be affecting me. Trouble is getting an appointment at docs is so difficult.
I just wish I had more support.
I am just so so fed up of feeling like this every single day there seems no end to it. I cant enjoy many of the things i used to do. I dont feel like the same person anymore. 😪

[KK77]

I dont know why but each time I go to edit posts on mobile, it deletes the message!
I will try and get more sleep as I know this can affect how feeling. I just feel the tiredness etc is more than just lack of sleep.
I still want my b12 level checked just to rule out that this could be affecting me. Trouble is getting an appointment at docs is so difficult.
I just wish I had more support.
I am just so so fed up of feeling like this every single day there seems no end to it. I cant enjoy many of the things i used to do. I dont feel like the same person anymore. 
When you go to edit a post, copy edited version before saving, and if it's deleted, you can repost it. Seems to be problem with mobile version.

Maybe you could take a Vit B Complex until you can get an appointment and see how you feel.

[ankietyjoe]

Buy some nutritional yeast and use that as a B12 supplement, and get out in the sun for an hour every day (preferably early on) without sunscreen. The combination of B12 and D3 from the sun should help with sleep more. Try eliminating all refined carbs for a while too. I'm not suggesting they're the only culprits, but I still think you need a holistic approach attacking potential stressors from all sides, and stick with that regime for as long as it takes.

You sound exactly like me two years ago, and it took me a good year to get back on my feet.

[StressedEric]

Thanks for all the advice about diet changes will see look into them.
Just an update it is getting so bad now that it got to the point I all i doing is from waking up is concentrating on the weird spaced out feeling and the DP and in my head all the time constantly all day non stop and doesn't matter how hard i try I cant think of anything else whereas before i managed in the end to distract myself from it for small bursts in the day at least. I keep on comparing how i was in previous weeks and that i am a worse now and that adds to the fear but cant stop myself from doing it. It is so terrifying and get waves of panic all the time all day and just can't convince myself the feelings will ever go. I been trying to get an appointment to see doc and have an app for next Wednesday but that seems far off when suffering like this and there's no other appointments. I terrified I will not be able to do anything at all soon and end just lying in bed. I would like to see a pychiatrust but its convincing the GP to refer me back to menral health team as cannot go to them directly. I dont know how much longer can suffer like this. I will have to give up on work and that just adds to the anxiety.

[ankietyjoe]

I can't remember if you've mentioned it before, but has your GP offered you any medication? Have you had any blood tests to rule out hormonal/vitamin deficiency?

Looks like you live in Wales? Not sure if the NHS works slightly differently there. It's difficult to know these days.

[Carnation]

Eric, I think a lot of it mY be down to dietary.
Have you been drinking the full fat milk as suggested?
Bearing in mind also that anxiety burns off calories and dehydrates more so, I think you should give your food and drink intake a serious thought and find a food plan to boost your energy and weight.
If you do that at least you can rule it out if you feel no better, but that was my situation 5 years ago, I just wasn't eating enough and felt fatigued and weird all the time. x

[StressedEric]

Just an update: The last week I feel I am becoming more and more depressed. My motivation has been awful, just don't feel like doing anything at all. I cabt concentrate on anything, I feel weak and even doing things around the house is becoming a struggle. I had a real job even getting out of bed this morning. The fatigue is awful. I am trying to do things as normal like housework etc but it is extreemly hard when all I want to do is sleep. It is awful. Going to docs tomorrow thankfully.

[StressedEric]

Been to docs. Last time I went he prescribed Citalopram but I am very scared to start taking it as I am already feeling awful and I don't know if I will be able to cope with the side effects and end up not being able to function at all. I am already expriencing fatigue and very spaced out feelings and awful anxiety. Thinking about this decision has just given me more anxiety!
All the doc said briefly is to start med and just gave me a number for low level telephone talking therapy. No CBT, No councelling. I convinced him to write to mental health team but don't know how many weeks or months it'll be before even get a response. I don't feel I have the support if I struggle on the med as I haven't got anyone in mental health team at hospital to contact direct and I feel the GP hasn't got much experience in mental health. The waiting times for appointments is awful.
I have so tried so hard to cope with my anxiety without medication since when I started this thread as I know others on here have managed it successfully. I feel a failure. I just plodded on in the hope that I will see the light at the end of the tunnel and feel better and some days I actually thought that i was but generally all that has happened his that I have just gradually got worse and worse not better. I feel the old me has truely gone. I dont know if I should just try the med or just continue and try if I can cope without it but it getting very hard now. I keep putting the packet back in cupboard every time. God this is so hard..

[ankietyjoe]

Here's a thought to ponder.

You're not actually getting worse and worse. You're in a shitty place, and your stamina is being worn down. But you're not actually getting worse and worse, it just feels like you are.

You are coping, because you're working and living your life, albeit not in a way you want to.


During my dark days I would often think about how bad things were, how one symptom turned into another, how 'I couldn't take it any more'. But...I could take it more, because I did. I didn't have any choice. I think it's common for the mental dialogue to be a little self defeating. Suffering is not failure. Taking medication is not failure. If YOU truly believe you've tried everything else and want to do it, go ahead! Have you actually taken full control of what you eat, kept up with meditation practice, exercised every day? If you have and it still hasn't worked, take the pills!

[Carnation]

Hi Eric, AJ has given you good advice and at the end of the day it has to be your choice.
Can I just say that when I was where you are now, it went on for a very long time and actually I was worse, I couldn't do the things that you are doing.
And although it seems like a permanent state, it isn't, it will eventually break, but you can't put a time on something like that.
As for the meds. Well I'm not a fan, but, a member on here who also was against taking meds eventually did and was prescribed the same as you 'citalopram'. She took the smallest dose ever, I think a quarter of the tablet to avoid the side affects and citalopram is probably the mildest anyway and she found them very helpful and got her life back. Maybe you could ask your doctor to do the same if you feel it's the only way to recover.
I agree with a lot of AJ's advice and diet, exercise, sleep plays a big part in recovery.
Maybe take the weekend to think about it and search on here for advice in citalopram, but whatever you decide to do, you will have support on here. x

[BlueIris]

Nothing worked for me before citalopram; no matter what lifestyle measures or therapies I tried, I lived the proverbial life of quiet desperation. One day, though, the desperation got too much, and I decided to give it a shot.

For what it's worth - and I know it isn't for everyone - citalopram has given me the breathing space I need to be able to take the lifestyle measures, get my head around meditation, get the sleep I need. The side effects in my case were minimal to nonexistent.

If you can't see a way around the suffering, I'd really consider giving it a shot.

[Carnation]

BlueIris, that will be very helpful to Eric, thank you for posting that. x

[Fishmanpa]

Nothing worked for me before citalopram; no matter what lifestyle measures or therapies I tried, I lived the proverbial life of quiet desperation. One day, though, the desperation got too much, and I decided to give it a shot.

There's a member here that has an extensive history of serial posting stretching back years. The threads were not unlike this and many others. This member finally took the meds prescribed (Citalopram) and you could actually see in the subsequent posts it was making a difference. As a result, this member hasn't been on the boards for close to a year.

Sometimes, as BI said, it takes getting to that place of desperation but you have an opportunity to avoid that.

Positive thoughts

[StressedEric]

Sorry for the delay in replying. Many many thanks for the help and advice. I been back to docs today and after a good talk with him I have finally decided to try Citalopram so taken my first tab this morning. Starting on 10mg.

I didn't take the decision lightly and took all the advice in the recent posts into consideration. It was getting to the stage where I needed a little extra help in getting my life back so giving the meds a chance to help.

Feeling extreemly tired and spaced out tonight but don't think 1 tab would have caused this.

[BlueIris]

That's the reaction I had, Eric, but it only lasted a couple of days.

[StressedEric]

I just been reading on the interactions with Citalopram. No grapefruit juice but that doesnt bother me but no ibuprofen shocked me as well as possible interactions with a lot of antibiotics. Quite concerned about that.

[Carnation]

Eric, your GP will only prescribe antibiotics that don't react with citalopram and you recheck that with the pharmacist.
You are right about ibuprofen, but paracetamol is ok. :)

[BlueIris]

Co-codamol is also fine. It's not ideal, but it's manageable.

[StressedEric]

It deleted message again.😔 I wanted to say I think Chamomile tea is ok with Cit but Green tea is not? Bit of a minefield knowing what is safe.
My anxiety seems higher since started Cit. Hope that settles down. Only on 2nd tab.

[BlueIris]

Could you tell me where you read about citalopram and green tea? I was never told about it and it's not something I've ever avoided.

[StressedEric]

It was some medical thing I saw online but I know you shouldn't believe everything online. Maybe I'll have a chat with a pharmacy. I not entirely sure about chamomile tea.

[BlueIris]

For what it's worth, green tea certainly hasn't given me any problems.

[StressedEric]

It deleted it again! 2nd day on cit and I am so damn tired. It early evening now and head feeling so foggy (more than before starting the med) and exhausted. Hope this goes soon. I only on 10mg!

[StressedEric]

3rd day on Citalopram. Still feeling very tired and my anxiety been very high all day and had to go into work this afternoon as well. God, hoping this settles down soon. Surely shouldn't get this on a low dose? I only on 10mg!

[StressedEric]

5th day on Cit and the fatigue and anxiety is horrendous haven't been able to do much at all just keep flopping down on the sofa. No energy. Feel detached from reality whuch is something I have had a lot but it very strong and no respite now.. Just feel like going to bed and it only mid afternoon. Really hoping this isn't going to go on for weeks as couldn't cope with that.

[Carnation]

Eric, think it's 1-2 weeks to settle and a probably a month before completely in your system.
I know it's taken a lot of courage to go on these meds and you've struggled for so long, so I'm hoping they will be beneficial for you. :)

[StressedEric]

Thanks Carn. Yeah it not pleasant at the moment the tiredness is awful - done nothing today just want to sleep all day and yawning almost constantly. Got no appetite head feels weird. I know these are common side effects so trying best to ride them out - it very hard going.

[StressedEric]

Day 9 on cit and feeling spaced out waves of sweating and anxiety bad. So tired been in bed til the afternoon. Stomach feels very off and feels worse today.. Debating if to continue on it as feeling so ill and out if it.

[Carnation]

Hi Eric, instead of just coming off of the meds, can you get an appointment or even advice on the telephone as the meds might take a couple of weeks to kick in.
I know you probably feel worse than before, but isn't that a common case when you begin the meds?
If there's light at the end of the tunnel, it might be worth the suffering. Have a look on here for other members that have gone through it Eric, then you can make up your mind.
Sorry you are going through this. x

[Carnation]

Eric, there is a post on citalopram by Suemarieeee. You should read it. It may help you. x

[StressedEric]

Thanks for your help Carn. I have looked at the thread you mentioned.
Day 13 on Cit and have noticed a change I just have no motivation at all to do anything just feel like just flopping on sofa and staying there. The tiredness is also awful. I have heard this lack of motivation is a common issue when on Cit?

[Carnation]

It's around the two weeks mark Eric, so some change will be noticeable. I wouldn't worry about no motivation if the anxiety symptoms that cripple you are dispersing. Maybe you are meant to have that chill period. I know I've spent 3 months practically lying on the sofa for most of it.
The thread I referred to says it's an incredible 3 months before she got her life back. That sounds an incredibly long time, but definitely worth it if there's eureka at the end of it and time goes quicker than you think. Think of it as six times what you have already done.
Whatever you decide to do, you still have control over that. x

[StressedEric]

Day 20 on cit. I actually didn't feel too bad yesterday apart from the morning before work. Woke up this morning and it awful I can't think straight at all and the DP is strong. Think lie in make it worse for some reason. Trying to distract myself to bring myself down but it hard.

[StressedEric]

Day 23. Yesterday wasnt too bad but the anxiety and DP strong once again today. Is this still the cit or me? Feeling exhausted and yawning all day. Doesn't help it being so warm and having TWO hospital appts today.. Feel like going to bed and it only 7:30pm.

[Carnation]

You have to take the heat into the way you are feeling and any appointment will cause you to be anxious.
And your brother being away will not help either.
You are doing so well sticking with the citalopram Eric, don't be so hard on yourself. :hugs:

[StressedEric]

I been on Citalopram for nearly two months now. It been a bit of a mixture of good days and not so good days. I noticed my motivation is almost non-existent I have to force myself to do things. The mornings are still a problem I feel so spaced out every morning without fail.
I managed the tiredness sort of ok but today it really bad. It has really hit me hard. I am totally exhausted got no energy at all. Just keep going to flop down onto sofa. It's weird as yesterday was a good day. The anxiety has also been high so that hasn't helped either. Hope this doesn't last!