LouiseAndy
07-02-19, 19:30
Hi all,
So I was in half minds about making this post. So I've had lots of health anixety like always. Lots of chest pains, acid reflux, toilet worries, lumps bumps... Now headaches!! Well I'm still here. Nearly two years since this all started and I'm still here! No matter how often Ive worried that I was about to have a heart attack (so many late nights laying there trying to feel my pulse to see if my heart was failing. This is a very often thing.)
I could talk until the cows come home about my health things yet I'm still here. That's what I kept telling myself, night after night feeling like it was my last. Sure I even have some funky chest pains and acid as I write this right now but I'm still here.
I could write a list of all the tests I've had since this started. What's been found, what wasn't found. So as other mental health and life things have started to drag me down. I've decided to force myself to take a break. Not logging everything and anything--which will be hard!! I know it will be hard not to suddenly come back and be like GUYS this time it's different!!
I'm 22, I'm in a good relationship, I have good friends. Nothing that I have feared has been wrong with me. The tests show I won't suddenly have a heart attack even matter how much my mind tells me. The list goes on and on. So I'm going to not allow myself to log in after another hour. Setting myself a two week mark limit!
I hope you're all well. I hope I can push past all of this. Much love to all of those who have time and time again tried to help me and reach out. I'm sorry if my but this it but that has made you feel like what you said didn't matter. Much love to you all x
So I was in half minds about making this post. So I've had lots of health anixety like always. Lots of chest pains, acid reflux, toilet worries, lumps bumps... Now headaches!! Well I'm still here. Nearly two years since this all started and I'm still here! No matter how often Ive worried that I was about to have a heart attack (so many late nights laying there trying to feel my pulse to see if my heart was failing. This is a very often thing.)
I could talk until the cows come home about my health things yet I'm still here. That's what I kept telling myself, night after night feeling like it was my last. Sure I even have some funky chest pains and acid as I write this right now but I'm still here.
I could write a list of all the tests I've had since this started. What's been found, what wasn't found. So as other mental health and life things have started to drag me down. I've decided to force myself to take a break. Not logging everything and anything--which will be hard!! I know it will be hard not to suddenly come back and be like GUYS this time it's different!!
I'm 22, I'm in a good relationship, I have good friends. Nothing that I have feared has been wrong with me. The tests show I won't suddenly have a heart attack even matter how much my mind tells me. The list goes on and on. So I'm going to not allow myself to log in after another hour. Setting myself a two week mark limit!
I hope you're all well. I hope I can push past all of this. Much love to all of those who have time and time again tried to help me and reach out. I'm sorry if my but this it but that has made you feel like what you said didn't matter. Much love to you all x