View Full Version : Fear of flu is taking over my life.
My health anxiety has seemingly morphed into obsessive behavior. I am terrified of getting the flu. Yesterday I was at the doctor for a shot I needed and one girl who was there was sick (the nurse gave her a mask after a bit). I keep feeling like she probably infected me and I only have a few days left. Rationally she wasn’t coughing and was on the other side of the room but I am like this constantly. I see “danger” from flu everywhere. If I sit in a cafe a usually move around a million times to find a “safe” seat. If someone coughs I freak out. What is the best way to combat these behaviors?
Move outside your comfort zone a little at a time - stay in one place a little longer than feels okay, or maybe look and mindfulness techniques that help you recognise anxious thoughts for what they are.
Unless you're very young, very old or immunocompromised, flu is very, very unlikely to seriously harm you.
good advice from blueiris.
oh honey. i feel for you. i did this last year and it sucked the joy out of at least a month of my life. i vowed not to do it again this year.
the flu last year was horrible. maybe this year i have found it easier to not worry as much since the shot is way more effective this year than it was last year, and the flu hasn't been as bad.
my son did end up getting the flu last year. it was mild and we all took tamiflu and avoided getting it.
rest easy knowing that if you've had your shot, you are well protected. and even if you do get it, it will be mild. and you can take tamiflu if you do get it.
the best thing to do for me was to stop reading about it and go on with my life.
For many years I have had a horrible flu phobia. I would track online to see outbreaks and numbers. It ruined weeks of my life due to the fear. My small son has asthma. I also was 7 months pregnant during swine flu.
Did you get the vaccine? If so it a match this year! You can still get flu but chances are it will be mild .
I got the flu winter of 2015. Sure it sucked I stayed in bed for 4 days, drank fluids, took Tamiflu and motrin and made a full recovery.
A young girl with special needs who lives in my neighborhood has the flu now. Her mother said it’s been super mild and this little girl has SEVERE respiratory risk factors.
I don’t think it’s crazy to wash your hands when I’m public. If someone is coughing like crazy I would probably scoot away but beyond that try not to obsess.
Are you doing anything to try and deal with these irrational fears?
I don’t know. It isn’t an irrational fear because flu is comlon
I don’t know. It isn’t an irrational fear because flu is comlon
When you look at some simple facts it is. Yes, the flu is common. Death by flu is ridiculously rare amounting to 80,000 people worldwide.
When you look at some more common fears on the boards like heart fears for example, where there is one heart attack every 40 seconds in America (do the math), does the flu still feel as rational?:shades: And the survival rate for the flu blows away heart disease!
Positive thoughts
I don’t know. It isn’t an irrational fear because flu is comlon
i use this rebuttal often.i have an immune disorder. i actually do. so, i have reason to be careful. and this statement of yours to so many of my continual fears. like food safety. there are so many recalls and warnings now. i didn't fear avocados until they told me it was common for listeria to be on them. bed bugs are a huge fear as well. i used to love hotels. until the bedbug returned. and it's real. they really do exisit.
so, i don't make this stuf up. as a matter of fact, my therapist told me that all my fears were founded. that's the hard part. even if it's just a slight risk, i just can't live with it. that's the difference between us and those without HA. We cannot live with any uncertainty. and the drive to make ourselves 100% safe, which is impossible, is what causes the anxiety. you cannot be 100% safe.
So, for the flu. trust me. this is a fear of mine. but last year, i actually lost friends over my fear of the flu. (long story). i refused to do that this year. i'm not sure if my commitment to not do that to myself did it, or the fact that the vaccine is very effective this year, and i'm not being bombarded with the flul scare news, not sure. but i have been living my life. i do wash my hands, and avoid people at the grocery who seem sick :) but it's not like last year. which is where you are.
you just need to know that if you got the vaccine you are good.
please don't ruin your life over this. take it from me.
AMomentofClarity
16-02-19, 13:48
I don’t know. It isn’t an irrational fear because flu is comlon
I disagree completely. Regardless of how common something is, if you’re revolving your life around fearing it, it’s irrational.
Automobile accidents account for a MUCH higher number of deaths each year than flu. Yet still, if you’re driving to work every day with sweaty palms and rapid heartbeat, paranoid of a crash, that’s in and of itself irrational.
I went through this last year because the flu was so bad and the shot so ineffective. I also have a 4 year old so it was extra hard since she's a germ factory. It was a tough winter because I tried to stay inside as much as possible, but with a kid it's very difficult to do that.
But, statistics really help me. You have to try to ignore the news - though this year hasn't been too bad since the flu is really not bad at all this year, both in terms of the severity of the strain and the number of cases (because the shot is extremely effective this year - it covers both the primary strains that are out). The media is always talking about flu deaths, but the fact is that the count isn't only flu deaths - it's flu + pneumonia deaths that occur during flu season. Yes, there are a lot of instances when someone with the flu develops pneumonia and that is why they die. But there are also SO many cases of pneumonia (particularly in older people and young children) that have nothing to do with the flu. Yet, they are still grouped into the "flu deaths" category.
The vast majority of people who get the flu recover completely in just a few days.
And, if you got the flu shot, which I assume you did if you're afraid of the flu, the illness is even more mild.
There is really nothing, objectively, to fear about the flu if you're an another otherwise health person.
Plus, I caught this year's primary strain (H1N1) back in 2009 and was completely fine and I hadn't even gotten the flu shot that year.
---------- Post added at 15:24 ---------- Previous post was at 15:21 ----------
I disagree completely. Regardless of how common something is, if you’re revolving your life around fearing it, it’s irrational.
Automobile accidents account for a MUCH higher number of deaths each year than flu. Yet still, if you’re driving to work every day with sweaty palms and rapid heartbeat, paranoid of a crash, that’s in and of itself irrational.
I agree with AMomentofClarity. Just because something is common, doesn't mean it's rational to be afraid of it. Colds are common - far more so than the flu - and it would be irrational to fear getting a cold. If we based what was and was not rational to be afraid of on what's common we'd be paralyzed completely. Tripping and falling is common, but we can't go through life afraid to walk across the room.
MyNameIsTerry
17-02-19, 05:06
I disagree completely. Regardless of how common something is, if you’re revolving your life around fearing it, it’s irrational.
Automobile accidents account for a MUCH higher number of deaths each year than flu. Yet still, if you’re driving to work every day with sweaty palms and rapid heartbeat, paranoid of a crash, that’s in and of itself irrational.
I also want to add to this and what others have said in relation to your belief this is a rational fear.
Yes, it is rational to have concern for illness or accident but it is a healthy concern that does not dictate your life and have to posting in places like this.
Think of another scenario and how your reaction would apply to it:
You fear being run over. Do you take the usual precautions e.g. look both ways? Or do you avoid roads, change direction away from oncoming vehicles, keep checking to see if there are cars coming near to you, feel constantly anxious due it, etc?
Can you see the difference between normal and abnormal response there? So, forget about rational/irrational illness and consider we are saying it is your reactions that are irrational.
Now consider your fear of flu again. Who is most likely going to need to take precautions? Most likely those with health vulnerabilities. The NHS give all such people a free flu jab each year to help. But there are always those rare cases of completely healthy people dying just as there are people who suffer things like sepsis from a common ailment millions of us get each year. You can't counter this because sometimes it's just bad luck anymore than you can stop yourself being killed by a drunk driver mounting the pavement killing you (and this happens too).
And this is another point AMOC made here, it is irrational to fear the flu to such levels when many HAers wouldn't think twice about getting in a car or going out for a night in a town they could be assaulted in or one of many other much greater fears. That's because of your blinkers. It's your thinking that needs correcting and your reactions. It's the same for all of us no matter what our triggers.
Apologies if anyone has already worked through this, I've skimmed.
---------- Post added at 05:06 ---------- Previous post was at 05:01 ----------
But, statistics really help me. You have to try to ignore the news - though this year hasn't been too bad since the flu is really not bad at all this year, both in terms of the severity of the strain and the number of cases (because the shot is extremely effective this year - it covers both the primary strains that are out). The media is always talking about flu deaths, but the fact is that the count isn't only flu deaths - it's flu + pneumonia deaths that occur during flu season. Yes, there are a lot of instances when someone with the flu develops pneumonia and that is why they die. But there are also SO many cases of pneumonia (particularly in older people and young children) that have nothing to do with the flu. Yet, they are still grouped into the "flu deaths" category.
Erin, our media go wild with stories like this. It comes to something when we have an international anxiety forum where so many Americans have heard of The Daily Mail. How many US newspapers could most Brits identify?
The Aussies on here will tell you the "Aussie flu" is just "flu" to them and ask what all the fuss is about. They have said their media don't bother with it much. And there is the difference.
It's about scaremongering media click bait. And these outlets will emphasise the worst and not mention what you have just said.
We have to be careful due to the motives of the media in question. It may not be that the situation is any different to years before but this is their corporate strategy and reflective of the lack of industry control we have.
I'm sure you've seen Piers Morgan on your TV? He used to be an editor and left for the US after he was found to have completely fabricated a piece showing British soldiers torturing POW's. It was BS, a media stunt. It was picked up because they didn't even get the correct uniforms for the unit they were trying to set up. He's a good reflection of people like The Daily Mail.
I'm sure you've seen Piers Morgan on your TV? He used to be an editor and left for the US after he was found to have completely fabricated a piece showing British soldiers torturing POW's. It was BS, a media stunt. It was picked up because they didn't even get the correct uniforms for the unit they were trying to set up. He's a good reflection of people like The Daily Mail.
I can't believe I never knew this about Piers Morgan! I've never particularly liked him, but he was always seen as a fairly serious journalist over here and even replaced Larry King on CNN for several years! (Not that CNN is very reputable in my mind, but it's not the National Inquirer... yet) Crazy! I just read his wiki page and it blew my mind! I had no clue he was a tabloid guy before coming here.
MyNameIsTerry
17-02-19, 06:45
I can't believe I never knew this about Piers Morgan! I've never particularly liked him, but he was always seen as a fairly serious journalist over here and even replaced Larry King on CNN for several years! (Not that CNN is very reputable in my mind, but it's not the National Inquirer... yet) Crazy! I just read his wiki page and it blew my mind! I had no clue he was a tabloid guy before coming here.
We have the joy of him back on TV presenting, chat show, etc. He gets a lot of stick on social media for being a bit of a bigot and for trying to stoke things up being opinionated. He's not seen as serious here at all these days. He got lucky having Simon Cowell to get his career launched in the US.
I suspect most here view him little better than Katie Hopkins and I'm sure you've heard about her. Professional trolls.
Our tabloids went through a period where they came under scrutiny and found themselves in court. What really came of it? Not much.
The Daily Mail are one of the worst and it's all their strategy. The NHS have had to publish articles on their site to explain why they, and a few others, have misled the public over health issues.
But I've seen more serious newspapers doing it too. Shortly after Trump came to power one of ours printed a full page mushroom cloud on the front page saying nuclear war would come. That may not be as significant on the HA board but the GADers may have struggled with it.
I don't know how they get away with it. Hang on, I'm being a thickie...it's money. :doh: It's maddening when you see the impact to people already struggling.
But I've seen more serious newspapers doing it too. Shortly after Trump came to power one of ours printed a full page mushroom cloud on the front page saying nuclear war would come. That may not be as significant on the HA board but the GADers may have struggled with it.
I don't know how they get away with it. Hang on, I'm being a thickie...it's money. :doh: It's maddening when you see the impact to people already struggling.
It's almost cruel. The alarmism here after Trump was elected was outrageous and it cause SO much anxiety even among people without anxiety. I know so many otherwise totally rational people who were convinced we were all going to die in nuclear holocaust. Like, they were SURE. Or that we'd suddenly fall into a repressive fascist regime... and these were really smart people. But, you can hardly blame them when they're inundated 24/7 with sensationalism. I remember a post on Facebook where one of my friends posted something about how insane it was that Trump had bombed Syria and was like - WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!! ... and I was like... um, Obama has been bombing Syria for years, guys.
It was similar with the Ebola virus a few years ago. I remember the non-stop coverage and that was right in the thick of my worst postpartum anxiety days. It was so hard to avoid the outrageous stories.
MyNameIsTerry
17-02-19, 16:55
It's almost cruel. The alarmism here after Trump was elected was outrageous and it cause SO much anxiety even among people without anxiety. I know so many otherwise totally rational people who were convinced we were all going to die in nuclear holocaust. Like, they were SURE. Or that we'd suddenly fall into a repressive fascist regime... and these were really smart people. But, you can hardly blame them when they're inundated 24/7 with sensationalism. I remember a post on Facebook where one of my friends posted something about how insane it was that Trump had bombed Syria and was like - WE'RE ALL GONNA DIE!! ... and I was like... um, Obama has been bombing Syria for years, guys.
It was similar with the Ebola virus a few years ago. I remember the non-stop coverage and that was right in the thick of my worst postpartum anxiety days. It was so hard to avoid the outrageous stories.
Yes, we were getting told Trump would cause war with NK. Whilst Trump played a part in this I take the thoughts of another member on here, hanshan, who has lived in Japan for many years (he's an Aussie) so understands about the influences of China. Only a maniac offers up their country for total destruction. Cooler heads prevail behind the scenes.
I find people seem to think the president can do anything he wants unopposed. It's strange considering he/she struggles to pass legislation. People forget the checks & balances and act as if we have emperors and kings again. :shrug: You have legislation to prevent a president going rogue just as we have legislation preventing a nuclear strike if those in charge of them don't believe the act is justified. I used to joke it was as if the president slept with an alarm clock on one bedside table and the big red button on the other :biggrin:
The same with Russia in Syria. We had news telling us we could be going to war with them. War makes money for arms merchants but it's very expensive to those going to war unless they can seize assets in the process, something that we tend to do less of in modern wars (oil accepted :winks:).
I just find it strange. Many of us have lived through the Cold War. Many of us have lived through active terrorism. I wonder whether the atmosphere would have been the same through these if the media were as bad then as now? Social media adds to it because you see real people panicking online.
I just find it strange. Many of us have lived through the Cold War. Many of us have lived through active terrorism. I wonder whether the atmosphere would have been the same through these if the media were as bad then as now? Social media adds to it because you see real people panicking online.
Can you imagine living through the Cuban Missile Crisis on social media?? I reread Thirteen Days last winter and couldn't help but imagine if Kennedy and Khrushchev had been tweeting to each other... #nuclearstandoff
MyNameIsTerry
18-02-19, 02:46
Can you imagine living through the Cuban Missile Crisis on social media?? I reread Thirteen Days last winter and couldn't help but imagine if Kennedy and Khrushchev had been tweeting to each other... #nuclearstandoff
Yeah, it would be crazy online. That was a much bigger concern and right on your doorstep by comparison to the proxy wars we all seem to fight these days (one reason why we must be unpopular in those countries).
Exploding cigars would probably have the conspiracy theorists telling us Hamlet are evil and plotting with the CIA. :D
I find people seem to think the president can do anything he wants unopposed. It's strange considering he/she struggles to pass legislation. People forget the checks & balances and act as if we have emperors and kings again. :shrug: You have legislation to prevent a president going rogue just as we have legislation preventing a nuclear strike if those in charge of them don't believe the act is justified. I used to joke it was as if the president slept with an alarm clock on one bedside table and the big red button on the other :biggrin:
not to get too political here, and hijack this flu thread, but actually....trump did just circumvent the checks and balances this past week and declare a national emergency for immigration. we are not in a national emergency. we may have an immigration issue, but it's not a crisis. so, our checks and balances are being challenged every day by this administration.
I am the same way! Almost every one of my posts on this forum are about the flu. This fear started after my child was born. Before that I’d never had a flu shot and never thought/worried about the flu at all.
I’m so sorry you’re so scared. Believe me I get it. I don’t like to travel during the winter because of my fear of the flu, and it’s really quite limiting.
Sending you a hug!
A patient in the waiting room with me seemed to have the flu he wore a mask when he came out. I was sitting about seven feet from him. What are the chances I will get the flu?
nomorepanic
03-04-19, 16:17
Hi
This is just a courtesy reply to let you know that your thread was merged with another of your threads.
Please when posting on similar topics add it onto your previous post rather than starting a new one.
It is nothing personal it is just to make it easier for people to follow your story and to give you advice as a whole.
What are the chances of me getting sick though?
I'm not sure if we have any actuaries on here. Wouldn't it be better to try and work out what you can do to control your anxiety over a condition that's hardly ever more than a nuisance?
Hi,
I think you're catastrophising what would happen if you got the flu. Unless you have an autoimmune disease or are very elderly or young, the NHS says you'll usually recover in about a week without any need for treatment or even a visit to the doctors, albeit with some unpleasant symptoms. You aren't gonna suddenly keel over with it. So even if you did get the flu you'd most likely just be feeling rubbish for a week or so. X
i'm just so worried. now i'm feeling guilty about going to the doctor's office in the first place. and i had plans with my bf this weekend, scared if im sick he'll break up with me (silly and ridiculous thought, i know).
nomorepanic
03-04-19, 18:48
You worry about these sorts of things a lot though so you should think about getting some help with that.
i am getting help but having weeks of my life ruined because of some guy in a doctor's waiting room is pretty upsetting
i'm just so worried. now i'm feeling guilty about going to the doctor's office in the first place. and i had plans with my bf this weekend, scared if im sick he'll break up with me (silly and ridiculous thought, i know).
Yeah I get that. I had an intense fear of vomiting in public all through my 20s pretty much and to be honest it creeps back in here and there. But in reality no one really cares if you're unwell in terms of it being a 'bad thing' to be ill. I always associate it with bad or being weak or something but the fact is we all are ill sometimes, your boyfriend definitely wouldn't break up with you over it! But you haven't got flu and pretty sure you won't get flu either, it's actually way less common to get than we're made to believe. So just go out and enjoy yourself x
i guess its because he's my new boyfriend i worry if i don't spend the weekend with him he might not want to be with me or be mad i can't hang out or find someone else. its definately me catastrophizing.
Thelegend27
04-04-19, 07:06
Fear of the flu is common, I don't personally pay much mind to it, I do however take precautions such as washing my hands, avoiding people I know have been sick, and trying not to visit any hospitals or doctor offices during flu season if possible, there's a lot of ways to avoiding the flu, some people are unlucky and get it anyway but you can lessen your chances greatly by following a few steps.
yeah it just sucks because i had to go to the doctor for an unrelated thing-had an ear infection, so couoldn't really avoid. i stayed about 10 feet away from anyone, but i know germs travel and he was coughing a lot.
nomorepanic
04-04-19, 16:44
If you catch it you catch it there is nothing you can do but thinking that your partner will then leave you because of it (and other similar issues) is a different issue that I think needs addressing with the therapist you are seeing as that sounds a bit like low self-esteem to me.
I know i am seeing my therapist about this, i'm just very nervous.
It'll be okay, promise. There's no saying you'll get flu, but even if you do, it won't be the end of the world.
I know i am seeing my therapist about this, i'm just very nervous.
What does your therapist think of your reassurance seeking and participation on the forum? Does he/she even know or has seen your post history?
Positive thoughts
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