UserName20
27-02-19, 00:25
Hi guys. Some of you may have read my other post about some issues I am having. Right now I really really do think something is wrong with me. I’m terrified and I’m so tired of feeling like this. I’ve been like this on and off since I was 14/15. I have good times and bad times. I just can’t beat this feeling. I wonder to myself how people can really enjoy life the way that they do. Disease can strike us any second. I feel like I am going to spend the rest of my life terrified and constantly in a state of worry. I don’t know what to do. How can I get married someday and have children and be happy? I am 19 years old now so it’s been about 4 years. Am I really just going to live in this constant state of worry? I have mentioned it to my doctor a few times, but I still am going to a pediatrician as he has known me my entire life and I can continue to go to him until I am 21. He doesn’t seem to take me seriously. I don’t think I’m good at explaining how I really feel. I put on a smile and nobody knows my mind and my struggles that I face every single day. Absolutely nobody. I feel so helpless. I feel like I’ll never be able to enjoy life. Everywhere we go there are just stories of cancer. My sister struggles with anxiety and is taking medicine to help her, however nobody would believe me if I told them I struggle with anxiety, just a different type. I miss when I was a child and didn’t know such things existed in the world.