View Full Version : Convinced Im goin mad
Hi everyone,
I am so glad i found this site. I have been having panic attacks for about 6 months now and it has turned into almost constant anxiety.
The worst and most scary bit is the depersonalisation. I feel like im in a dream most of the tima and when its really bad I convince myself that im either goin mad or about to float off into another dimension or something.
Im finding it difficult to leave the house at the moment. Its unbelievable that I was perfectly fine until a few months ago. I have refused medication from the doc. Im too scared to take it and dont think it will help anyway.
The doc has put it down to the fact that I had a premature baby 5 years ago who has only just recently been given the all clear. She was 13 weeks early and in intensive care for 3 months.
Im really hoping that the information on coping on this site will help.
Jude
Hi Jude, and welcome to the site
I have never really seriously suffered from depersonalisation myself, but I do know what it's like to think you're going mad, and it isn't very nice. I can assure you that this is not the case though, as many other people here will tell you also.
Sounds like you're going through a rough period at the minute though, it can be very hard at times when this is all relatively new to you and you haven't yet built up any effective methods of coping. People are probably getting sick of me telling them this by now, but I do believe that relaxation is important and needs to be kept up on a regular basis, helping to keep your general levels of anxiety down. Try not to avoid going out too much too, it may be difficult but it's important that it doesn't become a habit which becomes increasingly difficult to break as time goes on.
Hope you can find the help here that you need
mico
Ivor screwloose
17-01-05, 16:07
Hi jude,
I discovered this site last week, I have suffered anxiety all my life, and on many occasions I have been convinced I was going mad, but I'm not in a straight jacket yet, everyone here seems really nice and you will be getting plenty of advice and the support you need to get through this tricky patch,there are plenty of options available to you if you would rather not take medication just browse the site and ye shall find.
Kindest wishes
gary
gary
Hi Jude and welcome!
I have suffered with depersonalisation for many, many years and has always been the scariest of symptoms for me.
I always find it gets worse if I have extra stress and even now, after all this time, it still freaks me out [:I]
As you are finding it hard to leave the house at present, it may well be helpful to you to have a short course of medication just to enable you to stabilise yourself. Just a thought anyway!
love Kate x
nomorepanic
17-01-05, 17:59
Hi Jude
Welcome aboard. I am pleased you decided to post here and let us help you some more.
As well as the coping page from the website, have a good read of Meg's First Steps page - that is great too. (www.nomorepanic.co.uk/firststeps.htm)
I used to get the depersonalisation all the time as well and described as "not really living as me but looking down on someone else". It is scary but it does go in time. Reaxation and some good breathing exercises will help that.
I hope we can be of some help to you on here.
Nicola
Hi Jude,
I used to call it being in a goldfish bowl. Horrible experiences.
As Mico sazs - relaxation is incredibly important. Yoga was great for me as was relaxtion cd's.
It does pass as you learn to cope with feeling overwhelmed and not go into a downward spiral which ends in full on panic.
Meg
www.overcominganxiety.co.uk
You cannot conquer fear until you have learned what it is you're afraid of. The enemy is ignorance. Vivian Vance
Thank you for answering me. I was dreading no one wanting to know because they all thought I was mad too.
Its nice to know you are all out there, thinking Im sane. Hopefully I can start to believe it now too.[:P]
nomorepanic
17-01-05, 21:05
Jude
Trust me - you are not mad and we will all help all we can to get you back on track.
Nicola
Hi Jude
Welcome to the site.
You are not mad at all and i know we all think that with anxiety. Ive had bad day and cant sleep and am still convinced i am going mad although in reality i know it is anxiety.
Feeling isolated as when no one has been there is hard, but you know we all understand and will help you all we can.
You are not on your own.
Lots of Love Sal xxxxx
Hi Jude
Welcome to the site.
My first PA was june last year after that everthing went
out of the window eg my life I had 25 symptoms in all:(
one of them being depersonalisation:( thought I was
going mad and would be like this for the rest of my life.
[Yeah!]Then I found this site now I'm alot better some
days I'm 100% better:)
With alot of hard work support and time you to can learn
how to feel better.
Remember Jude you are not alone, we all know how you
are feeling and will help and support you.
There is light at the end of the tunnel it just takes time.
TAKE CARE
LOVE JILLXX
All problems have a begining and an end!
Hi Jude
Welcome to the site.
As others have said you are definitely not mad and what you are experiencing is something many people have as part of anxiety.
It does help to meet other people experiencing similar problem. I felt incredibly isolated before I found this site and it is such a relief to talk to people who understand.
You can get through this.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
hi and welcome , im sure you will find after reading through this site that most of us go through what you are and were not even remotely mad (only sometimes), the site is really helpful and will soon have you feeling better
fan x
Hi Jude
Welcome to the site you will find lots of help and support here, and believe me you are not going mad.
I had many,many symptoms at the start of my anxiety and like you did not want medication. I take St John's wort, vit B complex, vit C and omega 3 and gradually I have felt much better.
I used to find it difficult leaving the house but made myself do it, as staying in can turn into a habit and this thing was not going to beat me!
Relaxation and exercise are also important in beating this and you WILL get better I promise you.
You might not think it but there is light at the end of the tunnel.
Hope this helps.
Take care
Elaine x
Thanks everyone. I went to the supermarket today with my hubby. I actually managed to stay calm 90% of the time. Thats really good for me. Its all thanks to you all.
Jude
Hi Jude,
Thats excellent news.
We can only advise and support - you have to do it !
Keep doing something towards your progress everz day.
Meg
www.overcominganxiety.co.uk
You cannot conquer fear until you have learned what it is you're afraid of. The enemy is ignorance. Vivian Vance
Well done Jude.
Karen
It is not easy to find happiness in ourselves, and it is not possible to find it elsewhere.
Hi Jude,
[Wow!]You have done really well[^]
A big WELL DONE for going shopping.
Keep those positive thoughts going
you CAN do this Jade.
TAKE CARE
LOVE JILLXX
Confront your fears, list them, get to know them,
and only then will you be able to put them aside and move ahead.
nomorepanic
19-01-05, 18:57
Great news Jude.
Keep up the good work and go back again soon won't you?
Nicola
Well done Jude!
See you can do it, I made myself go to the supermarket but only used a little trolley as I couldn't bear being at the checkout any longer than I had to. After 6 months I managed a big trolley and boy did I feel good, some people may laugh at this but it was such an achievement, so keep taking these small steps and gradually they will get bigger and bigger.
Take care
Elaine x
I Can go out sometimes up the town but i hate supermarkets i panic as soon i as i go inn.
I tend to send my partner shopping.
I have always wondered how i cant go to a supermarket but i can go up the town to shops.
Hi Jude
Well done you going to the supermarket and managing okay.
Keep it up hon.
Lots of Love Sal xxxxx
hi jude i am new 2 this site and have just read yr story.Iknow how u feel when u say u feel u r going mad.I have suffered attacks for 25yrs now and i too thought i was alone.I became withdrawn and depressed i pushed away most of my friends cos i couldn't bear the thought of them seeing me in panic mode incase they thought i was mad too.I wouldnt go out unless it was absoultley necessary and even got too the point where i couldnt answer the phone.I needed help so i went to my GP who has been incredibly supportive and has put me on medication and relaxation classes.I still have a long way to go but my way of coping is think positive and think off this illness as a challenge that u can manage if not beat!You r not alone.
Kaz
kaz
Taylor,
Often its to do with the articficial strong lights in a big supermarket and that you hav eto queue longer than in a smaller shop .
But - you can do it. How about starting to put it on your 'to get over list ?
Meg
www.overcominganxiety.co.uk
You cannot conquer fear until you have learned what it is you're afraid of. The enemy is ignorance. Vivian Vance
Taylor,
I think the difference in a supermarket is that its so claustrophobic. I can just manage little quiet stores but not great big ones. I also feel better if I can see outdoors through a window.
The people, noise, lights, tall shelves etc is what I think does it.
Why dont you try a small store first and work up to a big one when you gain more confidence. Do you have a little kwik save or co-op by you.
Good luck
Jude
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