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Hi all
I feel really stupid saying this but my fear of spiders is scaring me.
Ive always had a normal fear of spiders but ive left them alone and thankfully they have done the same.
i recall being about 7 when i was sitting on the living room floor leaning against a wall and felt movement on my head, i remember screaming as my mom brushed a huge spider out of my hair. after that i never went anywhere near a spider but if i saw one i didnt let it bother me.
the problem is im now 26 and i run screaming at the sight of a spider and get myself into such a panic. my worst fear is finding one in my sleeping area and my worst nightmare came true a couple of years ago when a spider crawled directly above my bed and dropped onto the duvet i was under, i ran out of the room crying and slept on the sofa, i didnt sleep in the bedroom for days and it took huge courage to go change the sheets in there that this creature had touched.
i knew i was overreacting and feel it shouldnt have affected me as it did but i was litterally terrified.
last night i got into bed and was getting ready to to turn out the light when i saw a large spider on the duvet, i instantly flew into a panic and ran into my daughters room terrified. i was crying and rocking on the floor in the dark and an hour later i managed to move into my daughters bed. i got approx 1 hour of sleep and the rest of the time was spent worrying and panicing about what if i had not had seen it, what if it had crawled on my face or into my mouth, what if it had layed eggs in my ear (although i reasoned it was too big to fit in my ear - so i hope)
over the past 18 months i have slowly learned how to cope and face my panic attacks and they are quite a rarety now but this fear is bringing them on quick and fast and they are difficult to control. I want to be able to get in my bed tonight without fear but even thinking about going into that room brings on another attack. Have i got arachnophobia? is arachnophobia a real condition or am i just silly? Any advice anyone can give would be greatly appreciated
Many thanks
Zoe
Of Course arachnaphobia is a condition, its a very common phobia as i know myself.
Your not alone, and i wuold be the same, i hate spiders but unfortunatly i'm not quite so nice. if there is one in my room it gets squished, then i stay up for hours looking at the ceiling.
There was a film called arachnaphobia and one of them cralled into someones sleeping bag and bit them, now i don't camp as much.
I know that the panic comes quickly and its so fast you can't even think to say to yourself this is silly.
Maybe you should look into some hypno therapy like paul mckenna, i'd really like to get over my fear of spiders so i'm looking through lots of phobia books
hope you feel better and don't come across any spiders.
xxxxx
I have this to. I'm to scared to squish them myself. My eyes will constantly dart across the room if one is seen already. If any bug is seen in my room it takes a while for me to get back to sleep. At work one crawled on my desk I could stop shaking or sit down, fearing the would come out of my keyboard or phone...
I'm scared of spiders too. I hate that I am, but I always have been since my older brother used to use them to scare me when I was little :blush:. A couple of months ago I went to use the shower and there was a HUGE spider in there. I screamed my head off and ran out of the room. I spent like 30 minutes throwing things into the shower from the other side of the room to try and knock it into the plughole. I could seriously visualise it scrabbling out of the shower and coming after me, I had to stay near the door so that I could escape. Eventually I worked up the courage to get close enough to turn on the shower and kill it with hot water. Even then I couldn't bear to touch it, even with a stick or something. I had to wait for my flatmates to come home and get them to remove it from the shower (even dead it was too big to go down the 'gated' plughole). I don't really understand what it is that I find so terrifying about them - even the big ones are small compared to me, and in NZ they're not poisonous. It's just something about the way they look and move... I can't bear the thought of one touching me. And I hate being surprised by them, that's the worst.
For a phobia like this either NLP of EFT should work well. You ran leanr EFT free at www.emofree.com. For NLP try the book 'Get the Life you Want' by Richard Bandler.
Here's an NLP technique for treating phobias:
Imagine you're in a cinema watching a film of yourself on the screen freeze framed just before one of your phobic events.
Now move up out of yourself and back into the projection room, so you are watching yourself watching a video of yourself.
Drain all the colour and sound from the film of yourself.
Making sure that you stay watching yourself watching your self, start the black and white silent movie playing. It's important that you stay in the projection room throughout the film.
When you reach the end of the movie pause it. Move into this final frame so that you are looking through your own eyes. Add the colour back in.
Now that you are 'inside' your film looking through your own eyes rewind the film very fast in one or two seconds and add some circus or other silly music to it.
You should now find that when you think of the incident you are less scared about it.
yorkylover
17-09-08, 13:16
Im terrified of spiders.:scared15: :scared15: :scared15:
I cant even look at them on tv or in magazines.
Just the other day we took the dog's for there walk,and Buddy the newfoundland likes to push himself against bush's,when he came away from one this time he had a web all over his head and big speckled spider,(you know them ones that hang on bushes)I just went into panic mode,jumping about all over the place,I just hope no one saw me:roflmao: I screamed for my mum to get it of him.:scared15: :scared15: :ohmy: All the hairs came up on my arms and I was reaching.
It is a horrid phobia,its something about the legs!!!!!:scared15:
I too am so scared of spiders, I run a mile away from them, I get goosebumps when I think of them, yuk but luckily for me my eldest daughter is not scared at all and scoops them up in her bare hands no matter how big they are and puts them in the garden, I am so impressed and a little freaked with her. My son who is autistic carries them around in glass jars so imagine how I feel about that one! Not great for a person with a phobia of them.
lilly-lou
My mum is scared of mice! She has mice in her kitchen at the mo and when she comes down her stairs in the morning she says she starts to sing (tunelessly) at the top of the stairs till she gets to the bottom to scare them.
Then she said when she gets to the bottom she does a little dance on the bottom step stamping her feet, and then finally bangs on the kitchen door to make sure she has scared them off before she opens the kitchen door!
Its like a ritual every morning, she is 76!
She said one morning it didn't work and after all the singing and banging she opened the door and a mouse was sitting there just watching her!
Hi Zoe,
I hope that I can give you some hope with this message.
I'm a 35 year old male, and spent most of my life being terrified of spiders (especially the large, fast houses spiders that we get in the UK).
Last year, I saw three in the space of a week (one was a huge one in the shower room at the gym - I was such a nervous wreck!). Having seen 3 in a week left me feeling so traumatised and scared, constantly looking for spiders, and it even stopped me from going back to the gym, such was my fear! So I decided that I had had enough and wanted to try to do something about it.
So I contact the Friendly Spider Programme at London Zoo. They run one day friendly spider courses from April to October.
The course involves sharing your fears and experiences with other people who are scared of spiders. Then you have a talk with the zoologist, before you have group hypnotherapy. After the hypnotherapy, you go to the insectarium at London Zoo, and firstly look at spiders that are in their glass tanks (they cannot get out). Then you are encouraged to catch house spiders with the aid of a glass. I was able to do it!!!
After that, I didn't see any house spiders at home for months (I did the course last October). but then I did see one in May...it freaked me out and I ended up killing it...I felt so bad at killing it...
Anyway, a couple of weeks back, I was at my parents house. They had gone out and then I saw a largish house spider...I must admit that I initialy freaked out and even tried to kill it, but it survived...
So I reminded myself of what had been taught in the session at the Friendly Spider programme: feel that fear, and the fear will eventually subside (which it did) stamp your foot and the spider will stop (which it did), then place a glass over it (which I did) then slip some paper under the glass (which I did), the take it outside and release it (which I DID!!!!!). It was such an amazing, liberating feeling... before, I would never have got anywhere NEAR a spider of such size, but thanks to the therapy that I had, I WAS able to do it.
I just wanted to let you know that is is possible to find ways to help you cope with it... I'm not so cured that I want to go and buy a pet tarantula, but I am able to cope with them better now.
I'm not sure where in the UK you are, but if you are near to London, then consider checking out the Friendly Spider Programme. Details are on he London Zoo website. You will not be alone, as you will spend the afternoon with supportive staff, and also lots of other people who are also going through exactly what you are going through! Last year the course cost £110, which in my experience was worth it!
Take care -
Darren :-)
Wow. Thank you Darren, what a cool, positive post. The Friendly Spider Programme sounds like a great idea. Unfortunately I've just moved away from London, but maybe there is a zoo in NZ that offers something similar. I'd love to get ove my spider fear, I know it's irrational, and I don't hate spiders, I'm just scared of them. I always feel bad when I kill one. It's not the spider's fault that I'm scared of it. Darren, you've inspired me to try to do something about it - thanks!
Hi Leebee,
So glad that my post helped you out. :o)
If the zoos do not offer that in NZ, then maybe they can contact London Zoo to get information about their scheme and set up a similar thing there! :o)
Let us know how it goes! :o)
I thought I would also add a link to info about the London Zoo Friendly Spider Programme to this thread.
Do not worry, there are NO images of spiders on the page that you will be taken to. :)
http://www.zsl.org/zsl-london-zoo//news/scared-of-spiders,20,NS.html
Quiet-Lift
02-10-08, 04:31
Hi Zoe,
Like you, I still get the creepies when I see a large spider and this is that time of year when the buggers start taking up residence in your home and practise doing the 100 metres across the carpet just when you've managed to settle down.
I'm not as bad as I used to be and have found that putting a pint glass over them ( make sure you've drunk the beer first :)), rather than squishing, and then sliding a thin piece of card underneath before carrying out an eviction notice and dumping them outside, is a much better option when it come to accepting them. Darren's post gives some similar advice.
I'm grateful we don't live in Australia. You wouldn't be able to get a pint glass over some of the Monsters they have. And none of ours are poisonous. Maybe that's why all these Australians come to London?
Good luck. I know how irrationally terrifying it can be and I've regretfully killed many in my time...before I knew better.
That London Zoo Friendly Spider Course sounds like a great idea.:yesyes:
Best wishes
I sent a link to my local zoo about the Friendly Spider Programme in London... they said they thought it was a really good idea and would consider it... watch this space :).
That's excellent news LeeBee! I really hope that they do..I'm sure it will really help you!
I can't bear spiders either, especially the big black ones, its the sneakiness and speed - you don't know they're there until you catch a movement out of the corner of your eye - they never come at you face on or they lurk behind pillows and cushions ready to jump out the minute you start to relax!!! Luckily my husband is braver and can put them out. I can't let him kill them though because when I was little my Dad always said if you kill one then two come back and its stuck with me (how daft is that!!!). I can't even hoover up a dead one, the thought of it going up the tube past my hand brings me out in goose bumps! I'm going now as I'm getting really jumpy just thinking about them!
keepemlaughing
02-10-08, 17:47
That was excellent advice from Darren. Hopefully you will be able to do something similiar to face your fear of spiders.
Good luck!!
Blessings,
Sheryl
There used to be a Friendly Spider program in Bristol as well, run by Clifton Zoo.
I once had a tarantula on the palm of my hand. The guy who it belonged to said "don't start shaking or she'll bite you", which wasn't the right thing to say to me at that time. I didn't like it but I forced myself to do it. The same guy also owned snakes which I handled.
Tom
Rachey poos
03-10-08, 08:35
I am pathetic with this phobia I know.... but can't help it.... the other wk I had company at my house as it was my best ffreinds birthday and I did her a little doo. I was in the kitchen earlier that day mopping the floor when i saw this HUGE spider run across the floor... I cringed but thought oh it will go out the opened door...later on in the eve my freinds came to help me prepare the food and my freind asked me for an apron to protect her dress so I went to the back of the door picked up this apron and put it over her head..when i stood back I suddenly let out the most terrifying scream as on her chest was this bloody great big 8 legged bugga!!!! she looked down at it and said " oh is that all it is" at that she brushed the thing off her chest and the git come hurling towards me at about 100 mile an hr.......... no where to be seen........ so I went into utter panic... with in 0.6 seconds I was in my knickers and bra....jumping up and down shaking my hair shouting " Paul...help me...its in my hair ...its in my hair" Paul ( hubby) couldn't do anything for laughing...he was on his kness by now... i was doing the belly dance in me kitchen.... I didnt give a toss that i was almost naked with me 40 f boobs doing a dance in front of guests!!!! then Paul came over and kicked my skirt on the flloor..and there it was looking at me as if to say...." WHAT IS ALL THE COMOTION! Paul squished it which I was then crying about as I hate them but dont like killing them...its not their fault they are spiders....just stay away from me!!!!!!! hope this little story made you smile!!!
LOL - Fantastic story Rachey Poos.... it's just as funny as watcing my mum run (it's the ONLY time she get proper exercise!) when a wasp is flying around her when we are having a BBQ in the garden. lol
Best not read this if you're very frightened of spiders
I once had a tarantula on the palm of my hand. The guy who it belonged to said "don't start shaking or she'll bite you", which wasn't the right thing to say to me at that time. I didn't like it but I forced myself to do it. The same guy also owned snakes which I handled.
Tom
I'm probably borderline arachnophobic but I can cope with normal (house) spiders.
I'm sure your acquaintance meant well but I wonder about the "ethics" of handling tarantulas. Trouble is, they have no protection under their stomach and, since they're a lot heavier than house spiders, they're not going to float down if they're dropped and they can die if they fall badly.
That's my excuse for not picking one up anyway, :) but it also happens to be true.
I also read somewhere (in a book about them) that they don't like being picked up. They also usually give warning if they're going to bite by rearing up on their back legs and showing their teeth (I'd be out the door by then).
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