DenisD
11-04-19, 11:38
Hi everyone,
I know this topic has been discussed over and over again, but I feel the need of sharing my story, too.
Last year, around April, I found out that a friend of my sister in law lost her battle with lymphoma (she was 32 and it was the first time i’ve heard about this disease). At that time I was pregnant in 6 months and just before that I had discovered a nodule on my torso. I saw about 4 dermatologists and each of them said it’s either cyst, lipoma, dermatofibroma etc., a benign condition anyways. Having different diagnosis, I did a quick research on Google (worse idea ever) and the first result of nodules on skin is lymphoma. Bam, that was the moment I freaked out and was the trigger of my health anxiety. I read about other symphoms and I started experiencing generalized itching without rashes, joint & bone pains.
Months had passed with these symptoms and in July I went for a biopsy (I requested for it) which revealed the nodule was a dermatofibroma, so benign. I was revealed and my symtoms also dissapeared (I guess it was all in my mind). Until last November when I found a tiny lymph node in the posterior cervical area and I went crazy again. Started prodding it each and every day until finally found one on the other side, kind of symmetrical place.
I went for 2 ultrasounds till then (December and February), sizes of lymph nodes are 10x9 mm each and they don’t seem to increase. They have normal fatty hilium and are vascularized. Blood work is fine and haematologist said it’s most probably nothing and just keep an eye on them. I was supposed to do a 3rd US on March, only if I would not have touched the lymph nodes for a month... But as i poke them everyday, I haven’t scheduled an appointment yet.
Anyway, I also saw a psycologist in the meantime and things were better for a while, until 3 weeks ago when one of my friend’s sister died of lymphoma!! She was 24 :(.
Now I am in a very bad place, crying every day that I will leave my baby alone. I prodded so much that I even found my supraclavicular and axilar nodes, symmetrical as well.
Sometimes I know it’s just in my head and I am healthy, but right after I ask myself “what if it’s a slow growing lymphoma?”
I know the only way to calm down would be a biopsy but no one wants to do one since they are pretty small (under an inch).
I am sorry for this huge story but I just felt the need of writing it down.
I know this topic has been discussed over and over again, but I feel the need of sharing my story, too.
Last year, around April, I found out that a friend of my sister in law lost her battle with lymphoma (she was 32 and it was the first time i’ve heard about this disease). At that time I was pregnant in 6 months and just before that I had discovered a nodule on my torso. I saw about 4 dermatologists and each of them said it’s either cyst, lipoma, dermatofibroma etc., a benign condition anyways. Having different diagnosis, I did a quick research on Google (worse idea ever) and the first result of nodules on skin is lymphoma. Bam, that was the moment I freaked out and was the trigger of my health anxiety. I read about other symphoms and I started experiencing generalized itching without rashes, joint & bone pains.
Months had passed with these symptoms and in July I went for a biopsy (I requested for it) which revealed the nodule was a dermatofibroma, so benign. I was revealed and my symtoms also dissapeared (I guess it was all in my mind). Until last November when I found a tiny lymph node in the posterior cervical area and I went crazy again. Started prodding it each and every day until finally found one on the other side, kind of symmetrical place.
I went for 2 ultrasounds till then (December and February), sizes of lymph nodes are 10x9 mm each and they don’t seem to increase. They have normal fatty hilium and are vascularized. Blood work is fine and haematologist said it’s most probably nothing and just keep an eye on them. I was supposed to do a 3rd US on March, only if I would not have touched the lymph nodes for a month... But as i poke them everyday, I haven’t scheduled an appointment yet.
Anyway, I also saw a psycologist in the meantime and things were better for a while, until 3 weeks ago when one of my friend’s sister died of lymphoma!! She was 24 :(.
Now I am in a very bad place, crying every day that I will leave my baby alone. I prodded so much that I even found my supraclavicular and axilar nodes, symmetrical as well.
Sometimes I know it’s just in my head and I am healthy, but right after I ask myself “what if it’s a slow growing lymphoma?”
I know the only way to calm down would be a biopsy but no one wants to do one since they are pretty small (under an inch).
I am sorry for this huge story but I just felt the need of writing it down.