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View Full Version : The never ending cycle!



moe2187
16-04-19, 13:47
Hi everyone,

First time posting! I thought I would share my story as Ifeel reading other peoples stories help me understand that I am not alone andphysical symptoms of anxiety are real.

The pickle we have here is, am actually a Pharmacist. Ithink that contributes to many of my problems.
In 2008, I was quite stressed out with exams and I got hitwith a bad case of the cold. It started as a headache and literally the nextday, I had pins & needles in my fingers and toes. I had never experiencedthis so I was really scared. I thought it was MS, Brain Tumour, Lymphoma,Diabetes Neuropathy. I convinced myself I was so ill, I don’t know I gotthrough my 3rd year but I was literally ready to record videossaying goodbye to my family. From being active, I refused to play sports infear of aggravating whatever condition I had. Thankfully, the pins and needlesresolved after 2 weeks which I think was due to dehydration. However, theonslaught obsessing about little pains around my body convincing myself I havecancer. Additionally, I diagnosed myself with bone cancer and oral cancer. Ittook approx. 8 months from the point to get right and stabilise myself and Inever looked back.
In 2015, whilst I was playing football, my friend hadcollapsed and suffered a cardiac arrest, witnessing this for anyone would doenough to horrify them. Slowly but surely, but HA came back after many years inthe abyss. I would make regular A&E visits complaining of palpitations,pain in the chest which resolved and possibly due to a cold but then symptomsmanifested into headaches, fatigue and a sharp pain in my left hip. This occurredfor many months where I actually convinced myself I had a tumour on my leftkidney, so much so, I managed to get admitted into a 4-day stay at the hospitaland whilst they did an ultrasound, MRI, blood tests, couldn’t find anything!Once that reassurance was given, months of this sharp pain completelydisappeared. I was shocked at how powerful the mind can be.
Fast forward to 2017, when I was moving house, now with ason in my life, I was under a lot of stress working 80 hours a week. I startedgetting dizzy and blurred vision. This time, I dismissed it and didn’t panic,however over the last 18 months, it comes and goes and when its really bad, Istart to feel off-balance although I have not had a fall. This does no favoursfor my mood and now for the past 5 months, I have convinced myself ofMS/ALS/Parkinsons/Brain Tumour/Cardiac Problems, Cerebral Aneurysm, and aftergoogling my symptoms and reading about lymes, that’s now flavour of the month.Of course, after reading patient stories about how they experienced tinglingsensations, I developed that pretty much straight away. Am currently undergoingblood tests for lymes.
The overall cost of my last 2 bouts of HA has given me abill of £2800 on private tests and scans because I am do damn impatient. It’sso difficult to accept that anxiety can manifest into physical symptoms andmimic your very worst fears.

epistore
17-04-19, 17:07
Accurate, it never seems to end suffering