Excessive worrying over children and others

[Charlie1108]

Hi I’m just after someone rational to talk me down as I’m currently spiralling. My anxiety has been creeping back in slowly over the past few weeks but instead of being in just me, I’ve also been focusing on my family - partner and son at the moment. In the past week alone I’ve been convinced myself and my partner have melanomas and my son had Weils disease (had a virus with fever), brain tumour (asked what he was supposed to use to wash his hair) diabetes (drinking and seeing lots) and now, some deadly blood cancer. He’s had a mouth abscess then virus so not eaten properly in a couple of weeks. His appetite has only just returned but his lower eyelids don’t look as red as they usually do and his nail beds are pale. I feel so sick with worry and have even had my best friend send me pics of her kids eyelids. I’m so scared there is something wrong with him. He seems fine in every other way and as I said, has been getting over a virus. Please help [emoji20]


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[Scass]

Oh love I do feel your pain. I sometimes get nearly frantic when my partner or daughter are ill. It’s so hard when you aren’t in control of the situation.

Has something else set you off perhaps? Tiredness and anxiety seek to feed off each other, and if your son has been ill then you’re likely not getting a lot of rest.

Are you normally able to rationalise illness? Does your recent behaviour seem worse than usual?

Also, your son is getting over a virus, he’ll be better soon so keep that in mind.


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[Charlie1108]

Thank you for taking the time to reply.

I think it’s the being out of control that I can’t stand. My partner has crohns and doesn’t worry at all, just gets on with things. I, on the other hand am constantly analysing him and looking out for any flare up symptoms. It drives him batty.

I’ve not been sleeping well due to a few financial issues going on and not been getting on too well with partner and lack of sleep definitely exacerbates things.

I just hate projecting this crap onto my family. Only a few months back I took my toddler to the doctors as I was convinced she had enlarged lymph nodes on her skull (it was just her skull). I jut want to enjoy my children and not worry about every little thing x


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[travelgirl77]

This is my boogeyman as well. I could have written exactly what you said. I constantly worry that my children will get this very specific incurable brain tumor. I researched statistics, looked at sites from families whose child passed from this disease, looked up clinical trials, decided I would donate their brains, etc. It has been horrible. What has been worse is that I would constantly ask my kids how they felt, if their eyes were ok, if their heads hurt, etc. I would take them to the doctor for any pain. I posted on here and had so many people tell me that their parent did the same thing and they now have strained relationships with them. I do not want that at all. Those responses made me so upset that I vowed to just stop cold turkey. I have to distract myself when I feel the urge coming to ask them how they are or take a better look at their eyes or a flashlight to check them. I would just rather that if God forbid they get sick and pass that they have a fun, joyful but short life rather than live a long life of anxiety and fear and an overbearing fear mongering mom. Don't think I have this completely figured out, but you are in unfortunate company. Let me know if you have further questions.