View Full Version : About to get a lot of hassle at work
Will keep this short, because I'm in work right now and waiting for the, err, rubbish to hit the fan.
Basically, my job consists of managing the virtual learning environment at a local college. For the past year, we've been in the process of creating a new site for this, and for the past three or four months we've been warning staff that the move was imminent. The date for the move was given as last Friday. A week before that, I was still receiving panicked emails from people who hadn't prepared at all.
I was on holiday all the next (last) week, and I've come back to work to find out that the old site is now so unstable I've just had to make it inaccessible, although I and a few members of tech staff can still get in. Despite all the warnings I and my boss have given them, I know the teaching staff are still going to get really upset and most of this is going to come flying in my direction. I've made a lot of jokes about iron underwear, but I'm actually a really sensitive, anxious person and the thought of all the complaints and nastiness I'm going to get frightens the life out of me.
Thanks for reading, not sure what the point of this is other than to remind myself I'm not a bad person really and try to convince myself to stay strong.
You know where to send any complaints. Moaning swines :lac:
I think you'll find that when challenged, you're stronger than you think, especially as none of this is your fault.
May the Wrath be with you! :D
Thanks, KK. I know I can do this :)
Sounds like you could use the support of the "Told Ya So Gang". So if they complain you know what to tell them ;)
Positive thoughts
I hate confrontation but only when I feel I've done done something wrong, or can get blamed for something mainly .
youve done nothing wrong, keep that in mind all the time.
It sounds like you’re going to have some upset people, but.... you warned them and I’m sure there are help tools they can use?
I suggest writing an email template or/and script for yourself and using it for each person. Don’t be too apologetic or they’ll keep on and on and on. Stick to the facts in that you are sorry for any inconvenience but here’s what they need to do now.
You’ve got this, you’re brilliant with words and it may not be as bad as you think. But if it is, or it’s worse - you’ve still got this. It won’t last for ever. Deep calming breaths, one thing at a time & wine for dinner.
Also it’s very satisfying to make faces at people down the phone....
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MyNameIsTerry
04-06-19, 13:21
Look at the facts. They've had months of warning that you are migrating to the new site. Some of them failed to plan for it. That's their fault. If they get annoyed about it then that's an issue that can be taken back to their line managers for the incompetence. Any inability to conduct teaching will lie with them in this circumstance. They are ultimately responsible for the teaching to any students as they are stakeholders.
Some of them may have not understood or felt unable to approach you for help. This is understandable and you can obviously feel sympathetic and try to help them. But those that are just having a go because they feel inconvenienced by what is ultimately their own fault is something to flag up and for your manager to take back to theirs as it's unacceptable.
You can only do your best and these people may wants everything NOW NOW NOW because they are under pressure from above but there has to be compromise. They need to accept their role in causing any service delays to their clients/students. Stakeholders may kick off, it's what some do whether they are just idiots or pushing for a faster service (some of them may even be competing for your attention), but it's something to manage rather than everyone end up working 24/7.
What's the worst that can happen? Some of their students/clients are held up, maybe some complain and this heats up with the teachers. They may try to point the finger at your team and lay blame but is there any grounds for them to do so? Were they briefed adequately? Were they briefed in a way they could understand the importance of it without being intimidated by technical jargon? Were they given reminders of impending migration?
I've been involved in quite a few data migrations in a past role and there are always a ton of issues. We would spend possibly a year tidying up data to allow for migration and still have plenty to fix afterwards. And then there are all the errors testing misses (and often badly planned UAT scenarios e.g. where stakeholders aren't engaged about the differences between what happens in the real world vs the lab :winks:)...You just have to do your part, raise what you can and do what you can address issues. Stakeholders will want you to cancel everything to prioritise then and that's for managers to deal with so they don't find their staff burned out by unrealistic expectations.
So, I wonder whether this is anticipatory anxiety? I wonder if this is because you are one of those people who cares about their works, like to help others and is your own worse critic? I wonder what your manager thinks about the impending queries or maybe your co workers?
It's definitely anticipatory anxiety, yes. I'm an incorrigible people pleaser and while I've got better as I've grown older, I still feel physically sick at the thought of people feeling upset with me or feeling as though I'm not doing everything I can to help them.
I don't have any co-workers on this project, but my manager is of the definite opinion that if anybody gives me any hassle about this after all the emails, presentations, meetings and consultations we've given to ease the transition, they can get knotted.
Let me share with you a couple things that stuck with me in business/work. The first was in sales. It was the saying "Some will. Some won't. So what? NEXT!" It was a way of dealing with rejection but it applies to so many other aspects in life, one of which is taking advice. Everyone has been informed of the imminent change and has had time to prepare. You've done your part. There's nothing more you can do and the reality is, its not your fault if they haven't. So the reality is, some will be upset, some won't be upset, who cares? Move on to the next thing.
The other was when I was working in the car business for a short time. I quickly learned that all the nasty things you hear about the car business and car sales are true. I felt dirty to be honest. There was a salesman I made friends with and I asked him how he's dealt with that issue and he said "I just don't give a shit!" Here is one of the nicer people I met in my life but when it came to his living, he adopted that attitude and it not only served him well in making money, it helped him deal with the negativity that came with the job.
And yes, you have your manager. I would discuss this with him/her and how you want to handle what sounds like an inevitable backlash. I get that's not part of your personal makeup and its not part of mine either but I use those things as a coping and survival technique in the business/work world and they've served me well.
Positive thoughts
Thanks for the support, all. My manager has encouraged me to make up an email template to deal with any nastiness that comes through, but thus far, people have mostly been reasonable and I haven't had to use it. I've also been told to ignore any unreasonable requests. It's tiring and it's definitely making my anxiety flare, but aside from being a bit distracted I'm mostly coping.
One of the things I've learned over the years is that I don't always have to be at my best - sometimes it's okay to just be the best I can be at that point, as nauseating as that sounds ;) For now, I'm doing what I can with the resources I have - I can go back to being amazing again once circumstances are better.
MyNameIsTerry
04-06-19, 15:12
Good philosophy. I burned myself out trying to do it all and ended up on here! :doh: I used to be able to work all the hours but when I hit 30 I guess I couldn't keep up with that pace anymore.
Even if someone gets ratty it could be that they are under pressure, or maybe even feel a bit stupid for messing up, and a bit of talking things through (and them seeing you helping them) might smooth that over and turn their attitude around.
I was a Chief Steward in a union for a long time... I no longer am. What I tell new Union Stewards is the first thing they have to learn is how to tell their own people to go eff themselves...in a nice way of course. Stand your ground you gave fair warning. Tech changes in the workplace throw people into a tizzy but pretty soon it will just be the way it is and everything will be forgotten about how it used to be.
N.
Thanks, Noivous. It's been a tough week, I won't lie, and there's been times I've been close to having a little cry at my desk. That said, while certain staff members have behaved appallingly, I've received really heartening levels of kindness and support from others even when I haven't haven't had time to help them out in any sort of a timely manner.
I'm sorry to hear that you're having hassle at work! People seem to refuse to change sometimes...
(This is a very small thing compared to you, btw it sounds like you've done alot of hard work! That itself is amazing!)
In my work we were changing laundry day from Thursday to Tuesday, we have a company from outside the house come to pick up the clothing and wash it all. I put up notices and told each housing member (I work in a care home) about the change for week's. Reminders daily. They are older and some of them have memory issues- so I really tried to get the change into their minds. I even put a notice in each of their bedrooms on their notice board- the week of the change over I was on holidays....I was in a place where I couldn't have my phone on. I came out and a load of miss-calls. From the company, other workers and even some of the housing members- no a single person had put their washing out. There was ALOT of tears from me! It ruined my holiday tbh, I kept worrying and trying to fix things!
Sorry for that rant- I hope you're doing okay :flowers:. It isn't fair to be put into a position like that! By anyone
Thanks for all the kind comments.
Unfortunately, the pressure and verbal spite have been getting worse - I hardly dare pick the phone up or check my email, and I've had people wanting my time when I've been very visibly on my way to lunch, or indeed in the middle of it. Every day I find out about something else that should have been done but hasn't, and everybody thinks their problem can't wait a second despite having already waited several months.
I'm trying my hardest, but my depression has staged a return and it's not much fun. I'm permanently exhausted and shaky, and the insomnia and bowel symptoms have returned; when I tried to plan something fun to do this evening I realised that nothing seemed particularly enjoyable any more. I have a ton of stuff to do for upcoming craft fairs and the online game I help staff, and all I can think about is how much I want to crawl beneath the covers and stay there.
Sorry for whining; I know this will lift in time but at times like these I always get so angry with myself for not being resilient enough to simply snap myself out of it.
Oh Blue that’s such a shame. People really can be bast***s sometimes. Can you speak to your boss? I’m sure they understand on some level but maybe not how deeply it’s affecting you?
Keep to your plans at work, stick to your guns, take your blooming lunch break, and remember that this shall pass x
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MyNameIsTerry
13-06-19, 22:38
It sounds like it's time to set up a priorities list. Everything that needs to be done gets assessed and assigned it's place in the queue. If stakeholders become unreasonable about this then their bosses can be called in to talk about how they are not considering how the world doesn't revolve around them.
Are regular fix updates being sent out? What is in the pipeline, when it's expected, etc? If stakeholders are kept in the loop (some) may push less. You will always gets the selfish ones though. They have people on their backs so they will try their luck.
As far as lunch goes, just tell them to email it through or give you a call after x minutes.
Updates were sent out, yes, along with clear lists of actions that the staff concerned needed to take. They didn't take these, with the result that we're now in a very precarious position. I'm firefighting at the moment, dealing with the quickest fixes first, then everything else on a more or less first come first served basis. The awkward buggers tend to get shunted to the back of the queue, primarily because these are the ones who've done least to help themselves.
On the bright side, I removed all the internal advertising banners on the old (dying) site and replaced it with an appropriately-modified copy of Monty Python's dead parrot sketch, which has actually proved more effective than all the meetings, presentations and informational emails combined.
We can be our own worst critic, and at times, enemy. So bear in mind that you have coped thus far and will continue to do so, whatever is thrown your way ;)
PS - You can't beat British humour to create positive vibes :shades:
I hope you can get some respite from all this over the weekend and that you can sleep and stay asleep. Don't jeopardise your hard earned mental health over this, Iris? Someone else will deal with this if you go under so remember that and prioritise your sanity and wellbeing because you don't want to become really ill over other people's mistakes xx
MyNameIsTerry
15-06-19, 01:47
Updates were sent out, yes, along with clear lists of actions that the staff concerned needed to take. They didn't take these, with the result that we're now in a very precarious position. I'm firefighting at the moment, dealing with the quickest fixes first, then everything else on a more or less first come first served basis. The awkward buggers tend to get shunted to the back of the queue, primarily because these are the ones who've done least to help themselves.
On the bright side, I removed all the internal advertising banners on the old (dying) site and replaced it with an appropriately-modified copy of Monty Python's dead parrot sketch, which has actually proved more effective than all the meetings, presentations and informational emails combined.
Do you mean updates about implementation of the new site? I'm asking about updates on fixes post implementation. If they have an issue with those then they need to contact the owner of that project and argue their case. I assume this is you. But if you, and your boss, sit down and order this stuff based on the impacts to stakeholders they will have to live with it. If they still push, you can push back at their bosses. Your boss may like to point out why his staff are now in this difficult position and that whilst you are all working hard to rectify it should someone more senior come asking why services are failing it will be pointed out where blame lies. That tends to get managers to be more patient.
Some stakeholders will run you into the ground simply because they want to look good themselves. The credit seldom gets pointed to those who did that work. And these types of stakeholders tend to want it again next time.
Terry, we're waiting for a consultant to come in to fix the back end stuff, which is way outside my purview. I'm letting people know this every time I ask, and letting them know what I'm doing to protect their data in the meantime. I give timeframes for this, too, although sometimes they're fairly approximate. Where people are particularly obnoxious or I've caught them lying in the past, I communicate directly with their managers.
Feeling a little better now; apparently the depression hasn't completely taken root. Would love to have the weekend off from everything, but I have a largish craft fair today and a bit of writing to catch up on for the gaming site tomorrow. Still, I'm planning to make sure it's a fairly relaxed one.
Good luck today as you start another working week...I really hope things get better, Iris x
Thanks so much, Pulisa. I'm not sure why, but putting a bit of Monty Python up prominently in a place where everybody can see it has largely stopped the hassle in its tracks. I have no clue - maybe laughter really is healing. How are you doing, anyhow?
There's nothing like humour to diffuse challenging situations..Am glad Monty P is working some magic..Hope today was less stressful for you.
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