View Full Version : Another lump. Extremely scared!!!!
Miles Silverfish
13-07-19, 01:21
I found a lump on my right Achilles tendon last night. I'm scared it's related to that place behind my ear on my left side. This is all driving me mad. My tendon/ankle really really hurts too. I did twist that ankle last week. And. I limped like crazy around the store on it after that for about an hour.
Still. I'm concerned that I could have the "c" word and mets.
FML. This sucks.
Ya'll think that lump is just there because I twisted my ankle?
I found a lump on my right Achilles tendon last night. I'm scared it's related to that place behind my ear on my left side. This is all driving me mad. My tendon/ankle really really hurts too. I did twist that ankle last week. And. I limped like crazy around the store on it after that for about an hour.
Still. I'm concerned that I could have the "c" word and mets.
FML. This sucks.
Ya'll think that lump is just there because I twisted my ankle?
Hey Miles - it's quite possible that the lump could be there because of your twisting of your ankle. Especially if you limped on it for a good hour, that probably made it flare up.
Forgive me for not knowing this, but what is this all about behind your ear? Is there a lump that you found there too?
Miles Silverfish
13-07-19, 04:00
It's a lump right behind my left ear that has been there since January or February. I have had countless doctors look at it and they all just think it's a benign growth.
The last doctor I went to said
in this order what she believes it is.
1) cyst wall
2) lipoma
3) Lymph node.
but, I cannot stop worrying about soft tissue sarcoma cancer. I see the doctor and then a few days later I go back to thinking I'm dying.
It's a lump right behind my left ear that has been there since January or February. I have had countless doctors look at it and they all just think it's a benign growth.
The last doctor I went to said
in this order what she believes it is.
1) cyst wall
2) lipoma
3) Lymph node.
but, I cannot stop worrying about soft tissue sarcoma cancer. I see the doctor and then a few days later I go back to thinking I'm dying.
I understand now, gotcha.
As a fellow anxiety sufferer, I have learned that we must trust our doctor's word in order to get over this case of anxiety that we are battling. There's no point in doubting the people that went to school for medical purposes. They say we know our own bodies better than they do, but sometimes, that's not the case. They'll know more.
If they say it is a benign growth, then you must accept their word for it in order to begin your recovery.
Speaking of recovery, have you seen a therapist or are you on any medication?
Miles Silverfish
13-07-19, 04:40
I'm on citalipram. Also saw a therapist. But, it still don't help. I feel so damn alone in this whole thing. More alone than I have ever felt in my life. I mean. They can talk to me. But, they don't know how it feels to have HA. Or, what it feels like to be so afraid for your life and wellbeing.
I'm on citalipram. Also saw a therapist. But, it still don't help. I feel so damn alone in this whole thing. More alone than I have ever felt in my life. I mean. They can talk to me. But, they don't know how it feels to have HA. Or, what it feels like to be so afraid for your life and wellbeing.
Good to know, thanks for informing me of that.
I can tell you that you are definitely not alone in this. I understand the struggles and I know what it feels like to have this anxiety.
Even though they may not have gone through health anxiety or know what it feels like, they are trained to understand it and work with it. That's why they are there in that position.
Keep your head up Miles. You have a life to live ahead of you. Don't fear what you know can't be true, especially this thought of having the "c word".
I know it's tough, Miles, but you need to try and stop focusing on the terror, and start bringing your attention back to the recovery process.
Miles Silverfish
13-07-19, 23:46
Thanks guys.
I went to the ER. They X Rayed my foot. It's a pretty bad sprain. They wrapped it up. But, it's still hard to walk. Meh. Could have been a lot worse news today. So thank God it's just a sprain. Yay for slippery grocery store floors. LOL.
The thing on my head feels fluid filled to them. The PA still wanted me to get a biopsy. But, she explained to me that it's a very very slim chance it's cancer and she doesn't think it is. She thinks it's more of a cyst or lipoma type thing.
Had a feeling it was going to be a sprain, didn’t think it was my place to try and diagnose you, but it sounded like it based on what you were saying. Glad they took care of it.
Sounds like you’re getting some answers on the thing on your head too, which is also good. Finally put your mind at ease as to what it is
Miles Silverfish
17-07-19, 19:56
It's stupid I know. But. Now once again I am freaking out I have soft tissue sarcoma and mets of it.
It's too hard for me to just believe my ankle is sprained. It feels like their is pressure on my Achilles' tendon. Like a tumor is on it. And, the bump is still there.
I cannot stop thinking I am dying.
I get a biopsy on this place behind my ear tomorrow and I'm so afraid of what the results are gonna be that I feel like hurting myself.
It's stupid I know. But. Now once again I am freaking out I have soft tissue sarcoma and mets of it.
It's too hard for me to just believe my ankle is sprained. It feels like their is pressure on my Achilles' tendon. Like a tumor is on it. And, the bump is still there.
I cannot stop thinking I am dying.
I get a biopsy on this place behind my ear tomorrow and I'm so afraid of what the results are gonna be that I feel like hurting myself.
If you're having serious and / or overwhelming thoughts of harming yourself, or anyone else, please seek professional help immediately. Call your doc, see a therapist, or go to the ER. Your anxiety is spiraling, and you just need to try and get it under control. It takes time, patience, and lots and lots of practice. A therapist and medication will not magically cure your anxiety. The medication can help take the edge off, and the therapist gives you the tools you need to (not all inclusive) 1) identify triggers, 2) identify the anxious behaviors and thoughts "in the moment", and 3) alter your behavior to more appropriately deal with those thoughts.
But if you're a danger to yourself or anyone else, you shouldn't wait to seek help.
Miles Silverfish
18-07-19, 07:11
So. I went to the ER again tonight. Got a CT scan finally. Shotty lymph node. Non cancerous.
Good to hear! So, time to start working on your anxiety.
Miles Silverfish
12-08-19, 07:50
I never updated about the bump behind my ear. I had a CT scan. It is a lymph node. I go the ENT Wednesday. Scared.
The node has never gotten any bigger though. But, it feels rubbery and bouncy which bothers me. But the ER doc said it didn't look like cancer. Still got to go the ENT to get my anxiety to go away though.
Miles Silverfish
18-08-19, 00:25
The ENT looked at it and looked at my CT scan again and believes it's just a cyst. I'm still worried about sarcoma though. I can't stop worrying about it.
I get thismthing out snd and biopsied on September 26th. Have to be put under to do it. Never been, so I am afraid. Wish me luck.
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