Hopefulmi
23-07-19, 07:54
Hi all,
I haven’t used this board before, I’ve usually been on the health anxiety one. I’ve been off citalopram for 2 years now and done well but just got hit like a tonne of bricks this week.
I have 2 boys, age 6 and 3. The big one is 7 in September and just finished year 1 and the littlest has a year to do in nursery. Since they finished, I’ve been non-stop crying....I’m so hung up on all the last times. My toddler soon won’t be a toddler....when will be the last time I hold him as he sleeps or that I pick him up? Will the big one still need me, want to play with me? When will he stop believing in magic, when will he stop holding my hand etc.
I know none of us are guaranteed tomorrow and I’m lucky to have these boys....I know that, we lost our first child to a genetic condition when she was only 2 days old. I know that my almost 7 year old has years of still wanting to play and the 3 year old even more so (he’s not 4 til March) but rationalising isn’t working. I started on citalopram again last night after speaking to my GP.
I just feel so alone and I know this is a natural feeling for parents but I can’t control it. I was fine with my big boy playing out with his friends before and seeing us later but all of a sudden, I can’t deal. I remember being his world and best friend and I know I still am but he needs independence too. I am still the world to the little one and will be for the foreseeable future.
Anyway, that’s me. Thanks for reading.
Naomi
I haven’t used this board before, I’ve usually been on the health anxiety one. I’ve been off citalopram for 2 years now and done well but just got hit like a tonne of bricks this week.
I have 2 boys, age 6 and 3. The big one is 7 in September and just finished year 1 and the littlest has a year to do in nursery. Since they finished, I’ve been non-stop crying....I’m so hung up on all the last times. My toddler soon won’t be a toddler....when will be the last time I hold him as he sleeps or that I pick him up? Will the big one still need me, want to play with me? When will he stop believing in magic, when will he stop holding my hand etc.
I know none of us are guaranteed tomorrow and I’m lucky to have these boys....I know that, we lost our first child to a genetic condition when she was only 2 days old. I know that my almost 7 year old has years of still wanting to play and the 3 year old even more so (he’s not 4 til March) but rationalising isn’t working. I started on citalopram again last night after speaking to my GP.
I just feel so alone and I know this is a natural feeling for parents but I can’t control it. I was fine with my big boy playing out with his friends before and seeing us later but all of a sudden, I can’t deal. I remember being his world and best friend and I know I still am but he needs independence too. I am still the world to the little one and will be for the foreseeable future.
Anyway, that’s me. Thanks for reading.
Naomi