View Full Version : People with fear of flying or boats?
Has anybody here got these fears and been able to overcome them or not overcome them? For me the boat would be my biggest anxiety then long haul then short haul flights. I have flew a few times in past few years but I don’t want to fly until next year earliest now.
I am unsure if I can beat it I mean if I hate planes you can go to Ireland and NYC by boat but I fear this would be worse as you can’t get off for hours or in some cases all week. I have many fears like what to eat, exercise on a boat, heights sea sickness, the water..anybody here been on a cruise?
Also I have a fear of going in bus coaches on the motorway but I did manage to get on one and over come this fear the other day.
nomorepanic
30-07-19, 23:11
Phil- I honestly believe you need to get on top of the OCD first and foremost and then tackle these issues later. If you don't treat the MAIN problem then you can't possibly treat all the others.
Phil- I honestly believe you need to get on top of the OCD first and foremost and then tackle these issues later. If you don't treat the MAIN problem then you can't possibly treat all the others.
That is true but I can still enjoy a holiday whilst recovering from ocd. Besides I may never fully get over the ocd so have to continue as normal
I say do the travel if you can! Don't get me wrong it's not easy, but definitely doable so don't feel defeated. I just flew to Spain for a wedding. I hate flying, like really bad. I was physically sick the morning of our flight. I hate the airport crowds and the general hustle of it all. I didn't end up attending the wedding cos of my sickness phobia and having a bad day with it. But, I did manage to have a really good few days in hindsight relaxing by the pool with my bf and getting some sun. You're right, we may never overcome our problems entirely, so learning ways to manage it whilst you're away or travelling is key so that we don't miss out. X
MyNameIsTerry
31-07-19, 02:05
Phil,
I agree, if you can do things then it would be considered better to try them. The opposite is avoidance and shrinking inwards which any therapist will say isn't the way to go.
However, anxiety tends to overlap into other areas and it becomes a big mash up of nastiness. You have to learn to pick your battles with it and prioritise. Therefore you could try to tackle your travelling anxiety, but also work on your contamination/perfection issues, as you rightly say this could always stop you travelling for years but what you also need to do is accept these are areas that need to be tackled in a structural way and we have given advise on how to tackle them all.
I use to be afraid of flying up till a year ago where i finally said i had enough of riding in a car for 8 hours to Florida and decided to take the dive on flying and i came out of it feeling like i was ''That was what i was afraid of? really?'' Now the idea of flying for long periods of time is a whole new battle.
Phil,
I agree, if you can do things then it would be considered better to try them. The opposite is avoidance and shrinking inwards which any therapist will say isn't the way to go.
However, anxiety tends to overlap into other areas and it becomes a big mash up of nastiness. You have to learn to pick your battles with it and prioritise. Therefore you could try to tackle your travelling anxiety, but also work on your contamination/perfection issues, as you rightly say this could always stop you travelling for years but what you also need to do is accept these are areas that need to be tackled in a structural way and we have given advise on how to tackle them all.
I think my whole life I have been fussy when I fly. Some days I just go stuff it I will go and I end up going.
Course I get great places by train but I feel guilty about the time and cost of it. If Ireland could be reached by train I would go twice per year but sadly it takes me a lot of effort just to get the courage to go and book a flight.
What's more expensive? Holidays and traveling or real life professional help? Just curious :huh:
Positive thoughts
What's more expensive? Holidays and traveling or real life professional help? Just curious :huh:
Positive thoughts
Yes but the professional has to work. Now I stopped therapy if I do go back I believe I should try someone new in future
Yes, I've also had therapists who I didn't gel with, it's important to find someone you feel you can work with. And even still, professional help is great - but it doesn't just fix us. There's a lot of advice on here now just saying 'yeah but get help for your anxiety' etc, which is true and it does help hugely. However, I've had many many courses of professional help over my life and I'm still on forums, still having problems, so it's a little naive of people to just assume professional help will fix everything. It's usually still a battle, even if we overcome the worst of it anxiety will always be there, it's in our make up. So, it is really important in my opinion to find coping mechanisms that work for you. Even if that does mean spending more to get places to be honest! At least you're getting there which is brilliant. After my last flight and the whole holiday thing I've realised it's just something I will always struggle with. It is worth all of the worry, feeling ill and panicking? Not really. So in future I will be looking to travel by different means, as that works for me and will allow me to enjoy the time I'm away rather than freaking about planes airports and all the rest of it. There's no right or wrong, we just need to find our groove so we don't miss out on the things we want to do :)
Flying really scared me! Until this year I had never been in a plane because I would have nightmares about planes being a giant death tin - this weekend I’m going on my 9th plane this year!! [emoji23][emoji85]
I’ve missed out on so much because I would always decline any opportunity to get off this little island. While I don’t actually enjoy flying, the weird accomplished feeling [emoji23] you get when you land and the excitement that you’re in a new place is worth the few hours in the scary tin.
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Dying_Swan
20-08-19, 13:55
Flying really scared me! Until this year I had never been in a plane because I would have nightmares about planes being a giant death tin - this weekend I’m going on my 9th plane this year!!
Now that is impressive. Well done! I'm not a fan of flying but still do it from time to time. Enjoy your trip!
DustingMyselfOff
20-08-19, 20:56
Maybe try a hypnotherapist? I've seen one now three times and I am miraculously cured of my panic attacks as soon as I get on a highway, and my cross-country flight a few days ago was actually ENJOYABLE, rather than the terrifying, illness-inducing task it used to be.
Sue
With the Coronavirus at the moment perhaps it’s a good time to fly for me? Half empty planes perhaps low prices and if I feel anxious not many people around to see me feeling anxious?
brucealmighty
02-03-20, 17:11
Flying is the safest form of transport statistically. I work in aviation and you'd be amazed what those things can get through. I personally don't like long flights but that's just me.
With the Coronavirus at the moment perhaps it’s a good time to fly for me? Half empty planes perhaps low prices and if I feel anxious not many people around to see me feeling anxious?
Except Phil you've said in other threads that you are terrified of going places, even in Europe incase you catch the virus and have been talking about how you cancel your holiday - infact you were talking of hiding away in your house for months only earlier today. So, this all seems a bit contradictory ?
As for flying itself, as a long-term 'terrified of flying person' I feel I've got over it a good deal with two flights in the last 12 months. It can be done. Statistically flying is actually safer than being on the ground and living normal life.
glassgirlw
02-03-20, 18:22
I’m probably a bad person to ask about flying lol. I absolutely hate it. I’ve flown many times, every time is an anxiety inducer for me. And I also won’t take drugs, so all my family is always telling me they’re going to slip me Xanax or something which if I found out about, would send me into anxiety attack too.
I don’t know why I hate flying. If it’s a lack of control thing, a heights thing, a fear of crashing thing, Or some of all. Regardless, I won’t voluntarily fly. The times I have, have been for work and driving wasn’t an option. I’d love to be able to get over this fear because I do love traveling. And having to waste 2-4 days of my vacation time due to driving does suck.
I think I’d love a cruise though. I love being on the water.
The issue is I decide to go > become very stressed and worried > delay going and it goes round in a circle. Not much anybody can say will be of use until someone can help break that cycle? It goes for boats, planes and learning to drive. I go through the choice of making that choice to do it and bottle it? Any advice would be great
It’s not up to someone else to break the cycle, it’s up to you. That’s my advice.
Not much anybody can say will be of use until someone can help break that cycle?
That person is YOU
It’s not up to someone else to break the cycle, it’s up to you. That’s my advice.
True but what’s the right thing to do? I’ve had mixed advice in the past some day go ahead book it or drive some say if it makes you anxious don’t do it. It’s a bit confusing the issue I have is “anxiety” and I accept I need to change my thought pattern
That person is YOU
I know I CAN do something but I have an anxiety “wall” or safety blanket. I bailed out on flying, relearning to drive, college in the past six months due to the anxiety.
I doubt my ability to do it. I did get over some of my social media anxiety but it was difficult. I may be able to do these things but it has to feel “just right”. I opted to not fly for 4 years and I go through spells like this.
I bet there’s some great YouTube videos that can help.
jalapeno1234
03-03-20, 22:33
I have never stepped foot out of the uk in my 27 years due to the captivity that is emetophobia. My stomach hasnt thrown up in almost 20 years and though an achievement it is what holds me back from even going to Ireland (Im in England.) I went to Northern ireland in 2017 just two years after I was hospitalized for emetophobia and starving myself and when I look back I realise how far I came...I even ate a huge pizza before and was very edgy and jittery on the flight but did it without anyone suspecting an ounce of anxiety - you can do it but Id try with very short haul, if I plan to go again I may consider france or italy, 2 hours max. My friend who has crippling travel anxiety told me one efficient way is alcohol but I feel the risk there is feeling more out of control. I agree with the above, theres some fantastic podcasts on spotify and youtube x
I feel the need to jump on this thread.
Hi folks, i had a fear of getting on a plane, train etc for 18 years.
Let me explain, i was terribly agoraphobic and couldn't even go in a corner shop at one point as i was so bad. And then i went on a fearless flyer course in Manchester, bought for me by my hubby as a christmas present..... You can imagine my horror:scared15:
Anyway, let me cut this story short, I did the course, I got on the plane and have flown to spain and turkey on holiday since.
It was the best thing I have ever done, well apart from having my blonde locks shaved off for charity that is.
Feel the fear and do it anyway....
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