When to seek a second opinion or go private?

[Bootles]

I'm very torn and emotional atm. I am currently on a waiting list for cbt and have been given sertaline so I am getting help for my HA but this is A separate issue

Concerned I have cervical or a gyno cancer....maybe bowel.


5 weeks ago I experienced worrying lady symptoms that happened sexually and when going to the loo. There are details in my first ever post on this forum. Since finishing my period on the 15th I have had no symptoms but I am taking stool softners and i haven't been sexually active in any way due to stress. So a part me is unsure if my symptoms are now hiding.

I have been the gp twice:

First was a experienced older locum doc lady who examined me visually and physically down there (speculum and bimanual). Seemed happy but blamed stress and referred me for cbt. I had one symptom at this point.she was very nice. Appt was over 20 min.

Second visit was one of the main stay GPS who was also an experienced older lady who specialises in family planning and is a trainer in that area. Listened to my symptoms gave me another exam physically and visually said all was normal but said there was discharge so swabbed me. Also physically examined my rectum and tummy. She seemed to not be listening to all my worries. Prescribed my sertaline and seemed to say if it continues we need to maybe change your contraception.this appointment was over 20 min.


Both of these appts were made after a phone consultation with another younger gp who didn't seemed worried either time. She said my first examination and no pain was a good sign and said I'd had 3 clear smears and suggested i book the second appmt if I wanted to and even mentioned ' resurrance ' at one point. She was impatient due to being on the phone consultation. I had new incidents between the appts but by the time I had the second one I was a week clear.


I feel like I have been fobbed off because of my HA and I've read so many bowel n cervical cancer misdiagnosed stories and lots of GPS missing cancer statistics. I've even read that a single gp will diagnose 8-10 cancers per year out of 6000 appointments....seems a lot! My hubby n dad seem to be happy im I don't have cancer and my dad has decades of experience working as a cancer technician on a gynocolgy ward but is now retired. He has seen many patients!


Should I go private? I have holiday fund I can use. I'm wondering whether to push for tests with my go but I know wat the wait is like.

[BlueIris]

Given how thorough you've been, I really wouldn't waste your money. Health anxiety distorts your perceptions, and based on what I've seen on here there's a very real chance that a private consultation won't set your mind at ease.

[Bootles]

Thanks for replying,

I feel like I need more tests rather than another doc as other women in my position seem to have had them. I am worried I have not.

The second doc said no when I asked about an ultrasound or coloscopy. The first doctor said I could have an ultrasound wen I asked but she didn't want me to get into testing habits.

I'm not rich but I just feel I might regret it if I don't have tests.

I find it interesting you feel I have been thorough when I feel I have not been pushy enough.

[BlueIris]

Testing can be a slippery slope for people with health anxiety; I've seen it time and time again that people receive test after test and it never sets their mind at ease.

From what you've said, even if this isn't the case for you, it's a very real risk.

Personally, if two GPs told me I was okay I'd be rejoicing and getting on with living with whatever my body was feeling.

[lofwyr]

Can doctors be wrong? They are human, so of course it is a possibility.

With that said, in my decades of on again off again HA, I have doubted doctors countless times. Even more recently, my dermatologist told me a suspicious looking lesion was a small cyst and would resolve itself. I had my doubts. It looked bad to me. He was right, but I put in a solid three weeks of worry about it, wondering why he wouldn't biopsy something so suspicious. It was because he knew what he was talking about. I am learning to trust them more, to accept that it is not in their best interest to send me out the door sick and dying.

They see patients every day who have serious maladies. Your GPs have probably diagnosed many cases of the diseases you are worried about. Have some faith in that experience, it weighs a lot more than our fears.

[Bootles]

I definitely do see the merit in what you are both saying....

I think a huge part of my HA is the uncertainty and what if. Before I got my lady symptoms I had made real progress with my skin cancer fears. My ha has been on and off for 17 years and has been mainly melanoma based but also kidney worries and such. Also things like not getting an eye test and not wanting to be pregnant because of the what ifs.

This is my first active symptom H A.

What if plays on my mind all the time. I would pay anything to stop that feeling.

[BlueIris]

You're not stopping it by seeking further reassurance, though, you're only postponing it.

Is this something you can understand?

[Bootles]

You mean if I say...went to a private gynocologist the reassurance would be short lived and I would still worry and worry longer rather than accepting medical opinion right now and dealing with it?

[BlueIris]

I think it's a distinct possibility if not an actual probability, yes.

[Fishmanpa]

There was a member here that had a mind boggling obsession with his nodes and thought he had lymphoma.... for years! He saw at least a dozen doctors and specialists had dozens more tests yet nothing reassured him. He finally found a doctor that did an invasive surgical biopsy of a node in his groin that had become shotty from all the poking and prodding. Of course, it was negative. HE STILL DIDN'T BELIEVE IT!

Mind you, that's an extreme case but it illustrates the slippery slope of reassurance seeking. There are examples of this all over the boards.... thinking you still have cancer despite medical testing and moving from one serious illness to the next etc. The key is in addressing the faulty mindset and subsequent reassurance seeking behaviors.

Positive thoughts

[Bootles]

I research a lot on personal stories of ppl who have cancer that I think they have and I read too many newspaper horror stories of misdiagnosed people with cancet.

I also read lots of statistics of cancer and accuracy of smear reports. I have also read over 50 papers on the cancers i think I have and case studies.

I think I am going to be one of the unlucky few that gets diagnosed with cancer far too late. My mum passed from a rare cancer when I was 21. Docs seemed confident until her liver scan. She was never misdiagnosed but her gp said things like gallstones etc originally.

[BlueIris]

Hearing about your mum offers a lot of context.

However, you never hear about the thousands upon thousands of people who don't have cancer.

[Bootles]

That is true. If the results are true that only 8-10 ( add on a few for misdiagnosed) visits to a gp per year lead to new cancer diagnoses out of 6000 it makes you wonder what the other 5990 are.

[lofwyr]

That is true. If the results are true that only 8-10 ( add on a few for misdiagnosed) visits to a gp per year lead to new cancer diagnoses out of 6000 it makes you wonder what the other 5990 are.

Often times it is a virus, etc. Even more often it is anxiety. GPs in my health system ask a lot of questions about anxiety as a part of standard screening now. Anxiety causes a lot of symptoms, and it seems younger doctors are becoming more aware of the effect of Dr. Google, and anxiety in general.

[Bootles]

Thanks for the replies again.

My mum's cancer has always made me feel unlucky. She was a worrier too.

I sometimes think I know way too much. My parents were both in the medical field so I was always surrounded by documents and phone conversations around things (my dad worked in a cancer hospital and my mum was a midwife) including their discussions around medical shows....I knew way too many things medically by the time I got to school. Before Google I used to read their books.


I can't shake the feeling I'm going to be one of those people in (insert UK newspaper) who is dying because their cancer was missed.

[BlueIris]

You need to stop reading these stories. All they do is grow the association in your mind that these things happen routinely, when they're actually vanishingly rare.

[Fishmanpa]

The only times I sought a second opinion was with my cancer diagnosis and that was because I wasn't feeling comfortable being treated locally. We traveled two hours to Johns Hopkins (top 10 in the US) and I'm glad we did!

The other time was when my wife got sick. She was in the same hospital system I initially was with my cancer and again, I didn't feel comfortable with the way they were treating her. I had her transferred to UVA and they saved her life.

IMO, if you are actually diagnosed with a serious illness, it can't hurt and can be prudent to seek a 2nd opinion or seek treatment at facility that specializes in that illness. But to pursue 2nd, 3rd, 4th or more opinions and repeat testing for something that has been ruled out is just paid reassurance seeking.

Positive thoughts